Audra didn't move the cup out of the way. "It's a sleep tea. Helps you relax, which might help with those nightmares you keep having."
Jean jerked his head up so he could meet her knowing eyes. "I don't have nightmares."
"If you say so, but you sure are restless at night."
Rather than tell her what had kept him up last night, Jean grabbed the tea and took a cautious sip. It tasted of flowers and not much else. "Thanks."
He didn't remember finishing the tea until Audra reached in front of him to take the empty cup away. He was too intent on getting his thoughts down about the paper before he forgot.
"Are we going out to Doppler Hill tomorrow?" she asked.
"Yeah," he replied.
"Then lights out in five minutes. We both need sleep, as we'll have to hike across the glacier."
Once again, he met her resolute gaze. "You're not my mother." Thank the universe for that.
Audra laughed. "Nope. I'm something worse. Your expedition leader, and the safety officer. Our safety tomorrow depends on both of us being well-rested and alert. I will confiscate whatever I have to in order to keep us both safe. You're not breaking your leg again on my watch, bird boy." She dropped something heavy onto the bunk beside him. "And this is for you."
Jean picked up the hot water bottle. "I don't need this," he lied as welcome warmth spread through his fingers. If anything could soothe the ache in his legs, it was this, but he didn't dare admit his weakness to her.
"Which pain meds are you taking, then?" Audra proceeded to list the name of every pill he'd brought with him.
Jean clamped his mouth shut and shook his head.
"We both know that's bullshit. You've been limping since yesterday, and now you're not. Tell me which ones you've taken or I'll go through your bags. I will drug test you, Jean, if I think you've taken something that compromises the safety of this expedition."
Glowering, he dug out the pill package and held it out to her. Audra read the box, nodded once, then handed it back to him.
"What about the ones you were taking at Christmas? Did you bring those?" she demanded.
Jean sagged. "No. I stopped taking them before New Year's." He had to ask. "Are you going to report me for them?"
"Your name was on the prescription label on the box, so I presume they were legally yours, just like the ones you took tonight."
Cautiously, Jean nodded.
Audra took a deep breath. "If I have to choose between working alongside a man who's exhausted and has slower response times because he's in constant pain, or one who's taking pain medication that I know about and can compensate for, I'll pick the second. It takes an incredible amount of guts to come back here after what happened to you last time. I mean, I saw what state you were in. Which is why I can't let it happen again, and why I'm willing to help you now. You're a bloody trooper, Jean." The way she said it sounded like a compliment.
"Thanks," he said awkwardly.
"Now accept the bloody hot water bottle, or I'll wait until you're asleep and shove it into your sleeping bag with you."
Audra inside his sleeping bag. Now that would be interesting. Jean grinned. "Yes, ma'am," he said.
THIRTY-SIX
Jean stretched out on his bunk, lifting his tablet in front of his face so he could reread the chapter he'd written on Heard Island. The only thing missing from his thesis now was the elusive Atlas Cove rookery.
"So what did you think of dinner?" Audra asked.
It had been her turn to make it, and Jean had dutifully eaten it, though his was all gone now. He couldn't even remember what it tasted like. He couldn't say that, though.
She laughed. "We're a pair, aren't we? The rest of the world is celebrating Valentine's Day with their nearest and dearest, or the people they'd like to be, yet here we are, on an island so isolated that it may as well be a secret known only to penguins and seals. Working!" She waved at her open laptop.
"Valentine's Day?" Jean checked the date on his tablet. That meant they'd only been on Heard Island for three weeks. It felt like longer. They'd surveyed both Spit Point and Doppler Hill colonies, set up Audra's weather station, and they still had a week to spare.
"Yes, Valentine's Day," Audra said. "You know, when couples get all romantic?"
Jean shrugged. "I've never really done much for Valentine's Day. It's just a big commercial stunt, to get people to spend more money on stuff they don't need. Flowers. Chocolates. Greeting cards. Fancy food. Pointless, really." That had always been Dairine's opinion, and Jean had agreed with her.
