A hint of a smile touches her lips and I can’t help but let out a small laugh.
“Okay,” I say.
“Okay, what?” she asks hesitantly.
“I’ll quit”
“You’ll quit?” she asks, her eyes going wide and a trace of a smile on her lips.
“Isn’t that what you want?” I ask with a laugh.
“Yeah, I just didn’t expect you to agree, at least not now.”
“What can I say? I’ve always wanted a selfish bitch, especially one that was selfish over me.”
Emilie laughs and smacks me on the arm. “When?”
“I can talk to the boss tomorrow.”
She squeals. “I can’t believe this!”
“Believe it,” I say as I move to the couch. I run my hand along the side of her face. She closes her eyes and nestles her cheek into my hand. I lean forward and plant my lips on hers. I hear her gasp before she kisses me back.
Please don’t let me regret this.
“And then what?” Adrienne asks excitedly.
“That was it. We kissed. It was the most amazing kiss I’ve ever had. I felt like he was kissing my soul.”
“Aww!” she squeals from the other side of the phone.
“He’s going to talk to his boss today and then we have plans to meet up tonight for our first official date as a couple.”
“So exciting! I’m so happy for you, Em. I want to talk more about this, but I have work to do. I’ll call you later, okay?”
“Okay.”
After talking with Adrienne, I clean the house, do laundry, and shower, all in hopes of passing time and not being nervous about tonight. I don’t even know why I’m nervous. We’ve been alone together before, but never with the thought that it would go anywhere. We were friends, flirtatious friends, but still friends. Maybe I’m nervous because I don’t know how it’s going to end. With sex or without sex?
Okay, time to get ready. Don’t think about sex, Emilie, just think about dinner.
Eating dinner.
I have something for him to eat.
No! Dammit. I can’t stop thinking about sex. It’s been too long.
I’m ready half an hour before Troy is supposed to be here. We’re going to some new, fairly fancy restaurant, so I decide to wear a simple, knee-length, ivory-colored dress. It has a few embellishments around the waist, but doesn’t look gaudy.
A few minutes before seven, I hear a knock at the door. After a quick glance in the small mirror on the wall, I rush to the door and let Troy in.
“Hey,” I say breathily, taking in the beautiful sight in front of me. He has on a simple, white button up shirt and black slacks, but he looks sexy as hell. He reaches up to rub the hair on his face, and the sleeve of his shirt moves, showing a hint of the black ink on his arm.
“Hi,” he responds, leaning forward and kissing my cheek. “You are breathtaking,” he says in a husky voice.
“Thank you. You too. I mean, in a manly way.” I want to kick myself for being so lame. “You look great,” I say, hoping my face isn’t too red.
Troy lets out a deep chuckle. “Thanks. Are you ready?”
“Yep.”
Once we’re seated across from each other in the dimly lit restaurant, I decide to ask him about his conversation with his boss.
“So, how did it go today?”
“With Liz? It was fine. She said there are too many girls stealing her favorite guys from her.” He smiles. “She calls all of us her favorites.”
“She wasn’t mad, was she?” I ask.
“Nah, I don’t think so. She said I can always go back if I want to.”
“Hmm. Well, hopefully you don’t want to.”
“Hopefully I won’t need to,” he responds with a small smile.
He brings a spoonful of soup to his mouth, and when he pulls it out, a small bit of soup lingers on his bottom lip. His tongue shoots out to lick it up, and I can’t pull my eyes away. I’m still thinking about how his lips felt like velvet on my own. How his tongue caressed mine with perfect skill. Thoughts of his lips and tongue on other places of my body flash through my mind.
“What are you thinking about over there?” he asks with a smirk.
“Huh? Nothing,” I answer unconvincingly.
He only smiles and goes back to eating. After a few moments he asks, “So you wanna go to Jace’s together on Christmas?”
My face splits into a grin. “Yeah, that would be great.”
