by Stacey Lynn
“So fuck her.” Ryan shrugged and swung, barely even lining up his shot and it still went farther and straighter than any of mine all morning.
“That’s the worst idea ever,” I said. “Not only because it would make everything worse between us, but because it’s not about us, it’s about Toby. And what if he gets hurt?”
“I’m going with Jordan on this one,” Shawn said.
I looked at him over my shoulder. “Thank you.”
“Although if you still want her, wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world to try to go after her, either. The question is whether you can get past all the other bullshit.”
“Bullshit?” I felt my brows slide up my forehead. “Hiding my son for ten years is bullshit?”
“No. But also, yeah…sort of. I get you’re mad. But you have a kid. A son who, from what you’ve said, sounds pretty damn cool. You figure out a way to get past why she did everything, then maybe you can finally get what you’ve always wanted.”
There was a massive problem with being friends with guys who had known you almost your whole life. Granted, Shawn didn’t move to Carlton until high school, but I’d still been friends with him when Destiny and I dated. Which meant he knew every single thing about me and made it impossible to hide the fact that for years, he knew everything I wanted was Destiny and a family with her.
“It’s not possible,” I muttered. “Let’s drop it and get through these buckets before I have to get to work. “
“When are you seeing her again?” Shawn asked. He removed his baseball hat from his head and swiped his light brown hair off his forehead before resettling his cap.
“Tonight,” I grumbled. I forced my left hand to relax on my grip. Rolled my shoulders to loosen them. “She and Toby are coming to my place for dinner.”
“Not just Toby?” Based on the tone in his voice, he was most definitely grinning at me.
No…not just Toby. I wanted Destiny to see my home. I wanted her to see what I’d made for myself. Why? So she’d be proud of me? So she’d trust me with Toby? To show off what she could have had if she would have trusted me?
It was probably all of those…but mostly, if I was willing to be honest with myself or my friends, it was because I wanted her in my home.
It was that simple.
“Shut up, Shawn.”
I swung the club as he and Ryan both laughed. And wouldn’t you know it? The damn ball went straight down the range, landing perfectly three hundred yards out. Right where I wanted it.
But everything Shawn said couldn’t be that simple, could it? There was no way to get over what she’d done. There was no way Destiny and I could ever be what I’d once dreamed we could be. We were too different.
There was too much between us, and most of it was from her lies and her fear.
I was willing to be the bigger person and act like I could push it to the side for Toby’s sake. But forgive her? Was it in any way possible?
I had no fucking clue, and the answer wasn’t going to be found on the driving range. It was going to be found by spending time with Destiny, seeing if there was any chance in hell we could piece back together any resemblance of a relationship years after she’d ripped it to shreds.
Twelve
Jordan
* * *
The doorbell rang, and I tossed the oven mitts to the kitchen counter, rushing to the front door. Good God, I was as nervous as I was the first time I ever took Destiny out on a date, alone in my pick-up truck hoping like hell a movie and a trip to Scone’s Cones would lead to us getting more comfortable in the cab of my truck with one long bench seat.
That didn’t happen that night. It took months before she allowed that and longer until she was ready for everything, but when she did, it had been beyond my wildest imagination.
Ever since I left the course, my mind had been half at work, half at tonight’s dinner. Maybe it was Ryan goading me to put my physical desires above the smartest decisions. Maybe it was Shawn’s hope saying something good actually came of this disaster. In any event, I was a fucking nervous wreck to have destiny and Toby in my house for the first time.
I flung open the door, and a whirlwind of dark hair that matched my own flipped through the air. My sister shoved me back as she entered the house.
Behind her, Cooper threw up his hands and followed. “Tried to stop her. She wouldn’t listen.”
“What the hell are you doing here?” I growled, closing the door behind them.
Rebecca grinned. “Can’t a girl stop by to see her brother?”
“Not when that brother has company coming over, which you know about because I told you.”
She laughed at my glare. My older sister was a pain in my ass. I also loved her more than life.
“Oh. Was that tonight?”
Her gaze flickered around my entryway and she bit her lip. I lost my glare and my shoulders relaxed as I caught her expression.
“You want to see him.” I yanked her to my chest and wrapped her in my arms.
“It’s killing me to wait,” she muttered against my shirt. “I won’t be mean. I promise.”
I hugged her tightly while she fought a hold on her emotions. Rebecca lost everything in a short amount of time. Until Cooper showed up last summer, I was worried I’d never get her back. Now, she was almost as wild and crazy as she’d always been before, with a slight edge to her that still slashed my gut. She carried a pain she was healing from, but it would never fully disappear.
I let her go and pushed her gently into Cooper’s waiting arms. He took my sister and curled her front to his side and kissed the top of her head.
“You’re such a brat. Be nice. Promise me you can do that and I’ll let you stay for a few minutes.”
Her brown eyes went wide and hopeful. I looked at Cooper to find him looking down at her, grinning like an idiot. It was his usual expression when it came to Rebecca.
“You’ll keep her in line?” I asked him.
He barked out a laugh. “Like that could ever happen.”
