by Bobbi Smith
"Who would ever have thought that things could get so complicated?" Marc said with a grin. "The good news is that congratulations are in order. You're going to be a father! I think this deserves a toast."
"Save the celebrating until I find her and bring her home. I'm in no mood today."
"You should be," Claire told him. "You've just admitted for the first time out loud that you love Brandy. I hope you find her and soon."
"So do I."
"Where are you going to look next?" Marc asked.
"I'm going to find her friend Ben. If anyone knows where she and her mother have gone, it's Ben."
"Good luck, and if you need any help, just let me know," Marc told him.
Marc and Claire walked Rafe outside and watched until he'd ridden away.
"I hope he finds her soon," Claire said softly, thinking of the pain both Rafe and Brandy were enduring, separated by a sea of misunderstandings, each not knowing the other's feelings. "I know how terrible it can be to love someone and lose him."
Marc had never heard Claire talk this way before, and he glanced over at her to see the strained look on her face. He had lost Jennette, so he knew how painful it could be, but he'd never thought Claire had lost anyone. They had never talked about the loves in her life. "You sound like you know firsthand what it's like to lose a loved one."
"Oh, yes," she said with a brittle laugh. "It's a terrible thing when someone dies as Jennette did, but it's also a terrible thing to lose someone you love be cause of a misunderstanding or simply because they didn't know how you felt."
Marc thought about Rafe and Brandy. "If they'd just been more honest from the start. If they'd just told each other the truth, they could have avoided all this heartbreak and been happy."
Claire couldn't believe what Marc was saying. She looked at him and found his gaze upon her. In that moment, she knew she could no longer hide her feelings for him. She had waited all these months and years. She'd been patient, hoping that he would see the truth of her feelings for him and come to her, but it hadn't happened. And now she realized there would never be a better time. With all the nerve that Brandy had taught her, she decided to forge ahead. She had absolutely nothing to lose and everything to gain.
"Marc?" Her gaze searched his for a hint that he knew what was coming and felt the same way she did, but she found nothing in the depths of his eyes but gentleness and understanding.
"Yes?"
"I've been wanting to say this for a long time, but I've been afraid...."
"What is it?"
"Marc, I love you. I always have and I always will."
Silence reigned as they stood on the veranda staring at each other.
Claire feared immediately that she had ruined everything. In that instant of silence, she prayed fervently that she could take back her every word and plead temporary insanity, but there was no going back.
"You love me?" he repeated, dumbfounded.
"Oh, yes, and I have for years. Even before you met and married Jennette. Why do you think I took the job with Brandy so quickly? Why do you think I agreed to tutor Merrie and Jason? I did it so I could be near you."
"Claire, I..."
"I know," she said wearily, all the fight suddenly going out of her. She had played her hand, and she had lost. She should have remembered that she wasn't that good at poker. She was contrite for having embarrassed him, and she was glad that there had been no one else around to overhear. "I'm sorry. I never meant to embarrass you. It's just that, after listening to Rafe's sad story about Brandy, I couldn't go on pretending anymore. I wanted the truth to be out between us. I love you. I have for a long time, and I'm not ashamed of it."
With all the dignity she could muster, Claire turned and started to walk away.
But Marc, too, had been goaded to reality by Rafe's tale of woe. In two steps, he was beside her, touching her arm to stop her progress away from him.
"I hadn't realized until just now how special our relationship is. If we're going to have confessions here, I want to tell you that I offered you the job with the children because I couldn't bear the thought of your going back to St. Louis. I didn't recognize it for what it was then. I guess I still hadn't recovered enough from Jennette's death to say the word `love' then, but Claire...I can now."
"Oh, Marc..." Her heart was in her eyes as she looked up at him. She was trembling with excitement as she realized that he cared for her.
"I love you, too, Claire."
He drew her close and his lips sought hers in a sweet, possessive exchange that left them both breathless. They drew apart, realizing that it was broad daylight and anyone might be watching.
