by E. A. Copen
“And you’re only in this pack because you knocked up his daughter,” Sal spat back, dodging around me to give Valentino a shove.
“What’d you say to me?” I let Sal go to put both hands on Valentino, holding him back. “Let me go, gringa. I’m ‘bout to rearrange your boyfriend’s pretty face.”
“That’s the full moon talking,” I huffed back, the effort of holding him and speaking at the same time taking my breath away. “Tomorrow, you two will be brothers again. This’ll blow over just like it always does.”
“Full moon my ass,” Valentino continued. “You don’t know shit, gringa. You know this pendejo don’t want your boy in the pack. He voted against it just last week.”
“That’s not the issue at hand,” I said. “You two need to separate. Go back inside!”
“Yeah, fuck off, Valentino. Go crawl back into your bottle.”
Valentino threw my hands off of his shoulders. “I was trying to be reasonable,” Valentino said, his voice deepening. He spat on the ground between them. “Someone’s got to think. We let our emotions get the best of us with Elias. I ain’t going to let it happen again.”
Valentino stormed back into the house, slamming the door shut behind him.
I turned to Sal. “What the hell was that? Is that true? You voted against Hunter joining?”
Sal took a step back, leaning on the railing. “He’s not ready, Judah. Valentino’s right. We jumped the gun with Elias. Kid’s got to get his hot head under control.”
“He’s twelve years old! According to your file, you were pretty hot headed then, too. You killed two people.”
“To save one.”
“Two wrongs don’t make a right!”
I put my hands in my hair, on the verge of completely losing it. If Hunter didn’t make it with the pack, then what? Who else was going to help me? I didn’t know the first thing about raising werewolves. I couldn’t help him shift. I couldn’t help him find his way in life. And werewolves without a pack, Sal told me they went crazy sometimes. I couldn’t let it happen, not to Hunter, not to my little boy.
“I can’t do this,” I said and started to walk away. Sal’s fingers closed around my arm and didn’t let go. I tried to jerk free but all I managed to do was get him to tighten his grip. “Let me go!”
“No. I’m not letting you go pissed off, not tonight. Hunter needs this.”
“What’s the point,” I shouted, jerking harder, “if you’re just going to vote him down again?”
“Would you quit and just listen to me? Dammit, you stubborn woman!” He let me go and I stumbled back a few steps but somehow managed to keep myself from going down entirely. The effort of fighting against his grip left me breathless. Sal put his hands in his pockets. “I didn’t say no. I said not yet. There’s a difference. I want to get him through his first shift before I change my vote. As his sponsor, I’ve got a responsibility to him to make sure he’s not a danger to himself or others. As Chanter’s second, I’ve got to make sure the pack’s not going to lose their shit over it, too. It takes time.”
I sank down to the sidewalk, not caring the step was just two feet away. Behind the shed, the sun was a brilliant shade of orange as it went down. I stared at the horizon, watching the shadows. “When?”
“I don’t think tonight is a good time. Chanter’s tired. I’m about tapped. He’s going to be pissed from the detention.”
“Take the boy tonight, Saloso,” came Chanter’s voice from behind the screen door. He pushed the door open. I could see he was leaning pretty heavily on a cane but, otherwise, he looked mostly recovered. “Being tired doesn’t release us from our responsibility and, since you think the boy’s temper is so much of a problem, let’s push him to take out his aggression in a healthy way. Perhaps he isn’t ready to shift yet, but the boy needs some one-on-one time with a mentor. The two of you can work out some things, clear his head. I want him to give it a try in the next few months.”
“But Chanter—”
Chanter lifted his cane and slammed it hard against the pavement with a crack as loud as gunfire. Both Sal and I jumped. “Last time I checked, boy, I was still the alpha of this pack. Not you, not Valentino.” He took up his cane and slammed it again, accenting his speech with something in whatever native language the two of them often conversed in.
Sal immediately tucked his head, somehow managing to shrink his six-and-a-half-foot frame down below Chanter’s frail five-foot-nine height. He made a meek reply to Chanter’s speech, his face flushed red.
