by RR Haywood
Shots ping into the sides of the van, fewer now but more missiles get thrown as loud thunks bang of the metal sides.
‘Then suggest something,’ I plead with him.
‘Let me fire,’ Dave growls.
‘NO!’ Clarence roars, ‘If you fire on those kids I’ll fucking shoot you Dave.’
‘What then?’ I scream in desperation.
‘We give up and give them what they want, surrender,’ Clarence spits the last word out.
‘NEVER,’ Dave roars.
‘Dave we are not shooting children, we give up and let them have the weapons.’
‘They’ll kill us,’ he shouts in reply, ‘they’ll kill the lads and Mr Howie. Clarence this isn’t the army, this is different times. Mr Howie has to survive.’
‘Why? Why me?’
‘Because,’ Dave roars and I swear the van shakes from the emotion in his voice.
‘Because what?’ I shout back.
‘Clarence you do this and I swear I’ll fucking kill ‘em all,’ Dave roars.
‘Dave, this isn’t the way mate,’ Clarence shouts back, his tone softer now, ‘we are not child killers, we don’t do that.’
‘Dave, please listen to him,’ Lani shouts, ‘we can’t kill them.’
‘They are fucking shooting at us,’ Cookey shouts.
‘Mr Howie, you’re the boss…’ Blowers cuts everyone else down, ‘what you say goes, if you say we fight then we fight, if you say surrender than we do that without argument.’
‘Dave?’ Clarence prompts him, ‘do you hear that? Howie is boss here, what he says goes.’
‘I will not let them kill him that will not happen.’
‘It’s my choice Dave…You abide my order you hear me?’
‘Mr Howie,’ he growls in reply.
‘Dave! You abide my order DO YOU HEAR ME?’
‘Yes Mr Howie,’ he barks.
‘We surrender, you shout that now, you shout it loud Dave and make them hear.’
He pauses, our eyes locked and then he draws breath and bellows out, ‘CEASE FIRING! WE SURRENDER, CEASE FIRING, WE SURRENDER…’
Shouts from outside and gradually the shots and thumps end as the word is spread. I ease my foot of the pedal and the van instantly stops and cuts out. The only sounds are the engine cooling down with light clicks and clunks.
‘Mr Howie, I’ll charge and distract them, you run and get away,’ Dave pleads with me, his eyes wide and it’s the first time I’ve ever seen fear in his face.
‘No Dave,’ I smile back, ‘Clarence is right, we don’t kill kids.’
‘I won’t kill them I promise…I’ll fight with my hands and I promise I won’t kill any…’
‘Dave they’ll tear you apart, there’s over a hundred of them.’
‘That’s fine with me Mr Howie, but you got to get away, you have to survive,’ his eyes beg me, his tone soft and pleading.
‘I’ll fight with him Mr Howie,’ Blowers adds.
‘Me too,’ Cookey says.
‘And me,’ Nick says softly.
‘What? What the fuck has got into you? We do this together; I’m not running and leaving you to die.’
‘This isn’t your day to die Mr Howie,’ Dave continues, ‘you must survive and…and…’
‘And what Dave? Blowers what is this?’
‘You have to live Mr Howie,’ Blowers says matter of fact, ‘you lead and others follow. We wouldn’t have that fort without you; we wouldn’t have survived without you. It’s not us Mr Howie, it’s you. Others will follow you and you can lead them….you have to survive.’
‘Fuck off,’ I spit the words out in shock.
‘Boss, you do one and get away, we’ve got this,’ Clarence adds.
‘Not you too Clarence, you just you wouldn’t kill kids.’
‘I won’t kill‘ em but I can fucking batter them about for a bit.’
‘You’re all nuts, no…no…not happening…we stay together.’
‘If they go for you I swear I’ll end them,’ Dave curses.
‘No you won’t Dave, you promised me and that means something.’
‘COME OUT WITH YOUR HANDS UP,’ Maddox’s voice screams out.
‘COMING…DO NOT SHOOT,’ I shout back, ‘DO NOT SHOOT WE WILL NOT FIRE ON YOU.’
‘Boss, take the chance and go,’ Clarence urges.
