by Kyra Gregory
Her shoulders dropped. All those swearing to protect her with their lives, willing to die for her… She wished she could be worthy of such affection—worthy beyond that of a Queen. “Would that I did not require you in my service,” she said, shaking her head, “for I would not be able to cope if you died because of something that I had planned.”
“You needn’t think about it,” Gyles said, brushing her hair out of her face. “I’m alive and as well as I may possibly be,” he said.
She sighed, looking somewhat as unconvinced as she felt. “What of the pirates?” she asked, wiping her damp cheeks. “Were you really treated well by them?”
“Yes,” he said. Such a single word was filled with so much uncertainty; although, it was not that it was not the truth, but that Gyles seemed to fear it to be known. He shifted his weight from one knee to the other, slipping into a distant place with just his thoughts before snapping back to reality, looking into her eyes once more. He licked his lips, adding, “Such that I cannot help but be concerned for whatever it is you’ve planned next for them.” Sybelle recoiled and raised an eyebrow at him, both with surprise and interest in his thoughts, hoping that he would enlighten her with them as he always had. “You’ve given them the Azurian ships that have plagued our ports,” he noted, “and that gives them an advantage over our navy,” he said, wearily, “and I don’t know you to give an enemy something of worth for no reason at all.”
Sybelle sighed, reclining in her seat, “You’re right,” she said. “Frankly, the easiest thing for me to do would be to kill them all now, sparing myself any trouble once they have done what I’ve asked of them,” she said. She could practically hear his breathing cease and she couldn’t help but wonder what happened on those ships that caused him to grow so fond of the outlaws. “But,” she continued, willing herself to be patient, “it may be advantageous to do otherwise,” she said. She waved a hand before tapping her chin lightly, “After all, they were agreeable and did as I desired; I shouldn’t think to throw that away so easily,” she added.
“What will you do then?” Gyles asked with interest, leaning in with a forward curiosity that was somewhat unlike him.
She said nothing to that, unwilling to reply until she’d given it a bit more thought. She squeezed his hands, patting them before pulling herself out of her seat.
“Leave me alone with my thoughts,” she said, sighing as she made her way down the hall. “I’ll consult with you before I make any decisions, I promise.”
Looking around as nobody went to follow her, as per her instructions, Gyles stared after her with furrowed brows, flooded with confusion towards her actions. Although much had changed since Gyles had left for Evrad, Sybelle remained much the same—her cunning flourished, and her intentions remained her own.
CHAPTER 18
GYLES SAT AT Deros’s side for some time, overlooking the dressing of his wounds with a mild curiosity as to why he was kept alive for so long by the Azurian King. He shifted from a chair in the corner of the small, cold infirmary, having kept his distance to leave the physician to do all he needed, using guards for assistance in moving him, to the stool closest to the bed where he could better observe him. Left alone, in absolute silence, he was comforted to hear the man’s breathing, however laboured it may have been, for the sight of him was not enough to convince him that he was still a part of this world.
He looked remarkably different from the man he’d first met. He’d known little of him but his reputation preceded him. He knew him to be a cruel man, one capable of committing sickening deeds to see any mission he was set upon by King Nero to completion. He was strong back then, with his head held high and with not an ounce of fear within his chest to rival his will to succeed. Now... Well, now, he looked as though so much as a breeze from the open window was enough to send his spirit to the furthest corners of their world, to places that his body was far too weak to ever follow it to.
And, yet, his eyes opened just enough to remind him that he was not yet dead. He stared at him. He stared without a blink for so long that he was coming to think otherwise once more; that his soul had left him, his eyes open just enough to watch its disappearance. Then the blink came. A single tear rolled down Deros’s cheek, his skin marred with blue and purple bruises, some old enough to have started to yellow with age.
Gyles swallowed, looking around himself for anything he could do to help. He grabbed a jug from the table beside the bed with an eagerness that had him spilling some water onto himself, pouring some of the contents into a cup. “You should drink,” he said, his voice cracking in a low whisper. “The physician said so,” he added.
