by Liz Long
“Do you blame him? Dr. Hardy, I mean?” I asked.
“Sometimes. I never met him; these are things I heard from her. I don’t know why it didn’t work if it’s worked on others like he said. Other days I blame her for being so willing to throw away her gift like that. We shouldn’t take it for granted. I have good and bad days, but fuck, I’d never not be gifted.”
I suddenly liked Brooklyn much more.
“So you guys knew my dad? I know he came back a couple times a year to work with Sheffield,” I said.
Nikolas nodded. “Keegan and I met him a couple times. We didn’t train or anything, though. He stayed with Sheffield, mostly.”
“He passed his talent on, though,” Keegan added with a motion in my direction. “I’ve never heard anyone talk about him throwing a heat wave.”
“He said he never had the patience for it,” I replied absentmindedly. My father always talked about how he trained other Firestarters when he visited with the show. Why would Nikolas and Keegan not know him personally if they’d been here for years?
“Lucy, another beer?” Finley asked me. I nodded and he handed me another.
“I guess you’re not the only new kid in town. Who was that guy earlier?” Bianca asked.
“What did Sheffield say his name was? Gary?” Delia asked.
“Gabriel,” Brooklyn answered. “He’s Rick’s nephew. He was here years ago, when we were tweens. I guess his family left when he was around fifteen or sixteen, but I have no idea why. We ran in different age groups so I didn’t know him.”
“Is he gifted?” Bianca asked. Somewhere along our conversation, Bianca had slipped her hand into Brooklyn’s. I’d never seen any two people look so comfortable with one another, except maybe my parents.
Brooklyn shrugged. “No idea. Rick’s always been a great worker, but he’s a very well built, muscular human. If Gabriel has a gift, it came from another family member.”
“If he is gifted, it doesn’t look like it’s a physical one. Nothing noticeable, anyways,” Finley commented.
“I guess we’ll find out. He didn’t look thrilled to be here when Sheffield announced him,” Bianca said.
“I’m thrilled to be here, but some people need to ease their way in,” I responded, defending both Gabriel and myself.
“You’re in a circus. You’re gonna get attention,” Brooklyn said matter-of-factly.
“What are your roles? Do any of you have an act?” I asked.
“Nik and Keegan do,” Finley and Bianca answered together. They shared a grin.
“Oh yeah? What do you do?” I looked at Nikolas.
“We ride the motorcycle ball.”
“I thought that was typically with two or three other people,” I said.
“Well, I light it on fire from the inside out,” Keegan answered.
“Your bikes don’t blow up?”
Nikolas chuckled. “We have talented mechanics.”
Keegan nodded. “Only we can’t really risk it with nonflammable people. The other guys, they don’t like the action so much. They like being with the clowns.”
Nikolas took a drink from his bottle but nodded with an eye roll in agreement.
“Brooklyn has a sideshow,” Bianca said, nudging her.
“It’s not an act in the Big Top. I hang out by the games booth, offer to read people’s minds. It’s simple stuff really—I ask them to think of a color, number, or animal and easily guess it back to them. Funny how people think I cheat. Even funnier when people think I’m for real.” Annoyance crept into her voice.
“Sorry to sound like a fool here, but I haven’t worked with Telepaths before. What do you mean, funnier? Wouldn’t that be a positive thing?” I asked.
She gave a wry smile. “Nope. Most either look weirded out and wander away, demand their money back because it’s cheating—”
“Or in that one kid’s case, follow you around for three hours asking how he too can be a Telepath and insisting she was wrong about everything he thought,” Bianca interrupted with a laugh. “She had that same sour face all day. It was great.”
“Was that the same kid who kept begging you for lottery numbers or something?” Fin asked.
“Nope, different one. Parents need to watch their fucking spawn!” Brooklyn said, rolling her eyes. “Whatever. I help with security, too. I roam up and down the benches and make sure no one’s up to any funny stuff—you know, thinking to sneak backstage, steal animals or try to sidewall into the show.”
