Brad stood in front of the window, looking out at the Las Vegas morning. This was the weirdest hotel room he'd ever been in. Being in the pyramid of the Luxor meant that one side of the room slanted upward at a forty-fivedegree angle. That side of the room was composed almost entirely of windows. Such an angle made it nearly impossible for anybody outside to see their suite. The interior of the room was decorated with hieroglyphics; they ran along the walls and doorways, were imprinted on the tiled floor of the large bathroom. The bed sat along one wall in the middle of the room. The carpet was light beige and felt deep under his bare feet. In short, he and Lisa were hiding out in relative luxury.
Lisa yawned and sat up in bed. Her eyes blinked open, puffy in sleep. Brad smiled and went to the bed. "Hey, he said, sitting down beside her. "How ya feeling?"
'tired," she said, yawning. She had slipped into a pair of boxer shorts and a tank top and tumbled into bed the minute they'd entered the room.
"Want some coffee?"
"Yeah." She looked around groggily. 'First I need a shower. I probably stink."
"You go for it. Want some breakfast?"
"Yeah "'Ihe mention of the word'breakfast" perked her up. She stopped on her way to the bathroom and looked back at him. "Gimme some French toast and scrambled eggs.'
"FYench toast and scrambled eggs it is."-
Lisa went into the bathroom and Brad picked up the phone and ordered a pot of coffee, French toast and scrambled eggs for Lisa, and pancakes and eggs overeasy for him. As an afterthought, he also ordered orange juice. By the time he was finished, the shower had already started. As well as Lisa's crying.
Brad paused, listening. The shower wasn't on full-blast. He could hear Lisa sobbing quietly, as if she were trying to hide it. Brad's heart sank at the sound of it. She really wasn't doing so well, and he couldn't blame her. There wasn't a day that passed when she didn't mention Alicia and her infant daughter and how guilty she felt. For the first few days of Lisa's return home she had been quiet about it, holding it in. Then, when she'd begun to break down suddenly and without warning, Brad thought she was reacting to the ordeal she had been through-and what he still thought was her reaction to what she had originally told him and the investigating officers. Now that the truth had come out, he was realizing what a terrible burden she had placed upon herself. Holding all that guilt in for over two weeks, agonizing over it every day, thinking about it over and over.
Lisa's crying cut through the din of his thoughts. He wanted to go in and comfort her, but at the same time he felt incredibly awkward. Two nights ago, when she had broken down and confessed to what had really happened, he had been frightened by her state of mind. He had never seen her-or anybody-so depressed. I killed them, Lisa had cried. I killed them, f killed them! Those words packed such a powerful accusation that it was hard to argue with them. Oh, he knew she hadn't really killed them, hadn't really slashed them to death with a knife or pointed a gun at them and pulled the trigger. But from a subjective point of view he knew Lisa was blaming herself for the murders of Alicia and her daughter, as well as Debbie Martinez. He suspected she was really berating herself over the murder of the baby. Because let's face it, he thought. She dangled that baby up as bait. And they went for it. Oh, they still tried to back out on the deal and Lisa was lucky enough to get away. But she hadn't been lucky enough to save Alicia and her daughter. And now she's beating herself up over it.
When Brad had first heard the truth, he didn't know how to react. He'd been shocked. Then a strange numbness had set in. He began looking at Lisa in a different light, seeing her through new eyes. Thinking about what she'd done was making him question who she really was.
And one of the foremost questions was, l can't believe Lisa would stoop so lucking low!
Followed closely by Don't think that about her! She's your wife! What would you have done?
Brad didn't know the answer to that question. It was a question he thought of often.
He had no idea what he would have done.
Brad approached the door to the bathroom, hesitating. He could hear Lisa crying in the shower. "Lisa " he said, softly, knocking on the door before he opened it. "Lisa?"
Lisa didn't answer. All she did was cry.
"Lisa." Brad stepped into the bathroom and approached the shower. The curtain was drawn, but he could make her out behind it, standing under the spray of water, probably hugging her arms to her sides, head down, sobbing.
"Hey, do you want to talk?" Brad stepped up to the shower.