He placed the cup to Deros’s lips and slipped an arm beneath his back, lifting him just enough for him to take a much-needed gulp of water. He laid him back down, standing beside him with a pang of concern in his chest as he watched his chest rise and fall at an alarming pace, a permanent grimace on his face.
“You have a few cracked ribs,” he said, sitting back down beside him, “two, maybe three, the physician said. It’ll hurt to breathe for a little while.”
Deros glanced over, moving as little of himself as possible but making it a point to show him the half-smile he’d mustered in thanks.
“Do you need anything?” Gyles asked, wide-eyed. “Should I call the physician back?”
Deros closed his eyes, shaking his head. His fingers on his right hand twitched and he reached for his ribs on his left side before he tried to sit up. Gyles leapt out of his seat, reaching for his shoulders. “You probably shouldn’t do that,” he said. “You could hurt yourself and, if you do, it’s likely I won’t be able to help you,” he said, mustering a laugh. Deros was stubborn, at least that much hadn’t changed, and Gyles forced himself to sit on the edge of the bed at his side, leaving his hand on his shoulder to keep him from making another attempt. His skin was burning hot to the touch, red and burnt, radiating heat even now, away from the scorching sun that the daytime brought. He realised, soon enough, that he could remove his hand, no doubt to the man’s relief; Deros had neither the strength nor the tolerance for the pain to lift himself again. Nonetheless, he remained seated on the bed, even after he retracted his hand from his bare shoulder.
Gyles bowed his head, allowing silence to fall over the room once again. His brows furrowed together and he licked his lips, forcing himself to speak, “I’m sorry,” he said. Deros looked over in his direction, the movement causing Gyles to look at him, noting his confusion at the sudden apology. He bit his tongue and nodded, repeating himself, “I’m sorry for what I did to you,” he said. “I sent your ex-lover, and your daughter, to you for reasons that were all too selfish.” That had Deros interested, glancing at him with intrigue in his eyes. Gyles wrung his hands together, staring at them, “I despised how close you had gotten to her,” he said, his jaw tense, “and I did not trust your intentions towards her. I thought, perhaps, if she knew of your ex-lover and child, if you hadn’t told her about them, that she would separate from you and break that trust you had formed.”
“You care about her,” Deros whispered, his voice raspy.
“Very, very much,” Gyles whispered, appearing almost ashamedly so.
“Your reason is not so selfish then,” Deros said, turning his head to look out the window. “You care about her, you acted in her interest. I cannot fault you for that.”
“You can and you should,” Gyles retorted, his hands tightening around one another. “You should be livid. You should despise me for what I did; you asked me to do something for you, out of concern for your loved ones, and I betrayed you.”
“And I betrayed Sybelle,” Deros whispered, locking eyes with the man as he made the admission, bringing all he’d thought to words. “You were right not to trust me,” he said. “And, above that, I cannot be livid at the man who would’ve protected her with all his heart in my absence.”
Gyles sighed, running his fingers through his hair before looking at him, uttering a confession, “I on
ce thought the same,” he said. “I know your feelings to be genuine, however misguided your manner of showing them may be,” he added. Deros’s lips tugged into a smile and Gyles couldn’t help the momentary thrill fill his chest. He clapped his hands together, pulling himself upright when he realised he’d leaned into the man to the point that his back had started to ache, “Shall I call the physician?”
“The physician will be returning shortly,” Sybelle said. Gyles looked to the doorway, finding the Queen, now of the Three Kingdoms, leaning against the doorway with her hands clasped together against her crimson-coloured frock. She lifted herself from the archway and made her way inside with grace, her head held high with confidence while the manner in which she played with her fingers told of her more nervous disposition. “I would have a moment alone with him, if you don’t mind,” she said.
Gyles looked to Deros and saw the resignation in his eyes. Deros forced a smile, allowing him to leave while knowing that he’d come to terms with this. Gyles got to his feet and went to walk past Sybelle, pausing at her side with the door still in his sights. “How long had you been standing there?” he asked.
