by Ava McKnight
“Whatever,” she teased. But then her dire situation settled back in her brain and she added, “It doesn’t matter about Chase anyway. I’m totally calling the whole thing off.”
Saying those words out loud made her insides seize up.
Her brother asked, “Why? What’d he do?”
Treat me like a queen. Spoil me rotten.
Tears burned the backs of her eyes.
“Suffice it to say,” she told him in a suddenly shaky voice, “I can’t juggle romance and a job like this one. Chase did something really nice for me, I overindulged and missed the most important meeting of my career. The one that would have for-sure landed me the VP position. I am clearly not cut out for work and play.”
“Sounds like horseshit to me.”
“Do you talk like this with your clients? Is that why the CEOs love having cigars and scotch with you?”
“Guys shoot the breeze, Cass. What do you talk about in your meetings? The weather?”
“No,” she ground her teeth. “Business. Their business.”
“Bor-ing.”
“And that’s why you eventually lose accounts, Gav,” she snapped. “You and Chase are great with the pitch and the old-boys’-club camaraderie, but when it comes to drilling down into your customers’ needs, you’re on an airplane to try to snag a new client while I’m doing all the research.”
“At least I set my alarm in the morning, toots.”
“Fuck you.” She crossed her arms over her chest and bristled.
Beside her, Gav chuckled. “Damn, I’m going to get a lot of mileage out of this one.”
“You realize I hate you at the moment.”
“Nice try. But let’s get back to this Logan thing. Did he do something to piss you off?”
“No.”
“Then what’s the real problem, Cass?”
Letting out a long breath, she said, “I’m just not wired to have it all, you know? Not like Mom.”
“Whoa, hold on there. What the hell does that mean?”
She shrugged, feigning nonchalance, though emotion clogged her throat, making it difficult to speak. “I’m just saying, she had her shit together. All the time. And she had everything she ever wanted. She made it all happen for herself. I’m not the least bit like her. I can’t multitask or divide my attention. I’ve proven that quite resoundingly with this E-L debacle.”
“First,” Gav said, “you can still pull a rabbit from your hat and get another chance with Shipley.”
“His assistant told mine he’s not interested in rescheduling.”
“Get clever, Cass. Secondly, no, you are not like Mom. But that’s okay. I mean, I know you put her on a pedestal—Dad and I did too. For the record, though, she had a much different job than you. She worked in a scrapbooking store, Cass. She clocked in at nine and punched out at three. No one gave her an iPhone and told her she had to be connected to her customers twenty-four-seven. She didn’t have to solve crises at ten o’clock on a Friday night or four in the morning on a Sunday.”
He had a point…
“Not to mention,” Gav continued, “she never had to take her work home. She left it at the store, came and picked us up from school, took us to the grocery store and had dinner on the table when Dad came through the door at six-thirty. We helped her clean up and then we did our homework while she wrote letters to her sisters and parents, and Dad went into his study to do more work.”
Cassidy had never really thought of the fact her mother was able to manage all aspects of her life because she wasn’t tied to a job around the clock. Yet…
“The bottom line is that I choose to be at the beck-and-call of my clients and my boss. It’s how I ended up a director. If I’m in the middle of a thousand-dollar-a-plate charity dinner and an insured calls me to say his oil refinery has just blown up, I’m out of there and on a plane with an adjuster to the loss site.”
“You don’t always have to go with the adjuster, Cass. That’s their job.”
“True, but when my client is freaked to high hell because he’s just suffered a major catastrophe that could cost him millions—or billions—I want him to know I’m there to help. To explain everything he needs to know about his policies and coverages.”
“Which is why you’re damn good at what you do. But you can have a life too, you know?”
“Oh really?” she challenged as they pulled into his driveway. “Forget to invite your own sister to your wedding? Wait, no. You’re not wearing a gold band on your finger—and you’re two years older than me.”
“I don’t have time to get married, Cass.”
