Warmth flooded my heart. Dylan. He’d chosen the stones with care, alternating white with black and beige. I was crushed to have missed him. It was ironic that just as I’d met a boy on the island who I wanted to spend time with, not only did he not live here, I planned to leave him in five days.
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
For the next few nights, it became a routine. Dylan and I met at the chicken coop and explored the island by dark. I shared stuff about myself, even things I’d never confided to Ethan and Chloe. He described life in the Outlands. The Outlands sounded nothing like what everyone said, but they were no paradise either. I was astonished at the variety of customs. People were continually being entertained. And my island life fascinated Dylan, even the aspects I found mundane: our self-sufficiency, the many talents we’d cultivated and shared.
And something changed. The longer I spent with Dylan, the less I thought of leaving. As long as we were together, it didn’t matter. But I had to get serious. Once they fixed the plane, Dylan would leave. He’d never said he wanted to stay, and even if he did (I know, wishful thinking), Mayor Marlow would not allow it. And his father wouldn’t either. But the ship would pass in two days and I still hadn’t loaned Merma the scroll.
One thing Dylan and I never discussed was the future. I was afraid to bring it up. Did he see us having one? Or was I simply an exotic romance. Once I made it to the ship, how would I find Dylan in the Outlands? Many questions, no answers, much easier to enjoy our time together and wait for another day.
I arrived at Assembly late. My night rendezvous with Dylan were taking their toll. I knew this for a fact because I didn’t get in trouble. After Assembly Mrs. Caroline took me aside and looked in my eyes.
“You helped Kassandra all morning?” she asked.
“I’ve been helping her with the inventory. It’s my punishment.” Then I held my breath. I hadn’t lied, but neither had I answered her question. If she’d spoken with Kassandra, she’d realize that I left with plenty of time to make the last of the morning session. Instead I'd taken a nap in the sun near the old runway. She looked at me for a long moment but nodded.
“You look exhausted,” she said. And grumpy, annoying Mrs. Caroline sounded concerned. It gave me a lump in my throat. “Get rest tonight, okay? Go to bed early.”
“Okay, yes I will. I’ll be fine,” I said.
* * *
When I got home, I found that old Scraps had somehow escaped our yard.
“Scraps!” I called again. “Scraps!”
“He’s an old dog, can’t have gone too far,” Dad said as he patched the fence that Scraps had dug under. I followed the trail of mud as best I could. It headed along the rocks and then disappeared into vegetation that followed a steep slope to the water.
“I hope he didn’t fall,” I said.
As I searched through the brush and scrub, Ethan called out from above.
“Hey!” he said. “What are you doing?”
“Hi! Scraps went missing,” I called out, happy to see him. “I thought you guys ditched me after The Binding. I’ve been wanting to talk.” I said as I walked up the ridge to him.
“Oh yeah, what about?”
Part of me wanted to tell him I was leaving in two days. But something stopped me.
“Daniel,” I said instead.
He raised his eyebrows but remained silent. I didn't know how much to share. Eventually I told him everything except for my reason for snooping around Mayor Marlow’s house.
“So don’t you think that’s strange?” I said. Ethan just looked at me.
“No,” he said. “He probably had more than one shirt.”
“Well, I wondered the same but—”
“Chloe tells me you’ve been busy,” he interrupted.
I wasn’t sure what Chloe said. “I can’t find Scraps. He got out through a fence hole. Seen him?”
Ethan shook his head in irritation. “You already told me that. Guess you’re eager to find your dog…before you leave.”
“Chloe told you?”
“Yeah, she said you swore her to secrecy but figured you'd be okay with telling me.” I did mind, but too late now.
“Would it have been that wretched?” he said, big forced smile on his face.
“Would what have been wretched?”
“Us being bound. You’d rather be bound to Ben…or just leave,” he gave a harsh laugh I’d never heard him make and picked a piece of dirt out from between his thumbnail, flicking it to the rocks. I thought of the boat. Someone had come and destroyed it. One person I’d never suspected had been Ethan. Now I wondered.
