“Good thing I found my shoes. Now it’s my turn for secrets.” She paused and put the shoes back in the box. She looked around and must’ve decided that the few people in the store weren’t listening to her. She turned to me and squared her shoulders. Then she took a deep breath and dropped her eyes. “I have a massive crush on your Uncle.”
I laughed.
“I already knew that.”
She met my gaze with worried eyes.
“How?”
“I’ve watched you around him. You kinda swoon when he’s around.”
She leaned against me and groaned.
“Oh gosh, is it that obvious? Do I really swoon?”
She pulled her own shoes back on and waited for me to answer.
“Yeah, but maybe I’m the only one who notices. We could ask Dallas.”
“No, no, no, you can’t say anything about this to Dallas. He’d tease me to no end if he knew. He might even tell Grant. They are pretty tight.”
I followed her to the checkout counter and waited in a short line. “I think we can ask him without even mentioning Grant. Can you trust me?”
She eyed me for a second.
“Okay, but if you screw this up, I’m telling Dallas you’re planning your wedding.”
“Deal.”
She chattered on the way to the restaurant. It was so nice to have friends again, but my stomach twisted in worry. Was she just using me to get to Grant? And what was Dallas’s deal? Julia said he and Grant were pretty tight, so the fact that he hung with me had to be because of something Grant said. Sometimes navigating what’s real and what’s in my head was so freakin’ hard.
At that thought I nearly stopped walking. My dad had said the same thing to me once. Right after I found him sitting in the car in the garage. He said, “I don’t know the difference between what’s real and what’s in my head.” Was this part of the curse too?
We found Dallas already seated at Bubba Gump. He was easy to find since the restaurant was nearly empty.
Julia and I sat across from him. We made small talk while we ordered, and just after the salads arrived I made my move.
“Dallas, can you help me figure something out?”
“Of course.”
I leaned forward a little and dropped my voice.
“Julia has a crush on someone and she won’t tell me who unless I guess correctly on the first try. You know her better than I do, can you help?”
He took a bite of his salad, chewed, then swallowed. “That’s easy. Grant.”
I got ready to defend her, to say that it couldn’t possibly be Grant, but Julia interrupted.
“How did you know that?” she hissed.
“It’s completely obvious. You have this look in your eyes when he’s around and you swoon.”
She banged her head on the table and muttered things that neither I nor Dallas could hear.
“If it makes you feel any better, I don’t think he has a clue.”
She sat up. “Really?”
“Yes, and if you want to change that I’m sure Savannah and I can arrange it. He’s meddled enough in my love life, it’s time I meddled in his.”
Both Julia and I started talking at once.
“Don’t you dare say anything to Grant.”
“What do you mean he’s meddled in your love life?”
He ignored Julia and addressed me.
“He just seems to think he knows what’s good for me, but I’m considering ignoring his advice. Maybe if I can distract him with Julia, he won’t notice what I’m doing.” Then he winked and changed the subject.
I thought about asking him to elaborate, but I was afraid of what he’d say. It sounded as if he were involved with someone. I wasn’t sure I wanted to know about it, because then that would solidify my fears that Dallas wasn’t interested in me.
“Speaking of Grant, he told me that part of the reason you came up here to work was because you got suspended for the last two weeks of school.” Dallas grinned and I knew I wouldn’t get out of this one.
“No way,” Julia chirped. “What’d you do?”
“It’s a long story.”
Dallas smirked. “It’s always a long story with you. Spill.” He motioned with his fork for me to talk.
“You know how I told you about the boyfriend I had?”
“The one you only kissed when he made you laugh?”
“Yeah, that one.”
“Wait a second,” said Julia. “You only kissed him when he made you laugh?”
I sighed. “Yes. He was funny.”
She cocked her head. “That’s a little twisted.”
I was about to defend myself when Dallas spoke up. “Stop distracting her, I want to hear about what our little Savannah could’ve possibly done to get suspended from school. My bet is that Zane made some other girl laugh and she got in a girl fight.”
“Nah, that wouldn’t be Savannah’s style. She’d be more sneaky than that.”
I waited for them to stop arguing.
“You guys are never gonna guess.”
They both looked at me.
Julia took a bite of her fish and said, “Continue.”
“Zane was an insane practical joker and he always got enough people involved that he rarely got into trouble. But one morning he didn’t want to waste the whole day at school. He called me really early and asked me to meet him outside at six a.m. I went along with it, figuring whatever he had planned would be funny. But it was not. He’d found a dead skunk on the side of the road, shoveled it into a bag, and brought it to school with us.”
Julia crinkled her nose. “Ew.”
“‘Ew’ doesn’t even begin to describe it. I spent the entire ten minutes to school with my nose shoved into my bag, trying not to inhale the wretched stench. Once we got there I held the door for him while he shoved the skunk into an abandoned locker. We then went to get breakfast while we waited for the admin to call off school. But they didn’t. They just closed the English hall for the day.
“When we got to school Zane told anyone who would listen that it was him. Of course someone snitched and my name was dragged into it. We both got suspended.”