“I love it when you make my point for me.”
He glowered. “It’s not that I don’t want to get married. But no woman I’ve ever met is kosher with me being a road warrior. Chicks want a guy home every now and then. You know, for dinner with her parents and happy hour with her coupled-up friends.”
“Weekends with the kids?”
“Yeah.”
“We are rather unorthodox, aren’t we?”
He unlatched his seatbelt and got out of the Range Rover. She followed suit. While retrieving her bag, he said, “There’s no rule written that says we can’t have a life and a career. We choose not to.”
“No,” she insisted. “I chose to try to have both. It didn’t work! My focus has to be on one thing. I’m literally incapable of balance.”
With a shake of his head, he led the way up the stone path to his colonial-style home. “Take a few deep breaths, sis. Have some wine. Chill out.”
“No wine,” she grumbled.
Pulling the keys from his pants pocket, he said, “Everyone screws up from time to time. What makes you think you have to be perfect every single second of the day?”
“I could lose my job, Gav.”
“Maybe. And then you’ll get another one. Come work for me at Hamilton.”
“I have a no-compete clause, you know that.”
“For a year upon giving your resignation. We discussed this before you signed your letter of intent with MII. Getting fired nullifies the non-compete.”
“I didn’t think about that. Then again, I never in a million years imagined I’d get canned.”
“You haven’t yet.”
He opened the door and she followed him in. She would have stayed in her old bedroom at her parents’ house, but her dad was out of the country on business and she wasn’t in the mood to ramble around a big empty pad feeling lonely and blue. At least the brotherly ribbing she got from Gav kept her from wallowing in her devastation.
She considered what he’d said about working for him while she rolled her bag into one of his spare bedrooms. She’d purposely gone to Hamilton Insurers’ competition to prove she could land a job in industrial risk insurance without her brother and father putting in good words for her. Having succeeded at that, would it be so bad to rely on her connections to get an interview with Hamilton?
Her jaw clenched briefly. Maybe she was getting ahead of herself.
Then again, maybe not…
* * * * *
Chase paced his living room, cell phone in hand. He’d been calling Cassidy since the previous evening to find out how her meetings went. But she didn’t pick up. Now it was Saturday afternoon, and she still wasn’t answering. He knew better than to assume she’d turned her phone off. Round-the-clock connectivity was the name of their insurance game. So what was the deal?
He’d give Meg a jingle if he knew her number. He’d never learned it because he’d always contacted Cassidy directly when he wanted to speak with her. The fact that she’d suddenly gone silent rattled his cage.
Having spent all of yesterday in Tucson with clients, he hadn’t been in the office to hear any news on her meet-and-greet with Pryce Shipley. Chase was anxious to know the outcome.
At first, he’d thought he suffered a hint of jealousy that she’d landed the appointment so quickly when it’d taken him months. But the more he thought about it, and the more agitat
ed he became over not being able to reach her, he came to realize that he honestly just wanted to hear good news from her.
He wanted to hear that the advice he’d given her had panned out. He wanted to hear that she’d succeeded in bringing in an enormous account that rivaled his absolute best. He wanted to hear her laugh and tell him in an excited tone how happy she was to have taken such a bold chance by going after a prestigious company.
And that’s when Chase realized that he really could lose this promotion to her and be okay with it. Because she deserved it as much as he did. And because it would make her happy. That meant something to Chase.
Because he was in love with her.
Whoa. Huge revelation.
Or maybe not. Maybe he’d known it all along, he’d just been cautious about admitting it to himself because they’d always been in a tenuous situation.
He barely had time to process these new thoughts. His iPhone rang.
Jerking his hand upward, he consulted the screen and breathed a sigh of relief. He connected the call and said, “Jesus Christ, I was starting to think your plane went down or something.”
Cassidy groaned. “Hardly the thing to say to a woman on a junket.”
“Sorry. But what the hell, Cass? You haven’t answered any of my million or so calls.”
