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by Marion Croslydon


  “It’s nice to see you’re human after all,” she mumbled in the hollow of my neck.

  The cell in my jeans pocket beeped. I parted from my hugging partner and we swept our tears off our cheeks at the same time. The text had to be from Josh. I hadn’t spoken to him since leaving Kansas City last Friday, but he’d written me several sweet, if slightly mysterious messages. I still had no idea what was going on.

  Josh (13:12): On my way out of town in the car. Should be in SH in about 2 hrs.

  My fingers started to type.

  Cassie (13:13): Meet me. You know where…

  It was time for me to let Josh in.

  Good! I heard Gran say out loud, as though she was standing next to me.

  I think she really was.

  CHAPTER 27

  Josh

  The drive from Kansas City should have stolen my attention. I’d been squinting through the blowing snow to see the road ahead so hard my eyelids ached. But even a force-twelve hurricane wouldn’t have stopped me and my Honda rental. I was on a mission.

  I drove past the city-limits sign welcoming visitors to Steep Hill, ‘The Legendary Cattle Town.’ As kids, Cassie and I used to make fun of it. Later, there was no road sign I’d dreaded more than that one. It wasn’t funny anymore. It meant heartache and betrayal. Today the road sign meant friends and family. Friends I chose. Family I had made.

  It’d been a long road back to Steep Hill, not just on today’s drive. It’d been a five-year long road that’d taken me away from Kansas and from myself. But I’d found myself again and I was returning home.

  I carefully merged onto the side road that led to Sweet Angel Point. The path was twisty and the wheels of the car skidded on the ice patches. If there was one thing my father had taught me well, it was how to drive. I hadn’t been that good a teacher with Cassie, unfortunately.

  When I made it to the top of the hill, I gently applied the brakes. There were no other cars. I padded around the hood of the car, my feet crunching on the thick layer of snow. The weather had cleared and the cold rays of sun made the prairie around me glisten. I rested my back against the trunk of the cottonwood tree and let myself indulge in the snow-padded silence.

  Cassie would arrive soon.

  A whistle sliced through my thoughts. I straightened up. It’d come from close by. I checked my surroundings.

  “Come on, Champ. Eyes up!”

  I stumbled away from the tree, my gaze searching for the voice hidden within the branches. I circled around the trunk and there I found two legs hanging from a branch in the upper reaches of the tree. A head and a mass of blond curls soon emerged into view.

  “Cass, are you fucking nuts? You’re going to break your neck.”

  I extended my arms upwards, in an attempt to catch her should she fall.

  “Relax. Unlike you, I kept climbing trees even as an adult.”

  “That doesn’t make me feel any better. Can we try and figure out how to get your skinny ass down here?”

  “Do you remember the last time you were up here?”

  “Of course I do. I proposed to you from the branches of this goddamned tree. I can’t believe the lengths I went to extract a ‘yes’ from you.”

  “Actually, you didn’t propose to me. I proposed to you, remember?”

  “Yes. I wanted it to be your choice.” Cassie shuffled on the branch and my stomach leaped into my throat. “Please, Cass. I’m begging you, please come down. You’re scaring the shit out of me.”

  If I’d been in need of a therapy before, it wasn’t the case anymore. Lately, I’d been professing my deepest fears to anyone who would listen.

  Cassie continued. “Our first times are always here. The first time we made love, the first time you told me you loved me, the first time we got engaged.”

  I was trying to devise a safe plan to get her down so I absentmindedly answered: “We only got engaged once.”

  “You’re right. The second time is scheduled for today.”

  My brain played catch-up and my own voice sounded dumb in my ears. “You’re going to propose?”

  “No, you are.” My eyes were glued on her so I couldn’t miss the cloud falling over her face. “I mean, if you want to.”

  “Cass, I hate to break it to you but you never signed the divorce papers, so, technically, we’re still married.”

  “I know that.” The playfulness had gone out of her voice and she was all seriousness now. “But I’m up here because I want to give you the choice again, just like you did when we were seventeen. You said then that I had to do it out of free will.”

