by Zoey Derrick
“I came to see you,” he says clearly, not drunk.
“You do realize I have a daughter asleep in the house right now and it’s the middle of the night?” I make sure my little southern twang is in my voice. If I let my normal voice, sans accent, come out, he just might put two and two together.
“Yeah,” he says as he runs his hand through his hair. It’s not tied back tonight, just loose flowing down his back. Little kinks in it from it being pulled up earlier. Jesus, he’s fucking gorgeous. Black jeans, boots, white t-shirt under his cut. I lick my lips. “About that?”
“What about it, Loki?” My defenses rise immediately and I try not to let it come out through in my voice.
“She’s a gorgeous little girl.”
My eyes flutter closed. Hearing those words from his lips melts every hardened part of my soul. “Thank you,” I manage to say through gritted teeth.
He doesn’t seem to notice. “What’s her name?”
“Loki, come on, it’s the middle of the night.”
He gets a little flustered before his eyes bore into mine. “I’m leaving in the morning. Club business. I just wanted to see you before I left.” He turns to leave.
“Wait,” I say as I move down the three little steps from my door and into the grass. He stops and turns back toward me. My heart is overruling my brain right now and as much as I want to be pissed off at him for all the shit he’s put me through, he looks so sad and broken that it hurts my heart.
I stop, just a few feet in front of him, and he closes the distance between us. He presses his forehead to mine. “I’m gonna be back next week.”
I put my hands on his biceps, holding myself to him. “Okay?” I can’t withhold the skepticism from my voice. “Are you afraid I’m not gonna be here or something?” I ask.
“I’d deserve that,” he mutters, his voice so low I’m not sure it was intended for me to hear. Unfortunately, I can’t argue with that statement.
“I’m not goin’ anywhere,” I breathe.
His eyes come to mine, searching, asking, begging. I don’t know, but they’re desperate for something. Answers maybe. My heart freezes, then kicks up in double time as I feel like spilling everything to him. Explaining it all.
He gently kisses the tip of my nose, something he always did to me when I was a kid. I don’t know if he’s ever done it to anyone else, or if he’s figured out who I am. I let my eyes flutter closed briefly and then he’s pulling back from me. “Wait for me,” he whispers as he steps out of my hold and turns back to his bike.
My heart is pounding so hard and so loud in my chest that it’s halfway to China before I catch up to it. He kicks over the engine on his bike and takes off. He goes a little ways before turning around and roaring back down the street toward his house.
It takes until I hear the roar of another bike, this time from the right, to I get my feet moving. The last thing I need is Pyro coming down the street and seeing me standing here like an idiot.
I race for my door and manage to make it inside before the bike goes roaring past. Though he doesn’t stop, I see his head turn in the direction of my house as he flies past.
Somehow, I made it from the front door to my room and a shower before wrapping myself in Loki’s old t-shirt and climbing into bed.
That night the dreams come at me in rapid, vivid detail.
Changing from Sticks, my friends and Boulder, to Loki, Roswell, then finally landing on Pyro. But it’s not Pyro I’m looking at when the dream ends abruptly and I bolt upright on the bed.
I couldn’t get back to sleep after that. Just before six in the morning and I pad quietly through the house to the kitchen where I make coffee. My mind bounces from six years ago, to now, and back again.
If you didn’t know better, Big Daddy or Sticks could be my father. The three of them, despite the large age gaps between them, all look the same. They have the same eyes, Kellen’s eyes, and I keep trying to figure out if either one, Big Daddy or Sticks, had any sons who would be old enough. I know Sticks doesn’t. He and his wife never had kids. But Devon – Big Daddy D – on the other hand… I debate picking up the phone and calling Sticks to ask, but it’s too early for that.
I pour myself a cup of coffee and return to standing in the patio window in the dining room looking out at the open field behind my house. I’m so zoned out that I didn’t even hear Emily come into the kitchen, she makes me jump and I spill coffee on the floor.
