Faith, Hope & Love
By
Kimberly Rae Jordan
Copyright ©2013
By Kimberly Rae Jordan
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic or mechanical without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations being used in reviews or articles about the book.
This is a work of fiction. The situations, characters, names and places are products of the author’s imagination, or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to locales, events, actual persons (living or dead) is entirely coincidental.
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For Susette
For the never ending encouragement to get my books out there for readers to enjoy. Your persistence has paid off! Thank you for not giving up on me and for so generously sharing your experiences and knowledge of this ePublishing industry.
Acknowledgement
To my husband who has encouraged me to pursue my dreams and has taken the time to read my stories. After not writing for many years, his support has allowed me to once again step into a world I love as I create the stories of my heart to share with you.
Table of Contents
Title page
Copyright
Dedication
Acknowledgement
Table of Contents
Prologue
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Epilogue
Prologue
A rooster crowed in the distance, coaxing Cassie from a deep sleep. She pulled her pillow over her head to block out the noises coming from beyond the screen window. It didn’t work. Groaning, Cassie turned over and opened her eyes. Sunlight streamed into the room. Though the brightness blinded her temporarily, she was glad for the sunshine. As the wife of a pilot, she’d always be happier to see the sun than clouds.
As she sat up and stretched, Cassie realized the last thing she remembered from the night before had been reading a book. Leaning over the side of the bed, she spotted it lying face down on the floor. Cassie grinned. She knew tiredness was one of the symptoms, but she hadn’t realized exactly how tired she’d be.
Resting back against the headboard, Cassie laid a hand on her still flat stomach. She planned to tell Quinn about it that night. The pregnancy test she’d taken the day before only confirmed what she’d suspected for the past week. Quinn had apparently been too busy to notice that her usual clockwork cycle was off.
Cassie knew he was going to be excited. They’d decided to start trying for a family after they had settled into their new home on the missionary center in Colombia. Cassie had begun to wonder if something was wrong when, after three months, she still hadn’t gotten pregnant but the fourth month had obviously been the one.
Cassie heard the water shut off in the bathroom and knew Quinn had finished his shower. She slid out from under the sheet and stood next to the bed working the kinks out of her neck. She was so thankful that as of yet she’d had no problems with morning sickness. Cassie hoped it stayed that way for the entire pregnancy.
As a nurse-midwife she’d helped plenty of women go through their pregnancies and deliveries but this was all new to her as a personal experience. She grinned at the thought of being the pregnant one for a change.
Thoughts of her plan to tell Quinn filled Cassie’s mind as she went into the bathroom. Quinn, clad in a pair of jeans, stood in front of the mirror shaving.
“Morning, Sunshine.” Quinn smiled and leaned down to give her a kiss. He took the towel from around his neck and wiped the smudge of shaving cream he’d left on Cassie’s cheek before cleaning off his own face.
Cassie slid her arms around his bare waist and kissed him again. He smelled of soap, toothpaste, and shaving cream. As much as she loved the cologne Quinn usually wore, Cassie also loved the scent of him fresh from the shower.
“You must have been pretty tired last night,” Quinn commented, running a hand up and down her back. “I looked over and there you were, sound asleep. Snoring.”
“I do not snore.” Cassie pulled back to give him a look of playful disgust. “You’re the one who snores.”
Quinn chuckled “Betcha couldn’t prove that about last night. You were out cold.”
Cassie gave Quinn another kiss before moving out of his embrace. “Yeah, I was pretty tired. I feel great this morning though.”
“Good. I’d hate to think you’re coming down with something.”
Cassie almost laughed. Oh yes, she was coming down with something. Nine months of something.
“You’re going to be back in time for supper, right?” Cassie asked.
“Yep.” Quinn shrugged into the shirt that had been hanging on the back of the bathroom door. “I have two flights today but as long as the weather holds, there should be no delays. Of course the first flight may take a while, depending on how long it takes the guys coming with me to do what they need to.”
“Oh right. They’re going to try and set up a generator and a computer, right?”
Quinn nodded. “Hopefully everything goes smoothly.”
“I’ll pray it does.” Cassie followed Quinn out of the bathroom. “So, what do you want for breakfast?”
“Nothing fancy. Some toast and fruit would be fine.”
Cassie headed for the small kitchen and began to prepare their breakfast. By the time Quinn joined her everything was ready.
They held hands and Quinn said grace. “Father, we commit our day to you. May Your will be done and Your name glorified in all that we do. Be with Cassie here at home, and with me and the guys during our flight. Give us good weather and safety. Be with our family back in Minneapolis and keep them healthy and safe. Thank you for this food and for Cassie for preparing it for us. In Jesus’ name, amen.”
“Amen,” Cassie echoed.
