by Austin, Lori
Noah wasn’t sure if that was good or bad. Without the concern of Tim, he might do something foolish. Like kiss her laughing mouth, or place his palms on her softly rounded hips or even—
“Did you say what I thought you said? Are you really staying?”
The improper images faded—for the moment. “Looks like it.”
“Oh, Noah.” She threw herself against his chest before he could stop her, and those images rushed right back.
Before he could stop his hands, they did what he’d been thinking of—cupping her hips, sliding over their curve before locking together at her back. She fit against him perfectly. Considering her size compared to his, such a thing was downright miraculous.
“I’m so happy. What did my father say to you? He wasn’t insulting, was he? Sometimes he is. But you have to ignore that.”
“If you call offering me a job at his bank insulting, he can insult me any day.”
“He did that?” She leaned back so she could see his face.
The small of her back flexed, and the curve of her buttocks slid along the sides of his hands. He clasped his fingers together tighter to keep himself from touching those curves any further. “He sure did.”
“How odd.”
“I thought so.”
“What else did he do?”
“Told me I could court you.”
She broke free of his hold, eyes widening, face turning red. “He didn’t!”
Noah’s heart stuttered. She didn’t want him to court her? He was only good enough to touch her in the shadows and not to walk with her down the street?
He certainly hadn’t seen that coming.
“He did,” Noah allowed. “But if you’d rather I didn’t, I can understand, Ruth. I’ve got nothing but what your father gave me. You’re better than that. Better than me.”
As red as her face had been, it went white now. She slapped him. “Don’t ever say that. Don’t even think it. You’re everything, and I want no one else.”
Confused, Noah raised his hand to his stinging cheek. As if she’d just realized what she’d done, Ruth let out a small cry and pulled his fingers away. Going up on tiptoe, she kissed him.
“I’m sorry,” she murmured. “Forgive me. I’m sorry.”
Pressing her face to his, he felt her tears and raised his head. “Don’t cry, Princess. I’ve had far worse than that happen to me.”
“I struck you. I can’t believe I did that. Noah, I love you. I’ve always loved you, and I always will.”
Noah shook his head. “We don’t know each other. You can’t love me.”
“Don’t tell me what I feel. I know you inside.”
Thank God that isn’t true.
“The only reason I ever considered marrying Leon was because I thought you were …” Her voice caught, and her lip trembled.
Noah couldn’t stop himself. He reached out and traced a shivering teardrop from her cheek. She tried to smile, but she couldn’t quite manage it.
“You thought I was what?” Did she have any inkling of what he had been?
“I thought you were dead. You didn’t come and you didn’t come. I couldn’t believe you’d leave me here all alone.”
He had. For her own good. For her own good now, they’d take this slow. They’d do things right. He would not tell her he loved her until he was sure he was capable of loving her the way she needed him to. He would not touch her again as he’d been touching her until he was certain he’d be able to stay with her forever. He owed Ruth that much.
“I’m sorry I hurt you,” he said. “I didn’t mean to.”
“None of that matters. All that does is that you’re here now. I reacted the way I did because my father treats me like a prize horse, to be bestowed upon his favorite man of the moment.” Though Noah had thought the same thing, he didn’t comment. “It’s embarrassing. He told Leon less than a week ago that he could have my hand.”
“No wonder the sheriff was mad.”
“I set Leon straight tonight. We’re friends, nothing more.”
“How did he take that?”
“Well enough.” She frowned. “He seems to think you’re a gunfighter.”
A gunfighter was one thing Noah wasn’t, so he had no trouble appearing innocent on that score. “Where did he get such an idea?”
“Your guns. The way you behave. Leon knows people.”
“Do you think I’m a gunfighter?”
She hesitated, and he knew she had wondered.
“I’m not,” he said quietly.
“Of course you aren’t!”
“It’s understandable that you would wonder, Ruth. I came here with a bullet in my belly. I’m sure folks in Kelly Creek don’t have such things happen to them every day of the week.”
“You explained what happened.”
“Did I?”
“You said you didn’t know who shot you. I believe you. Besides, if you were a gunfighter, I’d have heard of you by now.”
“Maybe I’m a terrible gunfighter. Maybe that’s why I was shot.”
“If you were a terrible gunfighter, you’d be dead. I told Leon he was being ridiculous.”
“And was he convinced?”
“No. But he’s hurt and jealous. He’ll get over it.”
Somehow Noah doubted that, but there was little he could do about Sheriff Harker, since he wasn’t willing to kill him just yet.
Ruth’s silence penetrated Noah’s reverie. She contemplated the hem of her robe. He lifted her chin, raising his eyebrows askance.
“Just because my father said so doesn’t mean you have to court me.”
“You misunderstood. I asked your father for his permission. Courting you was my idea, not his.”
Joy spread over her face. “Does that mean you love me?”
He didn’t want to hurt her, but he had to keep the lies to a minimum. “I’m not sure what love means, Ruth. I’ve never loved or been loved.”
“I love you.”
“How do you know?”
“I just know. I’ve always known.”
