She shakes her head.
“Kitten,” I whisper. I lean down and brush a kiss to her neck, shamelessly breathing her in as I do.
Then she’s turning the knob. “You don’t want it enough.”
Chapter Six
Katherine
Somewhere between Demitri’s place and mine, I sober. The bourbon may have brought my emotions a little too close to the surface, but I don’t regret the strength it gave me to leave. I may have been slowly falling in love with the dominant side of him all these months, but I’m done letting him pretend to master a relationship that’s going nowhere. After today, I realize that my heart just can’t take it.
The cab pulls up to the entrance of my building. The relief I should feel is swallowed up when I see Derrick’s face. His crooked smile is directed at another resident passing through the front doors. He holds the door open as I approach him.
“Miss Harrison.”
“You have real nerve.”
His smile slips. “I’m sorry. I don’t understand—”
“Tipping my father off when I come home late? Really?”
He opens his mouth to speak but shuts it again before any words can slip out. The guilt on his face unmistakable. All this time I thought he was a harmless flirt. I never pegged him for a snitch.
“I hope whatever he’s paying you to keep tabs on me is enough to keep you afloat when I tell your boss that you’re sharing personal information about residents.”
He presses his lips together tightly. I move past him, satisfied I’ve landed my blow. Except I can hear him on my heels. I mash the elevator button and try to ignore his presence. Except he’s too close. I can hear him breathing a couple of feet away. I can feel the force of his stare on me.
Finally I meet it with a glare. “Can I help you?”
“You should think very carefully about the threats you’re making.” His voice is low.
I let out a laugh. “You’re kidding, right?”
“Your dad’s not the only one who might be interested to know about your comings and goings. That’s all I’m saying.”
My jaw feels like it might unhinge. “Are you actually threatening me?”
“Not at all. I’m just giving you some friendly advice, Miss Harrison. We’ve always been friendly, haven’t we?”
I’m two seconds from slapping the condescending look off his face when the elevator dings and the doors slide open. I step through and hit the button for my floor. I can’t get away from this conversation fast enough. Away from this slimeball my father’s entrusted to follow my every move. Somehow I’m not entirely surprised that he’s managed to plant a spy—a disloyal one at that—in my building.
Back in my apartment, I toss my coat and purse on the designer bench in the entryway. I love this apartment. I love most everything in it too. But in this moment, it hardly feels like home.
I go to my bedroom and undress, trying not to think about how naked and satisfied I could be right now if I hadn’t left Demitri’s the way I did. The thought of exploring more of his apartment, getting tangled in his sheets, and learning a little more about the man behind the cold exterior is both intoxicating and heartbreaking. Now I’ll never know.
I turn on the shower and step in when the spray turns warm. The water pelts me, creating an endless assault of heat and steam. Some of the tension begins to release from my muscles. In its place comes something worse, though. Sadness. Disappointment. Despair.
I’m twenty-two. I’m in love with a Dominant who doesn’t love me. My parents have no idea who I really am. Worse, they don’t seem to care. But they’ve raised me to eat from their palms in exchange for obedience. Obedience I’m not sure I can offer anymore. Not when I’m this restless. This unsure.
The sting of emotion starts in my throat, but the tears disappear in the shower’s stream. God, I’m such a mess.
When the water turns cold, I dry off and collapse into my bed. I check my phone, a little more heartbroken to see no new messages from Demitri. Fresh tears threaten just as the phone begins to vibrate with an incoming Facetime call. Charlotte.
I think about ignoring it, but right now, I need to hear my best friend’s voice.
“Hey, Charlotte.” I muster a smile that I hope seems genuine.
“Happy, happy birthday!” she sings through her phone. “I’m at an opening tonight, but I wanted to make sure I saw your gorgeous face before things got too hectic here.” The fact that she remembered my birthday—when my own parents had not—is too overwhelming. The tears finally spill over.
Charlotte’s sweet smile falls. “Kat? What’s wrong? Why are you crying?”
I take a couple more tissues off the bedside table and try to explain through the sobs I’m trying to swallow. “Everything is a mess right now. My parents forgot my birthday. Again.”
“What is wrong with them?” Charlotte huffs.
“I don’t know. I honestly thought that was why they had scheduled brunch for today. My mom didn’t even come, and my dad basically threatened to take away my apartment unless I stop going out at night. He’s imposing a strict curfew.”
“A curfew? But you’re twenty-two!”
“That doesn’t seem to matter to him. He’s got the doorman to my building watching me like a hawk.”
“God, I hate so much that I’m not there with you right now. I’ll see you soon, though. A couple more weeks.”
I nod sadly. “I know. I got your text.”
“Are you thinking of bringing anyone?”
I shake my head, biting my lower lip to keep from saying anything more.
“Kat.”
“What?”
She tilts her head. “I know that look.”
“What look?”
“You’re thinking about Demitri again. You get this look on your face every time. Something between dreamy and totally gutted.”
I laugh. “That’s…strangely accurate.” My mouth turns into a sad smile. “He’s just a dream of something I thought might be able to take me away from all this. My dad’s world. This life. You know how it goes.”
