“I think it’s time you leave.” My dad’s voice is even but the warning in it scares even me a little.
“We need to know our granddaughter, we have nothing left.”
“Come on Sylvia, let’s go. Jodi will get in touch when she is ready. We aren’t making anything any better here. Come on dear.” Fred places his hand on Sylvia’s shoulder and leads her from the room. “Here is our number if you can find it in your heart to let us in.”
“This isn’t over, I need to be part of that babies life, you took my son; you won’t deny me this.”
Cory grabs me tightly and almost smothers me with his chest. His chest rises and falls in rapid fire. The tension rolls from his body.
“It’s ok baby, let’s take our princess home. I just want to go home.”
My mam carries the car seat as Cory keeps me in his arms as he moves us towards the exit.
Cory
The drive home is silent; my body thrums with the rage I feel inside. Tears slide from Jodi’s eyes. silently descending her beautifully pained face. Today should be the most amazing day bringing our little one home but instead it’s been turned upside down by that vile humans parents.
“Baby we are home.” I say reaching over and touching her leg she jolts away from me. The fear is written all over her face, the fear of me touching her scares the crap out of me. She jumps from the car and opens the rear doors to grab the car seat just as her parents pull into the drive behind us.
“What is happening?” Diane asks as she walks towards my stunned body.
“She is shutting down. We have to help her.” I say while walking towards the front door which is just about to slam shut. “Wait baby, we need in also.”
“Hurry then.” Is all she says and we rush through closing it behind us. Without even waiting for us to move further in to the house she squeezes past us and locks the door before peeking through the spyhole. Shit.
“Baby, no one is out there.” Cal says as she’s pushing away from the door and into the living room unbuckling Cleo from her car seat and pulling her into her arms and sniffing her head.
“I’ll make some tea.” Diane says, visibly shaking from head to toe.
“Sit down a minute Diane; we need to talk, all of us.” I say as I wonder over to the sofa my girls are sitting in. Cal grabs Diane’s hand and pulls her to the sofa opposite ours. “I know you’re scared baby, but no one will ever hurt you again. There will be no one outside and if you ever feel like there is, I’m here; you have to talk to me. I know them turning up has thrown you through a loop and knocked you back but you have to remember that you have all of us and we will do everything in our power to protect you.”
“They are going to take my baby.”
“No they won’t, they have no right to her in any way shape or form.”
“I’m going to have to see them, let them see her she will know about him.”
“Baby, no one is going to force you to let them take her or see her for that matter. It won’t be a problem. And she will only know about him if and when you feel you need to tell her.”
“What if they come here and take her? What if they kidnap her? What if…”
“No what ifs, they won’t. I will talk to them if need be. I’ll get Serg on the case if needs be. No one will ever take her. I swear on my life baby, it’s never going to happen.”
“We need to register her birth and put you down as her father. Are you still ok with that?”
“Yes of course.”
“Will you tell them to back off? Will you be here in case they come?” Her pitch rises again.
“They aren’t getting in here ever. I’ll tell them but you did an amazing job back at the hospital baby. Fred will make sure that if anything at all happens it will be on your terms and no one else’s. Can you give Cleo to your mam? I need you to come with me for one minute.”
She pulls Cleo up to her face, kissing her softly on the forehead breathing in that amazing baby scent before standing and handing her to her mam and dad who both look at me like I’ve unlocked something no one else could. When Jodi turns back to me, I see they are right. Her whole demeanour has changed, her eyes are brighter the stress lines are gone from her forehead. She still looks like someone who just got out of hospital but her colour has returned and she slightly smiles at me before taking my hand.
We walk towards the door and she turns her head slightly towards me nodding, knowing what I’m going to ask her to do without having to say it. Her hand trembles as she reaches with her free hand for the key, turning it slowly to release the lock she then moves it to the handle and pulls the door open. I allow her to walk out first knowing this is what she needs to do but knowing she wouldn’t have done it without holding onto me. We walk towards the grass outlining our front garden and ice cold rain drops hit us straight in the face.
“You ok baby?”
She lets go of my hand and spins around checking out our surroundings. When she spins back around in my direction, the smile that lights her face is amazing.
“I’m good. Thank you, I swear I thought I was ok I’m so sorry.”
“Never be sorry, you did nothing wrong and even if you had I’d be there to make sure whatever it was went away. I don’t want you to fear the world or anyone in it. You are the most amazing woman I know and I know that you can come back from anything. You are my beautiful girl and together we will raise Cleo to be just as strong as her mama.” The rain hammers my face hard, distracting me a little.
“Will you dance with me?” I look at her in horror.
“I can’t freaking dance and its pissing it down. Hell, we are fucking drowned rats here.”
“I don’t mind a little rain; I think it’s cleansing me.” Her face lights up and I drag her body towards mine moving us to the sound of the rain hammering the pavement. When I glance at our front door both her parents are standing there watching our exchange with tears streaming down their faces as fast as the rain hits the pavement.
