by RR Haywood
Paco strolls out of the trailer and across the concrete of the small town American film set. More and more filming was taking place in sets like these across Europe with lower costs and the average crew salary being far less than in the States.
He crosses the end of the set, stepping over snaking wires and rail tracks set up for the camera systems. Make-up units, lighting, sound engineers and a hundred other professionals all moving about and making ready. He steps a few more feet into the street, staring at a working set of mainstream American traffic lights, American road signs and American line markings on the road surface. Just the sight of it makes him feel a little homesick with a sudden longing to be back in his own country and away from the flat and weird tones of the English.
‘Paco! You look great! Have you been pumping up?’ The director yells loudly as he paces over the street towards him.
‘Hey Bob, no it’s just a tighter top,’ Paco replies without any sense of shame.
‘Okay Paco, this is the big scene. You’re walking down the street and you’ve already seen the zombies turning the corner and coming towards you right?’
‘Right,’ Paco nods listening intently.
‘So now, there is a few seconds of stand-off and then the woman comes running out from the side street, she’s screaming and not watching where she goes. She runs straight into them…bam! And they set on her right?’
‘Right Bob.’
‘You Paco, you look at them hard, then you see her and you look confused, then you look scared for her safety and you try to yell a warning…’
‘Hey lady?’ Paco suggests.
‘Yeah “hey lady” is great, you yell “hey lady” and you look terrified as she gets taken down.’
‘Okay Bob, so I look hard then confused then I yell and then I look terrified.’
‘That’s it Paco.’
‘Okay Bob and then what?’
‘Paco are you sure you read the script? Never mind, then we’ll get ready for the next scene which is you running at them and trying to save the woman.’
‘Okay Bob. Hard, confused, yell out then terrified…got it Bob.’
‘You’re a trooper Paco, a real trooper. Places everyone….’ Bob walks away waving his arms and shouting orders as the commotion suddenly ceases and perfect quiet descends. The horde of zombies are led out and put into position, a couple of them coughing and practising their groans while a few more jump up and down on the spot swinging their arms to limber themselves up.
‘This is a hot set,’ Bob bellows as he stalks backwards towards the camera equipment, ‘I want quiet on set…anyone so much as farts and they’ll be out of a job.’
Instant silence as everyone apart from the actors freezes in place. Anything that could rattle, jangle, shake or vibrate was gripped. Conversations ended abruptly. The atmosphere charged instantly as all eyes turn to Paco and the horde of zombies being quietly moved onto their exact spots. A long drawn out line of them with the most graphically created zombies at the front.
The unknown actress standing at the fake junction of the fake side road takes deep breaths as she prepares for her fifteen seconds of fame. Paco runs through his facial reactions, quickly practising them, contorting his face, angling his head and deciding whether to stand face on or angled to the side. Hard. Confused. Yell. Terrified. Got it.
‘Okay rolling camera…everyone ready….Action!’ Bob shouts out as the person with the digital clipboard moves out from in front of the main camera.
An instant groaning commences from the zombies as they finally get to use their undead voices for the first time. The camera pans in close to the first zombie who bites down on the capsule within his mouth, pushing the thick bloody gunk out to slide down his chin. His eyes rolling as he staggers towards the camera which pulls back smoothly bringing the whole of the horde into view.
Paco gives his “hard” look. Narrowing his eyes and tilting his chin up. Setting his mouth firm and glaring from his eyes. He breaths in knowing it will flare his nostrils slightly and increase the intense look.
The actress, reacting to a prompt, screams and runs from the side street. Camera’s swoop out to watch her progress. The zombies stumble and turn towards her, giving higher pitched growls. She flails her arms, windmilling wildly, her steps shorter than normal to give her that jerky out of control manner.
Paco takes his “hard” look and converts it smoothly into a look of “confusion”. What is this? What is this woman doing here? Why is she running into the horde of zombies? He gives his best puzzled frown. Plunging his eyebrows down and slightly squinting one eye while gingerly lifting his top lip and tilting his head. The camera was some distance away but he knew it would be zoomed in completely on his face and he held the look for seconds while the girl runs across the road.