"Will you marry me, Claire?"
"Yes, yes! Oh, yes!" she cried, launching herself back into his arms.
They kissed again, and then forced themselves to maintain some semblance of dignity.
"We'll be married as soon as possible. Is that all right with you?" Marc asked, loving the feeling of having her in his arms, not wanting to let her go.
"Tonight?" Claire asked with a laugh of pure happiness.
"If only we could," he growled, unable to resist stealing another kiss. "I'll send word to the priest right away."
They shared an adoring look for a moment, but then Claire turned serious as thoughts of Brandy intruded. "I only hope Rafe isn't too late to save his marriage to Brandy. She's a proud woman, but they're so perfect for each other."
"It will work out," Marc reassured her. "When Rafe sets his mind to getting something, he gets it, and he loves Brandy very much."
"I hope you're right. They deserve all the happiness they can get."
"Just like us," Marc added.
Claire looked up at him, all the love she had for him shining in her eyes. "Just like us."
"Shall we go tell Merrie and Jason?"
She knew a moment of uncertainty. "Do you think they'll be happy? They loved their mother very much."
"Yes, they did, but you're not trying to erase Jennette's memory. You're going to build on that and create new memories for them and new love."
"Just as I will with you," she said softly as she lifted a hand to caress his cheek. "I want to make you smile again, Marc LeFevre. I want to make your life heaven on Earth."
He was deeply touched by her words, and he gathered her to him once more. She had brought sunshine to his darkest days, laughter to his home and love back into his heart. "You already have, Claire."
Rafe was a man on a mission as he rode for town. He was looking for Ben Rodgers of the Pride, and he wasn't going to stop until he'd found him. He went straight to the shipping office and learned that the steamboat would be back in Natchez in a week. He was outraged that he would have to wait that long to speak to the man, but he knew there were other things he could do in the meantime. He checked at the various shipping offices to see if there was a record of Brandy and her mother leaving, but their names did not appear on any of the passenger lists. Frustrated, but not defeated, Rafe prepared to wait for Ben's return. He was going to find Brandy and bring her home where she belonged. Nothing would stop him.
The week passed slowly for Rafe, but when the day finally arrived that the Pride was due in port, he was in town early in the morning, more than ready for the confrontation.
The minute the gangplank had been lowered, Rafe boarded the ship and sought out the captain.
Ben was on the top deck and saw Rafe board the ship. He had known this moment was coming, and he was glad that Brandy was already safely settled in her new home with her mother. She was as happy as she could be considering her circumstances, and he intended for her to stay that way. He had promised her he would keep her new location secret.
"Rodgers, I want to talk to you," Rafe called out as he reached the deck to see the captain walking the other way, his back to him.
Ben stopped and turned to face him. His expression was stony, his regard condemning. "What do you want, Marchand?" He spoke with utter disdain, as if it pained him to talk to the other man.
"I want my wife back. Where is she?" Rafe demanded as he closed the distance between them, coming to stand before Ben.
"Sorry, I can't help you."
"Like hell you can't! You're the one she'd run to if she wanted to get away now where is she? I want to take her home."
Ben could barely control his temper. "I don't suppose it occurred to you that she doesn't want to `go home,' and that's why she's gone?"
"Where is she, Rodgers?"
"Marchand, you're in no position to demand anything of me," Ben sneered, disliking Rafe intensely for the pain he'd caused Brandy. This man had forced her into a loveless marriage and then had bartered her child to pay a gambling debt. Ben thought he was a lowlife, and he itched to set him straight.
"I'm going to find her."
"She doesn't want to be found not by you. So leave it alone. Brandy's started a new life, and it's one without you. And she's happy."
Ben's honest words lashed at Rafe, striking his every vulnerability.
"She's my wife."