  “So you want me to propose to you freely?”

  “If you don’t want to, you’ve got plenty of time to drive away. It’s going to take me a while to get back down.”

  Despite the fact that the girl I loved was twelve feet above me, clutching a cold tree on a snowy afternoon, I couldn’t keep the burst of laughter inside. My reaction drew a frown from Cassie so I stopped. “Cass, if I didn’t control myself, I’d propose to you pretty much every day. And before you say anything, I’m aware that was a very cheesy line.”

  “Cheesiness suits you, Champ. So feel free to shower me in it as much as you want.”

  “Point taken, but please come back to sea level.”

  It took ten hazardous minutes for Cassie to climb down the tree, lots of twisting and turning and swearing. I gave her clear instructions that she kept ignoring.

  “Okay, Cass, well done. I’m right behind you so turn around slightly and I’ll catch you.”

  I expected Cassie to turn and loop her arms around my neck so that I could help her back to ground level. Gently. Instead she launched herself onto me, causing me to stagger backwards and lose balance. I crashed on my back with Cassie on top of me.

  She was light as a feather and I recovered quickly, hunching back up with Cassie on my lap. Patches of snow were caked over her face. I gently wiped them off. “I think your climbing is about as bad as your driving.”

  “I think you might be right.”

  After our days apart, having her in my arms, her warm breath brushing against my face was worth freezing my ass off in the snow for. I leaned closer to her so that the tip of my nose touched hers. I turned my face slightly the way I knew she loved.

  “I’m still expecting you to propose, ya’ know. It won’t be on your knees, but on your butt. Still okay by me though.”

  I welcomed back the sparks as they returned to her eyes. I brushed a wisp of hair away from her face. “Before getting to that, I want to tell you about Kansas—”

  “—Don’t,” she hushed me. “Not yet. Your mom told me once that any strong family starts with two people committed to each other, trusting and helping each other, growing together… I want this proposal to be about us merging our lives because we love each other, not because we have to.”

  “Cass, I’ve wanted to marry you since you stomped on my foot back in first grade. I just couldn’t do it then because we were six and it’d have been illegal.”

  “I want you to propose to today’s Cassie, not first-grade Cassie, or even worse senior-year Cassie. When I say ‘yes,’ it’ll be to the man you are now, not the boy you were then.”

  “So you’re going to say ‘yes’?”

  She lifted her chin in that cute, headstrong way of hers. “Ask and you’ll find out.”

  In the distance, I caught the sound of a bird singing. It echoed across the open ground around us. I filled up my chest with air and the frozen sensation stung my lungs.

  “Cassandra O’Malley, do you want to be my wife?”

  With her gaze locked with mine, she answered, “I do.”

  The bird kept on singing as if it was spreading the good news to the whole world, but the outside world didn’t exist anymore for Cassie and me. For the first time, we allowed ourselves to be just the two of us.

  Finally, Cassie shut her eyes tightly and opened them again. She pressed her lips together, then inhaled sharply. “So now,
tell me what happened in Kansas City.”

  EPILOGUE

  Cassie ~ Palermo, Sicily, Italy

  There really was something about the Italian language.

  It made pretty much anything sound crazy romantic, as if each word had been designed to get la signora into bed. Listening to Josh’s deep, mellow voice, declaring that his life was mine, sent me spinning into Romantic Heaven.

  Io, Joshua, prente te, Cassandra, come mia sposa

  E prometto di esserti fedele sempre,

  Nella gioia e nel dolore,

  Nella salute e nella malattia,

  E di amarti e onorarti

  Tutti I giorni della mia vita

  I hung on every syllable that floated out of his mouth and hoped that I wasn’t gaping. He didn’t stumble, but kept my shaky—and hopefully not too clammy—hands in his. They felt strong, steady and… sweat-free.