She nods. If anyone knows, she does. Except she found her prince. Somehow they found a life outside this rat race. They found love.
“Maybe you should see him,” she presses.
There’s so much she doesn’t know. The last update I gave her was that Demitri and I had exchanged a few texts, toying with the idea of meeting up. But once the lessons started, I never told her about them. She kept asking about him, so I kept talking about him. I just left out all the details. The thousand little moments that are weighing so heavily on me now.
Charlotte frowns when the room she’s in suddenly grows too loud to continue our conversation. “Listen, honey, I’ve got to go, but I promise to call you back later. Don’t let them ruin your day. I love you!”
“Love you, too.” I barely have time to say the words before our call is disconnected. Hearing her voice will probably be the highlight of my day, but somehow I feel lonelier now than I did before.
Chapter Seven
Demitri
I’m going to be here all night. I don’t even care, because there’s nothing waiting for me at my apartment. Not solace. Certainly not Katherine. Even though a few minutes with her in the space made me want to keep her there. For a lot longer than I had the right to ask for.
I should let her go. I did let her go. Something I should have done a long time ago, instead of stringing her along. I’ve been fooling myself too. I thought I had things under control, but the more time goes by without seeing her, the deeper her absence affects me. We’ve spent days apart before. Weeks even. Nothing I couldn’t handle, because I knew I’d see her again. Now I’m not sure.
I should have reached out to her by now. But the bastard in me keeps rationalizing that if she’s feeling half the devastation I am, the heartbreak will be enough to keep her away from Crave. Out of trouble.
I sift through the massive pile of paperwork on my desk, trying to stay focused on
the shit that really needs my attention. As I sort through the new membership requests and purchasing invoices, I grow more frustrated. Most of this should have been dealt with weeks ago. Obviously my priorities have shifted.
Ronan’s words echo in my mind. I have to get myself in check. Only, I have no idea how I’ll do it when I can’t stop thinking about the brunette across town.
A hard knock on my office door only detonates my anger. “What?”
“Demi.”
I recognize the seductive purr of her voice before she comes into view. It’s been three years since I laid eyes on Natasha Novak. I’m not sure I’m entirely prepared to see her now. Not when I’ve got kitten in my blood stream, monopolizing every thought and vision.
I narrow my eyes on my unexpected guest.
Natasha plumps her lips and rests her hand on her cocked hip. “Baby, you look stressed.”
Her tone is heavy like her perfume permeating the room. Just one small whiff sends all the painful memories rushing at me with full force.
“How the fuck did you get in here?”
“The delivery man let me in as he was leaving.” A sly smile curves her glossy red lips.
One glance over her, and I can imagine the delivery man drooling over the cleavage bursting from her tight black dress. She knows how to get exactly what she wants with her body. She was raised to master the oldest profession in the world. Once upon a time, I took pity on her for her upbringing, but now I know she only uses sex to manipulate people for her family’s gain.
“Then you can let yourself back out. I have nothing to say to you.”
“Now, now, is that any way to greet an old friend?” Undeterred, she circles my desk.
I take a step back, determined to keep as much space between us as possible. Natasha may be luscious in her own way, but she’s no less devious than her brother.
“Lennox wants to meet with you.” Facing me, she rests her ass on the edge of the desk, parting her knees slightly. An offering. An invitation.
“So what? You’re his messenger now? I figured that was beneath you.”
She doesn’t flinch at the insult. She knows she’s not beneath anyone. Even when she was beneath me, she was using me. Playing her games…
“I volunteered to come. I’ve missed you, Demi,” she murmurs softly.
Except I know she’s anything but soft and demure. I cringe at the nickname she gave me so many years ago. She extends her index finger, trailing it down the front of my chest, her lacquered nail ticking every button on my Oxford shirt.
“Don’t you remember how good it felt when we were together?”
“It’s easy to forget the forgettable, especially when there are plenty of better options.”
She purses her lips, her dark eyes seeming to study me a moment. “Then maybe I need to remind you.”
As if in slow motion, she drops to her knees. She places her hands on my thighs and slowly drags them up to my crotch, unzipping my pants.
I knock her hands away. I used to love making her kneel for me. Everything about her would drive me wild. But that was a history I would never repeat. Ever.
“Your charms don’t work on me anymore, Natasha. Now get out of my club. And tell your brother that my answer is no.”
She doesn’t move. “You and I both know Lennox isn’t going to accept that answer.”
“Other than a bullet between the eyes, I don’t owe him a goddamn thing.”
She frowns up at me. “He won’t stop until he gets what he wants, Demi. And you know how he gets his way. Think of Adriana.”
“Don’t you dare threaten my sister.” The words are a mere whisper, the quietest promise of destruction if anyone dares get near her again.
Her frown deepens. “She was my best friend, Demi. I don’t want to see her get hurt again. But if you don’t give Lennox what he wants—”
I grab her long auburn hair by the roots and tug her head back. She has the nerve to smile, her lips parting with a lusty sigh. I ignore it and loosen my grip ever so slightly, unwilling to allow her to turn my anger into anything akin to sexual satisfaction. I lean down and deliver my next words low and clear.