They talked about their day as they ate and then had a short devotional together. When the time came for Quinn to leave for work, Cassie walked him to the front door.
Bright sunlight and warmth embraced them as they stepped out onto the front porch of their small home. Cassie loved the missionary center where they lived. Green grass and huge leafy trees abounded on the center, giving it a lush, vibrant appearance. She imagined their child running barefoot along packed dirt paths and freshly cut grass. What a wonderful place for a child to grow up.
“Have a good day, Sunshine,” Quinn said, leaning down to kiss her.
Cassie held him tight and returned his kiss. “Fly with God, Quinn. I’ll see you later. I’m planning a special dinner for tonight so don’t be late.”
“I’ll try not to be.” Quinn rubbed his nose to hers. “Love you.”
“Love you too.” Cassie captured his face between her hands and gave him one last kiss.
Quinn headed off toward the nearby airplane hanger with a smil
e on his face. A smile lingered on Cassie’s lips too as she went back inside to clean up the dishes from breakfast.
Forty-five minutes later she heard the airplane engine roar to life. She was familiar with the different sounds and knew from the acceleration of the engine that the plane was taxiing out onto the runway. Wiping her hands on a dishtowel, Cassie stepped out the back door.
She could see the sunlight glinting off the white and blue metal of the small Cessna Quinn piloted. Cassie raised a hand to shade her eyes and watched the plane taxi to the end of the runway and turn around. It sat for a minute before beginning a gradually increasing pace down the runway.
Cassie waved as the plane went by. She didn’t know if Quinn saw her, but she liked to think the small tip of the wing as the plane soared into the clear, blue sky was Quinn’s way of saying good-bye to her.
She stood watching the plane grow smaller and smaller, a hand splayed against her stomach. “There goes your daddy, little one. He’s going to be the best daddy in the whole world. I love him very much and can’t wait to tell him about you tonight.”
After the plane had disappeared from sight, Cassie returned to the kitchen and her preparations for their special dinner.
Four hours later a knock interrupted her as she sat at the computer writing emails to family back in Minneapolis. Cassie went to answer the door thinking one of the pregnant women living on the missionary center had stopped by to visit and have a quick check-up.
When she saw Aaron Johnson, the center administrator, and his wife Cecily standing on the other side of the screen door her heart skipped a beat. They didn’t usually make casual visits in the middle of a workday, and even through the screen Cassie could see the seriousness of their expressions.
Something was wrong.
Cassie stood frozen several feet from the door. As long as she didn’t open the door. As long as they didn’t tell her. Everything would be okay.
“Hi Cassie. Can we come in?” Aaron asked.
Cassie closed her eyes and pressed her hands to her stomach. Surely God wouldn’t let anything happen to Quinn, not when the baby they’d prayed so hard for was finally on its way.
Chapter One
Cassie pressed down on the top of the suitcase with her knee then jerked the zipper around the corner, pulling it to meet the other one. She still had one suitcase left to pack but since it was mainly their clothing it would wait until closer to their departure date. With a grunt she hefted the bulging suitcase off the bed to the carpeted floor.
“Are you sure you’re doing the right thing?”
Cassie glanced to where her sister-in-law sat perched on the window seat, her cheek resting on her drawn up knees. Even from across the room Cassie could read the concern on Renee’s face. “I thought you were okay with this.”
Renee straightened, then shrugged. “I was.”
“And now you’re not.” Cassie went to sit beside her. “Why?”
“It seemed right when you first told me you were going to do this. I was glad you were getting on with your life. But now, with you leaving in less than a week…” Renee blinked and a tear slid down her cheek. “You and Jani are all I have left. I know Mom’s still alive, but she doesn’t even know who I am most days. And with Quinn gone too, I just hate to think of you so far away.”
Cassie reached out to take Renee’s hand. “We’ll be able to send emails, and thanks to that fancy new digital camera you got us, I can send pictures of Jani all the time.”
“So you saw through that gift, eh?” The corner of Renee’s mouth lifted slightly. “Kind of selfish of me.”
“Not at all. I’ve been wanting one for a while, and I’m glad I’ll be able to send you pictures. Jani’s going to miss her favorite aunt, so you’re going to need to send some to us too.”
Another quick smile curved Renee’s lips but it didn’t stay there for long. She looked intently at Cassie. “You’re sure?”
Cassie leaned back against the edge of the window seat and pulled her own legs up, wrapping them with her arms. She gazed out at the big tree, bursting with thick leaves. “When I first came back from Colombia six years ago I was positive I’d never set foot on the mission field again. And that feeling stayed with me until last year.”
“Until they told you that Quinn was most likely dead. That all reports they were hearing pointed to that conclusion.”