"Flowers and cards might be a bit over the top, but I draw the line at fancy food and chocolate. If you didn't enjoy the mango chicken as much as I did, I'll keep the rest for myself. And as for the Tim Tams...ha! Good luck getting any of those out of me." Audra brandished the cookie package.
"Now that's harsh. Those rations are for both of us." Jean had grown quite fond of the Australian cookies, which Audra usually shared.
"What'll you trade me for them, bird boy?"
Jean considered for a moment, before he said, "I have a bottle of whisky from home that I planned to drink once my work here was done. We're finished with our fieldwork here, earlier than scheduled. That's worth celebrating for sure, even if we still have the survey at Atlas Cove still to go. Worth a glass or two now, though."
Audra wet her lips. "You know, I've been thinking about Atlas Cove. I'm supposed to set up the second weather station there. I know we're meant to wait for the Investigator to return and transport all our equipment up there in a week or two, but it looks to me like there's already a camp up there we could use. If we loaded a Zodiac with all the bare essentials and picked a calm day, we could make it up there by ourselves. Even if it's too rough to head back, we could just radio the Investigator to pick us up there instead of here. By all accounts, it's a more sheltered anchorage out there. What do you think?"
Jean wanted to hug her. More than anything, he wanted to find those Wharf Point penguins. He knew he hadn't imagined them. "I think it's a great idea," he said. "There is a hut there, and we made sure everything was operational last year. We'd need food, water, fuel and our packs. That's it, really. As long as the weather's good, but I'll leave that in your capable hands." It was a standing joke between them that, despite her protestations to the contrary, Audra did actually control the weather, because they'd only lost one day to bad weather in the entire three weeks.
She looked surprised. "You're brave to go back there, after what happened last time. Are you sure?"
No. He wasn't brave. It wasn't courage driving him at all, but the desire for adventure. To discover. To be the first. "In one of the expeditions a few years back, there's an unconfirmed report about king penguins breeding at Wharf Point, where they've never been seen before. A new colony would show that they're not just recovering, but expanding. I was trying to get a good view of their beach last year when I...when I had the accident."
Audra nodded knowingly. "So that's why you came back. You want to discover something no one else has seen before, and share it with the world. They're your penguins, just like these are my weather stations. And here I thought you were just some ex-military survivor type, trained to survive, no matter what. Instead, you're a scientist, in the truest sense of the word. Like the early explorers who came out here, risking their lives to discover, or the most dedicated medical scientists, injecting themselves with diseases so they can prove their vaccine works. We'll get to Atlas Cove, and if your penguins are there, I'll help you find them."
Jean's eyes met hers. She did understand. Like few people ever could, and no woman he'd ever met. More than ever, now he understood why everyone she worked with seemed to sing her praises. He'd officially joined the choir. He didn't want to sing right now, though. Instead, he experienced the overpowering desire to kiss her.
"I better pour that whisky," he said. He found two cups and poured them each a measure.
Audra cautiously sniffed at her cup. "It doesn't
smell like any whisky I've had before. And you drink it straight?"
"It's cinnamon whisky. It comes from Canada, but we managed to convince enough Americans to try it that now you can buy it pretty much everywhere in the States, too. Try it. You'll like it."
They both lifted their cups.
"To the Atlas Cove expedition," Audra said.
They both drank. Jean felt the familiar burn coat the back of his throat, but Audra erupted in a coughing fit.
"Oh God. I don't know how you can drink this straight. It's like setting fire to your whisky and drinking it while it's still ablaze," she rasped. "Give me a mango beer any day."
"That might mix quite well with this," Jean said. "I got a six pack for Christmas that I haven't opened. We can try it when we get back to Davis."
"Ugh." Audra ripped open the cookie package. "I'm going to need these to get the taste out of my mouth." She bit off the end off a cookie, then stared at it a moment before she turned it around and bit the other end off.
