by LP Lovell
“Because it’s clearly not American, and it’s an American passport.”
“And Verdi is?”
His smirk turns into a full grin. “My family has been here for three generations. I guess you’ve got a better chance. Either way, you aren’t getting out of the country without a passport.”
I roll my eyes. “Fine. Thank you.”
My attention shifts behind him when I see movement in the doorway. Una steps into the kitchen, dressed in a tight blue dress. I almost do a double take. She looks at Nero, and he holds her gaze for a moment, some silent conversation passing between them before he silently collects Dante and leaves the room. That was weird.
“What was that?” I ask with a frown.
“Anna, I need to talk to you.”
I sigh. “Una, I’m not changing my mind. I’m going to New Zealand.”
She shakes her head. “Sasha has been in Russia for the last few days.”
“Okay.”
“He’s found something. I had to wait for him to be one hundred percent sure to tell you…” My mind works at warp speed trying to think what could possibly have my sister looking so on edge. “You…have a child.”
I laugh. “No, I don’t. I think I’d remember that.”
She shakes her head. “Sasha said that the mother is a surrogate, but the egg was yours. Taken at some time while you were at the facility.” My blood runs cold, and again, the possibilities are flying through my mind at a hundred miles an hour.
“That’s not possible,” I whisper.
Una drops her gaze to the floor and fidgets awkwardly. “I don’t know what to tell you, Anna.”
“Nicholai is dead.”
She nods. “Yes, but he’s been replaced, and the Elite breeding program is now in full swing.”
I don’t know what to say. I don’t even know what to think. “I can’t have children.”
“I know,” she whispers.
Turning away from her, I walk out of the kitchen. I need a second to process this. I move over to the huge windows and look out over the city below. Morning light creeps through the tall buildings, bathing half the city in shadows. And that’s how I feel. Like I’m standing right on that cusp between the light and the dark, unsure which way I’m about to fall. I can sense Una lingering behind me, hovering.
Questions start burning away at me as I truly process the reality of this. “Is it a girl or a boy?” I ask without looking at her.
“A little girl.”
I swallow around the lump in my throat as my chest clenches painfully. “How old?” I breathe.
“Just two weeks.”
Squeezing my eyes shut, I imagine her, a tiny baby, in that place, without anyone to show her kindness. I’ve been a captive for half my life, but this is so much worse because she’ll never know freedom. She won’t even know that she’s missing a mother, a father…a life.
“Can Sasha get her out?” I ask tentatively, the faintest trace of hope trying to take hold. Silence. I turn to face my sister and find her gaze fixed on the floor. “Una?”
“You have to understand, you can’t just walk out of that facility with a child.”
“You got Dante out.”
She shakes her head. “That was different. Sasha was trusted then. I was on the inside. And Dante was a one-off child at the time. They didn’t have the security fully in place to guard him.”
“So, you’re saying you can’t save her!” My heartbeat hammers through my veins.
I’m not sure what to feel. Hope? Despair? My life has never been my own, and I’ve never really had the luxury of being able to even think about or consider the fact that I can’t have children. It was never something that was a possibility or consideration, and therefore I never mourned what I would surely never have anyway.
But now I think about it, about my child out there somewhere…all I want is to protect her. It’s a need so fierce, I can think of nothing else.
“That’s not good enough. You can’t just tell me I have a daughter and follow it with the fact that I can’t get to her or save her from that place!”
Una sighs. “I’m working on it, okay? It just takes time. Nero is trying to negotiate through the political stuff.”
“Political stuff?” My temper spikes and my fists clench. “She’s not a business deal, Una!”
She looks at me sadly. “To them, you know she is.”
Shaking my head, I move past her. She goes to follow me, but I hold my hand up. “Stop.”
I make my way upstairs and into my room. With each step I take, I can feel myself sinking further and further into this panic. All the time I’ve spent trying to be strong, but right now I feel so weak and helpless. All this time, I’ve listened to my sister, but where is she now? She can’t help me. Slamming the bedroom door, I rush to the bedside table and pick up my phone, hysteria creeping up on me. My chest feels tight, and my hands tremble as I pick the device up and dial a number.
It rings twice before it cuts off. “Anna.”
“Rafael,” I choke out his name like it’s a prayer, my last hope—because of course, it is. “I need you.”
There’s a beat of silence. “I’m sending a plane for you.”
22
Rafael
I pace the width of the hangar nervously as I watch the plane taxi towards us. Anna sounded like she’s in trouble. She called me. She has her sister. She has Nero. But she called me. Why?
The plane maneuvers into the hangar and comes to a halt. As soon as the steps touch the floor, Anna appears at the top. She descends them and walks to me, her pace quickening with every stride. And then she throws her arms around my neck. I drag her small body up against me and hold her, inhaling the subtle raspberry scent of her. Her shoulders tremble, and I feel the rush of her exhaled breath against my throat.
“Avecita.”
“I’m sorry,” she breathes.
Lowering her to the ground, I cup her face in both hands and wipe the tears from beneath her eyes. “Talk to me. What’s wrong?”
She closes her eyes, and more tears break free. “I have a daughter.”