"No" She hitched back a sob, her voice a hiccup. "No, I'm okay, I'm just…
"Just… what?"
She didn't answer him. She cried, her sobs loud and so ferocious that for a moment she couldn't answer. Brad waited outside the shower until Lisa calmed down somewhat. "Lisa?"
"`] hat?.
Brad hesitated a moment, wondering what to say. He had never seen her so depressed. "Lisa, let's talk.'
'I don't want to talk, I just want to die!" More sobbing.
*Usa," Brad said, doing his best to remain strong, but inside he was breaking down. He felt so alone and so scared for Lisa and her sanity. For the first time he felt weak, unable to do anything to make it all better. "Lisa, don't say that"
"It's true," Lisa sobbed. Brad opened the shower curtain so he could see her. She was standing with her back to the spray. She looked up at him with haunted eyes, her face puffy and red. "I just want to die. If I could kill myself now, I'd do it. I can never forgive myself for what I did."
"Lisa.. " Brad made an awkward attempt at taking her in his arms. Lisa shuffled back.
"No, don't touch me!" she cried. "Just don't touch me! Leave me alone! I'm a murderer! I'm a monster, and I just…Ijust…
"Lisa… Brad felt helpless, unable to offer a word or gesture of support. It felt like he was watching her drown in a rough sea that he couldn't calm.
"You don't understand what it's like," Lisa said, sobbing so uncontrollably that it was sometimes hard for Brad to understand her. "You just… don't understand how I feel… to know that I… I… I helped them kill this poor innocent baby. I led them to her… I… I… fed her to that… that… monster!" She broke down completely. "I fed a defenseless baby to a man who killed her! I just can't help thinking what… what… what she probably went through… how they… how they…" Lisa couldn't finish; she broke down sobbing.
Brad wasn't even aware that he was crying, too. Lisa's accusatory tone toward herself was like having a spike penetrate his guts. "Lisa, please," Brad said. He reached out and tried to grasp her arm. She didn't resist this time. He gripped her upper arm gently. "Please come out and let's talk."
"I'm stupid!" And then Lisa drove a fist into the center of her forehead so suddenly and so ferociously that it caught Brad by surprise. The blow rocked her head back. "I'm stupid, stupid, stupid!" Each stupid was punctuated by another blow to her forehead, right above the bridge of her nose.
Brad grabbed her arm before she could hit herself again. "Lisa, stop it!"
"Let go of me!" She struggled to free her arm from his grip.
"Not until you stop hurting yourself!"
Lisa went limp and sank to the floor of the bathtub, crying. Brad turned off the shower, then knelt down beside her, trying hard to keep his own emotions under control. He held her clumsily while she sobbed into his chest.
Brad sniffed back his own tears. His throat burned. He felt a heaviness in his chest. Hearing her say that she wanted to die, watching as she hit herself, hurt him in ways he never would have imagined.
They remained that way for a while, Lisa huddled on the floor, crying, Brad holding her awkwardly. Her tears slowed to a trickle, and when they did she was able to talk a little more coherently. "You don't know how much it hurts," she said, still averting her gaze from him, keeping her face pressed against his chest. You just don't know… as a woman… putting myself in Alicia's shoes… as a mother.: "
"I know," Brad whispered.
… i
t just hurts to know what happened to them. And to know that I helped make it happen. That if it wasn't for my own… greed, that-"
Something burst inside Brad. "Greed had nothing to do with it, Lisa, it was survival.'
"How can you say that?" She pulled back from him, her features anguished.
'You were acting on instinct,' Brad said quickly, hoping what he said would calm her down and help her see the error in her way of thinking. "You were pregnant yourself, Lisa. You were acting on… I don't know, a maternal instinct. Your number-one concern was protecting your self so you could save our baby. You didn't know what you were saying when you-"
"But our baby died!" Lisa screamed, sobbing again.
"Yes, our baby died." Brad grasped Lisa's shoulders, forcing her to look at him. "But there's nothing we can do about that now. It's not your fault our baby died, and it's not your fault that these men killed Alicia and her baby. They killed them, Lisa, not you. They did it!"
