by Aiden Bates
Tessaro's face fell. "Yeah. About that. He's been real broken up since you guys decided to take a break. I mean, he doesn't smile, he doesn't laugh, nothing. Doesn't say nothing about the baby, neither."
"Probably because he'd rather that the father of his child not pretend to be a detective." Ryan glowered.
"It's not like that. I mean, maybe it was, but he's been made to see the error of his ways. Just—just don't cut off your nose to spite your face, okay? Come along on the takedown. That's all I'm asking." Tessaro leaned in, eyes wide and sincere.
Ryan's lip curled. "I'd consider it, if that omega-phobic alpha came down here and asked me himself."
Tessaro grinned and shrugged, stepping back. "It's a start. I'll take it."
***
Nick went to Thanksgiving at his parents' place. He went alone. His parents hadn't extended an invitation to Ryan, which was good. At the time, he'd been a little put off by the omission, but they'd met him exactly once. He'd figured it wasn't normal to bring a guy to family Thanksgiving after they'd been together for less than a month.
When he showed up, they didn't say anything, and he figured that he was going to be spared any reminders of what had happened. That could only be good. He hadn't even finished processing it yet. The shock of loss hadn't even passed him by, never mind given him a chance to mourn yet.
He should have known that he wasn't going to get away that cleanly. "So, Nick," his mother began, "who does Ryan usually celebrate Thanksgiving with?"
"Um, Ryan's not a big holiday guy." That should get him out of this, right?
Not so much. His parents both put their forks down and exchanged glances, while Danny nudged him with his knee. "Dude. Nobody gets to be not a big holiday guy. It's not like Thanksgiving is a religious holiday. They can make turkey pho, or whatever."
Nick squirmed in his seat. "Ryan doesn't have a family," he said after a moment. "They put him into foster care after his tests came back and showed he was an omega. He never got adopted, so he doesn't really have any place to go."
Everyone at the table was staring at him now. "So what, you just left the father of your child sitting at home alone on Thanksgiving like some kind of jerk? You should have said something. We'd have invited him too." His father pointed at Nick. "You're making us look bad, son."
Nick slouched in his chair. He could just see Ryan, sitting back in his condo at the breakfast bar. He hoped he was eating right; Ryan was carrying Nick's baby. He needed to take care of both of them now, even though he freely admitted that cooking for one was a chore.
"Um, I don't think he'd have come anyway. We broke up."
Someone dropped a fork. It was the only sound in the room.
"Tell me you're joking." His mother's voice was barely above a whisper.
"We had a fight about the case. I wasn't impressed by the way he went about things, and I let him know. It had come up a few times before, and I was kind of pissed off about some other things, and I guess I lashed out. Well, as it turns out he still had some resentments from when our case first started. He decided that I didn't respect him as an investigator or as a professional." He glared, even though Ryan wasn't there, and gripped his utensils a little tighter. "It's not true, but I guess I can see where he got that impression."
His mother closed her eyes and shook her head. "You had a fight. How did this go from a fight to my grandchild not knowing their cousins, and me not getting to hold them?"
Nick looked around at the huge table, full of accusing eyes. "I kind of kicked him off the case. Which, as it turns out, I had no authority to do. Stuff happened, we went our separate ways, more stuff happened. We had yet another fight. I told him that we needed to not see one another until the case wrapped up, because we got too angry." He took a deep breath. He felt like he was in confession, with a whole panel of very hostile clergy. Weren't these supposed to be his family? "And he said that he couldn't be with someone who didn't respect him. And that was it. He had his boss drop off my suits when she came by to ream out my boss for my behavior."
"So let me get this straight." His mother folded her hands in her lap and bowed her head. "That sweet young man is at home alone on a holiday, unloved and pregnant, because you couldn't manage to treat him like an actual colleague?"
Nick stood up so fast that his chair fell over. "Why does everyone think it was like that? Oh my God! You're making him out to be some kind of martyr or saint or something when he was cozying up to a goddamn killer! He never even tried to distance himself from the case and for crying out loud, it's not like he wanted to be there in the first place! And oh yeah, he's the one who left."
His father stood up, eyes stony. "Sit down and eat your dinner, Nick. Sure, he's the one who left. And you're the one who chased him out. Own your crap, son. Don't worry about his. You were willing enough to introduce us, so you must have cared about him to some extent."
Nick gaped. "How can you even say that? I loved him!"
"Not if you made him feel as though you didn't respect him as a professional, you didn't." Vinnie reached across him for the mashed potatoes, and people started moving again. "You seriously threw him off a case? You don't get to throw your partner off a case, buddy. That's not how it works."
All around him, his family started to eat again, all except for his mother. She got up and walked into the kitchen, emerging with a stack of Tupperware dishes that she reached in between various people to fill. "You might not care if Ryan does anything for Thanksgiving or not, but he is a dear and sweet boy and he's carrying my grandchild. Now tell me where he lives."
Nick sighed and texted his mother the address. "I'd try the station first," he told her. "It's where I would go if I were in a snit about something."