The waiter comes by and brings our main course meals. I notice Troy is much quieter than usual. I wonder if he’s nervous. Maybe he’s thinking about whether it would be okay to have sex tonight or not. It’s technically our first date, but we’ve been skating around this for months. Something is definitely different with him, though.
“Troy, are you alright?” I ask.
He looks up at me. “Yeah, why do you ask?”
“You just seem a little different.”
He doesn’t respond. I let out a soft sigh and dig into my food.
“Actually, there is something I wanted to tell you.”
Uh-oh.
“Oh? What is it?” I ask, hoping I don’t sound as nervous as I feel.
“I just want to be honest with you. I know that’s important in relationships, and I know how it goes with these kinds of things, so I want you to hear it from me.”
I put my fork down and gulp. “Okay.”
“My ex, Carla, she came by my house the other day.”
He watches me carefully for a reaction. I’m surprised though, so I don’t say anything right away. When I realize that he isn’t going to say anything else, I clear my throat.
“Okay. What does that mean? Why did she go by?”
“Well, I’m not sure. She said she wanted to catch up and be friends. I tried to make it clear that I wasn’t interested, but she sent me a gift the next day asking to go to lunch, which we didn’t do.”
I feel jealous and angry at the same time. I have no idea what she looks like, and don’t want to, but of course I picture the prettiest super model type girl. I think about the history they have, and even though things ended bad, I can’t help but wonder if Troy would want to see if things could work between them again.
“So, you aren’t interested in seeing her anymore? Or being friends?”
“God no. I hope she leaves me alone. I don’t know how she found my new place, but I told her I didn’t care to catch up, and I never responded about lunch, so I’m hoping she got the message.”
“Well, okay. Thank you for telling me,” I say, forcing a smile.
This is the last thing a girl wants when starting a relationship with someone, an ex-fiancé coming back into the picture wanting to be friends. Yeah, I know that being friends isn’t what she wants. I try to get through dinner without thinking about it. I need to just focus on mine and Troy’s first date. The start of our new relationship, something I’ve been wanting for a while now.
“So, tell me about pre-escort Troy,” I say with a smile.
“Pre-escort Troy?” he asks with a laugh. “I’m afraid that’s not an interesting story.”
“I don’t care. I want to know.”
“Well, I went to college, got the degree my dad wanted me to get, and then got the job he wanted me to get. I followed in his footsteps and made good money, but wasn’t happy with the job. I was in a relationship with a girl who turned out to be one of Satan’s minions, and when that ended, I turned into escort Troy,” he says with a smirk.
“You’re right. That’s not interesting,” I laugh. “What was the job?”
“A private banker.”
I wrinkle my nose. “That sounds like a job for an old guy.”
“Yeah, my dad helped me move through the ranks pretty fast. He had a lot of contacts with very wealthy people and taught me everything he knew. So with his knowledge and my education, people knew that I knew what I was doing. If my dad wasn’t in the same business, I never would have made it as far a
s I did. It was stressful and I don’t miss it.”
“Do you still talk to your dad?”
“Yeah. Not every day or anything, but we talk. It took him a while to be okay with the fact that I didn’t want to do what he does. Anyway, what about you?”
“Well, I guess I’m not interesting either,” I say with a smile. “As you know, I lost my parents several years ago, but I’ve always had Adrienne. I had crappy jobs until my current job at The Coffee House. Working there has always been fun, even now as the owner. A bit harder, yes, but I love it. I’ve also had a bunch of crappy relationships, nothing too serious. That’s it.”
“We’re quite the interesting pair,” he says with a crooked smile.
“Did you know the guys before your escort days?”
He shakes his head. “No. I met them through the agency. I met Jace first and he and I hit it off right away. We’re pretty similar in a lot of ways. He was working at the agency first, and helped me out a lot when I started. Marc I met a little later. Him and Jace had known each other but didn’t really hang out. One night, me and Marc went out together with a couple clients, and I got to know him better. I told Jace we’d have to all hang out and that was that.”