“Ethan, of course not…don’t be nuts.”
“Well…”
“I mean how did you feel when Mayor Marlow called our names?” I asked. “I’m sure you were surprised too. And upset. I know you wanted to be with Chloe.” But staring into his face, strong jaw tightly clenched, I read that the truth was not simple.
“Am I that unattractive? Or maybe it’s me in general?” Ethan asked.
“No…you’re very handsome.” With his blond eyelashes and sparkling blue eyes with eyebrows like two questions, he was the boy I found most attractive on the island…save for Dylan.
“But no one measured up to Daniel, right?”
“Daniel’s been dead a long time, Ethan. We were young. And you were with Chloe,” I reminded him.
“Eventually, yeah. At first when I flirted with her, I hoped to make you jealous.”
I let out a sharp breath of air. “What? Why do that? Poor Chloe.”
“I don’t feel so good about it either. But it’s complicated. It’s not like I didn’t have feelings for her. I did then. And I do now.”
“But you’re like my brother.”
“How?”
“I don’t know. That’s just…how it is. I thought that’s how you wanted it! You called me ’sis….you started that.”
“A joke. I called Chloe sis too, remember?” Ethan picked up a stone and threw it as hard as he could toward the ocean. “You know the problem with you, Marei? You can’t see any further than your own damn nose. Everything isn’t always how it looks. There’s a whole lot going on around you that you’re missing,” he said blinking away tears.
“So you don’t love Chloe?”
“Of course I love her! But I fell in love with you when we were thirteen and I've struggled ever since. The morning we found your dead gull, I tried to tell you. But, I didn’t have the guts, and it felt like the wrong time. And then we had to put in a name…well guess who’s name I put?”
“Mine,” I whispered, allowing it to sink in.
Ethan nodded, tears ran down into the stubble on his jaw. “Damn right. And who did you put in for?”
“I—”
“C’mon tell me, it ain’t bad luck now! Who?” he shouted.
“No one…”
“No one!” Ethan’s face turned red. “You didn’t put anyone’s name?” he shook his head and laughed. “It probably never even occurred to you to put in for me.” True. The only boy who flashed through my mind was Daniel, long gone. And the boy from the passing ship who looked vaguely like Daniel.
“You’re not being fair. You’re like my brother…”
“But I’m not your brother!” he shouted. And he grabbed me and kissed me hard on the mouth. I broke away, gasping. A flood of feelings I’d shoved away coursed through me. I covered my mouth and sobbed.
“I’m sorry, Ethan, I’m sorry…”
“The day that Daniel drowned, guess what him and I were doing? Guess what I left out when I told everyone what happened?”
I covered my ears. “I don’t want to hear this.”
Grabbing my arms he forced my hands down. “Competing for you. Don’t tell me you didn’t know!”
“No. I didn’t, I swear,” I lied.
“You encouraged it. Flirting with him one day, then flirting with me the next. Teasing us both until we were half crazed. Serenading us with that wild song. You nev
er knew what you wanted, did you?” Ethan was right, there was a whole world going on around me I’d chosen to overlook.
Spitting in the dirt in disgust, he spun and ran up the hill. He turned back at the top, balanced on a rock with one foot. A sudden ocean wind pulled and yanked his hair into a crazy mess and he shook it out of his eyes angrily. He looked handsome and proud, standing silhouetted against a bruised sky. The beautiful stone with a hole in its center that we traded long ago hung against his broad chest. A pang of fear pierced my heart. I wondered if I’d made a horrible mistake.
“You know what, Marei,” he panted. “You did me a favor. I wouldn’t wish you on my worst enemy! You and that crazy Outland kid deserve each other. He might look like Daniel, but he’s not Daniel! One day you’ll wake up!”
And he left. I clutched my arms around my stomach, folded over and scrunched my eyes shut. But I couldn’t stop the thoughts, they wouldn’t go away. Dylan did look a bit like an older version of Daniel. Ethan was right. Wiping away tears I touched smooth luck rock three more times, but with little conviction.