‘Don’t ask me that again, any of you, not ever do you hear me? Do you hear me?’ I get murmurs of reply and look back to see Lani staring at me with an intense expression. Suddenly, the thought of them hurting her bites me inside. I want to ask her to go, to run away like they said I should but I know what the response will be.
‘Come on, weapons down,’ I shrug my pistol from my belt and lay it on the seat and push the door open slowly before clambering out with my hands held high.
‘WE ARE NOT ARMED…’ I shout clearly and walk slowly round to the side door, pulling it back and watching as my group files out one at a time, hands held high.
‘Dave, did you leave your knives?’ I ask him quietly.
‘Yes,’ he answers sulkily.
‘All of them?’
‘I’ve got one,’ he answers instantly, ‘small one in my boot.’
‘Okay, keep that one then.’ I only say it for fear of him suddenly reaching down to his boot and causing a reaction from the youths.
Maddox strides forward, the pistol held high and pointing at us. Youths gather behind him, pointing rifles and shotguns in our direction. We stay quiet as they converge, coming in close and surrounding us.
‘You will shoot each other,’ Clarence says.
‘What?’ Maddox snaps the pistol round to point it up at the big man.
‘You’ve got guns surrounding us, if you all fire you will shoot each other, you need one line in front and none behind.’
‘What the fuck?’ Maddox looks confused.
‘He’s right,’ Dave adds, ‘arcs of fire, basic skills.’
‘Move to the front,’ Maddox gives the order and waits while everyone shuffles round.
‘Shit, look at this bitch,’ a stocky lad pulls the heavy machine gun from the van, holding it in both hands while the youths stare in awe.
‘Be careful son, the safety might not be on, please check it.’ Clarence rumbles.
‘Why you doing this?’ Maddox suddenly demands.
‘Doing what?’ I ask him, knowing full well what he means.
‘Why you giving up bruv? You got guns, you got weapons and skills, you could fight.’
‘We don’t kill children,’ Clarence replies for me, ‘that’s not our way son.’
‘Stop calling me son,’ Maddox shouts.
‘I’m old and you are young, it’s a natural thing for me to say. I don’t shout when you call me bruv do I?’
‘We would have killed you; I told them to kill you…’ He says with anger still in his voice.
‘So kill us,’ I reply, ‘we’re here without weapons, you got the guns, go ahead.’
‘This ain’t some movie,’ Maddox says through gritted teeth, ‘ain’t no smart speech gonna save you now. Get down on your knees all of you.’
‘No,’ I reply with a dull tone.
‘Get down,’ he shouts and waves the pistol an inch from my face.
‘No, we won’t kill children so we surrendered but not one of us will beg or kneel in front of you.’
‘That bitch is well fit,’ one of the lads shouts from the massed ranks, clearly meaning Lani.
‘Watch your manners,’ Maddox turns and shouts surprising all of us, ‘Was that you Jermaine? You’re on toilet duty for the next week.’
‘Sorry Maddox,’ the lad replies in a humbled tone while the rest of us cast confused glances at each other.
‘Maddox, we have been fighting every day since this thing started, that’s ten solid days of fighting. We’ve killed tens of thousands of those things, we’ve slaughtered ‘em with guns and with our bare hands…if we wanted to fight you would all be dead, all
of you,’ my voice snaps his attention round, ‘but we didn’t because you are children. Nasty little shits yes, but still children. We have honour and integrity and we draw a line at that.’
‘Im not a child,’ he sneers.
‘No Maddox, you are clearly not a child mate, but the rest are and even if we killed you it would mean having to kill them, which we won’t do.’
‘How old are you?’ Blowers asks.
‘Eighteen,’ Maddox answers quickly.
‘You look older,’ Nick adds.
‘You been to prison?’ Cookey asks.
‘What? What the fuck is this?’ he spits.
‘You’re massive for an eighteen year old; I heard they got good gyms in prison.’
‘Cos I’m black you think I been in prison,’ he shouts.
‘No mate, cos your big, packed with muscle, and you’re from a council estate, it figures,’ Cookey replies with an easy tone.