“Shit.” Whatever. I doubted my sister could be mean to someone with a kid in the room, although her barbs could sometimes be pretty passive aggressive, striking slowly but hitting their mark. The excitement in her eyes made me cave. When it came to Rebecca, I’d give her everything I could to keep her smiling and happy.
Little shit knew it too.
“Fine. They’ll be here any minute. Why don’t you go finish the salad I was making and check the lasagna?”
“Well that’s not very nice of you. Putting me to work when I’m a guest.”
“Yeah? How many times do I show up at your house and you do the same to me?”
Always. The answer was always. Not that I minded. That land had once been mine and it would have been impossible to go see her and not do work. Still, my point was made. She huffed indignantly and pushed out of Cooper’s arms, sauntering to the kitchen like she owned it. “Fine. I’ll do this. But you owe me.”
“I figure she owes me for showing up,” I said, dropping my voice so only Cooper could hear me.
“She’ll be good,” he said. “She’s been talking a lot this week about what you told her.”
After I left Destiny’s house Sunday night, I’d spent most free nights at her place with Toby, but I hadn’t spent the night again. Doing that once was hard enough, getting closer to her was detrimental. I figured after that day with Paul, she and Toby could use the time alone. I didn’t want to shove myself in his face so forcefully after he lost a man important to him. After he’d spent an hour or so pulling weeds, I’d taken him out front and we’d put together the basketball hoop.
I stayed for dinner and took off.
Tonight they were both coming to my house for dinner for the first time. Throughout the week, I’d also talked to Rebecca and told her everything I could, everything I knew. I also let her know they were sticking around a while with the hope she’d never leave. In order to do that, I needed Rebecca’s help in making D
estiny feel welcome.
At first, she’d choked on the thought. I hoped Cooper could bring her around. For her nephew’s sake at the very least.
“Yeah?” I said to him.
“She might not admit it, but I think in some small way, she respects Destiny for what she did.”
I was still working on getting past burning fury whenever I thought about it. Respect was a long way off. “Yeah? How so?”
“She walked away so you could have your dream of playing ball. She made that road easier for you knowing it was all you ever wanted, Jordan.” I opened my mouth to argue, but he cut me off. “She was wrong. She was misguided. She’s admitted that. But she was also scared out of her mind and young and stupid. She was thinking a lot about herself, but she was thinking of you, too.”
My lip twitched, and I barely fought back a snarl.
“Not saying you have to agree with that,” he kept going, clearly sensing my distress. “But that’s how your sister sees it. Destiny did what she did for you, and that, I think she respects regardless of what she kept from you.”
“Well if it stops her from being a bitch to Des, I’ll take it.”
“Know she’s your sister, Jordan, but watch it.” His glare hit me like a punch and I looked away. He was protective of Rebecca and I was glad she had that. Fucking thrilled. Still, I hated it when he put me in my place and he didn’t hesitate if he thought I was overstepping a line.
“Beer?” I asked on a growl.
He laughed and slapped my shoulder. “I’ll help myself. You might want to lose that murderous look on your face before she gets here, too, or it won’t be Rebecca scaring anyone off.”
“Asshole,” I muttered, but he still walked away laughing and shaking his head. I followed them down the hall into the kitchen and had just reached it when the doorbell rang again.
“They’re here!” Rebecca cried at my back. I had already spun around and was heading back to the door when Cooper told her to chill out.
I took several deep breaths on my way, and by the time I reached the door, the murderous tendencies Cooper mentioned had dissipated to a low boil.
“Hey,” I said, opening the door. “You made it.”
Instead of allowing them inside, knowing exactly what waited for them, I walked out to the front porch and closed the door behind me.
Destiny took a step back. Her hand curled over Toby’s shoulder. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.”
Her brow wrinkled in a cute, confused way. She was such a damn knock out. Dressed in pale blue shorts that showed off the length of her legs and a white top that clung to every curve, I had a hard time dragging my eyes to meet hers and when I finally managed, her cheeks were burning bright.
“I have some company,” I said, forcing my lips to lift into a grin and looked down at Toby. “Your aunt Rebecca and Cooper are inside.” My eyes slid to Destiny’s. “She showed up without warning, but she’s looking forward to seeing you.”
Destiny’s lip curled.
I grinned. Then I thought of what Cooper had told me and lost my grin and blew out a breath. “She’s excited to see Toby.”
“Cooper Hawke is in there?” Toby asked, his voice squeaky high with excitement. “Are you for real?”
“Yeah, little man. But around here, he’s just Cooper, you know? Just a man.”
“Yeah, a famous man.”
I laughed softly. “Just a man. And he’s a good one. Plus my sister. She couldn’t wait any longer to meet you, so I said they could stay for a few minutes.” I looked back to Destiny. The pink on her cheeks had turned pale and her eyes were stuck on my front door. “And if it’s okay with you, they can stay for dinner. I know it was only going to be us, but…”
I let that drag out. She was my sister.
Based on the way her back suddenly looked like her spine turned into a metal rod, she wasn’t all that up for it.