“How is Marc? I mean, I haven’t talked to him a whole lot, but there’s something about him. He has a story, but I don’t know what it is. He’s quite mysterious.”
“Marc’s just a genuinely nice guy. I swear nothing ruffles his feathers. He’s so laid back.”
I nod. “And the others?”
“Kade is still very new, but seems cool enough. Nico is crazy,” he laughs. “He’s like our baby brother. We have to watch out for him, but he’s got a good heart. He’s been around a couple years.”
After we finish our meal and he pays the bill, we settle into his car and drive back to my house. We play a game of favorites and this or that.
This or That is a preference game allowing you to choose one thing over another. You get to know someone a little better depending on what options you give them. I’ve always loved this game.
“Favorite color?” he asks.
“Red. Yours?”
“White.”
“I’ve noticed,” I say. “You’re always wearing white, but I like it. It looks good on you.”
He smiles a perfect smile. “Coke or Dr. Pepper?”
“Coke. You?”
“Neither.”
“You don’t drink soda?” I ask incredulously.
“Not really. If I do, it’s mixed with liquor.”
“What do you drink?”
“Water, Gatorade, juice. Anything besides soda, really.”
“Red meat or seafood?” I ask.
“Definitely red meat.” He taps on the steering wheel and lets out a mmm sound, like he’s thinking. “Got one. Oral sex or regular sex?”
I gape at him. “What? Only one? For the rest of my life?”
He smiles and glances at me briefly before focusing on the road again. “Yep. Just one.”
“This is a dumb game and a dumb question.”
“You chose the game,” he says through a chuckle.
“You chose the stupid question. What if I asked you that?”
“You didn’t, and it’s your turn to answer, so answer.”
I scoff and start thinking about it, but after a couple minutes, I throw my hands in the air.
“I can’t choose! I need both! I think all sex should start off with oral sex. It’s helpful.”
Troy begins laughing. “It’s helpful?”
“Yes. You can’t just try to stick it in. What if it’s not wet down there, yet?”
“I don’t think I’d have any problems making sure you were ready, with or without the use of my tongue,” he says huskily.
Thoughts begin running through my mind, and I’m silent for too long.
“Don’t worry. I love doing them both,” he says with a wink.
“Oh, yeah. Good,” I stammer.
The game continues until he pulls up in front of my place. We learn new little things about each other while having some laughs.
He rounds the car, coming to my door to open it for me.
“Thank you,” I say as I stand up.
“No problem.”
He walks me to my door, and I can’t help but wonder if he’s going to come inside with me, or are we going to have a proper first date and end it with a kiss. Once we’re near the door, I start digging through my purse, trying to find my keys. With keys in hand, I unlock the door and push it open slightly. I face Troy and give him a smile.
“Thank you for tonight. I had a lot of fun.”
“Me too,” he says with a smile.
He grabs my hand in his, brings it to his mouth and kisses my knuckles. His dark brown eyes flicker up to mine and I lick my lips. Troy holds on to my hand but pulls me closer as he leans down, his mouth getting closer and closer to mine. My stomach is doing flips in anticipation of this kiss. His other hand comes up and caresses the side of my face, his thumb grazing my lips. His eyes linger on my mouth before his hand moves to the back of my neck. I shiver as he lightly tugs on my hair, moving my head marginally to the right. He releases my hand and places his own on my hip, his fingers barely touching the top of my ass. Troy brings his mouth to my neck and I feel his nose and lips moving from the base of my throat to my ear. I close my eyes, waiting for more; my hand goes to his waist, pulling him closer.
I feel his tongue touch the skin below my earlobe, sending sparks through my body. I let out a small moan, and then he quickly turns and pushes me against the wall next to my front door. His hips are pinning me in place, and his tongue and lips make their way down my neck.