He didn’t understand that. Maybe he never would. “I want to be with you. I want you happy. I want to protect you. I want to love you. But I won’t lie about it. When and if I say those words, Ruth, they’ll be the truth, and they’ll be forever.”
Her hands relaxed. Her lips curved as she lifted her face and closed her eyes. “Kiss me, Noah. Like you did before.”
Gazing down on her sweet countenance, he was surprised to discover how difficult it was to deny her. If he was a new man, a better man, a gentleman, he should have no trouble keeping his lips off of Ruth. But before he could stop himself, his head dipped, and his hands grasped.
Noah closed his own eyes and fought the man he’d been, the one who would destroy her. He prayed he could become the man she wanted and needed—the man he’d always wished to be but had never been given the chance.
“Noah?”
He found her staring at him in bewilderment. And why wouldn’t she? Up to now he’d practically ravished her every chance he got. The mere memory made his body tighten and throb. Perhaps he was too much of an animal inside to ever be anything else.
Noah forced himself to kiss her brow, tuck the gaping sides of her robe together beneath her chin, and let her go.
“I will court you proper, Ruth, and that means no more kissing.”
“At all?”
“Not the way we did before.”
“But why not?” Her lip jutted out like a belligerent child denied her candy.
“It’s not proper, and you know it.”
“I don’t care about proper.”
“I do. We’ll do this right or not at all.”
“Do what?”
“Get to know each other. Isn’t that what courting is all about?”
“We’ve known each other for ten years, Noah.”
“No, we knew each other a few days. People change.”
“I haven’t.”
She ha
dn’t. That was the problem. She was still so far out of his reach, he should be shot just for thinking of touching her.
“Well, I have. You deserve a chance to see if the man I became is close enough to the boy you remember. Any future is between you and me, as we are now.”
She raised an eyebrow. “And who are we? The princess and the groom?”
“You’re still the princess, and though I’m not the prince, at least I’m not the groom anymore.”
She cupped his cheek. “You were always my prince, Noah. My hero.”
He covered her hand with his, pressing the palm to his face. “Maybe I can be your hero again.”
“I’ve only been waiting ten years.”
Ruth fell asleep with her head full of promises and her heart full of hope.
***
She awoke to the sun shining across her bed. The world looked just as bright. She couldn’t remember when she’d last awakened on New Year’s Day without a headache from overexertion and a lingering sadness that another year would pass before she could even hope to see Noah again.
But while she’d had a busy night and too little sleep, the promise of today, tomorrow, and the day after that made her anxious to get up. She bounded out of bed, tossed cool water on her face, then quickly dressed in a plain but warm winter day dress in navy blue.
After twisting her hair into a tight knot at the back of her head, she descended the stairs to discover Tildy hip deep in dirty dishes and leftover food.
“Eat something and pitch in.” Tildy brandished a dirty spoon in Ruth’s face. “I have too much to clean and no time to waste. I’m not going to rest until we’ve put this place back to rights.”
“Where’s father?”
“In his office. Left instructions that he didn’t want to be disturbed.”
Obviously, that message was for her. From the looks of her scowl, Tildy wasn’t going to venture out of the kitchen all day.
Ruth snatched a piece of bread from the counter and a cup of water from the back porch. She wasn’t very hungry, anyway. She was too excited. Today felt like the first day of a whole new life.
“Been out to the barn?” she ventured.
Tildy grunted, scrubbing the bottom of a frying pan. “Of course I been out to the barn. Who do you think milked the cow? My worthless husband? Or perhaps your brand-new beau?”
“Beau?” Ruth tried to appear innocent, but that was just too hard when she was guilty—and dying to talk to someone about her happiness.
“I may be old, but I’m not a fool. Your father brought the groom through here bright and early to teach him all about banking.”
“Noah’s in with father?” Her gaze was drawn to the hall that led to her father’s study.
“And not to be disturbed,” Tildy repeated. “That man looks like no banker I’ve ever seen.”
“You sound like Leon. Next thing I know you’ll be telling me Noah’s an outlaw. Like that Billy Jo Kansas Leon worries about so much.”
“Whatever he is, he’s a banker now and your beau.”
“Isn’t it wonderful?” Ruth breathed.
Tildy rolled her eyes. “You’d better be on your toes, Ruth. Sheriff Harker isn’t going to take kindly to your breaking off the engagement.”
“There was no engagement.”
“He thought there was.”
“Leon wouldn’t hurt me. He’ll get past this, and we’ll be friends again.”
“I wouldn’t count on that if I were you. Women scorned are nasty creatures, but men scorned can be just as bad.”
Ruth frowned. “Sounds like you’ve heard something specific.”
“Tim was to town and back already. Leon must have told his mother what happened between the two of you, and she’s telling everyone who will listen.”
Harker’s Store was a hive of gossip, and in a town the size of Kelly Creek, gossip was about all the entertainment folks had. Ruth groaned.
Tildy nodded. “People have been speculating for years about your Christmas Eve visit to the train station. Now that they have the answer in Noah, they can’t stop talking about it.”
“About what?”
“How you’ve thrown over Leon for a man you haven’t seen in ten years. Folks in this town adore the sheriff. You should be prepared for some cuts.”