Cassie didn’t answer right away. Pain clenched her heart as it did whenever she thought of Quinn being dead. Somehow it hadn’t gotten any easier. “Yes, when they told me that, I realized I had to move forward. And just like the first time I felt the call to be a missionary, it took a missionary speaker to open my eyes again.
“Before Quinn and I got married, we both experienced a longing to serve the Lord on the mission field. That was a longing given to each of us individually, not as a couple. It became our desire as a couple once we married but still, the Lord had called us as individuals. Now I no longer have Quinn at my side but the calling is still there. I think Quinn would have wanted me to go.”
“But what if something happens to you? Or to Jani?” Cassie heard the edge of panic in Renee’s voice.
Cassie knew better than to tell her that nothing would happen. After all, something had happened. Her husband, Renee’s brother, had been taken hostage six years ago and was now presumed dead. The worst could, and had, happened.
“We have to trust the Lord, Renee. The mission is sending us to a place that has not had a lot of political strife. We’ll be living with other missionaries who work at the hospital there. But if something does happen, we’ll deal with it. Just like we dealt with what happened to Quinn.”
“I don’t want you to go,” Renee announced, her expression set.
Cassie sighed. “I know. But right now I feel like the Lord is asking me to be willing to go. And I am.”
“But how do you really know it’s His will? After all, you haven’t been able to rent your house nor has the doctor’s office been able to find someone to replace you.”
Cassie drew her brows together in a frown. Renee was right. She had been praying for both those things to happen before she left and yet neither had. But in spite of that, she still felt the Lord wanted them to prepare to leave the following week.
She glanced around the room. All but the basics, the bed and dresser, had been put into storage at Renee’s. She was also leaving some furniture in the other rooms in case someone wanted to rent a furnished house. It wasn’t a big deal since the house, which had been left to her by her parents, had been paid off. She wasn’t worried about mortgage payments but did want someone in the house while they were gone.
“Maybe you’re really not supposed to go since those two things are still up in the air.”
Cassie looked at Renee, wishing she could get her sister-in-law to understand all that was in her heart. How do you explain to someone that incredible yearning, that intense desire that could only have been placed there by God? Cassie rubbed a hand over her chest. She believed with all her heart she was doing the right thing. There was no doubt in her mind the Lord had called her to take this step.
Cassie reached out and took both Renee’s hands in her own and squeezed them. She looked into eyes so like Quinn’s and saw the grief there. Renee would never stand in the way of God’s will but right now the pain was forcing her to do things she never would have otherwise.
“I love you, Renee. You’ve been there for me so many times. Now I need you again. I need your support in this. I need your prayers. When Quinn and I first went to Colombia my dad and your parents were our strongest prayer allies. With our dads gone and your mom not able to understand anymore, I need you to step in and take up that challenge. To pray for us. We need you to do that. Will you?”
Tears spilled over and silent sobs wracked Renee’s body. Her hands clung to Cassie’s as she wept for several minutes. Finally she took a couple of deep breaths and once again met Cassie’s gaze. “Yes, I will. I’m sorry for trying t
o turn you from the path the Lord is leading you on.”
Cassie reached out and pulled Renee into a tight embrace. “No need to apologize. I know you said what you did because you’re scared… so am I.”
Renee straightened out of the embrace, wiping her hands across her cheeks. “You better email me all the time and send me lots of pictures. And we’re gonna Skype as often as we can. If you don’t I might just have to get on a plane and come see you.”
Cassie grinned. “Well, if that’s all it will take to get you to visit us—“
They shared laughter then, reinforcing the strong bond between them.
*****
The next morning Cassie glanced at the calendar on the wall as she stirred the pancake batter. Six years. In two weeks it would be six years since Quinn’s kidnapping. Even though most had given up hope of him ever coming home, a tiny part of Cassie’s heart continued to hold out hope that all the eyewitness reports had been wrong. That somehow they had lied or that Quinn had only been injured by the bullets and not killed.
She had not told anyone in the past year, not even Renee, that she believed Quinn was still alive. Cassie didn’t know why the Lord was prompting her to the mission field again while things were still not resolved with Quinn, but she was going, trusting that when Quinn was freed, he’d join her so they could once again serve the Lord together.
Setting the bowl down, Cassie flicked on the small television sitting on the counter. She bent and retrieved the electric griddle from a low cupboard and plugged it in. While waiting for the pan to heat, Cassie listened to the newscaster begin her run-through of the day’s top stories.
Once the griddle had heated, she picked up the bowl of batter and began to drizzle a scoopful onto its hot surface. The phone rang as she finished the first pancake. She set the ladle on the counter and reached for the phone. The long cord allowed her to tuck the receiver between her shoulder and ear and still pour the pancake batter.
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