"Then you should have treated her like one. If I'd known the terms of your marriage in the beginning, the wedding would never have taken place. You are one cold bastard. It's a good thing you weren't here when she told me. I might have-" Ben's blood was boiling, and his control was threatening to break as he remembered Brandy's desperation and pain. "Might have?! Hell, I'm going to!"
Without warning, Ben's temper won the battle with his self-control. He hit Rafe full force, knocking him to the deck. He shook his fist as he stood over him. "Now, get off my ship, Marchand. If I ever see you again, it will be too soon."
Rafe had been caught totally unaware by the blow, and it took him a second to recover and get up. Blood seeped from the corner of his mouth, and his jaw was aching. The man packed a good punch. He should have remembered Ben was Brandy's protector as well as her friend.
"Right now, I'll be the first to tell you that I deserved that," Rafe said, looking Ben in the eye. "But there's something more that you need to know. Things have changed."
"Right," Ben snarled, tempted to hit him again, but controlling himself with an effort.
"No, I didn't get the chance to tell her before she decided to leave, but I love her. She's going to have my baby, and I want us to be a family." He knew he was taking a chance opening up to Ben this way, but he wanted to get to Brandy as quickly as he could.
"Sorry, Marchand, I can't help you. Now, get off the Pride." Ben turned and walked away.
Rafe rubbed his sore jaw as he started from the steamboat. He was certain that Ben knew where Brandy was. In fact, Rafe had anticipated just such a reaction from Ben Rodgers and already had another plan ready to set into motion.
As he left the steamboat, Rafe nodded slightly to a man waiting on the levee with his bags, looking to all the world as if he were sailing on the Pride. The man returned his signal and mounted the gangplank to board the ship.
Rafe waited in town until the steamboat pulled out that afternoon. With his man in place, it was only a matter of time now until he received word on Brandy's whereabouts. Until then, he could only sit and wait. The prospect wasn't appealing, but for the time being he was thwarted.
The knock at the door jarred Rafe from a sound sleep.
"What is it?" he growled, sitting up in the darkness, wondering what time it was.
"There's a gentleman downstairs, sir," George told him through the closed door. "A Mr. Hampton. He says he has important information for you and must speak to you now."
At the mention of Hampton's name, Rafe was out of bed and pulling on his clothes.
"Show him into my study, George. I'll be down directly."
In the two weeks since Hampton had boarded the Pride to keep an eye on Ben Rodgers during the trip north, Rafe had had no word whatsoever from him. At times, the tension of waiting for news had nearly driven Rafe to drink, but he'd sworn off after Brandy left. He was glad now that he had, for he would be able to think clearly while dealing with the man. His instructions to Hampton had been clear follow Ben Rodgers whenever he left the boat at each port and see if he visited two women one pregnant, one elderly then report back.
Rafe made his way downstairs. He tried not to be too excited, but he hoped the man was bringing him good news.
"Mr. Hampton, a pleasure to see you," Rafe said as he entered his study.
The other man stood and they shook hands.
"Would you like a drink?"
"No, thanks, Mr. Marchand. I knew how quickly you wanted this information, so I hurried out here as soon as my boat docked."
"I appreciate it." Rafe went to sit behind his desk as Hampton sat back down in the chair before him. "Well, what did you find out?"
"Captain Rodgers was very cautious about his activities, which made this quite a challenge, but I managed."
"And?"
"And I do believe I've located your wife."
"Where?" Rafe came to his feet.
"She and her mother have taken a room in a boarding house in St. Louis, sir." He handed him a sheet of paper with the address on it.
Rafe looked up at the man. "You do good work, Hampton."
"Thank you."
Rafe unlocked his top desk drawer and took out an envelope. "Here's the other half of your fee, plus a nice bonus for you. I appreciate your discreetness in the handling of this matter."
"I'm glad I could bring you good news, sir."
George showed Hampton from the house. When he came back in, Rafe was standing in the hall waiting for him.
"Pack my bags, George, and order the carriage brought around. Brandy's in St. Louis, and I'm going to bring her home."
