“I enjoy sleeping out. It reminds me of going on cattle drives when I was a boy.” Gardner shaded his eyes and looked at the sun, which was sinking over the Santa Catalina Mountains to the southwest. “When do you think you’ll be making camp?”
“My partner is probably doing that right now,” Zeke admitted reluctantly. “We’re taking a few mares to our ranch. We like to give them time to graze before it gets dark.”
“You’re a rancher? I’ve never heard of you.”
He hadn’t heard because he hadn’t had the courtesy to ask Zeke’s name. Zeke would have taken offense at Gardner’s surprise if he hadn’t become inured to white men thinking it impossible that a black man could earn enough money to buy a ranch.
“We have a small ranch on the Babocamari River just outside of Fairbank.”
“I didn’t catch your name,” Gardner said.
“It’s Zeke Maxwell. My partner is my brother. His name’s Hawk.”
“I look forward to meeting him, and your partner,” Gardner said to Josie.
The trail passed through a spot where the cactus grew so close that Gardner had to drop back. Even the mules moved a bit closer together. Zeke could hear the spines of the cholla scratch their way along the canvas wagon cover as it passed. He hoped they didn’t cause any rips.
“Why don’t you want Mr. Gardner to camp with us?” Josie asked.
“I never said I didn’t want him to come along.”
“You didn’t have to. One look, and it was obvious you wanted to hit him. Do you dislike every man except Hawk, or are you afraid you can’t measure up because you’re black?”
Chapter Eight
Zeke turned away from Josie to stare at the trail ahead. Her question reached down deep into the core of him, to a place where even Hawk was seldom allowed to go.
He’d spent the first fourteen years of his life as a slave, ripped from his mother and sold to a woman who beat him, starved him, berated him, told him he was stupid and not worth the hundred dollars she’d paid for him. His home had been her attic, his bed the bare floorboards, his food the scraps from her table. His work had been whatever menial chore she assigned him, his reward constant complaints that he couldn’t do even the simplest job right. She had threatened to shoot him, sell him, give him to the Indians. In the end she’d sold him to some farmers who’d nearly killed him with overwork. It wasn’t until Jake and Isabelle adopted him that people stopped treating him as the lowest form of life.
Years later he finally realized he’d survived those first fourteen years only because he hated that woman for making him feel unworthy. He’d fought his adopted family at first because he didn’t believe anyone could like him. He’d gravitated to Hawk because the two of them were the only nonwhite kids among the eleven orphans Jake and Isabelle had adopted, not because he thought Hawk liked or trusted him any more than he liked or trusted Hawk. He’d only begun to change when he realized that regardless of the stupid or mean things he did, Jake and Isabelle weren’t going to throw him out. He found that hard to believe, but it was even harder to believe they wanted him to stay because they loved him.
He’d only begun to believe it might be possible, to hope it was possible, when he and Hawk had come home after being away for nearly a year and Isabelle had greeted him by throwing her arms around him. Her tears had practically soaked the front of his shirt. Then, after making sure both he and Hawk were healthy and unharmed, she’d given them a first-class dressing down for being gone so long without writing. She’d ended up saying that if they ever did that again, she’d come after them herself. She’d then punched each of them in the chest before breaking into tears and telling them to get out of her sight until dinner was ready. Naturally she’d fixed their favorite foods.
He’d been so caught up in his thoughts, he hadn’t realized the mules had slowed down to sample the leaves of a stand of young willows. A sharp crack of a whip over their heads got them started again.
But while he’d finally come to believe that Jake and Isabelle thought he was just as good as any other human who’d ever been born, the rest of the world hadn’t agreed. He and Hawk had been hired by some of the most important people and some of the biggest businesses in the Southwest. Most men he’d worked with respected his judgment and character, but as soon as he and Hawk finished their work, they wanted them out of sight. Preferably, out of town. He told himself he was as good as anybody else. He believed it when Isabelle treated him exactly as she treated her other sons, but did he believe it when the rest of the world didn’t? He turned to Josie.