“I know. I didn’t mean to ignore you, it’s just that I have a lot on my mind and I needed to work some of it out first.”
“So come over and tell me all about it.”
A long pause ensued.
“Cass?”
“I’m not in Scottsdale. I’m in Hartford. Staying with my brother. I called to tell you I can’t make our date tomorrow. I won’t be back until late in the evening.”
His brows knitted together. “What are you doing in Harford again?”
And why did dread suddenly snake through his veins?
“It’s kind of complicated. I just… I needed to spend some time with my family. Well, my brother, since my dad’s in Hong Kong on business.”
Chase sank onto the sofa. “Something wrong, babe?”
More silence. Then a deep sigh. “Yes, actually. I, um… I totally blew the meeting with Pryce Shipley. We won’t be getting E-L back any time soon. Like… Never.”
“Damn, I’m sorry.” And he knew how devastated she’d be, because she took her work so seriously. “What happened, babe?”
“I missed the meeting.”
Chase’s head snapped back in surprise. “How? You were in Pittsburgh the night before.”
“Yeah, well… It doesn’t really matter. I fucked the whole thing up and I just might be out on my ass come Monday, so I’ve kinda been taking stock of the whole situation.”
“McClellan is not going to can you, Cass.”
“Chances are good, Chase.”
“So what sort of stock are you taking?”
He heard her swallow hard. Why the hell did he have such a bad feeling about this? He wished they were having this conversation in person, because he needed to see her expression. He’d suggest they FaceTime, but she continued on.
“Look, I got in way over my head with all of this.”
His gut clenched. “All of what?”
“The competition for the promotion. The attempt at building new business. Us.”
“Whoa-ho.” He jumped to his feet, panic gripping him. “Hold the phone there, babe. Don’t—”
“Chase, just listen.” Her tone was sharp, full of tension. “I told you when we were in Flagstaff that I’m not like you. I’m not all about jet-setting and bip-bopping around. I like being grounded. I like having a stable itinerary. I like focusing on my work and not getting all caught up in… Other things.”
“Am I to assume that I’m an other things?”
“Yes.”
His fist balled at his side. “Don’t say you want to stop seeing me, Cass.”
“It’s not necessarily a want. It’s a need. I can’t manage all of this. I completely lost it in Pittsburgh and I know that wouldn’t have happened if I would have been thinking of nothing other than landing E-L. If my sole concentration had been on my job, I wouldn’t be terrified of losing it right now.” Her voice cracked.
Chase was literally out of his mind with shock and apprehension. What the hell had gone so horrifically wrong in Pittsburgh that she’d convinced herself McClellan would fire her?
“Cass,” he said, trying to maintain a calm tone. No easy feat. “Babe. Just take a few deep breaths. I’m sure it’s not as bad as all that.”
“Chase, I’m considering interviewing with Hamilton.”
“In Connecticut?” he demanded. Jesus, she might as well drive a stake through his heart. “Are you fucking kidding me?”
“I have to get fired first,” she said in a tentative voice, “to get out of my no-compete clause.”
“Oh fuck, no.” He paced again, his agitation and stress ratcheting to an almost unbearable degree. His palms began to sweat. “Tell me this is some sick joke.”
“No joke. I need a backup plan. I have a mortgage and a car payment. A future to think about.” Her voice was filled with panic. “Gav will hire me. It’s a manager’s position, not even a director, but… It’s a job.”
“Cass.” He drew up short. Were those heart palpitations he felt? Damn, he could barely even pull in a full breath. “You need to come back. We need to talk. Just…don’t do anything drastic. Don’t freak on me. Okay? Do. Not. Freak.”
Speak for yourself, dude.
He scowled.
“Gav and I are headed out to dinner. Like I said, I just wanted to let you know that I won’t make our date tomorrow. I’ll see you in the office. But, Chase… I can’t do the whole dating thing. It’s just not in my DNA.”