"Yes, sir!" George said happily. He knew there would be no peace in this house until Miss Brandy was back where she belonged.
The trip upriver passed slowly, but Rafe had expected no less. He consoled himself with the thought that Brandy awaited him at the end of his journey. Just seeing her again would make it all worthwhile.
When at last St. Louis came into view, Rafe was certain he could have jumped overboard and swum to shore quicker than the steamboat could churn its way to the levee. He gripped the rail to calm himself as he waited for the lines to be thrown and the vessel tied up. Finally, it was time.
For the whole trip north, Rafe had been confident, believing he could convince Brandy to come home with him, but now a sudden, terrible doubt assailed him. He feared that she truly did despise him and wanted nothing more to do with him. It was a humbling possibility, but one he knew he should face. He would go to her and tell her that he loved her. Until he did, nothing else mattered.
Rafe hired a carriage and made the short trip to the boarding house where she was living. He paid the driver handsomely to wait for him, then went up the steps to the house, knowing that the next few minutes would determine his whole future. He knocked on the door and waited.
"Can I help you?" an older woman asked as she answered the door.
"I'm here to see two of your tenants, Brandy and Libby. May I come in?"
"Theirs is the last room, upstairs on the right."
"Thank you."
Rafe hurried up the steps and down the hall. He knocked on the door and was rewarded when he heard Libby call out.
"Who is it?"
"It's me, Libby.... Rafe."
There was a silence, then the sound of footsteps, and the door opened. Rafe found himself staring down at Libby. She was looking up at him, tears streaking her cheeks.
"You came..." She kept her voice cautious as she tried to gauge his reason for seeking them out.
"Where's Brandy? Is she here?" he asked urgently. He had come all this way; he needed to see her.
Libby held the door wide. "No, she's not, but come in. I want to talk to you." She motioned him inside.
The room was small, but neat, with two beds, a table with two chairs and a dresser. He sat down at the table, and she joined him there after closing the door.
"Why did you come, Rafe? W
hy are you here?" Libby wasted no time in getting straight to the heart of her fear for her daughter. Rafe had broken Brandy's heart once; she would not let him hurt her again.
"I want to take Brandy, and you, home," he said.
"Why? So you can claim your winnings?"
"No, because a wife belongs with her husband."
"You never allowed her to be a wife to you. You told her Over and over you didn't want a wife. Why the change now?" Libby was close enough to him that she could make out his expression, and she could see the anguish there as he answered her.
"Because it took my losing Brandy to realize how much she means to me, how much I need her. I love her, Libby. It wasn't easy for me to admit or to recognize it for that matter. I've never loved a woman before, and it was more than a little frightening when I realized that I needed Brandy so desperately. I'm used to being alone. I'm a solitary man. I'm not used to needing people or to being needed. It's a new experience for me."
"And?"
"And I found that once I'd lived it, I didn't want to be without it."
Libby's heart softened, for she knew his words were from the depths of his soul. "You do love her, don't you?"
"Yes, ma'am. More than I've ever loved anyone, and I can't bear the thought of living without her."
"Well, what took you so long to find us?" Libby said with a little laugh.
He looked shocked. "I had to have Ben followed in order to track you down. When I went to see him in person, he wasn't too amenable to helping me." Rafe rubbed his jaw in memory.
"Ben's a good man. He loves Brandy, too. I'm glad you've come, but I do have to say one thing to you."
He didn't speak but waited for her words of wisdom.
"Brandy is my daughter. The child she's carrying is my grandchild. I do not want this baby to be brought up unloved and unwanted. I raised Brandy without a father, but she was loved. I will not stand by and watch this baby be used as a pawn in any struggle between the two of you."
"I understand, and I promise you, Libby, that if Brandy doesn't want anything more to do with me, if she wants to end our marriage, then I'll go."
Libby studied him, then nodded. "I believe in you, Rafe. Deep in your heart I know you're a good man. But now you have to prove it to my daughter."