“I’m not afraid to measure myself against any man in the world. Somebody will prove to be better than I am at everything I can do, but that doesn’t make me less of a man. Do you feel like you’re less respectable because your mother was a slave?” They had avoided the issue of the color of their skin, but now they were in it up to their knees. Josie acted as if he’d stuck her with a pin.
Unfortunately, the trail had widened and Gardner pulled even with them again. “I hate these damned cactuses,” he said. “I had a man who nearly lost a finger before my mother could get the thorn out.”
It was all Zeke could do to keep from telling Gardner to get back behind the wagon. By the time he managed to control his anger enough to be sure he wouldn’t say anything stupid, he realized it was probably better that he and Josie had been interrupted. They’d never been able to have a discussion without it turning into an argument. But the issue Josie had brought up went way beyond any differences between them. It reached all the way down to a level where they were the same, a place he was sure Josie didn’t want to go any more than he did.
“We always try to camp next to the river,” Zeke told Gardner. “That gives us easy access to water, and means we aren’t as likely to wake up with thorns in our behinds.”
Gardner’s gaze moved past him to Josie. “It would be a great shame to ruin such perfection.” Zeke wondered if the man was taught to talk like that or if it came naturally. “You don’t have to worry about me,” Josie said to Gardner. “I sleep in the wagon.”
“And I sleep next to it,” Zeke added. “But I don’t sleep very well. The slightest noise tends to wake me up.”
Gardner flashed another one of those smiles Zeke wanted to knock off his face. “What a coincidence. I don’t sleep well, either. I often have to get up and move around for a while before I can fall back to sleep.”
“Then you’d better be careful,” Zeke said. “I’d hate for my brother to shoot you, thinking you were out to steal our horses.”
“Hawk’s an odd name for a black man.”
“He’s not black. His mother was a white woman. His father was a mean-tempered Comanche.” “Then he’s not really your brother.” “We were adopted along with a bunch of white boys. I’ve got lots of brothers.”
It pleased Zeke to see Gardner’s confusion. He was certain the man was trying to come up with a reason why any white couple would adopt a black kid and a half-breed. Before Gardner could ask any questions, Suzette appeared on the trail ahead of them. If she was surprised at seeing Gardner, she didn’t show it.
“Hawk has made camp,” she called out to them. “It’s just a short way ahead.”
It had been a long time since Josie had endured a more uncomfortable meal, and it was all Zeke’s fault. She didn’t know why he had to try to act like her bodyguard. It wasn’t as if she was in any danger from Gardner. The man was so rich he probably thought he was entitled to anything he wanted, but Josie was fully capable of explaining, if necessary, that he wasn’t entitled to her. And to be fair to him, the worst thing he’d done was act as if he should be the center of attention. He hadn’t stopped talking since they’d made camp. And asking questions.
“Are you sure you don’t want anything else to eat?” Suzette asked Gardner. “If we don’t eat it now, we’ll have it for breakfast.”
“I couldn’t eat another bite.” Gardner stood and stretched his legs. “I need to settle my di
nner before I bed down for the night. If you have no objection,” he said, turning to Hawk, “I’ll go with you to check on the horses.”
“Sure,” Hawk said with a decided lack of enthusiasm.
Hawk had started out the day in jeans and a check shirt, but sometime after stopping for the night he’d found time to change into buckskins and exchange his boots for moccasins. The feather was back on his head, too. Josie didn’t understand the significance of the change, but she’d noticed two sharply whispered exchanges between Hawk and Zeke.
“Zeke tells me you have a mare with Morgan blood,” Gardner said to Hawk. “I’ve been looking for a mare like that myself. If I like her, would you consider selling her?”
Hawk handed his bowl to Suzette. “None of our horses are for sale. Come on if you’re coming.”
“I can pay top price,” Gardner said as he followed Hawk out of camp.
