by Melody Anne
If it wasn’t too late.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Sitting at her favorite place on the cruise ship — the back, where passengers rarely ventured — Savvy allowed herself the indulgence of a worried sigh.
She wasn’t about to deny that the cruise and all its stops at ports had been magnificent so far. Perfect, in fact.
But she and Ashton were living off caffeine and heightened hormones. They made love nightly, sometimes more than once, and though it seemed impossible, the lovemaking continued to grow better and better each and every time.
The ship was now cruising past a huge glacier with giant chunks of ice splashing off into the water below. It was a little frightening even for a fan of the ocean and of shipwrecks. She’d watched the film Titanic a few too many times not to be scared.
Come to think of it, that story hadn’t had a happy ending. Was that going to be how her story turned out? Yes, it seemed perfect right now, but what happened when the boat made it home? When they returned to the real world? What if Ashton turned out to be as cold as Jack when he drifted down to the ocean floor.
She’d told herself she wouldn’t let her fears overtake her, wouldn’t let worries cast shadows on her decisions. Ah, but she was in an epic romance, and with all good romances, there were bumps in the road, or on the sea. The passion ran high — and the letdown sometimes was too much to handle.
Taking a deep breath, she tried to calm herself. It was just that her nerves were beginning to spike again as she realized their voyage would soon be over. What was it going to be like when they returned to Seattle? Were they going to go back to being just boss and employee? Was the sex going to be over? As depressing a thought as that was, what was worse was thinking she wouldn’t get to laugh with the man anymore.
She’d gotten to see a side of him that he had hidden from her before, and it was a side she really liked.
“What are you so deep in thought about?”
This time, when Ashton found her as she watched the sun go down, she wasn’t startled. She sighed as his arms circled gently around her waist and rested on her stomach. Heat rushed through her, even in the coolness of the Alaskan water.
“I was just thinking that our adventure is almost over,” she told him with a sigh.
“Maybe this one is over, but it doesn’t mean that we are,” he told her as he kissed the side of her neck.
She shuddered at his gentle caress. But she had to say, “We haven’t talked about what it will be like when we get back.”
He was silent for a little while, though he didn’t stop paying homage to her charms. And she suddenly didn’t care about the future. Her core went molten and she began squirming against him.
“It will be just the way it is now, but instead of exploring Alaska and Canada, I’ll take you to some of my favorite places around Seattle and the San Juan Islands.” He was now rubbing his hands tantalizingly along her thighs.
“But I start school in a little over a month, Ashton.”
“Your university is in Seattle, Savvy. It’s not like we’re going to be on different continents.” And his lips almost made her forget what they were speaking about.
“I know,” she said as she leaned back into him. “But I told you that when I’m in school, it’s a different world for me. I’m so busy and so focused on improving myself, on succeeding.”
She was beginning to think, though, that maybe she’d been wrong about him. Maybe this wasn’t just a fling for him if he truly wanted to work through these obstacles and keep on seeing her. She was afraid to hope for that, but she was starting to.
“We’ll figure out a way to be together, my sweet Savvy. I love spending time with you. And if it’s important to both of us, we’ll make it happen.”
“This trip and our romance have happened so quickly, and we’ve spent so much time together naked that we haven’t done a lot of talking.” Why was she putting this all out there? Was she trying to push him away?
“We have plenty of time to learn everything about each other. I can’t get enough of what I do know about you,” he said, melting her heart a bit more.
Savvy had to laugh. “You’re a very smooth talker, Mr. Storm.”
“I’ve been told that before.” He turned her around so her back was against the rail, and he pressed tightly into her.
“I just bet you have,” she said. But she forgot the rest of what she’d been about to say when his lips fused with hers.
She barely felt him grip her hips and lift her onto the rail. But she was more than happy when he stepped inside the V of her legs, and then she felt his hardness pressing against her heat.
“It doesn’t matter how many times we make love. I feel like a randy teenager the second I’m within five feet of you,” Ashton said as he broke away from her lips and trailed his tongue down the side of her throat.
“Well, I have nothing to compare this with, but I feel the same,” she said before a small moan escaped her throat.
“I’d better get you inside, Savvy, before a passenger interrupts us.”
“You’re right, Ash. If we don’t go to your room now, I won’t be responsible for what happens. Your reputation is on the line, you know.”
His eyes narrowed and he pressed his arousal into her for another moment before pulling her down from her perch and stepping back.
“Damn, I want you,” he said.
She believed him. “And I love knowing that,” she replied.
When she realized she’d been sitting on the rail, high above the water, and hadn’t even noticed, she knew she was in more trouble than she’d thought. In this man’s presence, all she could feel was love, excitement, and passion. There was so little room for silly fears.
He took her hand and they raced off toward his suite, passing an employee who tried to get his attention. Ashton didn’t even slow down. Right now, nothing mattered to either of them except each other.
In a perfect world, it would always be this way.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Another deep swell sent the ship careening to the left.