“I’m sorry, Lily,” she murmurs as she grabs a towel from the counter. “I didn’t think you were up.”
“No, it’s fine, it’s my fault,” I tell her as I take the towel from her. “I’ll get it.” I kneel and wipe the floor. “You’re up early,” I remark.
She shakes her head. “I’m usually up this early, gives me a chance to shower and get ready before Piper wakes up.”
I give her a sad smile. “You should have told me no,” I mutter.
She cocks her head. “No to what?”
“Moving down here. You’re so young, Emily. You shouldn’t have to be tied to my daughter like this.” Thinking of my brother has me in a melancholy mood.
She smiles at me. “I love your daughter, Lily. She’s a joy to be around and I like having a steady job. Most people I know my age can’t say the same thing.”
I nod in understanding. “I just don’t want you to feel like I’m holding you back from something.”
She shakes her head. “You’re not.”
“If I ever start to, will you tell me?” I ask her.
She nods and smiles. “Besides, you said I could go to school if I wanted to.”
I smile at her and ask, “Have you found something?”
She nods again. “I’d like to check out Roswell Community.”
“Get me the information, we’ll make it happen,” I tell her.
“Thank you, Lily.” She smiles wider, her whole face lighting up with excitement. She’s a great kid. Shit, she’s only a few years younger than I am, but I feel so much older than I am, so she’ll stay a kid in my eyes. “I’m gonna hit the shower,” she tells me as she pours herself some coffee.
“What’s your plan today?” I ask.
“I need to go to the store while Piper’s at school, or I could wait and go after and bring her with me. If you’d like?”
I nod. “I’m gonna end up passing out again soon.” I can feel the weight of sleeplessness already. “I’m working tonight. I’m gonna be working Wednesday through Saturday, six to close,” I tell her.
“Okay, that will work.” She smiles before heading down the hallway to the bathroom and her shower.
My mind wanders away from my brother to Emily and going to school. If she goes Monday through Thursday, I can make that work, as long as she has a morning class on Thursday. I can get up and take care of Pipes on those days. Having Sundays, Mondays and Tuesdays off will really help. I hate being away from Piper so much.
The roar of bikes catches my attention. My eyes land on the clock. Its seven fifteen in the morning and I move to the front window to see who’s coming down the street. The sound draws closer from my left, its two bikes. Then I see Loki in the lead followed by Pyro. They’re both wearing road vests that have Wicked Angels written on the back, but no colors, no patches. I take a deep breath. Both of them are riding together. A few days without drama will be really nice around here.
“Mommy.” I turn to see Pipes still rubbing her eyes.
“Hi, baby, you’re up really early,” I say as I go over to her after setting my coffee cup on the table. She yawns. “Come on,” I tell her and I lead her down the hallway. “Em, I’m gonna snuggle with Piper,” I tell her as we pass.
“Okay,” she says and I take Piper into my room. She climbs up on my bed and I follow behind her, wrapping my arms around her. She’s laying on her back under me. She grabs a chunk of my hair and she starts playing with it. Something she’s done since she was a baby and breastfeeding. It brings me as much comfort as it does her and
she dozes off. I nuzzle my face closer to hers, breathing in her fresh Piper scent and fall asleep shortly after.
This time, I don’t dream.
Chapter Nine
LOKI
We roll into Boulder about six o’clock, after stopping outside of town to fill up and swap our road vests for our cuts before rolling up to the clubhouse. It’s Friday night, which means the clubhouse is full of bikers and bitches when we step in the main door.
It takes only a few minutes before Sticks comes out of his office and pulls us back with him.
The closer we got to Boulder, the more agitated Pyro got and I’m not entirely sure why. Whatever is biting his ass is pissing me off. He’s not normally this irritated. He usually lets shit just roll off his back and there’s nothing I can possibly think of that would piss him off this much.
By the time we step into Sticks’ office, the tension is rolling off him in waves and I want to put him through a wall.