Everything freezes for a moment, and I swear my heart stops beating. “What?” A fresh wave of tears comes as her face crumples. “Anna, I need you to be clear here.”
“The Russians…they stole one of my eggs…” she chokes.
Turning slightly, I wave at Lucas, and he pulls the car forward the few feet to get to us. Opening the back door, I guide Anna inside. As soon as I get in, she’s shifting closer to me. She’s fragile, unstable.
“So, they bred a child from your egg?” She nods. “That’s fucked up.”
She sniffs. “Una and Nero won’t help to save her.”
“They probably can’t, little warrior.”
She drops her chin to her chest, her shoulders slumping. “I need your help, Rafe.” When she lifts her eyes to mine, she looks so completely lost.
She left. I let her leave. Twice. And yet here she is, asking me for help. And here I am, wanting to give it to her, because despite everything, I love her, and I think I’d give her anything.
“Anna, I don’t know how much I can do.”
She nods solemnly. “I understand.”
Placing a finger under her chin, I force her gaze to mine. “But I’ll try, baby.”
She nods, a sad smile pulling at her lips as wave after wave of uncontrollable tears pours down her face. “I love you,” she whispers.
I press my forehead to hers and sigh. “I wish I could stop loving you, avecita.”
“Please don’t,” she whispers, her hand sliding around the back of my neck.
“Never.”
She presses her lips to mine, and I can feel how fragile she is right now. “I’m sorry I left,” she whispers against my lips. “It wasn’t because I don’t love you.”
“I know, little warrior.” She drops her face to my throat, clinging to me as though I’m the only jutting rock in a stormy sea. “I know.”
<
br /> Placing the cigar to my lips, I take my lighter, flipping the top open. Bright flames dance across the end and the heavy scent of cigar smoke swirls around me, infecting my lungs. I remember when this simple routine was as regular to me as breathing—me smoking a cigar whilst watching Anna sleep. Her chest rises and falls with deep, even breathes. I had to slip something in her brandy earlier to get her to sleep, or she’d still be pacing my office now. Even in the low silvery light cast by the moon, I can see the dark circles lingering beneath her eyes.
I tell myself I can let her go, that I can live without her, but I can’t. I hate watching her turn from something pure and good into something vicious and vengeful, but truthfully, there’s nothing about Anna that I could really turn away from. I just hate the guilt that eats away at me every time I look at her and see her losing just a little more of that innate goodness. It’s my world that’s doing it to her. The simple need to survive in it is forcing her to evolve.
I stand there, quietly smoking my cigar, and when I’m done, I toss it over the edge of the balcony, strip out of my clothes, and slip into the bed beside her. She instantly reaches for me in her sleep, her cheek resting against my chest. Her tiny frame melts against me, and I wrap an arm around her, wishing I could protect her from whatever is to come, but I can’t. What comes next is not a physical threat, but an emotional one.
I stroke her hair behind her ear, watching her sleep. How has this girl managed to disrupt my world so entirely?
23
Anna
I wake up, and for a few seconds, there’s nothing but the feel of the warm sun on my bare skin. A few seconds of bliss before I remember everything. Rolling over, I stretch my arm over the cool sheets. The pillow still smells of Rafael, of citrus and cigar smoke.
Dragging myself out of bed, I make my way downstairs. I step into the kitchen, and for a second, I falter. A woman stands at the stove, making eggs, her long dark hair spilling down her back. I think I expected to see the neat greying bun of Maria, and her absence feels all the more tragic in this particular house.
Samuel is sitting on one side of the table, and Rafael on the other. They both look up at me when I walk in, and I pull my long cardigan around me a little tighter.
“Anna.” Rafael places folds his newspaper and places it down on the kitchen table.
The girl whirls around to face me, her long hair spilling around her shoulders. I’m met with the pretty green eyes of Bella, and I find myself smiling, despite everything.
“Bella.” She smiles shyly and drops her gaze to the ground. “You’re here.” I glance at Rafael, and he pushes to his feet, fastening the button on his jacket in one smooth motion.
He moves closer and brushes his lips over my jaw. “Well, you gave her a phone,” he whispers. “I figured you liked her.”
I pull back, my eyes locking with his. “Thank you,” I breathe.
He cups my cheek and kisses my forehead before moving around me and leaving the room. Samuel stands up, offers me a nod and follows him. I stand there for a second before my brain catches up. I jog after him.
“Rafe!” He pauses in the corridor and waves Samuel ahead of him as I catch him up. He waits for me to speak, but as I open my mouth, I don’t know what to say.
I came to him because I need to get the child, my child, away from the Russians. But now I’m standing here in front of him, and I don’t know where we stand. I don’t know how to ask him for this. “I… I need your help.”
He takes a cigar from the inside pocket of his jacket. “I know.”
“But…I know you’ve already done so much for me. And I left you.”
“Avecita, stop.” I swallow heavily and drop my gaze to the floor. His fingers trail my cheek gently. “There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you.”
I squeeze my eyes shut, leaning into his touch. “I don’t deserve you.”
“You’re wrong. You deserve everything, including your child.” I sniff back tears and press my face to his chest. He makes me feel as though everything will be okay. “I’ve organized a meeting.”