  Earlier I’d been overwhelmed when we’d stepped into la Chiesa di Sant’ Agostino. Josh told me the church was an example of ‘Romanesque Gothic.’ I had no idea what ‘Romanesque Gothic’ meant, but it was even more beautiful than it sounded. Then he’d led us to the back of the church and broke into his impro in italiano.

  “What is he saying, Mom?” Lucas tugged at my dress. You could always count on him to kick romance right in the butt.

  Josh’s gaze broke slowly away from me to settle on the little man standing next to us, all brown eyes and hair. The Sicilian sun had given his skin a hint of toffee that matched his dad’s. They both looked good enough to eat.

  “I’ve told your mother I’ll love her forever.” Josh pinched Lucas’s nose as he often did to tease him.

  “Again?”

  “You can never say ‘I love you’ too often, Champ.”

  “Are you going to kiss her again?” Lucas’s eyebrows wiggled at Josh as he posed the question.

  I quickly scanned the interior of the church looking for the silhouette of a priest or a guard. “I’m pretty sure kissing in a church in Sicily isn’t quite the thing to do.” At least, not the French kiss I had in mind.

  Instead, Josh brought my hand to his lips and brushed each knuckle with the same gentleness he’d have used on a newborn. I was in the perfect place to thank God for giving me Josh not once, but twice.

  Another family of tourists moved closer to where we stood and broke our moment. We made our way out of la Chiesa and started strolling down la via Francesco Raimondi. I loved saying all these names out loud and let the foreign words caress my tongue.

  We were careful to avoid the midday heat, so all the sightseeing was scheduled for the morning or late afternoon. In another nearby chiesa, the clock struck five. In Sicily, even the sound of a freakin’ bell had a touch of magic about it.

  “Can we go to the market now?” Lucas begged. He looked up at us with his perfect pout that made my heart melt and burst at the same time. Wherever we went, he’d taken the habit of inserting himself between us, clutching our hands tightly. Josh and I missed holding each other’s hands though. So during our ‘date’ nights—and by ‘date’ I mean a quick bite out at a local place—our hands stayed glued together as if some Hubba Bubba had gotten stuck between our palms.

  “We promised you we’d go there and you’ve been so well-behaved, you might even get a treat.”

  My answer made Lucas squeal and jump up and down a couple of times. Soon we turned into Il Mercato di Capo. It was a long street market alive with hustle and bustle. I’d never seen anything like this before: a jumble of vendors’ stalls, selling everything delicious under the sun, from oranges to tomatoes to freshly baked bread and fish that swam in little buckets.

  “Yucky!” Lucas grimaced. “It stinks.”

  “Lucas!” I gently scolded him. I had to say though, it did stink. I’d never liked fish.

  We hurried away from the area where the fishmongers were gathered. Twice Josh guided us out of the trajectory of those cute, murderous little Vespas. They bolted along the market streets, from one narrow alley to another, as if nothing or no one was standing in their way.

  I let out a stressed breath when we escaped from Il Capo and plopped down at a table outside a coffee shop, with Josh and Lucas on either side of me. By that point, I was craving an Italian ice cream as badly as my son was. Lucas settled for his new fav—fragola and pistachio—and I indulged in a cioccolato fondente. When we came back to our table, Josh had ordered a Coke for himself.

  “You don’t know what you’re missing,” I tempted him by rolling my eyes after my first bite. The corner of his mouth curled upwards. There was a couple of silent seconds which were soon shattered by Lucas.

  “My friend Charlie, he’s allergic to fish and, if he eats some, he has all these yucky spots popping on his skin, like EVERYWHERE.”

  Josh started asking Lucas questions, but I struggled to keep my attention glued on poor Charlie’s story. Cioccolato fondente was about as good as it got. I enjoyed how the ice cream melted on my tongue. It managed to feel both cold and smoldering.

  Cioccolato fondente was good, but watching my two men lost in their own chit-chat topped the happiness chart. Lucas had come to live with us for good February last year and the adoption had been legalized right before last Christmas. I savored every second of our time together.