Jean had seen other Aussies do this with coffee, but this wasn't the same. "Wait, don't – "
Audra dunked the cookie in her cup and wrapped her lips around one end, like the cookie was a giant straw. She gave an enormous slurp before her eyes widened in surprise. "Well, it's better than drinking the stuff straight," she said, blinking. She leaned in to suck on the cookie again.
"I should try that," he found himself saying. Anything to get the image of her blissfully sucking, her lips wrapped around... Jean shook his head and bit down on his own cookie, then dropped it into his own drink. "Oh shit."
Audra laughed at him and reached over to help him fish it out at the same time as he did. Their fingers tangled in the cup and warmth spread through Jean's whole body at the contact. He stared at her.
"You have chocolate on your nose," he said, wanting to wipe it away. No, he wanted to lick it away.
A blush coloured her cheeks, like she could read his mind. Her fingers tightened around his. "Jean, I – "
He kissed her. Softly at first, as her lips melted against his, then with more passion as he tasted chocolate and whisky and her. The perfect woman for him. The one he wanted more than anything. The one whose lips parted as she kissed him just as desperately as he kissed her.
Jean reached out to pull her close. Now he had her, he never wanted to let go.
THIRTY-SEVEN
One moment she had her hand stuck with his inside a cup, the next she was kissing Jean like her life depended on it. Like it was the most natural thing in the world. Like she wanted to climb into his lap, tear his clothes off and have her way with him.
Strong arms closed around her, reminding her of the day they first met.
The day she'd found out he had a wife.
Oh God. She was kissing a married man. That made her almost as bad as him.
Audra wrenched herself away from Jean, backing up until her back hit the wall of the tiny hut. She was still breathing hard and her heart beat so fast it was thrumming in her chest.
Out of passion for a married man who was cheating on his wife.
"Don't you ever do that again," Audra said, her voice shaking with fury. She stormed out of the hut, or tried to, but her foot caught on something. She managed not to fall over, though, so she kicked the obstacle out of her way and continued out without another word.
For what felt like hours, she marched up and down the beach, mad at Jean and even more angry at herself. She was as bad as Jay. Worse than Jay. He might have cheated on her, but he'd never seduced someone he knew was married.
When she crept back inside the hut, the smell of whisky was almost overpowering. Audra's foot clinked against the empty bottle, which had fallen on its side. Had he drunk the whole thing while she was outside? Judging by the snoring coming from his bunk, he most certainly had.
Fine. He could nurse his hangover all the way to Atlas Cove tomorrow. She'd forgotten to tell him that the forecast was perfect for their boat trip tomorrow morning, but now it was a fitting revenge for the cheating bastard.
THIRTY-EIGHT
When Jean woke the next morning, Audra still wasn't there. A kettle steamed on the stove, though, and several casks of water were missing. Had she left without him?
Bitch.
He stumbled out of the hut and breathed a sigh of relief when he spotted the Zodiac still on the beach. She'd loaded it with boxes of supplies and the water casks, and was now wrestling a gas bottle over the side. A fuel drum sat on the beach, waiting its turn.
"We leave in twenty minutes, so hurry up," she shouted.
Jean didn't need telling twice. He hurried back inside to pack his things, wrinkling his nose at the whisky fumes inside. No wonder he had a headache, breathing that in all night. After she'd changed her mind about wanting to kiss him, she'd kicked over the bottle in her haste to get outside. By the time Jean had gotten to it, the bottle was empty. So much for celebrating when they found his penguins.
Now he hated Valentine's Day more than anything.
He shoved his sleeping bag on top of everything else in his pack, not bothering to check how many ration packs he had in there. He knew they'd have enough – he hadn't touched them since he'd arrived.
Next, he poured some hot water in one of the dehydrated breakfast pouches and made himself a coffee while his breakfast was doing its thing.
Audra slammed the door open and grabbed her pack. "Are you coming, or what?"
Jean shouldered his pack, seized his coffee in one hand and his breakfast in the other, and followed her to the beach.
