Clint threw a couple of bills on the table to cover their lunch before a fan approached, asking for an autograph. They’d been interrupted a couple of times, but Natasha and Austin didn’t seem to mind sharing him with his fans.
Once they were alone again, Natasha said, “I think you really made an impact on him, Clint.”
“I hope so. I may not have a lot of experience with kids, aside from my nephew, but I have had a lot of life experience, and I’d like to share that with Austin, if you don’t mind.” He was cautious about overstepping, especially since it had been just the two of them for so long.
“I don’t mind at all.” She tucked a lock of hair behind her ear before her eyes drifted to the hallway near the restrooms. “I try to guide him, but sometimes I know he feels like I’m trying to control him. I don’t want him to rebel one day because I’ve held on too tight, but I don’t want to give him too much freedom and allow him to make bad choices.” She sighed. “We’re at a pivotal point right now. He’s not a little boy anymore, and I have to stop treating him like one, but it’s hard. I still look at him and see my baby.”
“Maybe you need another baby,” Clint said, testing Natasha’s reaction. “Could be that would make it a little easier for you to let go of Austin when the time comes.”
She laughed. “I don’t think it works that way. You can’t replace one kid with another.”
He studied her carefully, trying to decide whether he saw fear or simply caution lurking in her pretty blue eyes. “I know you can’t, but it’s obvious you’re a great mother with a lot of love to give. Why not have another baby?”
“I’m open to the idea if things line up just right.”
Clint assumed she was referring to marriage. “I’m glad to hear that.” He couldn’t help but wonder how Austin would feel about being a big brother, though it was too soon to ask him. “You think Austin would be okay with you getting married and expanding your family?”
With a crooked smile, she said, “That depends. If I were to marry you, I think he’d definitely be okay with it. As for having a sibling… I think he’d be happy about that too. When he was younger, he always asked why he couldn’t have a brother or sister like his friends.” She laughed. “I think he just wanted someone to boss around.”
“He’s a really great kid, and I think he’d be an awesome big brother.”
Natasha smiled when she spotted her son returning to the table. “Thanks. I think so too.”
Chapter Twelve
Austin was sitting on his bed, strumming his guitar and reviewing the sheet music Clint had brought, when he said, “Can I ask you a question?”
“Sure, anything, buddy.” Clint linked his hands behind his head and leaned back in the swivel chair at Austin’s small corner desk.
“Do you love my mom?” Austin blushed, dipping his head when Clint studied him. “You don’t have to answer if you think it’s none of my business, but I can tell she really likes you, and I don’t want her to get hurt if things don’t work out between you guys.”
It wasn’t the first time Clint had been impressed by Austin’s maturity, but he wasn’t surprised. The kid had taken on the role of “man of the house” long before he should have. It was only natural that he be protective of his mama. “I do love your mom. We’ve been friends a long time.”
Austin frowned as though that wasn’t the answer he’d been hoping for. “I’m not asking if you love her as a friend.”
“I know that, but you have to love someone as a friend before you can develop long-lasting romantic feelings for them. Or at least you should. The best relationships are built on a foundation of friendship.”
“Do you think you and my mom will last?”
“I do,” Clint said, nodding.
“Does that mean you want to marry her?”
“I hope to someday. Would you be okay with that?”
Austin’s eyes lit up as he set his guitar on the bed. “Does that mean we’d get to move to your ranch and I’d have a chauffeur take me to school and everything?”
Clint could understand how glamourous his life must look to a kid like Austin, but he wanted to respect Natasha's wishes for her son to remain grounded. “I assume we’d live at the ranch, unless your mother would rather live in the city. But no, I don’t think you’d have a chauffeur take you to school.”
Austin’s shoulders slumped momentarily. “Still, it’d be really cool to live in a big house and have my friends over whenever I wanted.”
Clint knew their apartment wasn’t really big enough for entertaining, so he could see why Austin would be excited about having somewhere to entertain his friends, but he knew he was being given an opportunity to set Austin straight about a few things before the kid got carried away. “I know life hasn’t always been easy for you, but you need to remember that you’ve had it better than a lot of kids. You have a mother who loves you and would do anything for you. Some kids don’t have anyone who cares about them.”
“I know,” Austin said, hanging his head. “Still, it would be kind of nice to have a dad. I’d like for Mom to have someone who loves her.” He shrugged. “I’m not gonna be around forever. I know she doesn’t want to think about that, but it’s true.”
“You’re right,” Clint said, resting his ankle on his knee. “And I’d really like to be the guy who’s there for your mama, but…”
“But what?” Austin asked.
He didn’t want to offend Austin or make him feel as though he didn’t understand where Austin was coming from, because he did. So Clint decided to take the man-to-man approach, hoping Austin would appreciate it. “I’ll be honest with you. Your mama’s concerned about what this lifestyle change could mean for you.”
“What do you mean?”
“She loves how humble you are, that you don’t take things for granted or depend on material things to make you happy.” A chagrined look crossed Austin’s face, and Clint figured he was thinking about the conversation they’d had after their first guitar lesson. “She’s worried that you might change if you get a taste of my life.”