  It was now two years since Gran had passed away, which had soon been followed by Alfredo’s death. We’d kept our promise to him and, as soon as the summer holiday and a break in Josh’s work schedule had allowed, we’d flown to Sicily. The Guidi family had come from a village an hour’s drive from Palermo and we were heading there tomorrow.

  My eyes rolled once again, but this time it was to check the tiny slice of sky visible between the tall buildings bordering the narrow alley. I winked at Gran and Alfredo and, deep in my soul, I knew they were at peace. Our life was not perfect. Dammit, our family sure wasn’t perfect, but we were together and I was plain grateful for it.

  If we were here today, enjoying a gelato in Palermo, it was also thanks to those who remained and who loved us: Josh’s mom, Miranda, back in Steep Hill; Woodie and Clarissa and their sweet, red-haired little girl, Quinn.

  I was thankful to Shawn and Sam who had flown to Kansas City to meet Trisha and the judge after the photo debacle. Even Will, my agent, had put a good word to explain my relationship with Shawn. And it was all Josh’s doing. He’d orchestrated that while I’d been in Steep Hill. I’d seen a lot of Shawn over the last year since we were co-writing most of the songs on his latest album. I’d penned a few songs for myself too... One of these days, I might come back on stage.

  Andrea Loretti and her husband had backed down from their crusade to adopt Lucas. I think Josh had something to do with that too. Andrea was fostering now. Lucas and I had visited her a couple of times and, of course, she’d baked us a truckload of chocolate chip cookies.

  “Mom, have I been here with my mommy and my daddy before?” Lucas’s question startled me.

  “You mean here, like this exact gelato place?” He nodded. “I don’t know if you came here, here before, but you travelled to this city with them when you were a baby.”

  He chewed on my answer while he finished the fragola of his ice cream. It was still difficult for him to reconcile his fading memories of Jenna and Chris with our life in D.C. Coming to Sicily was a way to keep that part of him alive and build new memories.

  A man dressed all in black with a white mask had started a street mime performance a few yards away.

  “Can we stay and watch him, please?” Lucas asked.

  Josh took a napkin and wiped away the ice cream that was smeared over Lucas’s face. “Go, but stay on this side of the crowd so that we can see you.”

  Lucas climbed down from his chair and hurried away.

  “A penny for your thoughts” Josh took a sip of his Coke.

  “Nothing. I was totally fixated by Charlie’s fish acne.”

  “You’re not fooling me, Cass.”

  I shrugged. “I was thinking of
the family we’ve made, the three of us, and the one we have with our friends.” Josh extended his arm and entwined his fingers with mine. I gazed down at our hands joined…hopefully forever. “In the end, family is much more than just blood.”

  The sound of Lucas giggling drew my attention back to him.

  Josh brought my hand to his lips and kissed it with the same gentleness he’d done in the church. “Family is about love, and love is something we have plenty of.”

  Fast Forward (Second Chances # 2)

  If you feel like leaving a review for Fast Forward, you can do so on Goodreads or wherever you purchased it.

  Thank you,

  Marion ❤

  You Turn (Second Chances # 3)

  Are you intrigued by the mysterious Zach Murdoch? Want to know more about him? Then let’s travel to Paris, France, in May 2014 and find out about Lenor’s second chance at love…

  Second Chances # 4

  Many readers of Oxford Shadows (The Oxford trilogy # 2) and No Reverse have shared with me their ‘affection’ for the deliciously roguish Sam Blackhawk. Let’s follow him when he looks for his own ‘Forever’ in August 2014.

  ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

  I would never have written Cassie and Josh’s story without the support of some very kind-hearted, inspiring, passionate people.

  … Claudia at PhatPuppyArt and Teresa Yeh at Teresa Yeh Photography, for making Josh and Cassie look so cute and sexy;

  … Chris Eboch, for your calm and positive attitude;

  … Steve Parolini, for being a hero (yes, you are!);

  … L.J. Anderson at Mayhem Cover Creations, for dancing the tango with me;

  … Sara O’Connor at Gliterary Girl, for your flair and making my website look so very ‘gliterary’ too;

 

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