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
Weather on the island took a dismal turn the following day and Scraps was still missing. I’d searched everywhere. A steady rain fell straight from the sky. Raindrops danced off rocks and rattled palm fronds. We huddled in Assembly with the shutters closed, door opened several feet for ventilation. There would be no outdoor practice today. Giant drops bounced off the concrete into the room forming a puddle in the entrance.
Mrs. Caroline stood with Mayor Marlow. They talked about what the new living arrangements would be after each couple’s visit to Honeymoon Island. Ethan would move in with Chloe’s family. Their house was large, and an extra room was planned to accommodate Carlson and Tricia. My parents had little space at the lighthouse, so I'd move in with Ben and his parents. For most of the pairings, Mayor Marlow gave the information matter-of-factly, but for Ben and me, he took a long, hard look. Perhaps trying to gauge how much trouble existed in our non-paradise.
Ben looked at me, eyebrows raised. I felt him wonder what my plans were. It would have been nice to reassure him, but I looked away. After my encounter with Merma, her offer seemed like an option. And yet, something held me back. Mom wouldn’t let me take the scroll that I knew. Which meant I had to…borrow it. So far I hadn’t had the guts, and I was running out of time. The ship would pass tomorrow. If only there were a simpler solution.
After Assembly, the torrential rain continued. Most of the kids huddled beneath the overhang, water splashing against their ankles, waiting for it to subside. But I didn't have the leisure to wait for better weather. I needed to let Merma have a peek at the scroll somehow. Mainly though, I wanted to stop by the docks in the hopes of seeing Dylan, even if we couldn’t speak. Poncho pulled tight, I stepped into the deluge and was at once drenched. There was no point in running. These giant drops were inescapable. I trudged downward.
“Marei!” Chloe called. She grabbed my arm, rivers of rain poured from her green poncho. After my encounter with Ethan seeing her worried me. I knew he wouldn’t have told Chloe anything. Well, I sure hoped not. But I felt concerned for her. I hoped they were happy. In fact, she glowed.
“They’ve set our date for Honeymoon Island!” she said with excitement. “Wednesday next week. Have they set yours?”
“Friday,” I said. “In two days.”
“That’s so soon! Are you still planning to leave?” she whispered. The rainfall made conversation difficult. Chloe grabbed my hand, and we ran across the island through the puddles. We ended up at Pelican Rock in our cave. We stripped off our ponchos and wet clothes and draped a sleeping bag around our shoulders. For several minutes we enjoyed each other’s presence, safe from the torrent.
My thoughts kept getting all jumbled, and it was difficult, but I told her about the mermaid.
“You can’t trust it!” she said. “No, not a mermaid. They’re pure evil. Haven’t you paid any attention to what Marlow taught us in Assembly?”
“It’s a she,” I said. “She doesn’t seem evil…just sad.”
Then I told her about Dylan. The sweet note he’d left scrawled for me in the sand, his odd manner of speech, how we’d been sneaking out and meeting every night.
“You’re in love,” she said and grabbed my hand, but in sympathy as if I’d informed her I had an incurable disease. Perhaps I did.
“And the ship passes tomorrow,” I explained. “But Dylan’s here on the island. The only way I can be with him is to leave, just as we’re growing closer. And I know nothing about the Outlands.”
“That ship might go anywhere!” Chloe said. “And Mayor Marlow said this rain is just the start. A low-pressure system is coming and you could get caught in it. What then?”
“I don’t know,” I admitted.
“No forget this scroll business and the mermaid. And what happens once you’re in the Outlands? Do you even know where Dylan lives? You might never find each other! You don’t know anyone there.”
“I’m still trying to figure it out,” I admitted.
“Here’s what you should do. Go with Dylan when they leave tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow?” Dylan hadn’t mentioned this. “They leave tomorrow?”
“Carlson said the plane is fixed.”
