by RR Haywood
‘You’re wrong,’ the woman shouts, she is middle aged with a stern face, ‘we took the time and effort to make this place suitable so we have the right to be safe here.’
‘What if this place became unusable,’ Sarah cuts in quickly, ‘what would you do then? If you knew there was another safe place nearby?’
‘That’s not the point,’ the woman shouts back.
‘It’s exactly the point, the man with the baritone voice interjects, ‘if we lost this place then we’d have to go and ask for help from somewhere else and that could happen!’
‘Why put ourselves and our children at risk for people we don’t know,’ the woman shouts louder clearly annoyed at having a member of her own group turn on her.
‘But we do know them,’ the man replies, ‘they’re here and we’ve met them so we do know them. What’s next? We start having tribal fort war’s at the same time as fighting the zombies out there. This is utterly ridiculous. We should be out there doing what we can to get rid of them.’
‘Don’t be so bloody stupid,’ the woman screams with blind fury, ‘are you suggesting that we go out there and hunt them down? Have you seen what they’re capable off?’
‘Howie,’ the man turns to me suddenly, ‘how many have you killed?’
‘Me personally or all of us together?’
‘Your group, how many?’
‘Bloody hell, Dave could probably tell you the actual number…er…’
‘Twelve thousand four hundred and twenty eight,’ Dave says flatly.
‘Jesus mate have you really been counting them?’ Our whole group stares at him shocked.
‘No, I made it up. I don’t know how many,’ Dave gives a very small smile which causes Blowers, Cookey, Nick and I to burst out laughing at the exceptionally rare attempt at humour from this quiet man
‘Sorry, I don’t know but it’s got to be thousands. We killed loads just travelling round but then we had that big fight a couple of days ago and that would have wiped out several thousand of them.’
‘More than that,’ Clarence says thoughtfully, ‘if you think about what you told us about Salisbury, then London, then our commune and the last fight…’ He trails off with both eyebrows raised.
‘Think how many the GPMG took out,’ Nick adds.
‘And those trenches we blew up,’ Cookey muses.
‘The housing estate…that must have killed a couple of thousand on its own,’ Nick rubs his chin thinking.
‘Yeah, fair one,’ I nod back and turn to look round at the people staring at me, ‘we’ve probably taken out tens of thousands then.’
‘With how many of you?’ The man asks like a friendly barrister cross examining a star witness.
‘Not that many really, we lost a few here and there but on the whole we’ve stayed remarkably intact for such a small group. Don’t get me wrong we lost thousands during that big fight outside our fort but we killed far far more than we lost and what we’ve gained from that is a real chance of living safely for a while, and it’s not just that but we learnt how to fight them, what hurts them, when to stand our ground and when to retreat…I guess more than anything we learnt not to fear them entirely,’ I look round to see everyone hanging on my words, ‘they’re frightening and all that, truly terrifying really but they’re not the super human monsters you think they are. You’ve seen what they’re like in the daytime from your tennis court experiment, bloody hell any one of my lot could take down a horde three or four times that size with just a knife if they stayed like that,’ I sense the lads all sitting up higher at the compliment.
‘But the real strength is having complete faith in your mates beside you,’ Clarence jumps in, his deep voice and large frame mesmerising the people watching us, ‘knowing that they’ll stand on the line and hold their courage.’
‘Bloody hell, you said you’ve loads of shotguns here,’ I look directly at Dean who nods in response, ‘they are devastating to a packed horde, form a couple of lines up and have synchronised firing, front line fires while the rear line loads and just blast them away, use the multiple exits you’ve got here to run out shoot a load and get back in, then find another door and do it again. Darren’s only got a day so even he can’t muster that many.’
‘Thousand at the most,’ Dave adds and I wish he hadn’t because a thousand sounds like a massive number, it is a massive number and I groan inwardly as mouths start to drop open at hearing it.
‘A thousand?’ the woman asks loudly.
