by B. Love
What was the point of having my own business, time, and money, not to mention this gorgeous man, if I didn’t take advantage of it? If we left tonight, we’d have all of Saturday and Sunday to ourselves before having to return home Monday morning.
Monday morning.
I had to meet with Doctor Berry.
Monday morning.
I was supposed to be going back home.
Fine.
“OK. I can’t believe you did this. This is going to be so much fun, Knight. Thank you!”
I jumped into his arms and gave him the reaction he was probably hoping for. Our lips connected long enough to have my panties growing wet before I pulled away.
“I better finish getting ready,” I said as he put me down.
“Yea. I agree. Otherwise your best friend is going to hear the sounds you make when I’m deep in that pussy.”
“Wow,” I turned at the sound of Knight’s voice. Deja was running her fingers through my big, loose curls one final time before she left. “You look…” Knight shook his head as he looked me over from head to toe. “Stunning. You’re beautiful, Charlie.”
I blushed and lowered my head as Deja excused herself.
“Thanks, Knight. You’re very handsome tonight. Not that you aren’t handsome every night, but that red against your skin just… takes you to another level.”
“As it does you.”
I looked at myself in the mirror as he walked over to me. The red, sleeveless gown that I wore was tight fitting at the top and loose and flowy at the bottom.
“I hope you’re prepared to be reapplying this red lipstick the entire night,” he warned me.
“No need. It’s lip stain so it won’t be coming off any time soon.”
“Good.”
His lips seized mine and he pulled me into him – letting me feel every inch of what I’d done to him.
“I’m heading out, Lie! Have fun!” Deja yelled from downstairs.
“Thank you!” I replied as I licked Knight off my lips.
He took a step back and readjusted his jacket.
“We need to go before we end up not going at all,” Knight grabbed his phone and keys from the dresser. “Have you heard from Harlem? She wanted to come and take pictures before we…”
The door opened and closed again and we heard Harlem talking on the phone. I followed Knight down the stairs anxiously. I could’ve skipped the gala entirely at this point, but we’d already missed casino night so I wanted to at least go for an hour or two. Harlem ended her call at the sight of Knight, and when he stepped to the side and she saw me she squealed and grabbed Knight’s hand.
“Y’all fucked didn’t it?”
“Harlem!”
Knight pulled his hand away from her as I hung my head, trying and failing horribly at holding my laugh in.
“Excuse me. Y’all had sex didn’t it?”
“That ain’t none of your damn business crazy ass lil girl!”
“You don’t have to tell me. I see it all over Charlie’s face.”
That got me to lift my head and look from her to Knight.
“What the hell does that mean, Harlem?” Knight asked getting all up in her personal space.
“She’s glowing. She has the I been getting me some di – she’s glowing.”
“What you know about glowing from sex?”
Harlem pointed towards her stomach with a confused look on her face and I laughed even harder. Knight looked like he was about to pop a vessel, so I walked over to him and wrapped my arm around his waist.
“Y’all a couple now? You can at least tell me that.”
“Harlem, you’ve got about three seconds to take your pictures and get out before I strangle you.”
“You wouldn’t dare strike a pregnant lady would you?”
He looked at her for all of about two seconds before she was taking our picture. I tried to hide it, but I kind of wanted to hear the answer to that too. Were we in a relationship? I mean… I know he said that I belonged to him and all of that… but was that just manly sex talk? Or did he really mean that? I needed to hear him literally say that we were in a relationship before I believed it was real.
As soon as we made it to the gala I was ready to go, but we knew that we had to make an appearance. The gala was our idea. We had to be here. Two hours was the allotted time we agreed on. We were ten minutes away from that when I fixed us what would be our last drink of the night. I handed Charlie hers and was about to take a sip from mine when I heard someone call my name.
“Coach Frank?” I mumbled as I turned around.
Coach Frank. My high school basketball coach. He was the reason I was in the position I was in today. When I started my ninth grade year he was the assistant coach. The head coach at the time didn’t see the talent and potential I had. Because of that, he never had me in the starting lineup.
Coach Frank went to bat for me and made sure that I was in the starting lineup whenever we had scouts in the building. Eventually it became the norm for every game. By my junior year, he was the head coach and I was the captain of the team.
I sat my drink down and we shook hands and hugged.
“Coach Frank, it’s good to see you, man. How are you?”
“I’m good. Good. Not as good as you, though. Who is this beautiful woman you have here with you?”
Charlie put her drink down to shake his hand as I introduced them.
“This is my girlfriend Charlie White.”
Her head jerked towards me with her mouth open in shock before she closed it and smiled. Coach laughed as I looked down at her in disbelief. My silly ass woman.
“Why are you looking like that, Charlie? What did you think I meant when I told you that you belonged to me?”
She shrugged and removed her hand from Coach’s absently.
“I don’t know. I mean… I just tho–”
I kissed any doubts she had away before she could even let them fall out of her mouth. When I released her she took a step back and stared at me like she wanted me to throw her on top of the table and have my way with her.