“Baby, we are scaring your parents and shit I don’t want you catching flu. You think we can finish this inside?” I swing her around so she can see her parents with the baby in the doorway. When she busts out laughing I pull away and turn to look also. “Fucking hell, did they teach you to dance at Cleo’s age?”
“Probably my mum and dad are big on dancing around the house.”
“Good job I love you all otherwise I’d think you were all crazy.”
“Oh you’re just as crazy, who dances in the rain just because their girlfriend asks them to.” She moves away from me slightly before turning back and grabbing my hand. “Come on I want to shower and get in my pjs before they leave us.”
“You will be lucky; I’ve promised them the spare room for at least two weeks so they are here if you need to sleep or I need to work.”
“I don’t need a sitter.” Her words might sound mean but her face tells me she is happy.
“Fucking hell, don’t tell them that. I swear if we needed one they would move in and never leave.” I feign mock terror and she elbows me in the ribs. We run into the house and I shake myself like a dog soaking her a little more.
“You both better get up there and get showered and changed before you catch your death. Flaming idiots.” Diane says pointing towards the stairs.
“You ok to watch her for ten minutes?” Jodi asks.
“Yes now go. I swear if it wasn’t so beautiful I’d be knocking your heads together for your stupidity.”
“She would you know!” Jodi laughs at me before peeling away and sprinting up the stairs. I swear something inside her has flipped and she’s whole again.
9 Months later
Jodi
“Stop with the damn shaking already you’re gonna smudge your nails before they set.” The nail stylist says.
“Never mind her nails her lashes are gonna be halfway up her eyelids.” Emily states.
“Why are you so nervous?”
“I’m marrying my best friend but
I’m so scared. Everyone will be looking at me, judging me.”
“No-one is judging you, stupid head. Everyone here is desperate to see you marry that man and to be happy.”
“We are happy; nothing makes me happier than that man and our baby girl.”
“We know.” Emily laughs before her face turns serious. “What made you invite them? I mean I applaud you because I fucking wouldn’t but shit what made you think ‘oh I know I’ll invite some dickheads parents to my wedding’.”
“Emily I fucking love you. I swear I didn’t want to but after they interrupted my life in the hospital I didn’t want them just showing up here and causing a scene.” I drag in a deep breath before continuing, “I mean, they are both super sweet now they know everything and have had some counselling thanks to the army. They are still getting help but they are amazing with Cleo and they know not to talk about him. Cory and I won’t hide anything from Cleo but we don’t want him thrust into her face until we decide she is ready.”
“Aunty Emily will make sure she never has to put up with anyone’s shit don’t worry.” She says with a smile.” Forever the ultimate godmother.
“Why do you think we picked you? Cleo will never have to go through anything without knowledge and true love.” Emily’s eyes fill with tears and when she starts to rub them I laugh at her.
“Feel better bitch?”
“Always.” I tug her to me hugging her hard. “We need something fruity to do a toast.”
“For god sake Jodi you will never make a lady, its Champagne that you use to toast.”
“Forever the northerner. Fruity please.” When she fills my glass with orange and lemonade and hers with some nasty ass bubbles I continue. “I couldn’t have ever wished I’d have not only found my future but my best girly friend when Cory asked me to come to group, but that is what I got. Emily, my best crazy friend, for you I will always find a smile.”
Her eyes fill with tears as the nail stylist drains her glass and grabs more. Her job is done and as long as she is having fun I’m happy.
“Donna, don’t think your leaving. You’re here all day and night.” She nods knowingly.
Chapter 36
Cory
“You ready for this?” Cal asks.
“I was ready for this the first time I laid eyes on my beautiful woman.”
“Erm son, that’s my daughter.”
“I know, but I’m not sorry.”
“You don’t have to be; I was the same about her mother.” He walks away after this, leaving me alone to prepare myself for my long awaited marriage.
Shit, in the last two years my whole world tilted right and I’ve not only gained the most amazing love ever but the most perfect baby who calls me dada. Shit we all cried our eyes out that day when her first real words fell from her lips like they were magic. A whole new real family, Cal and Diane, my mam and dad and now Fred and Sylvia, which is new but they are so much more aware of the real goings on that they now understand Jodi’s and my worry in the beginning thanks to the army officers involved in Lance’s downfall. It took weeks of talking about it slowly and I’m thankful it happened as we now have three sets of grandparents who want to spend time with my princess and would happily argue whose weekend it is. I’m pulled from my loneliness when the door opens.
“You ok Terry?”
“Yep, just checking on you son.” He smiles at me all suited and booted himself. “Had to, she messaged and demanded I made sure her bestfriend was ok. I swear that woman will be the end of me.”
“I know that feeling I’ve felt it for a good eleven years shit maybe longer.”
“Hey, neither of us would change it, right?”