Seemingly satisfied, Chanter gave a grunt, and then the harsh tone in his voice lessened. “Now, go and get ready. This is going to be a busy night. Both you and I have much to prepare.”
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
Shauna arrived in the powder blue Prius she shared with Daphne. After Sal and Valentino, she was the biggest werewolf in the pack. She ran a gym in Eden, which gave her plenty of time to lift weights on her own. She didn’t care one way or the other about me and so, when I gave her a standard greeting, she nodded back. Having no real reason to talk to me, she went on inside.
Ed and Hunter pulled up on the moped a few minutes later. Hunter wore a black t-shirt and ripped up blue jeans. His shaggy brown hair came down below what the helmet would cover. Once he took the helmet off and brushed his hands through his hair, I lamented the fact I had let him color it again. He’d gone for black, which was the prevailing color in all his wardrobe now. I should be thankful he hasn’t asked for black eyeliner, I thought and went to meet him.
“Hey, Hunter,” I said. “How was detention?”
He shrugged. “Could have been worse, I guess.”
“Is this going to be the last one?”
“Probably not.”
I crossed my arms.
“What?” he continued. “You asked.”
Ed gave Hunter a pat on the back and said, “You want a soda?”
Hunter was about to say he did when the screen door behind me opened and Chanter came out, drawing Ed’s full attention. Chanter didn’t speak. He just leaned on his cane and gave a slight motion toward the door with his chin. Ed understood and went up the stairs and into the house without another word. Hunter gave me a questioning look and slid his hands into his back pockets when I took a step back.
“Do you remember when we first met?” Chanter asked of Hunter. “I asked you how you felt. You said you were mad and you had no idea who to direct your anger at or how. Do you remember?”
“Yeah, I guess.”
“Hunter,” I hissed in a whisper.
“I guess I remember, sir,” Hunter corrected. “Why?”
“When you get into these fights at school, do you feel the same?” Hunter fidgeted with his fingers, his eyes drifting to me. “I asked you, boy, not your mother. She can’t answer for you.”
“Those kids are assholes. They piss me off.”
Chanter eased himself down to stand on the first step. “That’s not what I asked you. I asked you what you feel when you strike your peers.”
“I don’t know,” Hunter mumbled, turning his head to the side. “I don’t even care. Why should I if no one else does?”
Chanter sighed, his whole body heaving with the motion. “I was a twelve-year-old boy once a very, very long time ago.”
“If you’re going to tell me it gets easier, you might as well save your breath,” Hunter spat.
“If only,” Chanter answered. “For you, it gets harder. Ten years from now, you’ll be alone, lying bleeding out in a ditch after some other, bigger, smarter, stronger wolf rips your throat out. If you’re lucky, you’ll be so fucked up, strung out on drugs you won’t feel the panic fluttering in your gut as your heart beats its last. If you’re not, you’ll lie there in the mud, calling for your mother while you piss and shit yourself as your body shuts itself down. You die cold and alone, exactly as you’ve lived.”
Hunter’s eyes widened. “How…How do you know that?”
<
br /> “It’s a scenario I’ve seen many times. You are not the first angry young man in the world, Hunter. But it’s not the only future waiting for you. You can cut the crap, kid, and realize you’re not tough shit. You sit. You stay. And, when you’ve finally extracted your cowardly head from your backside, you’ll learn a thing or two. This is not a life you can live hard and fast and long all at once. Even if you turned out to be a badass instead of some snot nosed brat looking to start a fight because he has nothing better to do—which I promise you, you’re not—then know this: there is always someone out there bigger and badder than you.”
Hunter swallowed. “I…uh…”
“This isn’t a discussion. I’ve said my part. The ball is in your court now, boy. We’re done with it. Now comes the matter of your future with this pack.” Chanter cleared his throat, stifled a cough and lifted his head. “Tonight, you go with Saloso. Do as you’re told. Listen. Learn. How it goes will factor greatly in our next vote on what’s to become of you. Prove yourself and we will see how you shift under one of the next full moons.”