“The fuck it isn’t,” he ground out. “Don’t give up so damn soon. That’s not in your DNA.”
“I have to go. I… I just… I have to go.” She hung up.
“Goddamn it!” he roared. And channeled every ounce of willpower into not throwing his phone across the room.
What the hell had just happened?
* * * * *
Cassidy arrived at MII at eight a.m. sharp. Meg followed her into her office.
“Are you okay?” her assistant asked. “Because Chase has been here since seven and he keeps poking his head out the door to see if you’ve come in.”
Her brow crooked. “You were here at seven?”
“Sure. I wanted to be available in case you came in early.”
Cassidy smiled, though the corners of her mouth quivered with emotion. “Thanks. I appreciate that. I would have been in sooner, except… I didn’t see the point. McClellan doesn’t get in before eight and I wanted to savor my position as director a bit longer.”
“Yeah, well, bad news. Word has spread. Seems Terry in Underwriting heard from someone he knows at Cooper Alliance that Epperson-Langley is in the market for a new insurer and neither Hamilton nor MII are in the running.”
“So McClellan knows I didn’t score with Pryce Shipley.”
“And he’ll likely ask why.”
“Indeed.”
Her phone rang. Meg snatched the receiver as Cassidy set her laptop bag on the desk. She wondered if there was any point to pulling out her computer.
Meg confirmed no with just a look. She replaced the handset and said, “You’re wanted upstairs.”
“Christ,” she mumbled. “It’s not even two minutes after eight.”
“Guess he’s chomping at the bit.”
With a nod, Cassidy said, “I’d ask you to wish me luck, but I suspect it’d be futile.”
“I’m wishing you luck anyway. Fingers and toes crossed.” Meg smiled and added, “Don’t ask me to cross my legs, because I have a date tonight.”
Cassidy laughed, despite her melancholy. “Might I inquire with whom?”
“Jared from the Ocean Club. He’s actually taking me out, not making his usual house call. Go figure.”
“Hmm, nice.”
> “Don’t get too excited. We’re just going to end up in the same position we always do. Then I’ll send him home.”
Her brows drew together. “Why not let him stay the night?”
“That would imply there’s something between us.”
“And that would be bad?”
“I don’t trust him with my heart, Cass.”
“Has he given you reason not to?”
Meg shrugged. “Not necessarily, no. But come on. You’ve seen the man. He’s as hot as Chase. And look at all the women who trip over themselves for him. You’re just in a better position than me, because Chase doesn’t seem to notice them at all.”
“First,” she said, fighting off the wince. “Jared didn’t give any other woman the time of day when we were at the bar, except to serve their drinks. Hell, he barely spoke to me and I was sitting right next to you. Second, Chase and I are… Well. No more.”
Her face fell. “What the hell?”
“I’ll explain later,” Cassidy said, her heart twisting. “Time to face the music.”
She headed out, but Meg caught her before she made it to the door. “Cass. McClellan doesn’t know why you missed the meeting. Only I do. And you know I’d never say a word.”
“Because you’re not only a great assistant but a great friend. I appreciate that, Meg. But I know why I missed that meeting. I can’t lie about it.”
She left the office and took the walk of shame to the elevator. On the top floor, she sat in the reception area, wanting desperately to bit her nails. It was like being summoned to the principal’s office with no valid excuse for your wrongdoing and expulsion looming on the horizon.
Lord, it’d been difficult enough telling Gav what had happened in Pittsburgh. She’d eventually have to tell her father, when he returned from Hong Kong. How thoroughly humiliating. And how disappointed in her he’d be.
“Mr. McClellan will see you now,” Tilly said.
Cassidy walked to the far end of Mahogany Row, past Tom Doherty’s office—the one that could have been hers.
McClellan’s EA smiled up at her and stood. She escorted Cassidy inside the CEO’s vast corner office, done up richly and elegantly.
“Miss Reynolds to see you,” the assistant announced before backing out of the room.