‘Hey lady!’ Paco yells in a deep voice, taking a step forward and raising one muscled arm as though to pluck her away to safety.
The woman runs across the street straight into the midst of the horde. They grab out and take her down onto the pre-cushioned section of road surface.
Paco shifts his look, going from the “yell” to the “terrified” look seamlessly. He opens his mouth and makes his eyes go wide, again pushing the head back and off to one side. He knows he’s good at this. The close up reactions are a strong point of his.
‘My god…’ he says deeply, adlibbing on the spot.
‘CUT!’ Bob yells, ‘HOLD YOUR PLACES.’ Everyone knows what to do. Paco holds his place, watching with mild interest as the make-up and prop department move in. The actress is lowered into a pre-set hole in the ground with just her arms, shoulders and head left above ground. A prosthetic body exactly matching her from the shoulders down is rushed in and laid out perfectly to resemble her own body. The dress material on the dummies stomach has been weakened to allow it to be ripped open easily. The smooth skin of the prosthetic mid-section has been made to be torn open and the harmless fake innards, already pre-coated in glistening crimson fluid, were ready to be pulled out and bitten into. The upper thigh of the right leg was also primed for the flesh to be bitten away.
The crew move quickly as the zombie actors hold their positions, chatting quietly. The whole process is done within a couple of minutes and they move away leaving what appears to be the actress still lying on the ground with a horde of undead above her.
‘Paco, you wait a few seconds until you get the prompt. Then you yell out and run down towards them. Get your speed up and run straight past them, it’s the run up and the action of zombies eating the woman we need. The fight scene comes after, got it?’
‘Got it Bob,’ Paco replies, bouncing up and down to stretch his leg muscles out.
‘Zombie one, you go for the stomach, bite down and use your hands to tear the flesh open. Make it good because we get one shot at this. Zombie two, once zombie one has opened the flesh you get in and scoop some in the innards out, zombie three you go for the right thigh, zombie four you lean back and growl and thrash your head, zombie five you come and drop down to a crawl and start crawling towards them. I want you all into it, get the blood and gore on your faces and hands. Splay your fingers and show us the blood, Actress…’ Bob explains, not knowing her name and not caring either, ‘you scream and thrash your hands up and down, let the screaming go on but don’t lift up too high otherwise we’ll see the body is a dummy, keep screaming until they’re all into the stomach and then you die, got it?’ The zombies and actress nod back.
‘Camera rolling…ready…ACTION!’ Bob yells again. The growling starts instantly as the zombies sway and buck their way closer to the screaming woman. Paco keeps his terrified look for a few seconds, letting the zombies “eat” into the body.
Zombie one throws his head back dramatically and then lunges down to burrow his face into the skin of the dummies stomach which tears open easily as he pushes his hands in while thrashing his face side to side. He has done this before and is a well-known zombie actor, having worked on many films an
d television shows. He knows the exact amount of thrashing to be done and how to lift his elbows up high to make it look like he’s digging down into the torso. His face disappears into the flesh as he seeks the big lump he knows is a couple of inches down. The actress lets rip with an ear shattering screech, shaking her head violently while drumming her hands on the road. Zombie one comes up with an almost triumphant look, like bobbing for apples. He holds the meaty chunk in his mouth and uses his hands to smear the fresh wet goo over his face. Zombie two drops in, using his hands to scoop out the long entrails that look like a string of sausages. He hungrily shovels these into his mouth while thrashing his head about. Zombie three, on cue, moves to the right thigh and after gripping the meaty flesh between his gnarled hands he bites down and tears a chunk away, the pre-loaded section bursting blood and gore out onto his face, an arterial spray pumps thick bright red liquid out.
On cue, Paco replaces his terrified look with one of determined action and starts moving towards the woman. He begins slow, allowing the camera to keep the zoom on his face as he shows the smooth move from terror to action. He picks his speed up, taking care to pump his powerful arms and lift his manly thighs high while maintaining a determined look on his face.