‘Did he go to prison then?’ Maddox waves the pistol at Clarence.
‘Nah he’s just a freak,’ Cookey jokes, ‘eats everything.’
‘And snores like a fucking bear too,’ Nick adds as I smile at the disarming banter, one of the lads best weapons and they know it.
‘I bet Blowers would like prison,’ Cookey says softly.
‘Oh fuck off!’ Blowers sighs.
‘All them men in showers,’ Nick joins in, ‘oh did I drop the soap…let me bend over and pick it up.’
‘Fuck off,’ Blowers exclaims rolling his eyes, ‘I get this every bloody day,’ he shakes his head at Maddox.
‘Where’s Lenski?’ Lani asks.
‘What? What the…’
‘I am here,’ she pushes through the youths to stand just behind Maddox.
‘Hi,’ Lani nods at the woman.
‘Hello,’ she replies then stares at Maddox with her arms folded.
‘Well? You kill them now yes? That is what we do now yes? We kill everyone. So kill,’ she shrugs at him, her face blank.
‘Lenski,’ he says.
‘What?’ she snaps, ‘look at them, they surrender without the fight, look at their guns they could kill all of us. Why didn’t they do this?’
‘Are you two a couple?’ Lani asks.
‘Yes,’ Lenski replies quickly and I notice the youths looking at each other in surprise, ‘we are, but maybe not for long…’ her voice trails off as Maddox stares at her.
‘What are you worried about Maddox?’ I ask him, ‘that we’ll come back and get revenge? That we’ll try and save these kids? Mate, these kids can look after themselves and as for revenge, no offence but that’s not on our plan. There’s probably hundreds of communes and places like this round the country. We’re going back to our fort, and the only thing we’re interested in is killing those things.’
‘I couldn’t take that risk,’ he replies, ‘everyone will see us as weak, a base full of kids…’
‘Maddox, we’ve been all over the place. Those things are everywhere, all over the country. People are the rare species now. We’ve got no interest in your compound. We got a bloody great big fort of our own. I was trying to tell you before.’
‘You were demanding to know why those people attacked us.’
‘Yeah and maybe I was wrong to do that, but mate…killing people for their food is bad…’
‘Maddox was not in charge at this time no? The Bossman he make these rules and he give the children the drugs. The Bossman he try to kill Maddox but Maddox kill him and now he in charge. He say yesterday no more killing, no more of the drugs, he made the fence out there, he stop the children taking the drugs, he say to plant the food and make the crops yes? The Bossman he did the bad things but Maddox he try to fix this but only in last day, we need time to fix this.’ Lenski implored, looking between Maddox and I.
‘This true?’ I ask him.
‘Yeah,’ he replies.
‘Why didn’t you say before?’
‘Not your business,’ he shrugs.
‘Maddox, these are new times. I understand your suspicion and concern but I think we’ve proved ourselves now.’
‘Yeah,’ he suddenly looks defeated and slumps his shoulders. I realise the youths are looking at him with concerned expressions, their leader lost for words, the fight gone out of him. I glance over at Clarence, nodding at him to say something.
‘Er…so what you benching?’ He asks, I stare at him with a look of horror and mouth “what the fuck” he shrugs apologetically, “I don’t know” he mouths back.
‘What?’ Maddox shakes his head and looks at Clarence.
‘Must be well over hundred kilos, big lad like you.’
‘Yeah,’ his voice trailed off ‘let them go, give them their weapons back and let them go.’ He waves at the youths holding our assault rifles who suddenly look crestfallen.
‘Aah Maddox…’ One of them whines and gets a sharp look from Lenski. Reluctantly the youths hand the weapons back and I watch my group taking their rifles and checking magazines, pushing pistols back into their belt holsters. Dave moves into the van and starts pushing his knives back into his belt. Rucksacks get pulled out and swapped about. I take mine and shove my axe down the back before taking my assault rifle from Nick. All the time watching Maddox slouch away quietly with Lenski at his side.
‘Wait here,’ I say to the others and start moving after him, ‘Maddox, wait up mate.’
‘What?’ He turns quickly to watch me approaching.
‘You okay? You look like shit.’