“We don’t need your money.” Josie barely caught Hawk’s reply before he and Gardner were swallowed up by the night.
“I don’t trust that man,” Zeke said.
“You don’t have to trust him,” Josie said, impatient with Zeke’s dislike of Gardner. “He’s not offering you a job.”
“You don’t know that he has any jobs to offer.”
Zeke gathered up the bowls. Josie wondered if he’d leave Gardner’s, but he finally picked it up.
“If he can’t give us the jobs he promised, we’ll find someone who can. Now if you want me to help you clean up, let’s go.”
“I don’t understand it,” Zeke said, disgusted, as he followed Josie toward the river. “A man just has to be rich and good-looking and women believe everything he says.”
“We like them tall with broad shoulders.” Josie knew she shouldn’t intentionally annoy Zeke, but his dislike of Gardner was getting on her nerves. “It’s even better when they’re single.” She glanced back at Zeke. “Everybody knows that single men never lie to women.” She nearly laughed aloud at his outraged expression.
“I know what I’m talking about. I’ve seen too many men like Gardner,” he said.
“I’ve probably seen more men than you’ll see in your lifetime.” Josie reached the edge of the river and squatted down to rub sand in her bowl and the pot they’d used to cook the stew. “There’s nothing you can tell me about men I don’t already know.”
“You’ve only seen them from the stage or in a protected situation,” Zeke said as he knelt down beside her. “I’ve ridden with them in cattle drives, worked with them on nearly every kind of job a man can do, worked for them when they thought they were too good to do the work themselves. I know what they’re really like, not what they want you to think when they’ve had a bath and changed their clothes.”
“Are you going to clean those bowls, or are you going to keep trying to convince me that Gardner is too dangerous to talk to?”
Zeke tossed a handful of wet sand in each of three bowls. “Dammit, Josie, I don’t care if you sit up all night talking to Gardner. I just don’t want you to trust him.”
“I trust you.”
“No, you don’t.” Zeke looked across the river to where stars were beginning to show in the sky above the Galiuro Mountains. “You wouldn’t be here if Suzette hadn’t twisted your arm.”
Josie didn’t know whether Zeke’s feelings had been hurt by her reluctance or whether he was jealous. “Look, I don’t understand why you’re so upset about Gardner, but it’s not like I’m running off with him. It’s not even a question of whether I like him. The man has said he can give me a job.”
“I know, but—”
“If he can give me a job, fine. If he can’t, that’s fine, too. Any relationship between us will be strictly a business arrangement.”
“For men like Gardner, there’s no such thing as a strictly business arrangement when it comes to women. He’ll expect you to be properly appreciative.”
Josie rose to her feet with an irritated grunt and walked to the edge of the river to wash the sand out of the pot. “I’ve always wondered what it would be like to have a protective older brother. Now I know.”
She knew from the silence behind her that she’d said something wrong. She turned to see Zeke staring at her with the saddest eyes she’d ever seen. Much to her surprise, her irritation faded. She didn’t mean to argue with him all the time. She didn’t like to keep pushing him away so that he thought she hated him. He was bossy and had a touchy temper, but she was no angel herself. He and Hawk had changed their plans to make sure she and Suzette reached Tombstone safely. Unlike nearly every other man she knew, he expected to help with the cooking and the cleaning up. He was really a rather nice man. She wouldn’t mind having him around if he didn’t upset her so much.
“Suzette has had even more experience than I have,” she said when Zeke continued to stare at her, “and she doesn’t see anything wrong with Gardner.”
Zeke moved to the edge of the river to wash the sand from the bowls. She was prepared for him to argue, to tell her she didn’t know what she was talking about, even to say no woman could take care of herself. She wasn’t prepared for silence. Hawk was the silent one. Zeke could carry on a conversation with a cactus.
“Are you so angry at me you can’t even talk to me?”
