by Amy Knupp
Evan held Selena’s hand as she climbed up. She thanked him once she was settled, distracted by the way it felt to have his big, calloused hand steadying her. While it made it easier to climb into the seat, it had the opposite, unsteadying effect on her composure. He held her longer than necessary, and his eyes sparked with raw desire.
No matter how hard she tried to be immune to him, she wasn’t. She so wasn’t. It didn’t matter how scared she was of getting attached. She could work herself up to a good anxiety attack in the middle of the night, alone in the dark when she lay there thinking about the potential for Evan to be in danger. But when she was this close to him, with her hand enveloped in his, it was tough to overrule what her body wanted. Watching him half-naked on the volleyball court all afternoon sure as hell hadn’t helped the cause. It was like slow, torturous foreplay.
He walked around the front of the truck and Selena tracked his every move.
“Going to storm,” he said as he got in.
The palms on the edge of the parking lot swayed. “A good night to hole up and stay inside.”
Their eyes met and there was no doubt in her mind what he’d like to do with the night.
She was torn. At the moment, she wanted the same thing he did — for tonight. But she couldn’t help being concerned about what tomorrow would bring. She wasn’t sure she could get any closer to him physically and not become tied up emotionally.
“Have you been here during a hurricane?” she asked in an attempt to get her mind off her current dilemma.
“Several times. Only one hit directly, a couple years ago. You don’t want to be here even for the near-misses, though. Unreal, like nothing you can imagine.”
“Does the fire department evacuate or do they make you stay?” Yet another concern for his safety that she hadn’t previously considered.
“Usually we evacuate, too, but we do it as late as possible. The last time one came through, the storm veered off course and there was no time to get out. The island hadn’t been evacuated. We had tourists everywhere. Giant clusterfuck.” Raindrops began spattering the windshield. “I wouldn’t want to go through it again.”
“Coming from a man who runs into fires, that’s saying a lot.”
“Fires I know how to handle. They’re unpredictable, but we’re trained to deal with that. That storm…” He shook his head and didn’t finish the thought.
“First hurricane watch and I’m out of here, camped out on the mainland somewhere. Way inland.”
“Smart.” He smiled at her.
They got to her house before she was ready, because now she had a decision to make. She watched his profile as he pulled up and stopped. He didn’t turn off the engine. It was a point in his favor that he didn’t take for granted that he was welcome inside.
Lightning flashed, and a few seconds later, thunder crashed in the distance. Selena looked at the beach house, so dark and quiet and … lonely.
“Would you like to come in?” she asked.
“You’re asking me inside?”
“Maybe I’m afraid of storms.”
“Storms can be stressful,” Evan said, his low voice hushed.
“Terribly.”
“Stress is bad for pregnant women.”
“It is.” She knew she was heading for trouble and attempted to backpedal. “We could talk. Watch TV. Play dominoes.”
He studied her. “We could do that.”
The rain came down harder, pelting the truck.
“Let’s make a run for it,” she said, then opened her door and slid out. She ran to the front of the house and dug out her keys, the overhang providing some protection from the downpour.
Evan came up beside her and held out his hand for the keys. Without hesitation, she gave them to him and he had the door open quickly, even though she’d forgotten to turn the porch light on. The setting sun had been wiped out by the clouds and dusk was falling, casting eerie shadows.
Evan walked in ahead of her, their fingers intertwined. A bright streak of lightning lit up the kitchen momentarily, and before the dark returned, a deafening clap of thunder crashed, making her jump out of her skin and cling to Evan’s back.
“See?” Selena said. “You thought I was kidding about storms.”
“That was too close. Something got hit.”
Selena let go of him and felt her way to the light switch. When she flicked it, however, nothing happened. “Something got hit, all right.”
Evan headed through the dark to the newly replaced door on the beach side. He slid the glass open so that only the screen stood between them and the storm that was picking up intensity.
“What are you doing?” Selena asked, catching up with him.
“Just going to see if I can spot anything, figure out what got zapped.”
“You’re not on duty, you know.”
He flashed her an irresistible boyish grin. “Force of habit. There could be a fire.”
“Could be.” She came up behind him and slipped her hands under his shirt. She ran her fingers up his back, marveling at the solid muscles that had mesmerized her during the volleyball game. She didn’t stop to consider what she was doing, just let her hands go, let her senses lead her on.
“Or I could stay inside,” he said quietly, turning to face her.
The wind gusted inside, noticeably cooler than it’d been a half hour ago. Selena paid it no mind. Didn’t care if it rained inside at this point.
“You could.”
His mouth came down on hers as she explored the ripples and ridges of his chest. He slid his rough hands over the sensitive skin at her waist and pulled her closer, their tongues swirling together.
Just like that, she felt the fire inside her ignite, the same way it had their first night together. She’d never experienced anything like it before she’d met him. She finally understood how people in lust lost their minds, acted out-of-character.
Evan’s hands moved to her butt and he lifted her. She wrapped her legs around him, pressing herself into him, her body aching for his.