“But—but—I couldn’t marry Leon. You understand that, don’t you? You’re the one who told me not to.”
“I’ve been where you are. I listened to my father because I thought that was my duty, and I married the man he chose. I’ve been living with that mistake ever since.” She flicked her spoon in the direction of the barn and made a face. “I didn’t have the gumption to wait for the one who rode away.”
“You didn’t have gumption?”
“Not at your age. Marrying Tim and being miserable because I didn’t have any gave me some right quick. Take my advice. I married the acceptable man because I didn’t want to live with the whispers. I’ve always been sorry. It’s made my life bitter, made me bitter. Do you love this boy from the train?”
Ruth didn’t have to think about her answer to that. “Yes.”
“That’s what I thought.” Tildy smiled. “Then you do what you have to do. Gossip fades. Unhappiness is forever.”
As if Ruth would even consider changing her mind because of gossip. She’d never cared what people thought of her, but there was someone who did.
“Does Father know?”
“Know what?”
Ruth winced as his voice boomed from the doorway. She glanced his way as Tildy returned to scrubbing her pan. Her father didn’t appear angry—yet—merely curious.
“Know what, Ruth?” he repeated.
After a glance at Tildy, a reminder of what the housekeeper had said about gumption, Ruth took a deep breath and plunged ahead. “I turned down Leon’s latest offer of marriage. He wasn’t happy about it. There’s gossip already.”
Her father scowled. “Now what sort of foolish thing was that to do?”
“I wasn’t going to marry him, Father. It was only fair to say so.”
“Fair is what I say it is, not you.” He took a deep breath, rubbed his forehead, and sighed. “Did I tell you to say anything to Leon?”
“I couldn’t very well continue on with Leon believing I might marry him now that Noah is here.”
“You turned down the sheriff because of Walker? Even though we don’t know if the boy is any good at banking at all?”
Ruth resisted the urge to stomp her foot. “I don’t care about banking, Father!”
“Which is why I need someone who does!”
“Leon isn’t a banker.”
“But he cares about Kelly Creek. We don’t know what Walker cares about. There are more tactful ways of doing things, Ruth. But then I shouldn’t expect you to understand. I need the sheriff on my side. You could have strung Leon along awhile.”
“No, she couldn’t have.”
Noah’s voice made Ruth’s heart stutter before beating faster. Even though she’d known he was in the house, hearing him, seeing him, was still like a wonderful surprise—almost like a Christmas present she had yet to open.
Noah stepped into the kitchen. His gaze was not for Ruth but her father.
“You got something to say on this, Walker?”
“Yeah, I do. Ruth couldn’t have strung Leon along because she’s too sweet and honest and good for that. I asked her to send him packing. I’m courting Ruth now. No one else.”
Her father raised an eyebrow. “Have you ever courted any woman before?”
“No, sir.”
“Then you can’t know that it’s common practice for more than one man to court the same woman.”
“Not this woman.”
The way he said the words, strong and sure, caused a warm glow to spread from Ruth’s heart throughout her body. Tildy had stopped scrubbing and stared at Noah, a soft smile on her lips, tears in her eyes.
But Ruth’s father didn’t appear impressed. His lip
s tightened. “Awful proprietary, aren’t you?”
“Damn right.”
“What if it would be better for Ruth to receive you both? Because of you she could have trouble in town. Lose the friends she’s made here.”
Noah hesitated and shot a quick glance at Ruth. In his eyes she saw doubt, uncertainty, and she opened her mouth to deny that she cared about anyone but him. Before she could, he straightened and faced her father. “That won’t happen if you do your job.”
“My job? I always do my job.”
“As a father?”
Robert Kelly flushed. Ruth tensed, but he did not lose his temper at Noah as he would have at anyone else. “What do you think I should do?”
Ruth’s mouth fell open. Her father had asked for advice? And the world had not stopped turning. Amazing.
“A few words from you, a well-placed frown or smile, and no one would dare cut Ruth or me, and you know it.”
“This is a small town. Folks here live by small-town rules.”
“They live by your rules.”
Robert shook his head. “There are prosperous businessmen, politicians, ancient and vicious matrons, who don’t take their orders from me.”
“Come now, sir, we both know that’s not true.”
Amazingly, Ruth’s father smirked and slapped Noah on the back. “You’re a bright boy. I saw that right away. You remind me of myself when I was your age. All right. You get Ruth exclusively.”
Ruth frowned. Just because he was giving her to Noah didn’t make his giving of her any more fun. As if he could sense Ruth’s defiance, Noah shook his head slightly.
Her father never noticed either one of them, for he was halfway down the hall on the way back to his office already. “I’ll deal with the gossips,” he called. “You can deal with Leon.”
“I’d be happy to,” Noah murmured.
The expression on his face shocked Ruth. He didn’t like Leon, and the feeling was mutual. But the coldness in his eyes and the set of his mouth made Ruth remember that Leon, a man who knew people better than most, had believed Noah killed for money. In that moment, Ruth thought so, too.
But in the next instant his blue eyes lit on her, and he smiled. That smile warmed her considerably, and she couldn’t remember why she’d ever thought him cold.