He gains speed as the zombies all sink down onto the dummy stomach and pull entrails, organs and props out in a frenzy of eating. The actress screams, thrashes and gradually grows silent to lie twitching in her final death act. She finishes with eyes open which she regrets, fearing her eyes will water from having to stare without blinking.
Precisely at this point, while Paco is doing his action run, another zombie appears from the back of the street. The third camera man, in a state of panic thinking he’s missed a vital part of the script, pans in to film the late arrival. Everyone freezes. The make-up on this actor is brilliant; the fresh blood round his face, the torn clothing and the jerky staggering motion. The third camera man zooms in close on the red bloodshot eyes; giving thanks that he’s captured the actor and hoping no one noticed he missed the entrance.
The new zombie jerks and staggers towards the horde on the ground. Paco, seeing the new arrival and also panicking thinking he had never read the script, keeps running while holding his determined face. Was he meant to arrive after this new one? Before? Shit. He curses himself for not getting someone to read the script and tell him what was expected. Jenny! He would get Jenny to check it and tell him in between dropping to her knees.
Bob, on seeing the new zombie actor quickly raises his clipboard and starts flicking through the notes, frowning at where this had come from.
The head of make-up crosses her arms as a look of thunder spreads across her face. This wasn’t one of hers. So who had authorised this? Which union was he from? She wants to shout out but stops herself, knowing that nobody ever shouts out on a “hot-set”.
The new zombie staggers towards the horde on the ground. They’re unaware of the new arrival and are busy making noises, eating the innards of the dummy while smearing blood and howling into the sky.
Paco slows down and waits, sensing he should arrive just after the new zombie. He knows they will be able to edit the run so it looks seamless. For such an organised set there’s a whole pause as everyone checks notes and looks to each other.
The horde feels the arrival of the new zombie as he shoulders his way through them towards the body. Zombie one glances at the late comer, inwardly cursing at the new one looking even better than he does and he’s meant to be zombie one! His agent would be spoken to about this. The new zombie plunges its face into the dummies stomach and starts thrashing about. The howls turn to groans as it realises the flesh isn’t flesh. It had seen the feeding frenzy and jumped in, hoping to quench the urge to bite and feed. This wasn’t flesh. It was gunk. It turns slowly towards zombie one as Paco picks his running up again, starting the final sprint towards the horde.
Zombie one looks in horror as the new one lunges at him, pushing him to the floor and taking a chunk from his neck as Paco sprints past with a look of utter confusion on his face as he stares at the zombies. Are they meant to eat each other?
‘CUT!’ Bob yells, ‘What the hell is going on here, who is that? Why is he attacking zombie one?’
A cacophony of voices bursts out as the head of make-up turns on everyone near her and starts yelling for “who the hell did the new zombie? Camera men shout for copies of the script, demanding to know why they hadn’t been told about the new arrival. Paco eases his running and turns slowly to stand looking genuinely confused at the zombies still doing their feeding frenzy.
‘YOU!’ Bob shouts pointing his clipboard at the zombies on the ground, ‘WHO ARE YOU? You will never work on any of my sets again, do you hear! You will be blacklisted and out of this industry, you’ll be doing panto for the rest of your life buddy…Hey! Hey stop that now I am talking to you…’
Zombie one couldn’t scream. His windpipe had been ripped out and he lay choking on his own blood. The real zombie turns and attacks zombie two frozen in terror at the sight of the angry director charging at them. Zombie one dies. Zombie two is savaged. The director runs into the fray and, in a fit of utter rage, drags the real zombie away from zombie two while screaming abuse and threats. Crew run in from all sides as the new zombie thrashes in the directors grip.
Bob, not believing that anyone on set would ever defy him, whacks the clipboard round the head of the zombie as it lunges up and bites deep into his neck. Bob goes down with a gurgled cry and a spray of blood bursting into the air. People scream. Paco screams.
‘SECURITY,’ someone yells. The burly black clad figures standing chatting in the distance of the catering truck ditch their coffee’s and started running towards the noise.