He managed to burn his mouth on the coffee, trying to drink it all before he needed both hands to help Audra load the boat. It seemed she'd packed everything, though, including the fuel drum. Superwoman.
He should never have kissed her. Should have kept his distance and satisfied himself with just dreaming about her until his job here was done. Now, he might have put the last part of his fieldwork in jeopardy.
"We are still going to Atlas Cove, right?" he ventured.
"Of course," she shot back. "Did you drink so much last night that you forgot?"
That shut him up. She'd had more alcohol than he had, before she'd kicked over the bottle so he couldn't drink any more.
The waves were headed northwest, the same direction they were going, so the trip was a lot smoother than Jean expected. Audra's thunderous expression had turned into one of intense concentration, but he figured if he didn't want her to kill him, he was still better off not talking to her.
He tried to keep his eyes off the water below them, turning his gaze instead on the coastline as they zoomed past. Glaciers cascaded off Big Ben like frozen waterfalls down to the sea. The mountain's peak was shrouded in cloud again today, making it look like the volcano was actually erupting. It wasn't, of course. Jean had asked the geologists last trip, who'd laughed and told him he'd know from the earthquakes that the volcano was stirring, long before anything came out the top.
So, he was back to worrying about the water, which would be just as cold as the last time he'd been here in Atlas Cove.
His breath caught in his throat as they rounded Wharf Point. The memory was too strong, after going over it so many times in his nightmares. This was where he'd nearly died. Where it could all happen again. Jean didn't open his eyes until he felt the bottom of the boat scrape against the beach.
"Give me a hand, will you? I need to secure the boat so we can unload it," Audra snapped.
Jean nodded, turning his back on the water to do what was necessary. He could do this. He could, he told himself.
He carried their gear up to the Apple hut that was still a hazy part of his dreams, still repeating his mantra in his mind.
"I want to get the uplink set up today, so I can start data collection in the morning. Are we good to do penguin hunting tomorrow after we set up the weather station?" Audra asked.
Once again, Jean nodded. He needed to get his head straight, on task, and right now he wasn't sure he could
face the Azorella Peninsula. Maybe if he took the boat, he'd be able to get close enough to the penguins to get an idea of whether there really was a population here, and return with Audra on the land side of the bay.
Tomorrow, he told himself.
THIRTY-NINE
Jean had barely said a word to her for all of yesterday, and most of this morning, so Audra was surprised to hear the boat engine fire up. She stumbled out of the hut just in time to see Jean headed out into the cove.
"You better not be leaving without me!" she shouted.
He hollered back something about penguins, pointing across the cove.
Of course. That new penguin colony he'd been so eager to find until yesterday, when he'd agreed to help her with her weather station first. So much for that idea. Selfish prick. A quick peep inside the hut told her he'd left most of his gear behind, so at least he'd be coming back.
That left her alone to her own devices, but that wasn't such a bad thing. Her instructions were to find an elevated position near the western camp to install the second weather station, and she knew just the spot: on the little peninsula just north of camp. The Azorella Peninsula, her map said, named for the cushion plants all over it. It would be best to set up her station as close as possible to one of the spots where earlier expeditions had taken their observations, Shelley had told her, though Audra had already planned to do that. If she won the Bureau's contest, she could do her doctorate out here, collating all the new weather data and comparing it to past observations, to see if anything had changed.
But first, she had to win that contest, which meant kicking things up a notch. Her videos were getting more views – a few hundred each – but she wanted to try live streaming again. The satellite uplink was securely fixed to the roof of the hut. Her laptop was connected to the internet via the uplink, and her camera fed everything it filmed direct to her laptop. Now was the time to see if it worked.
She grabbed the weather station and strapped her camera to her wrist. Audra paused to zip her coat up properly as she stepped outside, then marched with her head held high to the hill above the camp. From her vantage point, she could see Jean's boat cruising just offshore, maybe a hundred metres up the bay. She hoped he found his penguins.
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