But I led them to Alicia and Mandy! I traded my life for theirs. And that makes me just as much of a monster as… as. "Lisa couldn't continue. She started sobbing again.
It broke Brad's heart to hear the guilt in Lisa's voice. Lisa was his life, his rock. He loved her more than anything in the world and had been so happy when she was found safe. When she had told him what had really happened, he still felt the same way. He'd been shocked, yes; disgusted by what these men had done and the activities they participated in. He still had uneasy feelings about what Lisa had done. He'd been horrified at the consequences-he wouldn't be human if he hadn't been. But he didn't hate her. He loved her and he wanted to protect her, and more than ever now he wanted to find the men responsible for what had happened and kill them.
Lisa leaned into him again, totally broken in mind and spirit, Brad held her, whispering to her, trying to soothe her as best he could but knowing that anything he said was falling on deaf ears. He felt dead inside. Part of him wanted to break down and cry, too, but he couldn't. It was as if his body wouldn't let him, as if it had turned that part of himself off so he could be strong for Lisa and support her, be her rock for her to lean on.
I'm so tired," Lisa said after her sobs trickled down. 'I'm just so tired.. "
"Come on," Brad said. He helped Lisa to her feet and out of the shower. For the first time since yesterday, she looked awful. Her skin was white and pale. She was trembling, and Brad draped a towel over her shoulders. *Let's get you in and lie down. Maybe some food will-"
Lisa had been looking ahead with a fixed stare, her pupils dilated, fixed on nothing. Suddenly, she turned a whiter shade of pale, put a hand to her mouth, and bolted back into the bathroom and fell in front of the toilet. Brad turned away at the sound of her retching. God, he hated it when people threw up. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, trying to drown out the sounds of Lisa throwing up, trying to summon the courage to be there for her. He made his way into the bathroom and knelt down beside her as she gagged and retched into the toilet. She hadn't thrown up much, just bile. A thin line of saliva drooled out of her mouth. She wiped it away with the back of her hand, gasping for breath. "1'm sorry," she said.
"It's okay."
"1 don't think I can eat anything."
"That's okay. You don't have to."
Lisa sat up, trying to catch her breath. She closed her eyes. It looked like she was fighting off another wave of nausea. "1 don't think I'm going to be able to handle the smell of food, either," she said hoarsely. "Do you think you can send the room-service stuff away?"
"Yes," Brad said. "I'll send it away."
l'hanks " Then she turned over and retched into the toilet again and Brad felt his own stomach churn at the sound. He waited by Lisa, patting her shoulder while she dry heaved, and then he helped her into the bedroom, where he eased her into bed and pulled the covers over her.
When room service knocked on the door, Brad hus tied outside quickly and dosed the door. "Listen," he said, slipping the room-service attendant a ten-dollar bill. "My wife suddenly got sick and I'm going to have to send this away. I'm sorry"
"No problem, sir." The bellhop was young, with a blond crew cut.
The door to the room opposite theirs opened and a huge black man with a shaved head peered out. He caught Brad's eye and nodded. Brad caught a brief glimpse of John Panozzo, the guy who had picked him and Lisa up last night, just beyond the door, and he nodded back. Security. The door dosed, and Brad stepped into the room and dosed his own door to the world of the Luxor.
Lisa was still huddled in bed. She had stopped crying, and she lay with her eyes dosed, the covers pulled over her. "Will you be okay fora while?"
*Where are you going?"
"Just out for a while"
"I'm sorry." Her voice broke, and for a minute Brad thought she was going to cry again.
"It's okay," Brad said quickly. "I'm just going to head out for a quick bite and I'll be back. John Panozzo is watching the room from across the hall with a partner, so you'll be safe"
"He is?"
"Yeah" Knowing that John and his men were watching over them made him feel a hundred percent better. As long as they stayed at the hotel, they would be okay. As long as somebody was around to watch Lisa, he could just slip out quickly and grab some breakfast and hightail it back. Plus, he had to call Billy and see if there was any news. "1'm going to get dressed and then I'll be gone. I'm leaving the cell phone John gave us in case you need it." "
"Okay," Lisa mumbled, dosing her eyes again.