“Really?” Hunter’s eyes lit up. I hadn’t seen him so excited since last Christmas.
Chanter gave a singular nod of his head. Hunter beamed and Chanter allowed himself a small smile. “Go on in, Hunter. Saloso’s in the back.”
Hunter darted by the both of us so fast I was surprised he didn’t leave a miniature tornado in his wake. I moved to follow, but Chanter stopped me, putting a hand gently on my shoulder. “Tonight, you must stay here.”
“He’s my son.”
“Not tonight.” Chanter retracted his hand. “Tonight, he is a prospective member of the Silvermoon pack. He will have to do this without you.”
“He’s twelve years old!” I gestured toward the house. “He’s a kid!”
“He’s a young man, Judah, and it’s high time you cut the umbilical cord before it poisons more than just your relationship with your son.”
“I’m his mother. It’s my job to protect him.”
Chanter nodded and said, “I knew you would say that. How about you and I make a deal? You stay and I will, too. I will stay and help you with your case.”
My mouth worked but it took me a few tries to get out what I wanted to say. “You’re not going with the pack?”
“There will be other full moons for me.” He pulled open the front door and gestured to it with his cane. “Now, come inside. Nina wants to show you how to use the oxygen just in case.”
Inside, Ed, Mara and Valentino were at the kitchen table. Mara was rubbing Ed’s shoulders. Leo was on the floor behind them banging two pillows together. Only Mara looked up when I came in, and I gestured for her to follow me into the living room. Mara, Leo and I would be staying behind while the rest went out. Well, I guessed Chanter was going to stay now, too, but it was his choice. I told myself he wasn’t staying because he had to but because he wanted to. It was easier for me to accept than thinking of him as too weak to shift.
We went into the living room where Nina was waiting. While Chanter went to sit in the recliner, she hurried me through the basics of running the oxygen machine. It was pretty straight forward, I thought, but she made me do it once while she watched, just to make sure I understood.
After she was satisfied with my ability to turn the knob on the tank, she nodded, crossed her arms and addressed her father. “If you’re staying and Saloso is taking Hunter, who’s going to lead the hunt tonight?”
Chanter ignored her obvious power play in favor of Valentino. Instead, he gave her a dismissive wave. “Get everyone together in here. We need to have a little chat.”
Over the course of the next ten minutes or so, the living room filled up. Mara and I slid to the back of the room. No one else took the empty spaces on the sofa next to Chanter. They sat on the floor, on their knees and cross-legged, facing Chanter. Hunter came in with Sal but broke off to stand with Mara and I. Sal stepped gingerly to the front and sat down on his knees just inches away from Chanter.
Chanter rolled his eyes over the room, each person stilling as his gaze fell on them. “I will not be going on the hunt tonight.”
A roar of objections followed. Sal and Valentino locked eyes.
Chanter held up a hand, quieting the room. “I wasn’t finished. We’ve long been in closed door talks about Hunter. All of you have made your opinions known on whether or not he belongs here. I know there are a lot of personal feelings, many of them guided by past events that don’t even concern him. Tonight, you will put them aside. It’s time we made him an official prospective member of the pack. Saloso.”
“Yes, Alpha,” came Sal’s answer.
“You brought him to us. These past months, you’ve acted as an informal guide. Are you willing to make a formal bid as his sponsor into this pack?”
I reached over for Hunter’s hand and tried to wrap my fingers around it. He jerked it away and folded his arms.
Sal glanced back at us before answering. “I am.”
Chanter nodded. “Are there any objections? Speak now or else hold your tongue.” In the crowd, Nina shifted, digging an elbow into Valentino who shrugged her off. “Nina,” Chanter barked. “Something to say?”
She lowered her head. “I was only wondering about the timing of this. With you staying home and Saloso going off with a prospective member, who will lead the hunt tonight? Are you sure now is the right time?”
“Are you questioning my leadership?”
“No, Alpha.”