She collected her Tupperware and headed out. Her back was ramrod straight and her head held high. Vinnie's wife followed her, dropping a quick kiss on her husband's cheek as she ran.
Nick didn't stick around for dessert.
He went into the office the next day. So far, trying to find Will O'Neal had been an exercise in futility. They had troopers and Boston cops crawling all over Southie looking for the guy, but there was no sign of him. It would have been helpful to have a partner, but Ryan had been right about one thing. There was a reason that Nick had to work alone. He'd never worked well with other people.
Pat Tessaro came over to his desk with a big wide grin on his face. "So. We've got the bat back from the lab, and it's confirmed that it's the murder weapon for Maureen O'Neal."
"Hi, Nick. How was your Thanksgiving? Mine was fine, Pat, thanks for asking. How was yours? It was fabulous, Nick. You should have seen the array of handsome omegas available and eager at my local drinking establishment." Nick rolled his eyes. "Dude, you told me about the bat on Wednesday. About five minutes before you tried to get me back together with Ryan."
"Okay." Pat held his hands up. "Sorry. Long night with the bevy of handsome omegas available and eager at my local drinking establishment." He snorted. "I see you're in an awesome mood. You know, you were much more pleasant company when you and Ryan were together."
"Yeah, well, sorry to disappoint." Seriously, did no one care about a broken heart?
"You're not the first, and certainly not the last. Meanwhile, I have news that will surprise and delight even your miserable little soul, Nick." He smirked. "We've got a lead on Will O'Neal."
Nick jumped up from his seat. "Are you for real?"
"Last time I checked. Listen. We've got a bunch of guys ready to go. Are you ready to bring this dirtbag in?"
Nick was already putting his coat on. "Are you kidding? I will be so ready to put this case behind me. And hey, maybe we can do this one without Ryan getting all touchy-feely with the suspect, right?"
Pat stopped in mid stride and turned around. "Are you kidding me right now? I mean, this is your literal last chance to make things right with Ryan. You get that right?"
Nick growled. He could feel the eyes of the rest of the department on th
em, but he didn't care right now. "That doesn't concern you."
"The hell it doesn't, man. I mean for one thing, I like Ryan. I think the guy's an awesome detective, and I think we could be friends. For another, I think you totally threw something away there that should have been special. He worked damn hard on this case, and for you to deny him being part of the takedown, and giving him the solve, is a total dick move that I wouldn't even expect of Nenci never mind you."
"Hey!" Nenci objected, from his desk.
"Shut it, Nenci." Pat held up a hand. "You're a dick and you know it. But Nick, the main reason that I'm interfering right here and right now is that I've been there. I lost someone because I couldn't get my head out of my ass and put my own ego aside, and you know what? I'm not over it. There wasn't even a baby involved, and I'm not over it. I'll never get over it." He loomed into Nick's space, eyes blazing with intensity. "Don't be me, okay? Just… do everything in your power to keep that man in your life and actually know your kid."
"He's not going to take me back, Pat." Nick turned away. "He hates me, and I'm not sure that I want him to come back. He's determined to think the worst, and I mean he's not even excited about the baby!"
"How could he be? He knows you have nothing but contempt for him. You've been showing it. Go show him that you want him around, and that you respect him." Pat put a hand on his shoulder. "He'll at least come along for the arrest. He told me that he would, if you were the one that asked."
Nick considered. He didn't want to do this. Doing this would mean admitting that he'd been wrong, or at least partially wrong. At the same time, he had to admit that he hated the thought of letting Ryan go without a fight. "Fine," he said. "I'll invite him, but if he's not ready to go right now we're moving without him. We can't afford to sleep on this."
Pat stepped back and let Nick out.
Nick headed down to Abused Persons. Ryan was there, talking with an intense-looking uniformed trooper. Ryan looked calm and unperturbed, and as Nick watched the angry trooper's face got less and less red. After a few moments, they were both smiling, and Ryan shook the trooper's hand.
A wave of nostalgia washed over Nick. He didn't know what had just happened, but he missed Ryan. Ryan had a way about him, sometimes. He could be a combative, sarcastic little weasel, but he was also an endlessly compassionate and gentle man who could make anyone feel like they were the only person in the world. Nick had been important to him once, and it had been like being important to the sun.
He stepped forward, drawing Ryan's attention. Ryan froze in place, and the formerly irate trooper got in between them. "Is there some kind of problem here?" the trooper asked, looking between them.
"No. No problem." Nick reached, very slowly, for his badge. "Detective Tran and I worked a case together recently. I was just coming down here to ask him if he might want to come along to make the arrest."
Ryan's eyes bulged in his head. "You actually want me there?"
"I actually want you there." Nick stuck his hands in his pockets. "I mean, it's not like we'd have solved anything without you or anything. And it's not like we wouldn't have found the guy on Tuesday if you weren't working the case." He took a deep breath to fortify himself. "And honestly, I didn't have the right to put you off the case. They put you on the case so that I could learn from you, not so that you could sit at the feet of the master or something. And I'm sorry."