Hands grab at the new zombie attacking Bob. Zombie two dies. Zombie one comes back to life as cast and crew look down at him. The poor actress, wedged into place and unable to move screams again and thrashes as zombie one surges up and bites into the face of one of the producers. The real zombie, gripped by hands and dragged from Bob, kicks and fights like the evil spawn he is. Biting and tearing flesh open. The deadly infection passes into the bloodstream of everyone cut and wounded.
Paco stands there rooted to the spot, screaming in terror. He ignores the look on Jenny’s face as she runs towards the bedlam, staring at him with a look of disgust. The situation develops quickly with zombie one biting at will, zombie two turning and coming back to undead life to join in with the savage attacks.
Bob the director, bleeding heavily and having been dragged away by several members of the cast slumps down into unconsciousness. Cast and crew scream in horror as he becomes unresponsive, one of the producers yelling for the on-set medics to get here now. They arrive, carrying large padded bags and looking good in tight fitting uniforms specially designed for the television and movie industry. The bags are opened revealing a plethora of equipment as the paramedics rummage through the kit with shaky hands, applying dressing to the gushing neck wound and bending over to shine small pen torches into Bob’s eyes.
‘HE’S GONE,’ the torch shining paramedic bellows very loudly, discarding the torch to tilt Bob’s head back. He checks the airway is clear and disregarded the breathing apparatus supplied with the kit bags, preferring to use mouth to mouth and knowing that he’d be able to sell his story for thousands later. The paramedic who gave the famous director mouth to mouth. Heroically struggling despite the violence erupting around him. Valiantly fighting to save his life despite the overwhelming odds. The paramedic knows, regardless of the outcome, that he is now set for life and can milk this for years. His mind racing with thoughts of the television interviews, shaking hands with politicians and being famous for giving live on screen demonstrations for first aid.
‘I NEED PADDLES…STAT!’ he yells far louder than he needs for his assistant is already rigging the defibrillator up, having set it to pre-charge.
‘COME ON BOB….BREATHE DAMN YOU…BREATHE FOR ME BOB,’ the paramedic thumps the dire
ctor’s chest dramatically and plunges back down to press his open mouth against the directors lips, exhaling heroically while glancing up to make sure everyone is watching him. They cheer as the director twitches to life and wraps his arms round the paramedic’s neck, pulling him in close. The paramedic feels a sudden searing pain as teeth clamp onto the soft tissue of his lips and tears them away with a savage shake. The paramedic reels back with blood pouring from his ruined mouth. More screams erupt as the director sits up, opens his red bloodshot eyes and lunges for the juicy calf muscle of the head of make-up standing there still holding her clip-board. She tries to jump back but Bob grips her ankle with his clawed hands and sinks his teeth in. The deadly saliva purging from his mouth, into the woman’s bloodstream. She jerks away and hobbles off wailing in alarm.
The panic makes her heart beat faster and sends the infection into every cell of her body. She drops down within fifty paces to lie twitching on the floor. One by one the cast and crew are taken down.
The set was a closed set. Secret filming of the new Paco Maguire blockbuster being carried out late at night. Not one person on the set had any idea of the devastation sweeping the outside world and here, as with everywhere else, saw them running in all directions. The natural instinct to run towards other human beings in trouble, lying on the ground bleeding and injured. Medical assistance was given, hands pressed into wounds to stem the bleeding. Phones, that had been strictly controlled and turned off, were activated as trembling fingers dialled the emergency services.
Paco stays rooted to the spot as the devastation explodes all around him. He screams in terror at the sight of the real blood and gore being torn from real bodies of the real people. He backs away on shaky legs, gibbering and whimpering with utter blind panic.
‘PACO! Help me…please help me…’ the unknown actress buried in the hole screams in panic, holding her hand out to the movie star. He stares back in horror, willing her to shut up and not draw attention to him. The undead hear her screams and start towards her. She sees them coming, screaming louder, knowing that the strong actor can easily pull her from her position and give her a chance of survival. He doesn’t. He backs away and watches in horror as they descend.