“This is crazy,” she said between kisses as she rolled his shirt up over his chest. He carried her to the wall and pressed her lightly against it with his body so that he could raise his arms and let her remove his shirt completely.
“It’s a good crazy,” he said, his voice husky and sexy enough to make her moan her agreement. That and the things he was doing with his tongue.
Thunder rolled and crashed, but Selena was barely aware of it. She was lost in Evan’s kisses, his caresses, the magnificent feel of his solid body up against hers.
“Would you mind terribly,” he said, “if we didn’t make it to the bedroom?”
“I wouldn’t mind if we ended up on Mars.”
He made quick work of her shirt and tossed it on the floor. He unhooked her bra so easily she couldn’t help thinking he was an expert, but when he took her breast into his mouth, all thoughts slipped out of her head.
Evan carried her to the sofa and sat down with her straddling him. She pressed her breasts into his chest, drinking in the heat of his skin on hers. He lavished attention on each breast, with his lips, his tongue, his fingers, arousing an ache deep in her womb. By the time his hand trailed to her waist to unsnap her jeans, her breath was stuttering and she lifted her body to help him.
He slid her jeans off, then peeled her panties down her legs. When lightning flashed, she could see heat in his eyes, his need etched on his strained face. That she had this kind of effect on a man like Evan... She arched into him, watching every nuance on his face, exhilarated by her newfound power.
“Your body is perfect.” She barely recognized his gravelly voice.
“It won’t be in a few months,” she said with a bold smile. “Enjoy it while you can.”
“Oh, I am. But you’ll be just as beautiful when that baby is out to here.”
He held his hand in front of her now-flat belly and then slid it down between her legs, where her blood pulsed and her nerves screamed for contact.
When he touched her intimately, she nearly went through the ceiling.
“The curtains are wide open,” she realized. The sofa faced the beach, front and center, and if anyone happened by, they’d get an eyeful.
“No one’s out there. It’s still pouring.” He kissed his way up her jaw. “But if there was, they’d get the treat of a lifetime.”
Selena turned to look behind her.
“No one there, darlin’,” he said.
She raised her body enough to get at his pants and ripped the snap open. “Not fair for you to have so many clothes on,” she said into his mouth. Instead of taking his shorts off all the way, she reached inside them and grasped him, closing her eyes as he pressed himself into her palm. “Do we need protection?” she asked, noticing her own voice sounded weird.
“Why? You can’t get pregnant.”
She grinned. “The upside of unplanned pregnancy, at last.”
“I’ve been imagining for weeks how it’ll feel to be inside you with nothing between us.”
Selena held on to his shaft and directed it to her, taking him inside inch by inch.
“Yeah,” he drawled. “That’s exactly what I’ve been thinking about. You feel so good.”
She didn’t know how he was talking and made it her goal to shatter his coherence. She took her time about it, though, teasing him, making him feel every single millimeter of movement, lifting her body almost completely off his, then slowly lowering herself to take him in completely. Over and over, until he finally grasped her hips and arched into her repeatedly.
“Tease,” he said as she lost the last bits of her control and their pace became mutually frantic.
Even as she climbed, aching for release, she never wanted to be without him, like this. Then she merely felt. And loved hearing her name on his lips as she bit his shoulder and plunged over the edge, her body exploding with sensation seconds before his stiffened and he pounded upward one more time.
They didn’t move for several minutes afterward, just pressed light kisses to each other as their hearts thundered.
“Next time you don’t get to wear your shorts,” she finally said in a near whisper.
“Happy to oblige. How soon would you like the next time to be?”
She smiled into his lips. “Whenever you’re up for it.”
oOo
Evan stirred and stretched his sleep-deprived body, his eyes still shut. The light, feminine scent was the first thing that jogged his memory and brought every amazing, earth-crashing moment of the night back to him. He reached for Selena’s side of the bed but found only cool, empty sheets.
“Selena?” Maybe she was in the bathroom or making coffee. “Where are you, darlin’?”
He sat up, guessing by the complete silence she wasn’t in the house. On the patio, maybe.
He surveyed the mess they’d made of the bed — sheets and blankets twisted and heaped mostly on the floor, pillows at odd angles. Even the fitted sheet had come loose from the mattress corner, making him smile.
He strolled into the bathroom, naked as the day he was born and already throbbing for Selena. He wasn’t sure he’d ever get enough of that woman.
He splashed water on his face, then squeezed toothpaste on his finger and ran it over his teeth.
His clothes were apparently still in the living room, although putting them back on was the last thing he wanted to do. Maybe she was up in her studio, taking advantage of the early light. He climbed the two flights of stairs, thinking the leather chair in the studio would do just fine for what he had in mind.
There was no sign of her up there, though, either inside or out on the widow’s walk. He stopped short of going outside to search up and down the beach, thinking the neighbors, whoever they were, might give Selena trouble if she had a naked guy on her roof.
“Selena?” he called again, beginning to suspect maybe everything wasn’t so happy for her.
In the living room again, he pulled on his shorts and, noticing the way the wind blew the sea grass, dragged his shirt over his head before going outside. The door was unlocked, so he was fairly sure he’d find her out here somewhere.