“No.” He spoke without looking up from the muddied water. “I just don’t have anything else to say.” He stepped farther into the river and rinsed the bowls and the pot in clear water. Zeke kept rinsing the bowls again and again until there couldn’t possibly be a grain of sand or a speck of food adhering to them. She found his silence almost as upsetting as his constant irritability.
“Okay, what do you want me to do?” she asked, her voice rising in frustration.
“Just be careful,” he replied in an uncharacteristically quiet voice. “You ready to go back?”
She wanted to take a long walk to get away from the most confusing and frustrating man she’d ever met, but that wasn’t a wise choice, so she settled for going back to camp. “Suzette’s probably wondering whether I’ve fallen into the river and been swept away.”
“No, she’s not. She knows your big brother is here to protect you.”
It hit her like a smack in the face. Josie didn’t believe for one minute Zeke was in love with her—or even liked her very much—but no man wanted to feel like a woman’s brother. He wanted to believe she thought he was strong, virile, exciting, possibly even a little dangerous. Saying he was like a brother practically emasculated him.
But having hurt his feelings, she didn’t know how to go about apologizing without making it worse. She’d never been around a man like Zeke. She didn’t really know what went on inside his head. At first she’d thought he was just a big showoff. But even though she’d only known him for a few days, she’d discovered there was much more to him than she had guessed. She had to find a way to let him know she hadn’t meant to hurt him.
“Suzette and I trust you and Hawk to make sure nothing happens to us. I don’t know why you decided to let us travel with you, but I know it’s not what you wanted to do.”
Zeke walked out of the river. But instead of heading back to the camp, he stopped in front of her. “Hawk was convinced you’d never make it to Tombstone without running into trouble.”
“Do you always go along with what Hawk wants?”
At first he seemed angry at what she implied, but that faded quickly to be replaced by something like sadness.
“Hawk and I are brothers, and not just because we were adopted together. I do things because he wants, and he does things because I want. I know people don’t like or trust us because we’re different. But no matter what happens, no matter how great the danger, I know I can count on him to cover my back. We’ve been each other’s best friend for twenty-three years. Yes, I’d do anything for Hawk just because he wanted it.”
Josie didn’t know what to say. She’d never met two people who’d developed such a close, trusting, and giving relationship. She had thought it wa
s impossible. Yet as hard as it was for her to understand, she believed Zeke. He had spoken easily and directly—from the heart.
“I wish I had somebody I felt that way about,” Josie said.
“You won’t as long as you fight with people who try to help you.”
The truth of Zeke’s words was like a stab of pain. Josie was embarrassed by her behavior, frightened by how close Zeke had come to the truth. She had been afraid to trust people, so she’d used them, making her almost as bad as her father. But she’d had no other choice. She did it to survive. She spun on her heel and headed back to camp. She probably ought to ask Gardner to accompany them to Tombstone so Zeke and Hawk could go straight to their ranch.
But she wouldn’t do that. Despite their inability to be together without fighting, she trusted Zeke. She didn’t trust Gardner’s silver tongue, but that didn’t mean she wouldn’t use his interest in her to get a job. Life wasn’t easy for women who entertained miners.
“Where’s Zeke?” Suzette asked when Josie returned to the campsite alone.
“Probably trying to forget he ever met me.”
Suzette was seated close to the fire, her knees drawn up under her chin, her arms wrapped around her legs. “Is it possible for you two not to fight for the rest of this trip? Hawk says we ought to reach Benson in four days. From there we could make it to Tombstone by ourselves.”
Josie strode around the fire, her skirt swishing angrily around her legs. “I’m sure Zeke wouldn’t fight if I didn’t drive him to it.”
Suzette’s gaze narrowed. “I’ve never seen you act like this.”
Josie stopped in her tracks. “You make it sound like a lovers’ quarrel.”
Suzette’s smile was wry. “I certainly hope this isn’t how you’ll act when you fall in love.”
The Mavericks Page 11