Ryan's eyes shone. It was the fluorescent lights reflecting off of tears in his eyes. He didn't let them fall, though. "I… okay. I'm not sure what to say to that, but I'll come bust the suspect with you. I won't be sorry to see this through to the end."
Nick relaxed, at least marginally. The uniformed trooper shook hands with Ryan again and they parted ways, and then Nick and Ryan marched toward the motor pool.
They took an unmarked Interceptor. Nick drove, as usual, but this time he drove in the middle of a good-sized fleet of vehicles heading toward East Boston. The cabin wasn't huge, and being in an enclosed space with Ryan's overwhelming scent was maddening. They hadn't been apart for very long, but it felt like a lifetime, and of course Nick couldn't reach out and touch.
"So how'd you find him?" Ryan only spoke after about ten minutes of driving. His voice sounded strained, and he stared straight ahead, but he kept his cool.
"I'm not sure. Pat told me that they got the lead." Nick clenched the steering wheel. "Did my mom find you?"
"Yeah. She stopped by the office, her and Amanda. That was real nice of her." He tugged at his collar. "I was a little confused."
"Everyone was kind of pissed when I told them what happened."
Ryan scratched his head. "So why'd she come by then?"
"Pissed at me." Nick pressed his lips together. "So. Promotion, huh?"
"Yeah. Well, apparently it's what they wanted to do all along. They just wanted to see if I could stand up to alphas." He squirmed.
"You can." Nick found himself grinning in spite of himself. "I will very happily give you a reference on that account."
The joke relieved some of the tension, and they rode in to East Boston with a little less anxiety between them.
Chapter Fifteen
Ryan hated how normal and how alien this ride felt. He couldn't understand how normal riding with Nick had become in such a short period of time. They truly hadn't known one another very long, and yet sitting beside him in this car and breathing his scent had become his normal. Everything in him wanted to relax, to accept this as his home.
But he couldn't. Nick had apologized for some of his behavior. He hadn't apologized for all of it, and he wasn't going to. Ryan had known this would be his position going in, too. Ryan had also known that Nick would never really respect him. Had he been looking for problems? Maybe. Had he been self-sabotaging? Probably.
Of course, there was a more immediate reason that he couldn't relax, too. They were going into East Boston to take down a dangerous criminal, one who was almost certainly armed. Letting their guard down now would be more than unprofessional. It could be fatal.
They pulled up in front of the old triple decker where their contact said that O'Neal was hiding. Neither the troopers nor the Boston police made any attempt to hide their presence. They surrounded the house. They didn't want O'Neal to decide to go out in a blaze of glory, but they didn't want him sneaking out a back door either.
Privately, Ryan was pretty sure that the last thing O'Neal had any intention of doing was taking himself out. He wasn't that kind of guy. He was destructive, but his destruction had an external focus rather than an internal one. He was more likely to try to take out cops on his way out than to try to hurt himself. The most likely scenario was an escape attempt, since he truly believed that everything he did was justified.
Nick took point and walked into the house. Troopers cleared the basement, but Ryan hadn’t expected they'd find him there. Their informant, he'd learned via text from Tessaro, had told him that their quarry was hiding out on the top floor of the old house. They would search the other apartments but they would focus their search on the top floor.
The resident of the first apartment balked at letting them in, but they had a warrant. There was nothing that the older, grizzled man could really do about it.
Ryan and Nick eased their way into the apartment. Every muscle in Ryan's body was wound tight. He could hear the running of the refrigerator and the buzz of the CFL bulbs in their sockets. The scent of stale cigarettes and day-old pizza couldn't quite drown out the intoxicating scent of his alpha, still too far for him to touch. Not that he could anyway, he reminded himself.
He stepped a little farther inside, moving toward the kitchen. The slight creak of the pantry door was his only warning before O'Neal charged out of the storage space. He waved yet another baseball bat—aluminum, just like the one he'd used on Leanne—and swung it at Ryan's head.
Ryan reacted before he could think. He stepped aside, moving out of the way of the bat, and grabbed O'Neal's wrist. He slammed his hand down
on O'Neal's elbow, eliciting a howl of pain and dropping him to the floor. Once he was on the floor, Ryan put a foot on his neck while Nick dove onto the suspect. "In here!" Ryan barked to the rest of the team.
"This is police brutality!" O'Neal wailed. Tears streamed from his eyes.
Ryan looked down at him. "You tried to hit me in the head with a baseball bat." He curled his lip. "What is it with the baseball bats with you, man? Is it a phallic thing? Are you compensating for something?"
Nick's face had been a mask of rage, but now he looked up at Ryan in shock. "For real? You're making dick jokes?" He sputtered out a laugh.
Troopers ran up into the apartment to take rough custody of the prisoner. Due to his violent history, he was going to be brought to Cedar Junction rather than housed in a holding cell for any length of time. That had been predetermined; he was already a flight risk who had taken his violent impulses out on his ex-wife.