It didn’t take long to spot her. She was a few hundred feet down the beach, about halfway between the house and the jetty at the south end of the island. Her hair blew freely behind her, and though he couldn’t see her face, he’d recognize the sway of those hips from a mile away.
He caught up with her quickly, as she meandered along, seemingly lost in thought. That didn’t bode well.
“What’s a pretty girl like you doing all alone out here?” he asked when he was just a few feet behind her.
Her shoulders jerked, and she stopped and turned.
“I didn’t mean to startle you.”
“It’s okay. I should be more aware of what’s going on around me.”
“You’re lucky I have honorable intentions.”
“Is that what you call it?” She tried to smile but it was a hollow attempt.
She’d pulled on a long, loose dress, gathered under her breasts, and thrown a denim jacket over it. Her hair was windblown, tangled, and she didn’t wear any makeup. To him, she looked perfect.
“What’s wrong, Selena?”
They started walking toward the south end of the island again, inches apart but not touching. The urge to take her hand was powerful, but she was emitting a serious don’t-touch-me vibe.
“You regretting last night?” he prompted, needing to get the bad news out in the open so he could start convincing her everything would be okay.
“No.”
He was surprised at her answer. “Good.”
She grinned shyly and he was yet again in awe of the two sides of Selena Jarboe.
“So are you going to tell me what’s bugging you? Because after a night like that, I’m thinking it’s not normal for a woman to run away.”
“I didn’t run away…”
“Not convincing.”
“Okay. I did.”
They approached a wooden boardwalk perpendicular to the beach that led to the bay side of the island. It was only a couple hundred feet north of the jetty, bisecting the southern tip of the island. Selena stepped onto it and Evan followed her lead.
“Why did you run away?”
Their bare feet thudded on the wood that was still wet from the night’s rain, with shallow puddles in some of the old, uneven slats. They were nearly halfway across the long walkway before she said a word.
“It’s never going to work between us, Evan. Not for the long term. So while last night was incredible, I’m having a hard time. I guess I don’t see what the point is. It’s only going to make it worse later.”
The relief he’d felt when she said she didn’t regret last night took a nosedive. He frowned and shook his head. “What makes you so sure things can’t work? In my book, they work pretty damn good.”
“I’m not talking about sex. That works. No question about it.”
“Then what? What the hell are you talking about? Enlighten me, darlin’, because I must be missing something.”
Chapter Sixteen
Selena focused on each wooden slat beneath her feet, a lump lodged in her throat and pressure building behind her eyes. This was where she wished with all her might that she was the kind of girl who could get involved with a man physically and keep her heart out of it. Other people did it all the time — heck, she suspected Evan did it all the time. One of her friends from home was notorious for her parade of men, and Selena knew for a fact Jill had never had her heart broken. She just … wasn’t the type. She would always be the breaker, not the breakee.
Selena had rarely been, either, but she could see it from here — much more time with Evan and she would be devastated to lose him.
When they came to the end of the boardwalk, she trekked for the large boulders along the shore. A lone fisherman sat on one of the rocks farther down, but otherwise they had the area to themselves. Selena located a relatively smooth stone and caref
ully made her way toward it. Evan sat on an adjacent rock. The scowl on his face told her plenty about how well he was receiving what she was trying to say.
This was the hard part, the part she dreaded. She wedged her elbows in her lap and leaned forward, staring at the water as it splashed against the boulders.
“My dad was FBI,” she began, then took a fortifying breath. “When I was really young, all I knew was that my dad had an important job that required him to be gone a lot. I sensed the excitement of what he did, but it wasn’t until I was in the first grade that I began to understand that every time he walked out that door, he could be risking his life. I remember so clearly how Brian Flanders skipped up to me on the playground one day and said, ‘My daddy said it’s lucky that your daddy hasn’t got shot at his work.’”
She clenched her fists, still able to hear the singsong of his voice after all these years. “I was so mad at him I yelled that he was stupid and he lied. The teacher heard me calling him stupid, so I got in trouble. That night, I went home and asked my mom about it, because my dad was out of town, and she told me Dad had an honorable job.”
“Did she level with you then?”
“When I pestered her some more, she admitted his job could be dangerous. I don’t think I was ever the same after that.”
“That’s rough. Seven years old?”
She nodded as tears flooded her eyes. “Every time he left for work, I’d hide in my mom’s bed, scared to death I’d never see my dad again.”
“What did your mom do?”
“She never said much. Just held me. Brushed my hair back. Mom things.”
“You made her sound different the other day. Something about her screwing up.”
“Back then it was different. She was different. Anyway, my point is that it was hell to live in that kind of fear, supportive family or not.”
“Is your dad still an agent?”
Selena hesitated. “He died when I was twelve. On the job.” She squeezed the words out before her throat swelled up.
Evan gently rubbed her leg. He didn’t offer any token phrases of comfort, and Selena appreciated that. She wasn’t looking for comfort — knew there was none. She was trying to make a point.