“Maybe he needs to be brought to his knees, Natasha. An eye for an eye and all.”
She stares up at me, her gaze cold and confident. “You wouldn’t hurt me. You’re still in love with me.”
“Wrong again.”
She searches my eyes, the evolution of her thoughts flitting across her expression before finally landing on something that has her pushing away from me. “You’re in love with someone else.”
I swallow hard and wince. “You’re being ridiculous.”
She gets to her feet with less grace. “No. I know that look. I know it because you loved me once. You can deny it all you want, but you loved me. I…” Her eyes glimmer with emotion. “I guess I thought there’d be another chance for us.”
I take long strides to the door and open it. The bass from the club downstairs is a little louder now. Maybe I should take some pity on the woman, but I can’t bring myself to. I don’t want her here. And I sure as hell don’t want her here at her brother’s bidding. I grip the edge of the door tightly, wishing I could break anything right now. Crumble something into dust.
Natasha follows my lead. She pauses close to me, too close, and pulls a business card out of the top of her dress. Holding it between two fingers, she offers it to me.
“Set up the meeting, Demi. Before you lose everything.”
Chapter Eight
Katherine
I hit mute on the rom-com I’m watching. After only a half hour in, I’m annoyed by their simple problems and bad jokes. I go to the window of my apartment and stare out into the night sky. DC is lit up for miles. Alive with possibility, but I’m locked here in my tower. Waiting for freedom. Waiting for my prince.
I couldn’t have explained why I’d held on to my virginity for so long before. But once I discovered Crave, I knew. Deep down, I desired something different than a sweet romance. Something darker. Something only a man like Demitri could give me. Domination.
But Demitri doesn’t want me. And I’m done playing his games.
That’s what I keep reminding myself when the doubts creep in. It’s only been a couple of days, but our text thread has been radio silent. He’s done with me. He’s probably relieved that I walked away. It’s easy for him. Crave is his second home. A place where no desire is too dark or daunting. A place that, according to him, he needed to keep me from.
Of course, I am too inexperienced and temperamental to risk bringing further into his sex den. The more I think of it, the angrier I am. He gets to satisfy his every need inside those walls. Meanwhile, I’m here, wishing he could be the one to satisfy mine.
I go to my bedroom closet. Fresh determination makes my movements jerky and fast. I hastily begin shoving away dresses that I’d tossed away when I was getting ready for our last lesson together. I was sure that night would be special. Different. Worth the wait.
I’m done waiting.
My focus lands on the red dress draped messily on a hanger. The dress I wore the night we first met. I honestly never thought I would have the need to wear it again. Because even if Demitri hasn’t taken me, I’ve always felt like I was his, inherently.
I hold the smooth fabric against my body and turn to examine my reflection in the full-length mirror on the wall. I could pick out a dozen things to hate about what I see staring back at me. My tired eyes, the sad line of my lips. The unflattering pajamas partially hidden by the sexy dress. But I know that once I clean myself up and slip into it, I’ll be someone else. Someone free to choose a Master who truly wants her.
I get past the security check, relieved when my pass lets me into the club I haven’t stepped into for months. A familiar energy skitters over me. Anticipation. Excitement. And, yes, an unmistakable urge to embrace the things about this place that are unlike any other—namely, a shameless appreciation for sex. The music creates a b
eat that seems to echo my heartbeat, never mind the throb I can already sense growing between my thighs. I check my coat and make my way to the dance floor.
I used to cling to the edges, watching from the periphery. Tonight is different. I’m not afraid anymore. I know what I want. What I need…
There are half a dozen scenes playing out on different stages around the main level. Deep red and slashes of colored light pass over the crowd. The lighting is dark and moody but bright enough that I can see the faces of others staring me down as I work my way onto the dance floor. Mostly men but some women too. Heat in their eyes. Hands sliding over their visible arousal. There’s no shame in that here.
The beat of the next song is fast and rhythmic, infecting me immediately. I close my eyes and sway to the sound. I let my hands roam over my curves, an invitation to be touched. Seconds later, I feel the invitation met. A small touch at my hip. Confident without being aggressive. I keep my eyes closed and pretend it’s him, even though I know it’s not.
I can tell immediately. He doesn’t smell like Demitri, doesn’t sound like him when he whispers in my ear.
“Do you want to play?”
I don’t answer right away. We dance and touch until my skin is covered with a fine sheen of sweat and I’ve decided to stop fighting the war in my mind. The battle over my heart. I’ve kept it locked away for too long. I need to move on.
It’s time to come out and play.
Chapter Nine
Demitri
I’m not in love with Katherine Harrison. She might be the most tempting woman I’ve ever entertained taking to bed, but that doesn’t mean I love her. Doesn’t mean watching her walk away from me carved a crater in my soul or anything. No. Natasha is being the same manipulative bitch she always was. She’s just trying to get under my skin.
Misadventures with a Master Page 4