“I meant that shit, Charlie,” was all I said.
Charlie licked her lips and nodded before hugging me in that tight way that somehow made me feel free. Only with her. I smiled and kissed her neck as I hugged her back.
“Can we go now?” her arms went from around my neck to my chest. She looked into my eyes as she unbuttoned my jacket. “Please?”
I grabbed her hand and was about to lead her out of the ballroom, but the sight of Coach Frank reminded me that I’d forgotten all about him.
“Shit. My fault, Coach.”
“Oh no need. You two have fun.”
He tipped his drink at me and winked at Charlie. That was all it took for her to get embarrassed, but she wasn’t about to change her mind on me and try to make us stay. I quickly led her out of the ballroom and to my car.
“I’m so embarrassed. He probably thinks I’m crazy.”
“He might think you’re a little crazy, but he thinks I’m crazy too so that means you’re perfect for me.”
She giggled and wrapped her arms around mine as we rushed to the car.
Vegas was amazing! It wasn’t my first time visiting, but it was my first time visiting and feeling so alive and free. I returned to Memphis filled with love and positivity that I believed no one could pull me out of – until I walked into Doctor Berry’s office.
He offered me the seat across from his and released a loud, stressed breath as he sat down. My heart began to beat at a more rapid pace as I watched him tap his pen on his desk while he stared at me. As if he was trying to figure out how he was going to say whatever it is he called me in to say.
During our stay in Vegas, Knight and I showered together. During that shower things got a little heated, which led to me being pushed under the shower head. The semi straight hair that I was enjoying for the past few days was now gone and replaced with my natural curls. I had it all pulled up int
o the bun I'd put it in after our shower. It's a shame to say, but I can't do much of anything with my hair when it's in its natural state. It's too much of it. Too wild. Too big. Too full. Too long. Too curly. But I love it. And so does Knight.
Anyway, I squeezed at the ball on the top of my head about five times before Doctor Berry placed the pen on his desk and cupped his hands together. He sighed again and shook his head. Would he just spill it already??? What could he possibly have to tell me that he was dreading this much? Couldn't have been anything about my health. My family. What was the freaking problem?
“Charlie, there's something that you should know. Something that you should've known a long time ago. I… we never thought it would matter, so that's why I never said anything. I can't speak for anyone else.”
“Just tell me what you have to tell me, Dr. Berry.”
He rubbed his hand over his face and sighed again.
“Do you know Knight’s family? His mother?”
“I know his youngest sister. Harlem. I know that he has another one, but I've never met her before. Or his father. And I know that his mother died years ago. Why? Is something wrong with Knight?”
He scratched the bridge of his nose and looked towards the door.
“No, Charlie,” his eyes returned to me. “Do you know his mother’s name? When she died? How she died?”
Growing frustrated with this 20 questions game, I sat up in my seat and placed my hand on his desk.
“Just tell me what you have to tell me,” I repeated with more sternness in my voice than before.
“His mother died 10 years ago. Same day of your heart surgery,” not catching the connection I continued to stare at him in silence. “His mother was Angela. Angela Carver.”
What
The
Fuck.
Not my Angela.
Not the Angela who chose me.
Who gave me her heart.
No.
That
That couldn't have been his mother.
How could I have not put two and two together with them having the last name?
“Angela? His mother’s name is Angela?”
My heartbeats sped up. They grew harder. My heart thumped against my rib cage wildly. And my breathing came out just as fast and hard. Trying not to go into a panic, I pushed my seat back and leaned forward.
“Not my Angela. Not the one who gave me her heart,” I looked at him with pleading eyes. “This is another Angela Carver. Right? Not the same one.”
His silence was my answer along with his hung head. All of the open space that was in his office before began to close around me. The walls grew tighter and tighter. Pulled themselves around me closer and closer.
“Oh my God.”
I stood and paced around the suddenly way too small space.
“How could this be? He's… he's not going to want to have anything to do with me.”
My chest started rising and falling harder. Quicker. My heart started beating harder. Quicker. So quick I started feeling like it was going to explode. I felt like I couldn't breathe. Short choppy breaths came out in spurts feeling like they were going to strangle me. My hands began to sweat and shake, and before I could stop them tears were streaming down my face.
Doctor Berry stood and walked over to me. He grabbed my shoulder and led me back to my seat.
“Relax, Charlie. Calm down before you have a panic attack.”
“But. He. He. I didn't. Dr. Berry. I.”
My words just like my lungs were failing me. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't breathe. I grabbed my neck and tried not to let my emotions overpower me.
Doctor Berry’s hand went to the middle of my back and he pushed, causing me to lower my head between my legs.
“Close your eyes and take long, slow breaths for me, Charlie. Breathe. Breathe. Nice and slow. Inhale two lungs full of air for me. Long and slow, Charlie.”
Forcing my lungs to open again, I did as Doctor Berry asked, and after about five deep breaths my breathing had returned to normal.