“No way. I got more out of this life than most would. How is my best friend? I swear I barely see her.”
“She’s as amazing as ever. We are seeing a fertility expert right now, don’t mention it to anyone but we had a sly marriage last month and I’ve eventually got her moved in.”
“What?”
“Yeah sorry, she knew you wouldn’t be happy but I’m no good at lying and I’ve been dying to tell you.”
“Okay then, go get her I want words right now.” He looks like he about to be sick but leaves the room. I stand in shock taking it in and hurting at the same time.
Jodi
The bang on the door jolts us all and I almost spill my drink down my newly fitted dress. “Shit” I hiss as Emily grabs the door.
“I’m sorry baby, he wants you.”
“For fucking hell sake Tez; you could have waited a few more fucking hours.” She shakes her head as she looks at me then leaves the room, the door still wide open.
“What the fuck is going on Terry?” I ask, obviously the anger in my voice scares the shit out of him.
“We got married.” He blurts then turns his head like he’s ashamed.
I burst out laughing and he turns to me and gapes. “You’re not angry?”
“Angry? Why would I be angry?”
“Your hubby to be is.”
“No he isn’t; he loves Emily probably more than he would love anyone but me and Cleo and she didn’t tell us, but you are both fucked right now, you know that don’t you?”
“What is that supposed to mean?”
“Wait and see sweetie.” Is all I reply as a little giggle leaves me.
Cory
“The master requested my presence.” Oh she is so damn fucking funny.
“Master, oh yeah right, asshole.” I say a little hurt she wouldn’t tell me something like this. “How could you deprive us of being there to watch you marry someone you love, who loves you enough back.” The tears gather at my eyes and I curse beneath my breath.
“We just wanted to be together, no audience.”
“Shit excuse, there needs to be four people involved in a wedding two to marry two to witness. Who witnessed?”
I can see her shaking, reluctant to answer.
“Who witnessed?”
“Randoms off the street.” She’s lying, I hate lying.
“Thank you so fucking much.”
“Cory, we didn’t do it to be nasty we did it for us.”
“Ok, so who witnessed?”
It takes her a few seconds this time. “Random’s.”
“Now the truth or you can leave and I’ll tell her exactly why you aren’t here.”
“Cal and Diane ok, for fuck sake it wasn’t planned. He asked when we met for lunch. He had had our bands read prior so it wasn’t some evil plan to hide it from you but I won’t do this shit. I’m done Cory, I love you but if you are going to knock me back for everything then I can’t be your friend.”
“Emily, stop. You are my most favourite person after my girls. If you can’t tell me you are getting married or invite me then something is seriously wrong.”
“I didn’t want a big fucking scene.” She swings her hand around herself. “This isn’t something a big wedding needs to be part of.”
“You don’t fucking see how fucking amazing you are. Beauty is fucking skin deep. You know that as well as I do. Don’t ever pass yourself off as less than we know you are because we will pull you up for that shit straightaway. I suggest you change your dress.” I leave my words hanging as I dial my mum. “Come sort Emily out please.”
“Wait, what the fuck?” She stammers.
My mum shows up within minutes.
“Just sort her out please and don’t take her back to Jodi.”
“Of course baby.” I don’t dwell on the fact they weren’t there for me for years after she helped save my beautiful Jodi. My parents are special to me and everything else forgotten. Jodi taught me this.
“Cory, please don’t shut me out of your wedding.”
“My mum will sort everything.”
When they leave, I feel a millions times guiltier then I did preparing this.
“It’s almost time Mr Jenson.” The wedding planner shouts through the door. I walk out and travel the floor alone’ descending the sta
ircase where I know we will have some photos done later I’m met with the flashing of a camera.
“No photos before I’m with my beautiful bride please.” The photographer nods and stills. Thank fuck.
I enter the hall and turn to wait on my bride. Sam, the brother of the young soldier Will who took his life, stands before me and his smile is both amazing yet heart wrenching.
“Thank you for allowing me to be here and as your best man. I mean I don’t get it but fuck I’d never say no.”
“The point isn’t to get it. PTSD isn’t one thing it’s a million soul destroying moments. I needed you to be here for me but not only me, for your brother, for everyone who needs a journeys end. I needed to not define death but define a future that yes, seems impossible when you are in the midst of totally destruction to become something that meant there may be something else. I want you to represent your brother as my best man, someone who shares my sorrows because I know you do but I also want you to take it further. I want you to join my team and be a peer. Someone who can talk to the families and let them know the signs. More people to help break the never ending cycle.”
“I’d love to help in whatever way I can. But seriously man, do you think that this is the best time to make this your mission?”
“Nope, but every waking moment since the beginning of this has been my goal. So whether you said yes or no I had to ask, I have to be part of this. I have to help find something no matter how little the outcome. This and my family are above everything else. Jodi has the same faith, she knows how amazing this will be if we get enough people behind it.”
Her Delayed War Page 15