“I’m in the animal act, but not alone,” Bianca piped up. “I’ve got Henry with another girl and her dogs, then there’s the horses, tigers, and elephants. I lead in with mine until the handlers get their animals lined up and ready. But outside of the act, you know, I help everyone out like magic acts or last minute props.”
“You already know I’m a Runner,” Delia said.
“And I shift to sub in for anyone that needs it, provided I can do the act. Otherwise, I help backstage and lift a lot of stuff with my guns,” Finley chimed in. He flexed an arm to show off his muscle and gave me an exaggerated wink.
“You should know as well as anyone though,” Nikolas said. “You know what it’s like being around the grounds. We have our own stuff going on, but we always help each other out. There’s no one person; we’re all a team with an end goal in mind.”
“To make some money!” Finley yelled. His voice echoed into the field and the rest of the group howled with him.
“What should I expect tomorrow?” I asked, after the last cry faded. The mood shifted.
“You definitely need to stay out of everyone’s way,” Nikolas said. “People are gonna run wild on the first day in a new city. The layout of the camp is different and we plan fresh acts. Give it a day or two for everyone to get into a groove again, then you can ask questions.”
“I hate to agree, but he is right,” Delia said. “Most of the artists feel rushed on day one; they will be impatient and feel a bit frantic. They will not want to answer questions. They will want things done within minutes of their asking.”
“What should I do when I get totally lost?” I asked.
“Ask us,” Bianca answered. “I usually have enough time between things where I can pop in and check up to make sure you’re okay. I don’t mind doing it.”
“I don’t want to be a bother to anyone though. I shouldn’t need a babysitter.”
“You’ll learn,” Bianca said. “But we’ve all been there and we all stuck by one another. Don’t wanna sound arrogant, but we’re the closest group in this place.”
Finley and Brooklyn nodded their agreement.
“Stick with the artists right now. Don’t mess with the animals and definitely don’t go near the workers,” Delia said.
“You should hang around with me and Nikolas when you get comfortable,” Keegan spoke up. “That way you can see exactly what your role will be later as a Firestarter. You can see what we do, how we help everyone out and how it might be different from what you did in the past.”
I remembered I needed to start training sessions and nodded. “Okay, that sounds reasonable.”
“You’ll be fine. Just don’t go setting anything on fire,” Bianca advised.
“Who do I look like, Pyro? I’ve got the emotions thing down!” I laughed.
The boys all froze.
“Did you…did you say Pyro?” Finley asked me.
I quirked an eyebrow. “Yes, I said Pyro. Like from X-Men?”
The girls all groaned.
“Oh my god, you’re totally in now,” Bianca said.
“What? What’d I say?”
“Dude, we live for X-Men,” Finley replied.
“I don’t understand the big deal with comic books,” Bianca said as she took a drag off her smoke.
“It’s not all comic books for me. I mean, I love Iron Man and others, but X-Men…I don’t see how you can’t like them. It’s like a better version of our own lives!” I said.
Nikolas was the firs
t to jump in. “She’s right. I mean, I basically am Pyro, you know, minus the bad guy thing. He can’t generate fire, but he can control it. He has a flamethrower; I have a lighter!”
“So did Pyro in the movies,” Finley added.
“Oh my god, please give me three more beers,” Brooklyn demanded.
The rest of the night consisted of the girls trying to ignore our enthusiastic discussion about comic books.
Chapter 5
My first day at the circus could only be described as a total blur. From the moment I woke up I heard chaos. I took the quickest shower of my life, pulled my hair back and put on jeans and a t-shirt. The morning started with breakfast at the cookhouse, a large white tent that held a buffet line inside with picnic tables outside under a shaded area. I concentrated on eating my cereal rather than stare at my coworkers. Knotted up as my stomach already was, I didn’t need to faint from lightheadedness. For the rest of the morning, I followed Delia around but forgot to ask questions when I became distracted by my surroundings.