“A while,” Sybelle murmured in reply, never taking her eyes off Deros.
Sybelle stood over Deros for some time, staring at him. He was such a different man when he’d left her. He was so proud at the time, so strong and so determined. She should have known then but she hadn’t because that was the man he’d always been, even when she’d broken him down in her dungeons. He was nothing like he was now. He was worse. She could see just above his chest; his skin was burnt from hours in the scorching sun and the only things to contrast that pink hue were the purple bruises that littered his face, neck and arms. His wrists were no better; the skin there had been rubbed raw, no doubt from all the struggling he must have done against the ropes that bound him. But, strangely, she did not see him as the type to struggle in the face of his enemy, leaving her to wonder what he must have endured in the week he’d spent as a prisoner to the Azurian King.
She licked her lips, exhaling, “You should get some sleep,” she said. She was ready to turn away and leave and forget that she ever wished to discuss anything with the man.
“I’ve slept,” he replied, licking his own lips. His eyes began to flood with emotion; a sight she hadn’t seen in a long time. “I’ve slept and had...horrible nightmares, only to wake up to a reality that is far, far worse.”
She knew what he meant. He did not want to be here. In truth, nor did she. Not when there was betrayal to be discussed.
Her brows twitched to furrow together but she looked elsewhere in the room, taking quiet steps around the bed, “Did you not have faith in me?” she asked, hurt evident in her broken voice.
“On the contrary,” he replied. “I thought I truly must be foolish to so blindly have so much faith in a single person.”
Sybelle crossed her arms against her chest, using her hands to caress her own shoulders in a calming embrace. “You shouldn’t have done what you did,” she said, circling the bed again. She held her head up high, refusing to look at him as she swallowed and pulled back the tears. “You shouldn’t have gone against my instruction.”
“I thought I was doing the right thing,” Deros whispered.
Sybelle laughed, surprising him, as she placed the back of her fingers to her damp cheek. She nodded, showing him her smile, “I know,” she said. “I know you did.” She sat down beside him on the bed, placing her hand over his as it protected his wounded side. She laughed all the more as he stared at her with a startled gaze, “How can I fault you for being so misguided?” She caressed his cheek with the back of her fingers, using the lightest touch she could manage so as not to hurt him, “It’s my own fault,” she said. “Though I trusted you with all my heart I chose not to keep you involved as I should have,” she said. “It’s my own fault if you did not think my methods would be successful.”
“You’re wrong,” he said. His eyelids fell shut. A grimace crossed his features and she wondered what it was that was causing him the most pain. “I’ve always had faith in you. But, even then, I couldn’t take the risk. I couldn’t do nothing and risk the invasion. I couldn’t allow them to get to you.”
Sybelle shook her head. She didn’t want to argue any longer. Far from it. She placed her forehead against his shoulder, breathing against his skin, “I don’t care anymore. All that matters is that you’re here and that you’re safe. I care for nothing more than that.”
He went silent. She withdrew to find him looking at her with confusion in his eyes. “Why do you still care? I betrayed you,” he whispered.
She scoffed, throwing her hand up, “You’re different,” she said, her confession causing her to smile. “Somehow, I feel as though I can forgive anything you do, only because your intentions at the time were good.” She brushed her thumb against the corners of his lips, smiling, “You’re different, Deros,” she said.
“I’ve betrayed you,” he said, his words filled with self-loathing. “I’ve betrayed you and you would make me the only one to cause such a grievance and live,” he said.
“Consider it your punishment,” she said, withdrawing slightly, her hand cupping his cheek. He shook his head, but she only became more adamant, choosing to make her words louder than his thoughts. “You will have to live with what you’ve done to me,” she said, stifling a grin, “and you will have to make it up to me with your service once you’ve regained your strength.”
Deros shook his head, still confused, “You would have us go on as usual, as we were before I left,” he remarked.