‘At the most,’ Dave shrugs.
‘Dean. You’ve heard what these men have said,’ the man with the rich voice picks up his thread quickly, ‘even if they do bring a thousand…or five thousand it means we can finish them off and have a chance at living in safety.’ I look at Dean who remains expressionless, clearly thinking hard.
‘Mate, whatever you decide we’ll stand by, if you want us to go out and head them off we will on the condition that you promise to get our group to the boats as soon as possible.’
‘You’d go out against a thousand of them?’ Dean asks me seriously.
‘Yes.’
‘At night?’
‘Yes mate…have you seen Dave fight? Trust me the odds aren’t that bad.’
‘What that little thing?’ the woman’s scornful tones cut through the room as the lads all take a sharp intake of breath and I glance over to see Sarah, Ted and the officers all looking shocked. Only Dave stays as devoid of expression as ever.
‘That little thing has probably killed more of them than the rest of us put together,’ Clarence’s voice seethes with anger, going red in the face he stands up his massive frame seeming to dominate the room. The lads stand with him and look equally as angered, ‘that little thing is the bravest man I have ever met and I’ve been in more combat zones than you could count,’ he leans forward and presses his fists into the table which creaks under his weight, ‘and that little thing would willingly go out there alone against ten thousand if he was asked. Excuse me…I need some air.’ He turns to find a sudden gap opening up which he strides through with Sarah hot on his heels.
‘I think we all do,’ I reply, ‘sorry to ask but have you got sentries or look outs posted?’
‘Yeah all round,’ Dean replies.
‘Good then we’re going outside to cool off and let you talk in peace,’ we turn to file out and I wait to hear someone say we can’t go outside but thankfully they seem distracted and no one yells after us. As I walk through the first tunnel the man with the rich voice runs to catch up with me.
‘Paul,’ he extends a hand to shake, ‘I’m sorry about that but tensions are high as you can see.’
‘Nice to meet you Paul, don’t worry but that woman was getting offensive and after what we’ve been through you can’t blame the lads for reacting that way.’
‘God no, I’m amazed you stayed as cool as you did, listen we’ll have a proper chat and come and find you when it’s done.’
‘Thanks mate I appreciate that.’
‘Dean is a very decent man, he might have looked quiet back there but the man has a steel rod running through his core.’ We leave Paul in one of the big rooms to head back and speak to Dean while we thread our way through the complex of tunnels and bunkers. Word spreads as we go through that we’re going outside and suddenly many people are heading for the doors and exits.
‘They’ve been cooped up in here since this began,’ Ted explains as we walk through the darkened tunnels.
‘Shit I’m starting to wish I hadn’t said we’re going out now, it’ll just look like we’re trying to undermine Dean.’
‘I don’t think you could stop them if you tried Howie,’ Ted replies with a smile. We follow the crowds out through a different route to a door further back in the park, coming out into the car park and I see our inner group all standing to one side. Some of the local guards look very unhappy at nearly all the fort’s residents suddenly pouring out for a few minutes of sunshine and fresh air. Standing together we
look over at children racing to the play area, screaming and yelling with delight while worried looking parents run after them telling them to be quiet.
‘Hey mate,’ I shout up at one bemused looking guard standing on the top of the wall, ‘we’ll go to the top where we came in and keep guard if you want.’
‘Cheers mate,’ the man smiles and gives a thumbs up before speaking into a small radio fastened to the front of his black overalls.
We file through the car park towards the entrance, looking round I see nearly our whole group here. The officers, Sarah and Clarence, the lads and Lani, Dave and even that woman that helped Sarah in the back of the van on the way from London to the fort. Steven and Tom both keep sneaking glances at the sawn off shotguns wedged into the backpacks of the lads and looking down at their own full length double barrelled weapons.
We find a spot on the grassy area by the pitch and putt and settle down in a wide semi-circle angled to watch the entrance path.