I suppose I thought everything would look as I remembered from my childhood. Instead, the modern updates surprised me. The Big Top was filled with plastic molded seats like in an arena. Electronics were faster and nearly everyone had a prepay cell phone. When I thought about it, even our campers were larger than I remembered. When I commented on this to Delia, she merely shrugged.
“We do not necessarily live richer than other groups. Sheffield always has many people owing him favors, so we can afford to eat well and sleep in bigger campers. Very gifted circuses are well cared for; it is our only home for many of us. Either way, it is bound to be a little more advanced if you have not been here for a few years. The whole world has advanced in ten years, no?” she replied.
The general atmosphere had changed, too. Thanks to more machinery with better lighting that brought in bigger crowds, noise thundered throughout the grounds. Even the colors seemed brighter, as though my memories had faded over the years.
Right before lunchtime, Delia reminded me to grab my suit. I ran to Sasha’s camper and managed to find her amidst the performers who needed changes made to their costumes. Thankfully, no one seemed surprised that I’d been given a suit. I tried it on at Sasha’s command; she gave a curt nod of approval and whisked me out the door, still dressed in it, before I could take a good look.
Two more performers, a man and a woman, made their way to the camper as I left. They both nodded their approval as I clutched my street clothes to my chest.
“Looking good, Firestarter,” the woman said.
“Yeah, that suit looks good on a woman,” the man said with a wink.
I blushed and hurried back to my camper to put my things away. I stepped in, tossed my clothes on the bed and went to look in the full-length bathroom mirror that hung on the door.
“Wow,” I breathed.
The full-length suit clung to me as Sasha had adjusted it for my chest and hips. Long-sleeved so no outsider would see my skin on fire, the black fabric covered my shoulders; the back created a collar at the nape of my neck and sides of my throat. Sasha had taken the liberty of cutting out a circular pattern on the front so my collarbone showed. It also included flexible, flat black shoes that matched the thick black material. Quite the change from my normal uniform of jeans and tshirts, I thought I looked rather like a superhero.
I stepped outside my camper and walked to the middle of the pathway, away from anyone’s possessions. I caught my arms on fire and felt heat on my skin as usual but when I let the flames go, I looked at the suit: all in one piece like nothing happened. No wonder Sasha owned that job. I couldn’t believe she put this together in only a few hours.
I rushed back into the chaos to search for Delia. So many strange faces passed me and I wondered if I’d ever learn them all. I couldn’t let it get to me on my second day, though. I headed back to the meal area and Delia sat at one of the tables waiting for me. Her eyebrows shot into her hairline when she saw me.
“Wow, you look great!”
“Yeah?” I ran my hands self-consciously over my hips.
“Sasha did a great job as usual. Do you not like it?”
I sat down next to her, pretended not to notice some of the looks the guys gave me from nearby tables. “I do, but I’ve never worn anything quite like it. I’m not used to seeing my boobs up to my chin for one.”
Delia laughed. “Do not worry, you look fantastic. Plus, it is your uniform; it will be like your second skin before long.”
“Certainly snug enough for a second skin,” I mumbled.
She shook her head with another laugh. “Do not be upset. It suits you; you will have many admirers, I think! Oh, Sheffield gave me this on his way around the grounds.”
She handed me a small note. On the inside, Sheffield had written that he recommended I stay outside the Big Top tonight and help those prepping for their acts.
“So what does this mean again?”
“Only to stay out of the way, really, at least for now. You will not see any acts and for that I am sorry, but it is better to get you adjusted first. Help gather props or open the tent flaps for those who carry items. It is not hard, but it will be helpful to everyone, trust me. He wants to ease you back into our ways; it’s been a while, so it makes sense.”
I nodded and began to eat my sandwich. I could handle low pressure for a while. After we finished, we walked around so I could begin to get comfortable with the grounds. On the way to the Big Top, I accidentally bumped into a large, solid guy. I looked up to apologize to him but he stopped me before I could open my mouth.