Leaning back against the rock I put my head against Chloe’s. A sad feeling washed through my body. “People keep telling me that. But Mayor Marlow, my parents, Dylan’s dad...none of them would allow it. And Dylan’s never mentioned it once…”
Now Dylan and I knew each other better and still he hadn't asked me to leave with him. Nor had he told me that he was leaving tomorrow. Tomorrow! Although I hadn't spilled my plans either.
“Anyway, I thought you didn’t want me to leave?” I said. “Now you can’t wait to get rid of me.” My voice grew tense. I wondered if she’d intuited Ethan’s feelings. Her jealousy the other day made sense. Once again, I felt foolish for not noticing earlier. My fingers touched the cave wall and traced along the rough initials the four of us carved long ago. It seemed an easier, much more care free time.
“Of course I don’t want you to leave. But I’d do anything for love. To help true love,” she said with a gentle kiss on my cheek. It was so tender my eyes stung.
“There’s not much to be done,” I said. “I don’t have many options left. Maybe I’ll stay. It’s my punishment…for Daniel.”
“No, stop it, Marei.”
Now I was sorry to have mentioned it. The truth veered close to territory that needed to remain unspoken. Chloe sighed.
“Ethan told me everything. How he and Daniel competed over you.”
“He did? What else did Ethan say?” I asked as I drew the sleeping bag around me tighter. Outside, the rain continued to drive hard, pouring off the rock overhang at the cave entry like a misty, silver curtain.
“That he had a crush on you for a long time. And…” she bit her lip. “That he put in for you. Your talk yesterday.”
“Chloe, please understand that—,” I started but hesitated not knowing how to continue. Instead I hugged her.
She wiped away tears. “I was shocked, furious. But you know what? I was also relieved. I mean I already guessed. This horrible black cloud had hung around for a while. Why do you think I was so insecure before The Binding?”
“You knew?” I asked. It made me wonder how her and I were different. It seemed I was oblivious to these emotional nuances.
“Of course, I sensed it. Ethan struggled against those feelings, but it was obvious.”
“So you guys are okay?”
“Gosh, we really had it out,” she said. “We fought like I’ve never fought with anyone my entire life,” her voice broke. “For a spell I considered leaving with you. But it helped us realize something. That we do both love each other. And we understand each other now. There are no secrets. I’m still sad he wasn’t honest with me. I mean just honest. Sometimes we have feelings we can’t help, I know that. Bu
t I wish he'd have told me.”
“I would have been scared too if I were him.”
Chloe burst out laughing. “You’re right, me too! Ah, oh well. But, things are better now. Our connection is strong, stronger than ever.”
“I’m happy for you guys,” I said taking her face in my hands. “If I ever get off this island…I will miss you greatly. In fact, it makes me want to stay.”
“Well, I don’t want you to lose your love or stuck here with Ben…we've got to figure out something. And that’s one reason I wanted to talk to you. It’s definitely a Plan B…”
“As long as it doesn’t involve drinking anything,” I said. Chloe smacked me on the shoulder.
“I guess I deserved that,” she said. “Well, do you want to hear Plan B or not?”
“Well, I've got no Plan A…nothing certain.”
“Okay, my mom sends a huge crate to the Outlands once a year. It’s full of foam padding and nothing else. She uses it for her medicines and equipment, anything breakable for the return trip. The crate would be tight for me…but you’re shorter. You’d need Dylan’s cooperation. But he’ll be helping to load, anyway. And Ben too, right?”
“Ben always helps out.”
“They’d need to keep everyone away. The box will be heavier than it should and you don’t want to get tossed around. Could you convince Ben?”
I laughed. “Convince him to put me in a box and ship me away? Absolutely.” I considered divulging his secret, but it didn’t seem right with Carlson being Chloe’s brother. Knowing Chloe, she probably already knew.
As I thought it over, I liked her idea more and more. I didn't know a soul in the Outlands. It was foolhardy for me to try get picked up by a ship and head off for a destination unknown. They used money in the Outlands of which I had none. This plan made much more sense. And I was guaranteed to be with Dylan. A thrill of optimism buzzed through me.
“Yes! This sounds good.”
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