‘I’ll go and have a quick look up there Mr Howie,’ Dave says indicating the path.
‘I’ll come with you,’ Lani adds quickly. Nodding at both of them I wonder why she’s chosen our group to stand by when surely this lot would have taken her in seeing as she’s a local.
‘Howie you can’t be serious at going to head them off, that was a bloody stupid thing to say,’ Sarah wastes no time in voicing her opinion.
‘What choice do we have?’
‘Plenty of choices Howie,’ Sergeant Hopewell cuts in, ‘I see where you’re coming from but you’ve already marched out to battle once and no one is expecting you to do it again.’
‘I disagree,’ Blowers interrupts, ‘if this lot don’t want us and they get all nasty then they could make life very hard for our people. If it means they get a chance of getting back safely then we have to do it.’
‘Simon you don’t have to keep saving everyone,’ Sarah replies.
‘Simon? Who’s Simon?’ I ask confused.
‘Me, that’s my first name,’ Blowers laughs.
‘Shit, I’d forgotten you even had one.’
‘Stop changing the subject Howie,’ Sarah chides as Nick and Cookey both laugh and start ragging Blowers by calling him Simon.
‘Sarah, we’re not being heroes but if it has to be done then so be it.’
‘You lot are getting addicted to killing them that’s what it is,’ Sarah says firmly, ‘I could see it in your faces before that big fight and downstairs, it’s like a thrill to you, being all heroic and going out against thousands of them like that.’
‘No it’s not,’ Clarence cuts across her.
‘Then what is it because I don’t understand. Surely it would be better to sit and wait it out here than risk dying again, how many chances do you need?’ She looks round first at Clarence then me and finally at the lads, ‘how many times are you going to risk your lives? Until every zombie is dead? Are you going to go out and kill all of them? Just you few?’
‘Nah, we’ll just send Dave,’ Cookey mutters.
‘Don’t be funny Alex,’ Sarah retorts quickly and I watch as Cookey sinks lower from the sudden tongue lashing, ‘right I’ll tell you what,’ she looks round at us again, ‘if you go out there then I’m coming with you.’
‘Oh hang on…’ I start to say getting cut off by protests from the others too.
‘And me,’ Terri speaks for the first time and I can see from her face that she means it.
‘Oh no just wait a minute…’
‘Me too,’ Ted looks as serious as the others.
‘All of us,’ Sergeant Hopewell joins in.
‘Can we saw our shotgun ends off too?’
‘Be quiet Steven.’
‘Sorry Sarge.’
‘For fuck’s sake,’ I say exasperated.
‘What?’ Terri asks, ‘what is it Howie? If you’re saying that it’s so important to save these women and children that you’d go out and fight another battle then why not us too?’
‘Well because…’
‘We don’t have children,’ she adds without letting me speak, ‘we’re just as capable as you at fighting and defending our group, we can shoot guns and swing axes about the same as you can.’
‘None of you are combat trained,’ Clarence replies quickly but gets shot down instantly by Sarah.
‘He’s a supermarket manager,’ she points at me, ‘and they were on their first day in the army,’ she moves her pointing hand to the lads.
‘But they’ve got experience now,’ he rumbles.
‘And how did they get that experience?’ Terri asks, ‘by being herded away and kept safe? No? By getting out there and fighting that’s bloody how.’
‘I agree,’ Lani adds in her strong confident voice, ‘I’ve only just joined and I’m sorry for interrupting,’ she adds.
‘Don’t be sorry,’ Sarah smiles up at her, ‘here sit down, I’m Sarah.’
‘But I’ve killed a few of them and I’ve already decided that if you go out there then I’m coming too.’
‘Why?’ Nick asks quickly.
‘They killed my family, they killed everyone I know so why is it just your right to get revenge?’ Lani replies looking up, proud and defiant.
‘It’s not about revenge,’ I say.