Savvy cringed as she looked over at Ashton, where he and his team of men and women were navigating through the storm.
“We’ve gotten through the worst of it, darling,” Ashton assured her, looking her way.
No, no one on the ship was unaware of their relationship now. And for some reason, Savvy didn’t even care about that anymore. She was doing her job, so her romance with the boss wasn’t so disgraceful, she assured herself.
“I’m having a hard time believing you,” she said with a nervous chuckle as she looked out the giant windows and saw only wall after wall of nothing but foaming salt water crashing virtually in her face. “I should have known better than to go out onto the ocean with a captain whose last name is Storm.”
“Oh, that only brings a little bit more excitement,” he said. “Thrills¸ chills, and spills. But in a few more minutes we will be able to make it back down to my suite.”
After a few more nail-biting moments, she discovered that he was right, darn him. The waters calmed. There were still some swells, but as she looked out the window, she noticed stars breaking through the cloud cover. Her body began to relax.
For the next little while, his people continued steering the boat through the water, soon allowing the computers to take over, and then she saw more and more stars above them. She didn’t notice at first that Ashton was now kneeling in front of her.
“It’s all under control, Savvy. We’re through the storm, and the passengers have been notified and offered complimentary drinks at the bar tonight — any of them who still have the stomach for it. Let’s get out of here and enjoy ourselves. Just the two of us.”
He reached for her fingers and peeled them away from the rim of her chair. She hadn’t even realized she’d been holding on with such a death grip.
The two of them slowly made their way to his suite, the rocking of the boat a little more intense than it normally
was, but nothing like it had been for the past couple of hours.
“I have to admit that wasn’t the most enjoyable of the nights I’ve had on this cruise,” Savvy said after Ashton shut the door behind them. “I have a pretty strong stomach, but it’s a little stirred up right now.”
“The ocean is so much more powerful than most people realize. It does take a lot of lives every year, but I have an incredibly competent group of people working for me, and they’d never let us get into a situation that we couldn’t get out of. If we’d been in the middle of the storm, it might have been a different story, but we just caught the edges, thankfully.”
Ashton led her to his dining table. He grabbed a bottle, pouring each of them some amber liquid before he joined her. Savvy automatically picked it up, then began sputtering when the liquid burned all the way down her throat.
“What in the world is that?” she said, her stomach feeling like it was on fire.
“It’s a nice shot of scotch. Family favorite. I know it burns, but it will help with the nerves. Finish it up.”
She decided to trust him and, with a grimace, threw back the rest of the drink. He put cheese and crackers in front of her next, and she swallowed what she could, hoping that the food would help the burning and her upset stomach. It did.
“Now, you can have some more with a mixer,” he said as he sat across from her, a drink in his hand.
“Are you trying to get me drunk, Mr. Storm?” she said, feeling much better.
“I’m just showing off some of my mad bartending skills from the good old days,” he told her with a laugh as he stood up, grabbed a bottle and tossed it in the air and then caught it after it spun a few times.
“Sexy. Just like Tom Cruise,” she added with a wink.
“Hey!” he said with his signature scowl. “I’m much better-looking — and taller — than he is.”
“Hmm …” She paused as his scowl deepened. Then she conceded. “Yes, you are, Ashton.”
“That’s much better,” he told her.
Damn, he looked so good as he leaned back in his chair, a relaxed smile on his lips.
“I have to admit that I was incredibly impressed with the way you were handling the ship. Thanks for letting me go to the control room with you.”
“All of the crew have been in storms before and as I said, those storms can be deadly, but if everyone works together, they aren’t so bad. Now, if you ever see panic on my face, then is the time to grip your chair and forget to breathe.”
“I wasn’t exactly looking at your face, Ashton. I was watching the water trying to overtake this little boat. Trying to look taller, like you versus Mr. Cruise.”
“Trying?” he said with mock outrage. “I never try. “But seriously, storms are actually pretty fascinating to watch if you sit back and think about it.”
“Now that I know we’re out of danger, I agree with you, it was intense. But I don’t think I’ll be able to sleep at all tonight. I’m far too wired now.”
“Then we’ll talk all night if you want. We pull into Seattle tomorrow, so we both get the day off.”
“But I still have to clean my rooms, Ash.”
“No you don’t, Savvy. All the bedding is stripped and we bring in the big guns to prepare the ship for its next cruise.”
“I’m not one of the big guns?” she asked with a smile as she flexed her right arm. There was a little muscle there that she was quite proud of.
“You most certainly are, darling.”
He led her over to the couch and sat down with her in his arms. She sighed as she leaned into his warmth. This was heaven — right here, right now. With just a few of his words, she felt safer, warmer, and taken care of.
“I have always loved the sea, and I’ve been able to go out on dives, but never very far out, and only under the best weather conditions. But I’ve never really gotten to spend days and days at sea. It’s been a real treat — storms and all.”