“What’s crawled up your ass?” Sticks asks Pyro.
Pyro just narrows his eyes and shakes his head, but says nothing further.
“Where is she?” I ask Sticks.
“Who you talkin’ ‘bout?” Sticks plays dumb, but I know he knows damn well who I’m talking about.
I glare at him, “Kiwi, where is she?”
He puts his hands up in defense. “She’s long gone, man. Rolled outta here about a year ago.” His voice is calm. I have no reason to doubt him, but Pyro growls at him. After Pyro asked me about talking to Pixie, I got to thinking about it and it’s been more than a year since I called up here to check on her. So Sticks’ answer doesn’t surprise me.
“Bullshit,” Pyro snaps.
“What’s up your ass? What the fuck you care where some broad is?” Sticks bites back at Pyro. I can’t say I blame him.
Pyro slams Sticks against the wall, hand in his shirt. “Where is she?”
“Fuck, Pyro, what the hell, man?” I try pulling him off Sticks but he just rolls his eyes at me.
“Gone for fuck’s sake. She moved on, moved away.”
“Where?” I ask him.
“What the hell do you care? You were here once, asswipe, and you left her.” Now I can see Sticks is pissed as fuck. He glares at me and then shifts his eyes to Pyro. But Pyro’s eyes are on me instead. The same murderous glare that was directed at Sticks a second ago is now pointed at me.
“What the fuck did you do to her?” Pyro snaps, releasing Sticks and moving in on me.
“Fuck you,” I growl at him, ready to throw down. “What the fuck you care? You abandoned her,” I remind him.
“Both of you, knock it the fuck off,” Sticks says in a tone that makes us both cringe. “Or I’ll throw you both the fuck out of here, and trust me, there’s some nice piece of ass coming in tonight and you don’t want to miss it.”
I roll my eyes. Sticks’ solution to everything is a fine piece of ass.
“I mean it, she’s gone. She rolled up out of here, looking for something more from life. Last I heard she was headed for Kansas City. She’s an adult, perfectly capable of taking care of herself.” He sits down in his chair behind his desk. “But don’t let that fool you two fuck-knuckles. There ain’t a man in that room out there that won’t throw down for her, so you two better get your shit together and quit fighting about this shit before you drag it out of my office and get yourselves dead, you get me?”
We both turn to look at Sticks. “You were supposed to keep her out of the club,” I remind him.
He shrugs. “There ain’t nothing you can stop that girl from doing once she puts her mind to it. She came up here after Tryke died.” I don’t miss Pyro’s stiffening at the mention of Tryke’s name but I let it go. “She needed a place to crash, I gave her one. She needed a job, I gave her one. When she was ready to leave, I let her go. She survived five years up here and she did it without much help from me. She made friends with the right group of people and wormed her way into the hearts of every biker in this house.”
“She has a way of doing that,” I mutter.
Pyro relaxes a little as Sticks tells us what’s what.
After one final stare down between the three of us, we move on to business. Discussing our purpose for being here.
It’s the better part of two hours before we’re armed with all the information we need and we finally join the party in the main room of the clubhouse. We’re to leave here in the morning and get down to Tucson where we fill Big Daddy in on all that Sticks knows and what we’ve learned over the last several months. Neither Big Daddy nor Sticks trusts the phone lines. He’ll cover for us up here while we journey south. From there we will return home, but not before we establish our plan for taking down Rooster. At this point, the only thing that will take him down is a bullet between the eyes and Pyro will be more than happy to care of it.
Kiwi’s disappearance isn’t a good thing.
She’s wanted revenge against Rooster since the night Tryke died. If she gets wind of what’s doin’ she’s gonna be all over him like white on rice and I can’t say I blame her one bit.
Rooster ordered the hit, Gunnar carried it out. Well, made sure it was carried out, and Kiwi is gunning for both of them.
Pyro and I start mingling amongst the other members and club whores.