“Are you objecting to Sal’s sponsorship of the boy?”
She shook her head.
“Then be silent,” Chanter told his daughter with a frown before turning back to address Sal. “Very well, Saloso. His successes will be yours and yours his. His failures are now yours and yours his. Hunter, do you understand?”
Hunter uncrossed his arms. “Yeah. I mean, I think so.”
“Hopefully, it will be clearer after tonight. You will go with Saloso and do everything he orders of you. Your future with the Silvermoons depends on it. Everything you do, know we are watching you. Act as if we are. Do you promise to do that, boy?”
Hunter cleared his throat. “Yes, sir.”
“Good,” Chanter grunted. “Now, as to the matter of who leads tonight. Valentino, you seem eager to prove yourself. Take the pack out tonight. Bring back something worthy of your time.”
Valentino lowered his head a little before answering. “Yes, Alpha.”
I glanced around the room, amazed again at how everyone transformed in semi-formal situations like this. Their faces were solemn, reflective, as if they were sitting in a church and not Valentino’s living room. Chanter ceased being a friend, a father or an uncle. He was an alpha and each of them owed him their attention and respect.
Chanter gave a dismissive gesture with his hand. “Judah, Mara, Leo…You’ll sit with me. The rest of you, you have your assigned tasks. I will see you at dawn.”
The pack filed out the back door and into the fenced in yard. It was dusk and a good wind was blowing. The gate to the yard was undone and the wind was blowing the handle into the hitch with a gentle, metallic tap. I followed as far as the patio, standing in silence as everyone but Sal and Hunter stripped off their clothing and started to shift.
I used to have nightmares about the sounds and sights. When they shifted, werewolves weren’t reborn. It was more as if they crawled out of their human skins, shaking off the blood like water. They let free a beast with jaws and claws, capable of killing full grown men. By the sounds of it, it was painful, too. The cursing and cries of anguish made me wonder why anyone would ever choose to shift as they do. As it had been explained to me, not shifting was just as dangerous. It led to all kinds of negative health effects. To hear Sal and Chanter tell it, failure to shift was a leading contributor to the high number of werewolf suicides. For them, it was either the momentary pain of shedding one skin for another or long, drawn out emotional torment faced alo
ne.
I hoped the shift would do Hunter some good, help him sort out some of those negative emotions. There was no cure for teenage apathy and I didn’t expect it to go away overnight. Still, I hoped being a part of something like the pack would get Hunter to open up more. Ever since he’d been kidnapped and nearly killed by two wendigoes, he’d become even more distant. One of them had eaten the meat right off of his finger. The exterior injury had healed, but he was broken inside. I thought counseling would help, but he wouldn’t talk. Eventually, we just stopped going. Perhaps all the emotional support he needed was that of a pack. I watched him on the edge of the patio, standing next to Sal, shifting his weight from one side to the other, wondering if he was as nervous as I was about how this night would go for him.
“What are you going to do?” I asked Sal when he came to stand next to me.
“I’ll put him in the truck. We’ll drive out to the middle of nowhere and get a fire going. If it were Chanter, he’d spout a bunch of Indian mystic bullshit but I don’t think the kid’s going to respond to that. I’m going to give it to him straight. He needs to pull his shit together and man up.”
I turned to face him. “What if this doesn’t work? What if he doesn’t respond or things get worse?”
“I’m not going to let that happen,” Sal answered firmly. “I promise you. Hunter is safe with me.”
“I know. I trust you. It’s just…”
“Nerves?”
I nodded. “He’s my only son, Sal.”
“I know,” Sal said with a small smile. “You’d go to hell and back for him. You pretty much did last summer. I’d hate to have been on the wrong side of that righteous rage.”
He grabbed my hand and squeezed it until it hurt before bending down to try to kiss me on the cheek. I turned my head away, not even thinking about it. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to be close to Sal. I didn’t not want it, either. I just couldn’t afford it, not with my job. And he needed a clear head to make it through to Hunter. I didn’t want those lines to get blurred.