“You’ll have to come on the next cruise as my date, and it will be easy as sin. We’ll have so much more time together.”
“Don’t you still have to take care of navigating the boat?”.
“I have a very reliable staff. They don’t even need me in there most of the time,” he said.
“Aren’t you running yourself out of a job?”
“I own the company. I play captain for fun, and then drive the real professionals crazy in the control room on occasion. But someday I plan to go out on the seas when I have young kids running around. My prime directive in life, I suppose, is to spend time with the people who are most important to me.”
“Wow, you really think ahead.” She’d instantly lost that relaxed feeling.
He seemed to notice her uneasiness.
“Don’t you? Most people I know have plans for their future, Savvy. Why so tense all of a sudden?”
“Oh, I’m not tense. And I do have plans, but they are all related to work,” she told him with a nervous laugh.
“Not everything should be about work, Savvy. What about family?”
She was quiet for a moment. “It’s just my sister now. Just the two of us.”
“That’s not the family I’m talking about. What about children?”
She really didn’t want to answer this question. She had a feeling they weren’t on the same page. They’d barely begun dating. Was this really a topic that should be coming up so fast? Dammit.
“I’m not going to have kids,” she finally said. “I have other plans.”
She felt him freeze up behind her. And the hand that had been caressing her arm so lovingly was now still.
“I don’t mean tomorrow, Savvy. I meant in the future.”
She couldn’t read his tone of voice. “I didn’t have the most wonderful childhood,” she told him. “And I don’t think I’d make a good mother, so I decided long ago that I will never become one.”
He was quiet for so long, she wondered if he was going to speak again. Just when she was about to give up, he gave her an answer.
“Lots of people say that, Savvy, but you can break any cycles you had with your own family. You’re caring, compassionate, and the most wonderful woman I know. I know that you’ll make a fantastic mother.”
“No, Ashton, I won’t be a mother. I have zero desire to have children. You’ve seen some of my fears, but this is probably my worst one.”
He really needed to understand this. When he pulled back from her, she felt as if a vise was clamping around her insides. This was another reason she hadn’t wanted to get into a serious relationship. When men were thinking about marriage, they were also thinking about procreation, weren’t they? She didn’t understand why. Weren’t there enough people in the world already? Why was she considered defective if she didn’t want to add to the population?
And did her feelings make her less of a woman? When Ashton stood up and she looked into his eyes, she almost felt that it did. His expression wasn’t filled with all-consuming love anymore. It was blanked out, just as it had often been before this idyllic voyage.
Before he was able to say anything more, his phone started buzzing. He looked down at the number before sighing. “I have to get this.”
After he’d been on the phone a minute, he turned to her. “I need to take care of something. It might take a while.”
And with that he walked into another room. Savvy sat there for about ten minutes before a tear fell. She wiped it away and stood up, then gathered her purse before walking out of his suite.
If he wanted to find her, he would know where to look.
But Savvy slept restlessly for the rest of the night, if she slept at all, and Ashton never showed up to claim her. She’d given her heart to him, all of it, but maybe he now considered her not woman enough to keep her man. Or to take him. Whatever. That thought made her cry herself to sleep as the ship rocked back and forth on its journey home.
She did love him. Whether she wanted to or not, she loved him. And now he clearly thought that
she wasn’t good enough.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Three days with not much more than three words from Ashton.
Savvy tried to hide her despair. She tried telling herself that he was busy. After all, they’d been away from Seattle for ten days, and a lot had happened while they were out. But he was avoiding her. That was the reality she had to face. Nothing irrational about it.
It was over, and he just didn’t want to have another messy scene like the one he’d been put through with his former fiancée. Savannah saw her best move forward as quitting. She’d be doing a favor both to Ashton and to herself. This job wasn’t going to last a lot longer, and there was no way she was going to get to dive for sunken treasure now, so what was the point of hanging around?
Minor problem. If she left, she’d have no place to live for the rest of her summer, and she’d be giving up her final couple of paychecks. She hadn’t taken the job here for the fun of it. And though she could probably find employment working in a café, that still didn’t help with her housing situation.
So even though seeing the man she was in love with kept plunging jagged knives into her hurting heart and twisting them, she had to suck it up. At least that was something she was used to doing. She was also used to mixing metaphors.
The day was coming to an end, and as Savvy put away her supplies, she didn’t think anything of the commotion down on the dock. Or she didn’t think anything of it until she heard her name being called out.
“Savannah! Savannah! I see you down there.”
Oh my gosh! She turned away but that did no good. The man continued to bellow and she was forced to look again.
“Don’t try to pretend you don’t know who I am! Tell these men to get their freaking hands off me!”
It was like she was in a horror show. Savvy was sickened to see the one person from her past whom she never, ever wanted to see again — her father, who was currently being restrained by two of the crewmen as they tried to escort him off the docks. He must have followed someone through the gate and bypassed the usual security.