‘Yes it is,’ Sergeant Hopewell cuts in, ‘when you and Dave came to the police station that day you said you had to find your sister, but you found her Howie and now she’s safe so why keep going?’
‘Well because she needs to get back to the fort,’ I reply weakly.
‘Oh that’s big of you,’ Sarah growls at me, ‘why do I need to get back? Why am I different to everyone else here?’
‘Ah this is getting silly,’ I throw my hands up.
‘Dave what do you think?’ Sarah turns to Dave sitting quietly next to me. He looks at me for long seconds blank faced before answering.
‘Men fight. Always have done. Men fight to protect their families and what they hold dear. Men fight for all sorts of reasons but that’s just the way it is…’
‘Thank you Dave,’ I smile feeling like I’ve won the point.
‘…But so do women,’ he adds to my audible groan, ‘women fight harder than men when they need to, women can be ferocious in battle, ask Clarence.’ The big man nods reluctantly.
‘Cheers Dave,’ I groan.
‘That’s okay Mr Howie.’
‘I was being sarcastic.’
‘I know.’
‘Well I’m glad that’s cleared up then,’ Sarah smiles triumphantly and I look round to see nearly everyone grinning and Ted shaking his head with a small knowing smile.
‘You walked into that one son,’ he says.
‘Yeah I get that impression.’
‘So can we saw the ends off now?’ Steven asks hopefully.
‘Yes mate, if we all go out together then you can saw the ends off.’
‘Brill!’ He sounds delighted and gets a stern look of disapproval from the Sergeant. Clarence and I exchange unhappy glances and he shrugs his huge shoulders like two boulders lifting up and down.
‘If nothing else it’s worth it to see that,’ Ted says after a few minutes silence. I follow his gaze to the playground and the children running about freely. Some of the parents join in on the monkey bars and roundabout, others stand around with a mixture of happy and worried faces. Their laughter and giggles sound out into the quiet summer air and I can imagine this place being crammed during a normal summer day. A ball gets kicked onto the grass and bounces over towards us and I watch Nick starting to shrug his backpack off discretely. Cookey catches the movement and starts doing the same, both of them speeding up to beat the other one until Lani ditches her bag into the middle and sprints past them laughing. With shouts they burst up and start sprinting for the ball as Blowers slowly stubs his cigarette out and starts taking his pack off too. Lani reaches the ball first and kicks it back to the children just as she’s joined by Nick and Cookey. Within seconds a game has started with items of
clothing being set down as goals and the children trying to beat our group. More children come running up as Steven and Tom both join in too, laughing and calling for the ball.
‘Looks like they need a goalie,’ Clarence surprises us all by jogging over leaving the rest of us now minding several axes, shotguns and backpacks.
‘When did you start smoking again?’ Sarah calls out as she catches me lighting one up and blowing a lazy plume of smoke out.
‘Er…today actually.’
‘It’s bad for you,’ she chides.
‘So are zombies,’ I retort quickly. Clarence takes over in goal, squatting down to get ready for some saves until one plucky child shouts that he’s too big and the goal has to be made bigger.
‘There’s Dean,’ Dave nods past me at the approaching man accompanied by several of his group. Getting slowly to my feet I walk a few paces forward and watch as he tells his friends to wait and walks on to speak with me alone. Greeting me with a nod he stands watching the children play for a couple of minutes and I get the impression he’s still trying to make a final decision.
‘It would have been okay if he hadn’t mentioned there could be a thousand of them,’ he says finally.
‘I don’t know where he got that number from Dean.’
‘It is possible though isn’t it?’
‘Yeah it is,’ I sigh already knowing what the answer is. We lock eyes for a second and I feel pleased that despite the bad news he has the decency to look me in the eye.
‘I’m sorry Howie but we put it to a vote and well…’
‘Don’t worry mate, I pretty much expected it.’
‘If it’s any consolation I voted for you to stay but they just got hung up on the thought of a thousand of those things coming this way.’