I pull back. “With who?”
“Dimitri Petrov, he’s Nicholai Ivanov’s replacement.”
“I should come with you.”
“No,” he says, his voice stern. “You’re too emotionally involved. They see that, and they’ve got us pinned against the wall.”
“Of course, I’m emotionally involved. They stole my eggs, Rafe!”
“I know, but that doesn’t matter now. She does. Your daughter.”
I inhale a deep breath, realization settling in. I have a daughter. A living, breathing child. “Get her out of there.”
He strokes his thumb over my jaw. “I will,” he promises. And I believe him. Unequivocally. He checks his watch. “I have to go. I’ll be back tomorrow, okay?” I nod, and he turns away.
“Rafe!” He pauses and glances over his shoulder. “Be careful.” He winks at me and walks away. I know he can handle himself, but I hate the idea of him being at risk. For me. Again. I’d happily never set foot in Russia or near any of the bratva ever again, and I don’t want Rafael near them either, yet here we are. I have no better cause, and yet I’m not the one taking it up, he is.
I take a seat at the breakfast table, and Bella instantly places a plate of food in front of me.
“You don’t have to make me food, Bella.”
She smiles. “That’s my job.”
“I know, but…”
“I’m grateful. I know that Rafael is helping me because of you.”
“He needed a new maid. Those guys need a woman to keep an eye on them.”
She tucks her hair behind her ear. “I heard…about Maria.”
I suck in a sharp breath. “Yeah, when I first came here I was a mess. I was alone and convinced that they’d bought me. You know how it is, another man, another master…”
She nods. “I can imagine.”
“Maria was kind to me, even though I didn’t trust her.”
“She sounds nice.”
“She was. Anyway, how have the guys been treating you?”
A small smile touches her lips. “Good. I don’t see Rafael much, but Samuel has been kind to me.”
I lift a brow. “Samuel? Kind?”
Her smile widens. “Yeah. He keeps the men away from me.”
“Okay, well…good.” Maybe it’s just me that Samuel doesn’t like. “What are you doing now?” I ask.
He shrugs. “I was just going to tidy some of the rooms.”
“I’ll help you.” I need the distraction, to be honest. Rafael won’t even reach Russia until tonight, and he’s not meeting Dimitri until tomorrow.
And so, I help Bella. I vacuum carpets while she polishes and dusts, and there’s something strangely soothing in the mundane tasks. When we’re done, I take her out into the gardens.
“Have you been out here?” I ask.
“No.” She pads along behind me, her sandals brushing over the emerald green grass.
“It’s prettier at night.”
“How can it be prettier when you can’t see it?”
I smile and glance over my shoulder. “The stars.”
She says nothing more as she follows me through the gardens to the pond. I take a seat on the low wall that surrounds the water, and she joins me, glancing out over the tranquility.
“It’s beautiful.”
I nod. “When I first came here, I wouldn’t leave my room. I thought their promises of freedom were a trick.” I smile. “So, Rafael ordered me to leave my room. I would come out here every night when it was quiet.” I look at her, and she drops her gaze.
“You were in the Sinaloa too?”
“For six years, yes.”
“You were taken?”
“No, I was sold to them. From another owner.”
Her eyes flick over me. “But…you’re so young.”
“I was first sold when I was thirteen.”
Her face pales, and she swallows heavily.
“I’m sorry.”
“You were taken?”
“Yes, from a nightclub in my hometown in Chile.”
“We all have our stories. None of them pretty.”
She nods towards the gun strapped to my thigh. “Yours is very different now.”
I follow her gaze to the weapon that Rafael gave me. “It is, and yours will be too.”
“I hope so,” she says, trailing her fingers through the water. “What will happen to the other women?”
“They’ll be looked after,” I promise. “Rafael would never let anything happen to them.”
“Because of you.” Her eyes lock with mine. “He saves them for you. He told me.”
“No. He’s a good man. He would do it anyway.”
She shakes her head. “Well, thank you, anyway.”
“Don’t you want to go home, Bella?”
She inhales a deep breath, her shoulders rising and falling with the action. “I do, but they’ll never understand.”
“I get it.” Una would understand to a degree, but not truly. What would it be like to go home to a normal family? I can barely recall a time when I ever had one, so I wouldn’t know, but I can see why that might be daunting. To live your old life, when you’ve been so fundamentally changed. Once you’ve lived in the darkness, the light can be disorientating.
“It’s just so hard to see a future.”
“One day you’ll wake up and realize that you aren’t that scared girl anymore.”
“I hope so.”
24
Rafael
I step out of the car and glance at the glass skyscraper protruding high into the gray Moscow skyline like a blade. Samuel comes to a halt beside me and clears his throat.
“Are you sure about this?” he asks for the third time since we left the hotel.
“Sam, stop.”
On a sigh, he walks ahead of me, his entire body rigid. I know he doesn’t like this, but deep down, I know he really understands. I walk up to the front of the building and step inside. The lobby is covered in marble and brushed steel. Two pretty receptionists sit behind a desk, their eyes tracking my movement as I come close.