Austin bit his lip before looking at Clint. “It’d be cool to have nice things, but it’s more important to me that my mom’s happy with someone like you, someone who loves her and gets how great she is.”
Clint smiled. “I do get how great she is. I’ve never cared about anyone the way I care about her, and I promise you that if I get the chance, I’ll spend the rest of my life reminding her how special I think she is.”
“I know you will.” He swallowed, looking a little uneasy. “I can tell by the way you look at her that you don’t want anyone else.”
Clint was struck by the depth of their conversation, but he was glad Austin felt he could be honest with him. “No, I don’t want anyone else. But for your mama to be truly happy with me, she needs to know that you’re happy too.”
Austin licked his lips as he stared at the floor. “I would be happy if you married my mom, and not just because I’d get to live in a big house. You’re a good guy, Clint. I’d like to have you as a stepfather.”
Clint wasn’t often at a loss for words, but something about the kid’s quiet sentiment touched him deeply. “I’d like that too. A lot.”
Austin looked at him. “My real dad didn’t want to know me.”
“Then that was his loss.” Clint looked Austin directly in the eye, hoping he could tell Clint meant every word. “You’re an amazing young man. I feel privileged to know you.”
“Thanks.” Austin fell silent for a few seconds before he sighed. “You’d never bail on your own kid. Why’d I have to get stuck with a dad who didn’t give a shi—” He smirked, obviously thinking of his mom’s warnings about his language. “Who didn’t care?”
“I know how it feels to be bitter and resentful toward your parents. I don’t have the best relationship with my old man.” Clint felt small and petty when he thought of all the missed opportunities to repair his relationship with his father, to be the b
igger man and let bygones be bygones.
“Yeah, but at least you know who he is. I don’t even know what my dad looks like.”
“Maybe it’s better that way,” Clint said gently. “I’m a firm believer that everything happens for a reason. Maybe your biological father wasn’t meant to be a part of your life. Maybe he was just meant to help bring you into the world ‘cause your mama needed you.”
“My mom’s pretty strong. I don’t know that she needed me.” Austin rushed to explain. “I mean, I know she loves me and doesn’t regret having me, but if I hadn’t been born, she would have been able to get an education back then instead of waiting until now to do it.”
“Kid, with age comes wisdom,” Clint said, leaning forward to grip Austin’s shoulder. “There are so many classes I took when I was in college that I wish I could take over now with the knowledge and life experience I have today.”
“Like what?” Austin scooted back to lean against the wall that butted up against his bed.
“World history, philosophy, stuff like that.” Clint shrugged. “I took those courses mainly because they fit into my schedule and I needed the credit. I didn’t show up as often as I should have, physically or mentally. Your mom values getting an education. She knows how important it is, how much it means to her and how much she’s willing to sacrifice to realize her dreams. Not all young people understand that in their early twenties. I know I didn’t.” Clint hadn’t thought about the mistakes of his youth in a long time. He tried not to dwell on the past, but if he could help Austin understand something from a different perspective, it was worth it to him to wade through painful memories. He wanted to have a positive impact on Natasha’s life and on her son’s life too. Especially if Austin was going to be his stepson.
“So you think it’s a good thing that my mom waited so long to get her degree?”
“Only she can answer that. But in my opinion, it’s not a bad thing.” Clint smiled. “I can tell you one thing for sure. Having you when she did made your mother a better, stronger, more confident woman. Sure, she had to face some challenges, but she also got to have some amazing experiences thanks to you. I know she wouldn’t trade that for anything.” Clint knew he didn’t have to go out of his way to make Austin feel loved. Natasha did a great job of that, but he saw their conversation as an opportunity to let Austin know that he would always come first with Natasha, and Clint was okay with that.
“You think if you and my mom do get married, you’ll have kids?”
Clint was skating on thin ice now. That was a question he should defer to Natasha, but he’d been upfront with Austin and didn’t want to shut him down now. “I’d really like to have kids. I love my nephew, and getting to know you only reinforces my belief that kids could add a lot to my life, but even if that never happens and your mama and I do get married, I’d feel blessed to be your stepfather, Austin.”
“Thanks.” Austin smiled. “For what it’s worth, I think it’d be pretty cool to be a big brother.”
Clint grinned, feeling the weight of the world slide off his shoulders as he realized how much he needed Austin’s blessing. “Your opinion is worth a lot to me.”
They exchanged a look, and Clint knew he was well on his way to falling in love with this kid. Austin’s half-smile told Clint he felt the same way.
“Excuse me,” Natasha said, tapping on the door before peeking her head in. “I don’t mean to interrupt.” She looked at her son. “Your nana just called and said Brant’s visiting his grandmother. She wondered whether you’d like to come up and hang out for a bit.”
“Sure,” Austin said, sliding off the bed.
“Hold on.” Natasha raised her hand and looked at Clint. “He’s finished his lesson?”
“Yes, ma’am,” Clint said, winking at Austin. “He did a great job. He’s obviously been working on the chords I taught him last time, and I gave him a couple of new songs to work on today. I expect to see even more progress by our next lesson.”
“Great.” She tugged on the hood of the sweatshirt Austin had slipped on. “But what about that science project? What more do you have to do?”