He pulls away and I force my eyes open to look at him. His eyes are full of lust and he’s looking at me like he’s deciding if he wants to fuck me right here, outside of my apartment. I almost hope for it, but my hopes are suddenly shot down.
“Goodnight, Emilie,” he says huskily as he leans down and gives me two, slow, soft, and tongue-less kisses on my mouth. “I’ll call you later.”
I give what I imagine is a weak nod and watch him walk back down to his car, he runs a hand over his head like he’s frustrated. Him and me both. When he’s gone, I peel myself off the wall, walk inside, and look for B.O.B.
The day after my date with Emilie, I still can’t stop thinking about how I left her standing there against the wall. Of course I wanted to take her inside and fuck her like crazy. It’s what I’ve been wanting to do since I met her, but now that we’re trying to be in a real relationship, I feel like I should treat her differently than my clients. Maybe going slow isn’t a bad thing to do. I don’t know how the fuck I’m gonna do it, but I can try.
I’m pulled out of my thoughts when I hear my doorbell sounding off. When I pass my front window, I try to see get a glimpse of a car so I know who’s here, but there isn’t one that I can see.
I pull open the door and Carla is standing in front of me looking at the ground.
“Carla, what the fuck? You can’t just show up here whenever you want.”
She raises her head and I can tell she’s been crying. Her eyes are red and slightly puffy and her makeup is smeared under her eyes.
“I’m sorry, Troy. I just needed someone to talk to. Can I please come in? I won’t stay for long.”
I curse under my breath and run my hand over my face. “I guess,” I say, opening the door a little wider.
She comes in and stands awkwardly in front of the door. “Thank you, Troy.”
“What’s going on?” I ask, crossing my arms across my chest.
“Can I sit?” she asks softly.
“Yeah,” I answer, gesturing towards the living room.
Once we’re settled, her on the couch, and me in the single chair on the opposite side of the room, she begins talking.
“Today is my parent’s anniversary,” she says, sniffling. She wipes a tear from her eye and looks down at her hands. “They would have been married
thirty years today. I just miss them so much.”
“I’m sorry, Carla,” I say, because I have no idea what else I could say. Nothing will make it better or easier. However, I don’t know what she expects me to do. I’m not gonna hold and console her, because I don’t want her to take it the wrong way.
“I don’t have anybody else to talk to, Troy. There’s nobody to call or visit. I’ve been crying since last night and just didn’t want to be alone anymore. I’m sorry for intruding, but you’re the only person I know. The only other person who knew them, too.”
She begins crying again, so I get up and get some tissue from the bathroom. I return to the living room and stop next to the couch, handing her the tissue. She looks up at me, tears running down her face, and gives me an appreciative but sad smile. When she grabs the tissue she also grabs my hand.
“You’ve always been good to me, Troy.”
I nod my head once and pull my hand back. “Look, Carla, I’m really sorry about your parents. I can’t imagine that kind of loss.”
“Why do I feel like there’s a but coming up?” she asks.
“Well, you just can’t come over here like this. We aren’t together, and I have a girlfriend now, and it’s not right. If she were to find out, it would cause a lot of problems,” I say, shaking my head.
“Girlfriend, huh? She’s not okay with you having friends?” She wipes the tears from her cheeks.
“Don’t be ridiculous. I can have friends, but you and I have a history, and she wouldn’t be okay with us hanging out.”
She looks down at her hands again. “So there’s no way for us to be in each other’s lives? Not as a couple and not even as friends?” Carla looks back up at me, tears brimming in her eyes. “I can accept us never being a couple again, Troy. I know I messed up, and I’ll live with that mistake for the rest of my life. I just need a friend. You’re all I have, and just knowing that I have you to talk to from time to time is all I want. I don’t want to cause problems in your life; I just want the chance to be in it in some small way.” She pauses and takes a breath. “I know you don’t want to hear this, Troy, but I still love you. You will always have a piece of my heart, and I’ll always know you were the one who got away.”
Unforgivable Sin Page 5