My stomach twisted. If we hadn’t gotten suspended, Candie never would’ve betrayed me, and I’d probably still be in Albert Lea trying to come up with more excuses for why I didn’t want to have sex with Zane. My hair would still be long, too.
“How many kisses did Zane get for that one?” asked Julia.
“None. The skunk did not make me laugh.”
“So what was the funniest thing he ever did?”
“The dirty devil day.”
Julia took another bite. “What’s that?”
Dallas didn’t say much during this exchange but I knew he was listening. Julia’s interest surprised me.
“The day we got back from spring break he managed to talk the entire junior class into ending every sentence with the phrase ‘you dirty devil.’ Which seemed silly, until I was sitting in my government class learning about the Supreme Court and my teacher asked someone how many justices sit on the bench and the kid said, ‘Nine, you dirty devil.’
“At first a couple of people were sent to the office, but after a while they realized they couldn’t suspend the entire junior class. I even managed to answer a question in Trig, ‘A sine wave, you dirty devil.’”
Dallas laughed but Julia didn’t. “So did he get laid for that one?”
I blushed and Dallas scowled.
“No, it wasn’t like that.”
“But he did get a kiss?”
I grinned. “Yeah, a lot.”
“Why?”
I squirmed a little. The conversation was going places I didn’t know how to approach. I liked the fact that I was growing closer to Dallas and Julia. But Candie and I didn’t talk about serious stuff. She never questioned my motives and I never questioned hers. Julia wasn’t like that. She wanted openness. This could be harder than I thought.
“You know my
dad died, right?”
She nodded.
“You don’t have to talk about it,” said Dallas.
“No, it’s okay. I was depressed. Zane made laugh. I needed it. We both got what we were looking for. I never had sex with him. Mostly it was just kissing.”
Julia smiled a wicked smile and I was certain I wouldn’t like what came out of her mouth.
“You hear that, Dallas? If you want Savannah to kiss you, all you gotta do is make her laugh.”
“Julia,” I warned.
Dallas didn’t miss a beat. “I’ll take care of Savannah in my own way. Let’s talk about what it’s going to take for you to ensnare Grant.”
The tension broke. Dallas and I teased Julia about her crush. Dallas came up with tons of ideas on how Julia could win Grant over, and each one was worse than the last. I laughed a lot, which felt good.
My cheeks hurt from smiling so much. It wasn’t just Dallas, Julia made me laugh nearly as much as he did. The empty hole in my chest was gone. Happiness. It’d been so long. I’d missed it.
Daddy, forgive me, but I want this. I’m sorry.
June 10
From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Hey Pumpkin,
You know what I miss most? Riding coasters with you. I hope that you can keep it up. I miss you so much. Sometimes I pretend like we are the dad and daughter getting on the ride instead of you being the one working it. Any time there is an empty seat, I’m sitting in it. I’m so sorry for everything I’ve put you through.
Ride on,
Dad
A WEEK LATER, JULIA JOINED me for lunch on my rock. It was becoming a usual occurrence. I rarely ate alone. Normally it was either her or Dallas. Sometimes I preferred her company to his. I knew where I stood with her; Dallas, on the other hand, was a mystery.
He took me out every night, but never made any moves, like he had that first night. Of course, I was too chicken to try anything on my own. Plus there was that cryptic comment about his love life he’d made at Bubba Gump’s. Though, if he was involved with someone else, he certainly didn’t spend much time with her.
Julia shifted next to me and held out her water bottle.
“My hands are wet can you open this for me?”
The water bottle was cold and slippery. It felt good, since today was over a hundred degrees. I’m sure my chocolate was all melted, even with the ice I kept in my lunchbox. I cracked open the seal and took a sip before handing it back to her.
“I talked to Dallas this morning about why he hasn’t kissed you yet.”
I spit out the water.
“You what?”
She rolled her eyes. My heart began to race. Now he’d avoid me. I could deal with friend Dallas, but I wasn’t sure I could deal with no Dallas. Between him and Julia, I didn’t have time to notice that my own crew never invited me out. Maybe I didn’t hear her right. Yeah, that had to be it. There was no way Julia would do that to me.
“Oh, come on. You know you want an answer to that one. For what it’s worth, I waited until he was giving me a very boring blow by blow of your date last night.”
My heart stilled.
“He tells you about them?”
“I told you. He’s totally smitten. He talks about you all the freakin’ time. If you weren’t my bestie I’d be completely annoyed. Anyway, do you want to know why?”
“I’m not sure.”
She took a spoonful of her yogurt. “Well, good, because he wouldn’t tell me. Said it was none of my business and ran off to Grant’s office. Which is weird because you and I both know that Dallas is an open book. He’s never told me to mind my own business before.”
“That is weird.”
My stomach tightened. I hated not knowing where I stood with him. It was okay to have him as a friend, but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t stare at the ceiling every night envisioning our first kiss.
I glanced at my watch. Damn, lunch went fast. I opened my little plastic container with the chocolate. Not totally melted, but gooey. I ate one and handed the box to Julia, who grinned as she ate the candy.