“I’ve laid everything out,” Austin said. “I just have to finish up and do a dry run to make sure I know the material.”
“Okay.” Natasha checked her watch. “I’d like you back here no later than five. That should give you an hour before dinner and a few hours after to make sure you’re prepared.”
Clint stood and was surprised when Austin grabbed his hand and pulled him into a half hug. “Thanks for everything, man. You’re the best.”
“Right back ‘atcha,” Clint said, glancing at Natasha over her son’s head. “Have fun with your buddy and good luck with that science project. Gimme a call and let me know how it goes, okay?”
“I will.” Austin gave his mom a quick kiss on the cheek as he snuck past her.
When they heard the front door slam, Natasha said, “I was just about to make some coffee. Can you stay for a cup?”
Clint crossed the few steps between them and pulled her into his arms. “I’ll take advantage of any opportunity I have to spend time with you. I thought you knew that by now.” He kissed her, losing himself in her delicate scent and the feel of her hands skating up his bare back beneath his thin cotton shirt.
She glanced at her bedroom across the hall when they broke apart. “We have a couple of hours. We could make the most of it.”
Clint loved that she was so anxious to make love to him, but for the first time in his life, he was building a relationship on a rock-solid foundation that had nothing to do with sex. He didn’t feel the need to rush things. “I don’t want to risk Austin coming back when we’re—”
Natasha laughed. “Honey, the first rule of being a parent is to steal moments whenever you can.”
“Speaking of which,” Clint said, running his hands through Natasha’s hair as he tipped her head back. He wanted to tell Natasha about the conversation he’d had with Austin in case her son blindsided her later, bombarding her with questions about weddings and babies. “Austin and I had a nice talk about the possibility of me being his stepfather someday.”
Natasha tipped her head to the side, studying Clint. ”Go on. I’m listening.”
“He asked me if I loved you.”
“What did you tell him?” she asked, blushing slightly.
“I told him that I did.” Clint stole a quick kiss. “Then he asked me if I wanted to marry you, and I told him I did.”
“Wow,” Natasha said, half-laughing. “I can’t believe he was so…”
“He had every right to ask me those questions.” Clint wanted to make sure Natasha knew he admired Austin for looking out for her. “He loves you and wants to protect you. You’ve got a great kid there.”
“I know.” Natasha pursed her lips, appearing on the verge of tears. “Sometimes I wonder how I got so lucky.”
Clint held her tight. “You two deserve each other.” He kissed the top of her head. “But I sure would love to be a part of it. When I told Austin that, he seemed really excited about the prospect of having me as a stepfather. And I can’t tell you—”
Natasha pulled back. “Uh, I love that you guys can have these conversations.” She ran a hand through her tousled hair. “But I don’t want us to get ahead of ourselves. You and Austin are still getting to know each other, and you and I are just figuring out how this is going to work. I don’t want us to rush the whole family thing.”
Clint knew Natasha had to move at her own pace and he had no right to expect more than she felt comfortable with, but marrying her tomorrow wouldn’t be soon enough for him. He wished she felt the same way.
“You’re right.” He gripped her hands. “But I think we made good progress today, don’t you? I mean, I feel closer to both you and Austin. It feels like the three of us together really click. Am I crazy?” When she didn’t respond, he chuckled, trying to ignore the tightening in his chest. “Am I imagining things?”
; “No.” Natasha reached up on her toes to kiss him. “Today was definitely another step forward.”
***
Natasha was sitting at her desk at work the following morning when her sister called.
“I was wondering what I should get Austin for his birthday,” Terri said. “Any ideas?”
“Not really,” Natasha said, reaching for the framed photo of her son on her desk. Every time she thought about his birthday, she felt a wave of mixed emotions. She was so proud of the young man he was becoming, yet his birthday reminded her that he wasn’t her little boy anymore. “You know he’ll be happy with anything you get him, Ter.”
“Mama tells me there’s a new man in your life.”
She should have known her sister had an ulterior motive for calling. She was probably on her free period at school, and Natasha knew she wouldn’t waste those precious minutes on a phone call without a good reason. “I don’t know that I’d call him the ‘new’ man in my life. We’ve been friends for a long time.” She’d never told her sister about Clint because she knew Terri thought celebrities were superficial and fixated on material things.
“So how come you’ve never mentioned him?”
“I have several friends I’ve never talked to you about.” Mainly because her social circle didn’t extend beyond work and school. “It’s no big deal.”
“I hear your new boyfriend’s hosting Austin’s birthday party at his place. I’d say that’s a pretty big deal.”
Natasha didn’t feel comfortable talking to her sister about Clint. He was an incredible man, but her sister could be judgmental and critical. Natasha didn’t want to hear Terri’s warnings about Clint’s immoral lifestyle as a musician.
“Not really,” Natasha said, setting the photo back on her desk with a sigh. “You know how tiny my apartment is. Not ideal for hosting a bunch of rowdy boys, and I can’t really afford to take them out. With school, I’m pretty tapped out.” Natasha hoped the mention of school would welcome a shift in the direction of the conversation.
Hero Worship (Music City Moguls Book 6) Page 12