‘Tired,’ he replies gruffly.
‘Take it easy mate; if what Lenski said was true then you’re doing the right thing. But you can’t give up and sulk in front of everyone like that.’
‘What I ain’t sulking,’ he replies quickly.
‘Just can’t do it. Everyone looks up to you mate, you got to lead them. They look confused now.’
‘It’s hard,’ he answers quietly showing just how young he really is, ‘I thought I was doing the right thing but then I sent them after you…that was a bad decision, so maybe I’m not doing the right thing.’
‘Everyone makes mistakes mate, that was a bad one admittedly, but it’s done now and you’ve recovered it. Move on and stick to the plan you had, it sounded a good one to me. Anyway, your estate is now pretty much cleared out; more might come but keep patrols out on the perimeters and keep checking. Have fall back points and make sure you got an escape route out of your compound. Go through the houses and secure everything you need. If you find other survivors protect them, they’ll be older and can teach you things. I don’t know everything but I got a good team and they help with everything we do. Also,’ I’m warming up now, ‘get those vehicles closer to your compound, they are a valuable commodity now. Don’t waste ammunition either, and get some medical books or something, you can’t leave it to chance with all those kids in one place. We’re a few miles down the coast, you send someone if you need help. If we can spare it we’ll send what we can, ask for Howie or Big Chris.’
‘Yeah…thanks,’ he nods, ‘er you too, if we can help with anything then just ask.’
‘That might just happen mate, you got a huge estate here that could easily be fenced in and secured. Just don’t be alarmed if that happens and people come here…and don’t kill them.’
‘We won’t Howie and I’m sorry for attacking you.’
‘It’s done, but for the record, you don’t know how close you came to losing everything mate. Those people in my group are nasty bastards if they get pissed off.’
‘It was good to meet you Maddox,’ I hold my hand out which he takes in a firm grip and smiles at me. A smile full of youth and future…and white teeth.
‘You too Lenski,’ I shake hands with the woman who stares with rapture at Maddox.
‘Take it easy,’ I turn and walk away, back to my group, ‘oh and can we have another vehicle?’
‘Yeah, take what you need, just bring it back!’ Maddox laughs.
‘That’s a deal mate,
’ I nod and head over to my group stood talking to the youths. The lads all trading jokes and banter with the kids, Clarence talking to some stockier lads about weight training and Lani staring with revulsion at a sixteen year old girl with a huge cleavage poking out from her low cut top.
‘We’re off,’ I shout over.
‘Again?’ Lani smiles.
‘Yeah again.’
Twenty-Nine
Maddox watches Howie walking away and glances over to the crews crowding round the men with guns. Shaking his head he sighs deeply and feels an overwhelming sense of shame at what almost happened. How he misread the situation and nearly risked the lives of so many more people.
‘Shit, this stuff is complicated,’ he says to Lenski.
‘Yes,’ she replies simply.
‘I’m sorry,’ he adds. Twice now in the last few minutes he’s apologised for his actions. Something he very rarely does.
‘I know,’ again she replies simply. He terrified her with his actions, with his thirst for action and violence only it wasn’t that. He was terrified too. Scared of those men coming back and hurting the kids. Lenski knows that’s why he went after them and for that loyalty to the kids she can forgive the dangerous and stupid action he took.
‘What now?’ She asks.
‘We carry on I guess,’ he scratches the side of his head with the end of the pistol, then realises what he’s doing and quickly shoves the gun away, tutting at himself. ‘That Howie had some good advice, perimeters and stuff.’
‘We should find their base so we know the place it is in yes? If we need doctor or something we can get there quickly then.’
‘Okay,’ he nods back, staring down at the ground. She moves in close and entwines her fingers in his and waits until he lifts his head. Then she kisses him. In full view of nearly every crew from the compound they kiss passionately, breaking away and looking round at the sea of young faces watching them quietly.
‘Wot you lot lookin’ at?’ Maddox shouts suddenly making them jump, he grins quickly then laughs at the surprised looks on their faces, ‘everyone back, we got a lot of work to do.’
‘What’s up?’ Darius asks, stepping in next to Maddox as they walk slowly back to the compound.