PYRO
Loki occupies himself with a club whore and I slip back down the hall, finding Sticks’ door and knocking.
“Enter,” comes from the other side and I open the door and step inside. Our eyes meet.
“Hello, Reggie,” I say in a menacing tone that puts his guard up instantly.
“Not many people know that name…”
“Family, right?”
He nods, shell shocked by my being in here and using his real name. “What do you want, Pyro?” he asks as he stands up.
I cock my head. “I’m not here to hurt you if that’s what you’re afraid of. She’s lost enough in her life. She doesn’t need to lose you, too.”
“What’s your beef with Lily, Pyro?” For the first time in six years, that name grates on a few nerves and I try and shake it off.
“Where is she, Reggie?”
He narrows his eyes at me. “I think you already know the answer to that question, you’re just hoping I’ll confirm it for you.”
I flick my zippo, the sound causing Sticks to jump a little. “Maybe, maybe not,” I whisper.
“Then why ask the question? What do you want with her?”
“What I wanted for her was a club free life. It’s what she was supposed to get by coming up here. Instead, you hand her exactly what she wanted.”
“And that’s what, exactly?”
“Revenge,” I breathe.
Chapter Ten
LILY
The weekend passes with no sign of Loki or Pyro.
I finished my shift on Saturday night, went home and climbed into bed without incident. Emily made plans for Sunday, knowing it was my day off and I was going to want to spend as much of it with Piper as humanly possible. When I asked her what her plans were, she laughed and told me she was going to be a Roswell tourist. I laughed a little harder after that. She deserves a day off and I get to spend the day with Piper. Win-win.
Piper and I made cookies, sang silly songs and watched movies until it was time for her to go to bed or rather, until she passed out on the couch with her head on my lap. Being with Piper, just the two of us, makes me miss Boulder a little more. Sure, I had a bigger support system up there, between the old ladies, a couple of the girls I worked with and Sticks, but I had to practically runaway with Piper to spend time alone with her. Down here, I have more time with her, but I’m working more. It’s a job I love and yet it’s unnecessary financially and it irks me to leave her.
Monday afternoon, while sitting down to do homework with Piper, my phone rings, it’s Loni.
“Hey boss,” I say when I answer the phone.
“Hey, sorry to call on your day off.”
“No w
orries, you need me?” I ask.
“Not today, but the clubhouse is throwing a shindig tomorrow for a visiting club and we need all the girls we can get.” I shudder. This is my least favorite part about being a bar back.
“What time?”
I hear her sigh in relief. “Seven, the clubhouse. You know where it’s at?”
“I do. What time you want me there?” I ask her.
“Can you come at six?” she asks, and I can tell she’s reluctant about it.
“I’ll be there.”
“You’re a lifesaver, Skit.”
I smile. “No problem. See you tomorrow.”
“Thanks again,” she says and we disconnect.
“Em,” I call and she comes into the living room. “I have to work tomorrow night. I don’t know what time I’ll be home,” I tell her and it’s the truth. Early on, in Boulder, I would do club parties and I would often crawl home around nine or ten in the morning.
“No problem.” She smiles. “Pipes and I are gonna go see a movie on Wednesday after school.”
“Yeah,” Piper says excitedly.
“You’re a lifesaver,” I tell her.
“Don’t forget, she needs to get registered for dance class.”
“Shit!”
“Mommy!” Piper snaps at me.
“Sorry, baby,” I tell her with a smile. I look back at Emily. “Thank you, I will take care of it.” I’d completely forgotten and classes start in just a couple weeks.
Tuesday comes, still no sign of Loki or Pyro.
As the day drawls on, I’m more and more relieved that Loki hasn’t driven past my house. I’m hoping like hell he doesn’t show up tonight, but I’m not sure I can get that lucky.
I went to the dance school this morning and got Piper all signed up. She starts the middle of next month, giving me just a little over a month to handle what I need to take care of. Registering her implies that I’m staying here. It might not be a bad idea, but we might not have much choice.