“It’ll be good,” I whispered, hopefully low enough so Toby couldn’t hear. “Promise.”
She blinked slowly and nodded. “Okay. Dinner with the family.” She grinned down at Toby and ruffled his hair.
“Mom—”
“It’ll be fine,” she said, more to herself than me.
Still, I stepped back and opened the door. Toby walked through, and I followed Destiny, my eyes immediately falling to her ass.
“Yeah,” I said, barely fighting back a groan of pleasure watching her hips sway in that womanly way as she entered my house for the first time. “It’ll be splendid.”
Her head whipped over her shoulder and I yanked my eyes up in the nick of time. “Are you okay?”
“Never better.”
I was in hell, was more like it. The more time I spent with her, the more I remembered the feel of her. The more I wanted to feel her again. She had filled out in perfect places, more woman than girl, more beautiful than cute. And every time her smile went wide, it made me think about all the good times we had.
I needed to get involved with Destiny like I needed a kick to the groin.
“It’s good, Des,” I said when she was still looking at me. “And I swear to you, tonight will be fine. If it’s not, I’ll handle it.”
“Let’s just get this over with,” she muttered, losing that cute look on her face and sliding straight to defeated.
And that was enough. I sat there listening to her the other night spewing shit about that Paul guy being better off without her, and I was tired of listening to her beat herself down.
I hadn’t helped a damn bit in a decade in being the one to build her up, but I was over hearing her kick herself down.
Soon, we’d have a very long conversation where once and for all, we’d put the past behind us. She fucked up. She did it for too damn long. But as long as she did the right thing now, that was most important.
And for the first time in a decade, I was sitting down to dinner with the only family I had, the entire family I had, and we were going to fucking enjoy it if I had to force everyone.
“Come on,” I said, my voice almost a snarl. This woman frustrated the hell out of me. “Dinner. Family. Drinks if you want them. Then if you want, Toby, we can take out the golf cart and cruise around the course. It’s pretty at night all lit up with the water fountains.”
“Cool,” he said, eyeing his mom and me. He clearly had picked up on the tension simmering between us.
Which is one more reason why we had to get past this. For him, if nothing else.
“Rebecca!” I called out. “You can stop pretending to hide now!”
“I’m not hiding,” she said, walking around the corner of the kitchen. “I was being patient.”
“Like hell,” I snorted.
Next to me, Toby grinned up at me. On my other side, Destiny shot me a look that looked like she could have been pleading for her life.
I shook my head at both of them and guided them toward my sister.
* * *
“Mom says there’s a team where I can travel around the state playing. She says one of the coaches already talked to her to see if I was interested in it.” That came from Toby, chatting incessantly and answering every single question Cooper and Rebecca asked him.
Granted the kid had responded more quickly to Cooper, but who could blame him. His celebrity starstruck self settled after the first few minutes, but dinner was almost over, and it was still obvious Toby was thrilled to be eating dinner with Cooper.
He slowly started opening up to Rebecca too, and I had to hand it to her, Rebecca was being nicer than I’d ever seen her. She was never the most open of the bunch, more reserved but full of pride and stubbornness. We got that from our mom. She’d done her part to include Destiny, but it was Cooper who drew her in.
Although the soft, girly look she gave him was annoying, even if he brushed it off. The man was probably used to women turning into fumbling messes around him. Hell, even I could tell Destiny was trying to act normal. Too normal. Too jittery. All through dinner she’d been a
half-minute away from completely falling at Cooper’s feet.
Which soured my mood so much that I was the one being quiet and sullen. The only girl I’d ever loved had a crush on my sister’s fiancé. Wasn’t that a kick in the nuts?
“That’s incredible,” Rebecca said, still talking to Toby. “You going to do it?”
“We’ll have to see,” Destiny said, cutting in. “We haven’t talked about it much, but it still shows his talent, even being invited.”
She grinned at her boy.
From across the table, she turned to me and her grin flat-lined. My look most likely matched my mood. All of it still meant they were heading back.
Rebecca pushed the conversation forward and grinned at Cooper. “We should get a basketball hoop at the ranch. We could settle one in between the barns where there’s that cement pad. It’d be the perfect spot, wouldn’t it?”
Cooper took a drink of his beer. “Sounds good to me.”
She looked down at Toby. “That’d be fun, wouldn’t it? And then when my friend’s kids come over, it gives them something else to do too.”
“Yeah. That’d be cool.” He shoved his garlic bread into his mouth and with a mouth full of food asked, “How old are they?”
“Toby—” Destiny whispered. She gestured with her hands for him to close his mouth.
He turned pink and glanced at Cooper who was laughing at him. “Don’t worry about it, man. Sometimes life is too exciting for manners.”
He nodded, still with a mouth full of bread and chewed.
“They’re six and ten. Nathan’s birthday is in the fall and he’ll be eleven,” Rebecca said, answering as if nothing had happened. “I bet Nathan would love to play ball with you.”
“You could get one of those hoops that can be lowered, to make it easier for Oliver.”