“That's it. Just relax.”
I palmed my face and continued to breathe as my legs shook. When my heartbeats returned to normal I sat back in my seat and inhaled deeply one last time.
“I see your breathing is back to normal. Let me check your heart.”
Doctor Berry pulled his stethoscope from around his neck as I shook my head.
“That's not necessary, Dr. Berry, I’m…”
Before I could finish he was listening to my heart.
“Give me a deep breath in, Charlie,” I did. “And exhale,” I did. “Inhale,” I did. “Exhale.”
I did. Pleased with what he heard, he stood and returned to his seat. He didn't speak right away, and I didn't mind now. I didn't mind the silence. I didn't mind it one bit.
“Are you going to tell him, Charlie? He doesn’t know just like you didn’t.”
Should I? Maybe things would be best if I didn’t tell him. What if he breaks up with me? Am I willing to risk not having him anymore just to tell the truth? A truth he isn’t asking for? But should I risk losing him by keeping it from him?
“Why’d you have to tell me?” I grabbed my purse off the floor and stood. “Why couldn’t you just let me stay in my perfect little happy loving bubble?”
Doctor Berry smiled as he stood.
“Because I care about you and I didn’t want you to find out in any other way. Knight took losing his mother very hard. He was angry. Very angry. With God. With her. His father. Her doctor. I’m just… not sure how he’s going to react to you having his mother’s heart. I wanted you to be prepared.”
“Well… thank you.”
“Are you going to tell him?”
My middle and ring fingers ran down my scar as I walked towards his door.
“I guess so. Eventually. I should. I am.”
Doctor Berry nodded and placed his stethoscope back around his neck. He walked to his door and opened it for me. We walked out and started down the hall when Knight called me.
“This is him. I’ll see you later, Dr. Berry.”
“Be careful, Charlie. And please… know that I didn’t mean any harm.”
“Oh no. That’s… I know you told me because you care about me and I appreciate it honestly. It’s just… a hard pill that I’m struggling to swallow right now, but I will.”
“OK. I’ll let you get to your call.”
I nodded and waited until he was a few steps away before I answered.
“Hi.”
“What’s up?”
“About to head to my first client of the day. What you doing?”
“Just got off the phone with Ozart Raid.”
His name sounded familiar, but I couldn’t place where I knew it from. I started walking down the hall as I repeated the name over and over in my head.
“Ozart Raid. Why does that sound familiar?”
“He’s a retired coach. Used to be the Grizzlies coach before he retired.”
“Right. Right. What did he want?”
“He wants me to announce a charity basketball game he’s having in New York.”
“That’s great, babe! When is it?”
“Two weekends away.”
The pout that was about to cover my face faded away when I stepped outside and felt the sun’s rays shining down on me. I smiled and looked around the parking lot for my car.
“Oh. How long will you be gone?”
“Just the weekend. I’ll leave Friday and be back late Sunday night.”
“That’s not too bad. I guess I can be without you.”
He chuckled deep in his throat and I bit down on my lip.
“Listen… I was thinking.”
“About?”
After unlocking my car, I tossed my purse in the backseat and got in – making no effort to start the car until our conversation was over.
“I should meet your family before I go,” I didn’t realize I hadn’t answered him until he spoke again. “Cha
rlie?”
“Huh?”
“I said I should meet your family before I go.”
“Yea. Yea. Sure. Um… you… you really want to do that? That means things are getting serious doesn’t it?”
“They are. For me.”
My smile was tortured as I rested my forehead on the steering wheel. I should just tell him now. I should just tell him now and get it out the way. Just tell him now and let him decide what to do with it. What to do with us.
“Me too.”
The hell? I lifted my head and smacked my own damn forehead.
“So… you should make that happen, beauty. I don’t wanna be just some random that your family has no idea about. I want them to know who I am to you because I’m going to make sure my family knows who you are to me.”
That was it. There was no way I could tell him at this point. At least not right now.
“I would like that, Knight. A lot. I really like you. So much.”
“I like you. Bring your ass when you’re done working.”
I did not plan on spending my Friday afternoon going over to Tage’s house. He showed up at my doorstep this afternoon with Harlem. Let her tell it she had no idea he was going to be here waiting for her. I’d been letting her drive my spare car, so when she pulled up he was pulling up right behind her.
She hadn’t been talking to him at school or when she was at home, so he took the initiative to follow her home and force her to talk to him. I gave him points for that, and when he asked to speak with me he earned even more.
Tage said that he wanted to go ahead and tell his parents about the baby. He was ready to step up. He wanted to be there with Harlem every step of the way. I was all for it and even offered to be there for him.
When we got to his home he was visibly nervous. Like fidgeting nervous. Sensing his nervous energy, I kept Harlem behind me and walked a little in front of Tage as well. For whatever reason he was really afraid of telling his parents, and I wanted him to know that I was going to be there for him no matter how it played out.