“Hello, Lucy. Do you remember me?” the man asked me. I shook my head and he gave me a gentle smile. “I suppose not, it’s been a long time since I saw you last, at your dad’s funeral I guess. I’m Marty; your pop was one of my very good friends.”
“Oh, he talked about you a lot! I certainly remember your name. It’s very nice to meet you again. I’m sorry I don’t remember you from the funeral,” I said.
“Not at all; you were pretty preoccupied. You’re probably having quite a time as it is being back here now.”
He rocked on his heels, spit on the ground. His right cheek puffed up like a squirrel and I gathered he had chew in his mouth. Round with a potbelly, Marty was a bit overweight but still managed to look as though he maintained a lot of muscle. His nose was squashed into his round face and his thinning hair made him look older than I’d guess him to be. A foot taller than me, I didn’t doubt he could pick me up with one arm without missing a step.
“You’re an Unbreakable, right?” I asked him.
He nodded, spit again onto the dirt. “Yes, ma’am, I am. You need any heavy lifting, come and find me.”
“Thank you. I’m glad to know a face around here.”
“I’m always around, so holler if you need anything at all. I’m happy to help. I better get back to it,” he said. He clapped a hand on my shoulder and I felt organs rattle inside my body. “It’s good to see you back with us, girl.”
“Thanks, Marty.” I looked up at him and gave him a smile. He had lots of lines around his eyes but he sure looked sweet, like a big, muscular teddy bear. He patted my shoulder once more before wandering off to a tent. Several people greeted him on his path.
“He is so nice,” Delia said. “Everyone here loves him.”
“My dad always had nice things to say about him,” I agreed. “Now, can you show me where exactly I need to be tonight?”
We walked around more as I continued to meet people and gawk at performers who practiced their act beforehand. Beautiful girls stretched and bent backwards, prepared to do gymnastics and dancing with each other or their horses. Clowns ran around to find their props and makeup, or in some cases, their flasks, which I found quite amusing. The afternoon flew as we got closer to show time. An hour before the gates opened, Brooklyn and Bianca walked over to us.
“Hi ladies,” they called out.
“Have you seen Austin? He asked me to
grab his paint kit from his trailer. He needs it like ten minutes ago, he has to get ready for the kids who want their faces done,” Brooklyn said. She lifted up a battered toolbox smeared with colors.
“Sure, I can run this over to him; we passed him earlier. Meet you over at the Big Top in a couple minutes. He likes to talk,” Delia said, rolling her eyes. She took the paint kit and disappeared in an instant.
“Doing okay, First of May?” Bianca teased me. “That sure is a hot uniform on you.”
“Ha, thanks.” I resisted the urge to cross my arms over my chest. “There’s a lot going on, but I’ll get the hang of it.”
“No doubt, give it more than a few hours,” Bianca said. “Let’s head towards the tent.”
“We should go out tonight to celebrate,” Brooklyn said as we walked over.
“Good plan, we’ve had a pretty smooth day. I could drink a beer or four,” Bianca replied. “Lucy, will you remember to tell Dee?”
I nodded. “Who else would you invite?”
“It’s usually the same group from like last night. Anyone’s welcome to join, but we’re together a lot,” Brooklyn explained.
“Let’s tell Jade. I know she usually declines, but I still want to ask. Renata will probably join us,” Bianca mused.
“And what about that new guy? Think he’d want to go? ‘Course, I’d have to find him. I didn’t get a good look last night,” I asked.
“Oh, honey, don’t look too far. That’s Gabriel over there,” Bianca said, motioning across the grounds.
I looked over to see a good-looking—okay, no, a really hot guy maybe a few years older than me. Tall and lean, he wore jeans and a white t-shirt, covered in dirt and oil from machinery. His longish blonde hair was slicked back and taut muscle rippled underneath his shirt. He spoke with an older man and pointed to the machine in the games booth.
I caught myself staring and looked over to see Bianca and Brooklyn with their mouths slightly open. I would never tell Gabriel this, but he might be the prettiest person I’d ever seen in real life.