Brad drew the shades, darkening the room. Carrying his travel bag, he went to the bathroom and quickly slipped out of the clothes he had slept in last night, washed up, brushed his teeth, applied deodorant, and dressed in a pair of shorts, a fresh polo shirt, and socks and shoes. He made sure he had his wallet and the room key, checked on Lisa one last time before he left, then slipped out of the room.
He knocked on the door to the room across from theirs and it opened. John Panozzo peered out at him. "Any trouble?"
"None, except Lisa's feeling sick," Brad said. "I'm going to go downstairs real quick for a bite to eat. You guys going to be up here?"
"Yeah. Hold on a second." He disappeared for a minute, then emerged. "You want somebody to come with you?"
"Nah, I'll be fine."
"Okay. Ill let hotel security know." John had explained to them last night on the drive over that if they wanted to walk around the casino to let him or his partner, Titan, know so they could alert security. Luxor security had been briefed on the situation yesterday afternoon, and they'd have plain-clothed security guys watching them discreetly, as well as be under the watchful eye of cameras. "Be back as quick as you can."
"I will."
Brad Miller headed down the hall to the elevators, trying to put some order to the thoughts that were running through his head. Under normal circumstances, the slot machines and card tables would have beckoned and he would have been playing roulette by now. But with a sick wife (who was also in danger of losing her sanity), Brad was worried not only about the investigation, he was worried about Lisa. If she kept beating herself up over what had happened, she might fall into a stage of such deep depression that she could become withdrawn, suicidal. He had to think of a way to help her. Therapy would obviously be the best option, but he couldn't very well look in theYellow Pages in LasVegas for a shrink, could he?'They were on the run, in protective custody. They were supposed to be hiding out from the bad guys. He had to talk to Billy pronto. The more Brad knew what was going on in the investigation, the better he would be able to make a decision on what to do.
And what to do? That was a question that deserved much pondering, which he did downstairs in one of the restaurants over a hasty breakfast of scrambled eggs, sausage, and lots of coffee.
Twenty-five
William Grecko was in his office putting the finishing touches on a case file so he could turn his attention back to the Miller matter, when his secretary forwarded a call to his personal line.
/> He picked up on the first ring. "Yeah, Becki?"
"George Brooks is on the line," Becki said. "He says he's the senior partner of Peterson and Dunn, and that he's Lisa Miller's employer."
"I'll take it." Billy knew George well.
Becki put the call through and George's voice came over the speaker. "Mr. Grecko?"
"What can I do for you?"
"Well, I was wondering if you could help me" William leaned forward as he listened. He had dealt with George a few times in the past, mainly in assisting with various court cases. George knew that he and Brad were friends, and William guessed that the reason the man was calling him now had to do with Lisa. He was right. "I need to get ahold of Lisa, and I understand she's in kind of a sticky situation."
"Yes, that's right, George. I'm afraid I really can't go into it any more than that, though!
'"Rut's quite all right. I surely understand the attorneyclient relationship." Billy smiled to himself as he listened to the man on the other end ruffle through some papers on his desk. It sounded like George was talking on speaker as well. "1 do need to get in touch with her, though. It's rather important."
William opened the bottom drawer of his desk and extracted a flask; he unscrewed the lid. "I can give her a message. He took a sip; the rum burned straight through to his gut.
A short pause from George. "It's that serious, then?"
'I'm afraid so."
"Forgive me for my ignorance, Billy." George picked up the phone and William picked up the receiver of his own phone, giving them a secure line. George's voice was clear, tinged with concern. But what in God's name is going on?"
"You don't know?"
"I know that Lisa was kidnapped by what sounds like gang members and was sexually assaulted, but that's all I know"
1M." George Brooks wouldn't have found out what had really happened, not so soon. He had no idea what was going on. "Well, I'm afraid it's a little more delicate than that, George" Despite the stress he was going through, Billy relaxed a little. He had known George for twenty years, and he was one of the most reputable lawyers he had worked with. Although he knew George on a somewhat casual basis, he liked the man. Still… "Again, I'm sorry, but-"
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