“You are definitely a friend with benefits.”
“Yeah, Dallas would say the same thing.” I laughed and took off for the Demon Drop so Angelica wouldn’t yell at me for being late.
Today was a Saturday, hotter than blazes and busy. We’d run a forty-five minute line all day. In short, it sucked. Two trains were awful. There was absolutely no downtime. The second you cleared one train you began loading the next. It was hardest on the loaders so they rotated every hour. After I rotated through both loaders Angelica put me in my favorite position, Fast Lane. Not only was it the slacker spot, but it was in the shade.
I looked over the line as it snaked back and forth in the queue. It reminded of the times, when a ride was new, that Dad and I would wait two to three hours for our turn. We had some of our best conversations in those lines. My heart ached a little.
Fast Lane was right next to the entrance loader. I stood by the gate and waited for the loader to come back. Paris. My favorite co-worker. He was funny and constantly telling me stupid jokes.
I leaned over the bar and high-fived the riders on the train as they left the station. Paris snatched my height stick and pointed at the track after the train passed.
“Hey look under there,” he said. I should have seen it coming.
“Under where?”
He grinned. “I made you say underwear.”
“Ha-ha.” I said and took the stick back from him.
I leaned the stick against the edge of the fence right next to the stairs. Technically, I was supposed to hang onto it but I could always snatch it back fast if I saw Grant coming. I stepped into the shade and filled up my water bottle; from there I could see the person standing at the entrance position. Angelica. She loved that position on busy days because she liked telling irritable people they couldn’t ride.
She stood there, arguing with a boy who had an ankle brace. I opened the chain next to the control booth because I knew in thirty seconds or so that boy was going to come storming past me. The Fast Lane was the quickest way out of the station. As the chain clinked back against the control booth, the boy turned around.
Spitter.
The ankle brace was new. He probably did something stupid. I shrank back and hoped he didn’t see me. If he was pissed he’d take it out on me, for sure.
He stomped straight for me. He’d spent so much time arguing with Angelica that the station had nearly cleared out.
His face twisted into an angry sneer. It was the exact same look he gave me when I spit in his face. I could hear him calling Angelica colorful names where every other word was the f-word. Just before heading down the stairs he stopped and grabbed my height stick.
Haunted Valley took their height sticks seriously. Without one, we would have to shut down the ride until the stick could be replaced.
Against my better judgment, I took a small step toward him.
“Corbin, can I please have that?”
He turned and growled at me.
Whoa.
I wondered what on earth he was thinking. He paused, then lifted up the stick and threw it straight at my head. I ducked and the stick crashed against the control booth. Deanna, who was working controls, jumped and let off the buttons. A train was halfway out of the station when it stopped abruptly.
“What the hell,” mouthed Deanna.
Corbin stormed off down the stairs and Deanna released the train to continue its climb. She motioned for me to come into the booth. Before I could open the door laughter erupted behind me.
I turned and saw the purple shirts. That’s what we called the coaster maintenance guys. They showed up once a day and did inspections.
“He almost got you.”
I nodded, my heart racing.
Deanna grinned like mad because she had a crush on all of them. She was still the only girl on my crew who was actually nice to m
e. Boy crazy though. She had a crush on everyone, including Dallas.
As soon as the train came back into the station, maintenance shut down the ride for an inspection and most people left the line, except for a few diehards who would wait for the ride to open back up.
Deanna flirted shamelessly with the poor guy who had to take care of things in the control booth. That was when Dallas showed up with his iPad. My poor butterflies. Fluttering like that when nothing was going to happen.
“Hey, brother,” Paris yelled. Dallas returned the greeting and then smiled at me. I opened my mouth to say something, but Paris was not to be deterred. “Hey, Dallas, I’ll bet you a drink tonight I can make you say blue.”
Dallas shrugged. “Okay, I’ll bite. You’re gonna lose.”
“What color is that cloud?” Paris pointed to a monstrous cloud in the sky.
“White,” Dallas replied, rolling his eyes.
“What about the bathing suit on the hot lifeguard over there?”
Dallas didn’t have to look, everybody knew the color of the lifeguard bathing suits, but he looked anyway.
“Purple.”
“See, I told you I could make you say purple.”
“Dude, you said blue, not purple.”
Paris howled with laughter.
“Told you I could make you say blue.”
Dallas grinned. “Good one. I’ll have to remember that.”
The maintenance guys came back to the fence to talk to Angelica. Paris pounced on them and Dallas walked over to me. He grabbed my hand and stood super close to me. Completely in my space. I could feel the heat radiating from his body. The butterflies fought to erupt from my stomach.
He leaned close. For a second I thought he was going to kiss me, but instead he put his lips against my ear and spoke in a low voice. “Don’t tell Paris, but I’ll not pay up tonight since I have a date with a hot chick who I imagine would look loads better in that purple bathing suit than the lifeguard.” He leaned a little closer so his entire body was pressed against mine. I tried not to hyperventilate. After two weeks of nothing but friendly stuff, he pulled this. What gives? He continued. “Though, I think I’d rather see you in a purple bikini.”
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