“I want for nothing else,” she whispered, nodding.
“You’re a Queen,” he whispered, shaking his head. “You’re a Queen—powerful and intelligent in her own right; you could want for anything in this world.”
Sybelle nodded, “And, yet, I want what I cannot—and won’t—take by force,” she said.
“And you need never do so,” Deros whispered, struggling to push himself to sit up. Sybelle thought to force him back down but she soon found herself entranced by the manner in which he looked at her. It caused flutters of emotion within her chest every time. It was this look in his eyes, so much love and devotion for her, that made her certain that things could go back to the way they were before he left. “My life is to be spent in your service or there is no life left for me at all,” he said.
Sybelle shook her head and took his face in her hands, a smile growing onto her lips, “Your life is not solely yours to give up,” she said.
“Your Majesty,” a guard intruded, a knock light on the door to gain her attention to him. “You’re due for your meeting with the pirates,” he said.
Sybelle gripped Deros’s hand as he laid himself back down. “I don’t want to leave you,” she whispered.
He squeezed her hand back, bringing it to his lips in a show of support before letting her go. “Please, you must,” he said, “I would not be the reason you dishonour your agreement.”
Sybelle laughed, taking his hand and kissing the back of his fingers, saddening somewhat at the sight of his raw and broken skin. “I am Queen of Lionessa, of Evrad, and of Azura; they may be left waiting a little while longer.” She pressed her lips to his and she could feel him relax beneath her. As her long, brown hair fell over her shoulder, it shielded her, momentarily, from the prying eyes of her guards. She didn’t care for their judgement. She didn’t care for what they thought of her. She didn’t care for what they thought of him. In this moment, she was the most powerful woman that the world had ever known, bringing together three kingdoms, and she would have whatever she wanted. Her power was enough to give her that. Her power was enough to turn anything she touched into gold. It was with her touch that Deros would continue to be seen as a man of worth, and not the traitor he’d often portrayed himself to be. It was with this thought, with this surge of power running through her, that she forced herself to leave his side as he drifted into what she’d hoped to be a peacefu
l rest. She made her way down the corridors with her head held high and with power within her hands, within her thoughts and within her ideas.
CHAPTER 19
SYBELLE STOOD BEFORE the great Lionessan wall as the metal gate was raised and the large wooden doors were opened. Gyles stood at one side, tired but prepared, and Ewin stood at the other, soon to let his concerns be known. He leaned into her somewhat, keeping his voice low even when he uttered words that everybody knew, “Word has travelled that we have avoided the war with Azura, that the King and Queen are dead, but word has also travelled that you’ve allowed the pirates who assisted us to remain on our shores for a night,” he said.
“And?” Sybelle asked, never taking her eyes off the open passage out onto the beach.
“And,” Ewin started, “I don’t think it will ease their mind if you bring any one of them into our walls.”
“It’s but a single person,” she said. “They needn’t be concerned. Though, if they are, nothing should stop them from hauling themselves up in their homes until they are gone.”
Ewin cocked his head to one side. While he would always do his part in making sure Sybelle knew everything about her kingdom, he knew that it would be best to drop it once it was made apparent that she didn’t care for the matter in the slightest. With that, he withdrew and marched his men out of the gates.
They took their usual protective stance around her, one that she was always grateful for as they placed her life above their own and stood between her and potential danger. But, tonight, she hadn’t a single concern for her life and, with that, stepped out from between two of the armed guards.
Kieren, though always undeniably interested in her proposal, seemed to perk up in his place where he’d been seated on a barrel beside a fire, feasting on the morsels left by the Azurians. He licked his lips clean and clapped his hands together, dusting them in his dark green trousers as he forced himself onto his feet and trudged through the sand to approach her. He cleared his throat, glancing around once neither of them said anything. “So,” he started, “you had a proposal for us,” he said. “You’ve avoided the subject for so long that I’ve come to wonder if such a thing really exists.”