by M. E. Nesser
As if reading my mind, Ian called me.
“Hey, counselor, miss me?”
“More than you know. Jack just left to hang out with friends, and I’m not going to lie—I’m freaking out about tomorrow.”
“It’s going to be great. I think Jack will see that I love you—and I plan on loving you for a long time. I had a feeling you were stressing. How about I stop by for a quickie?” he suggested with the sexiest laugh.
“I don’t think that’s a good idea—what if Jack comes home early? Can I have a rain check?” I asked sweetly.
“That’s a silly question, Katharine. I love you, and I’ll see you tomorrow.”
I spent the rest of the afternoon making Thanksgiving dinner. I didn’t know why anyone thought all this preparation was worth it: it would take about eight hours to prepare the meal, and about twenty minutes to consume it. I was excited about bringing our two families together, but this kind of food prep seemed a little extreme. I’d have to rethink my offer to make Thanksgiving dinner next year. Next year. God, it was good to be thinking about the future again.
I met my son at his favorite restaurant around eight o’clock. Dinner was great. Jack wanted to talk about Bryce a lot, and it felt good being able to talk about him without sobbing. We were able to share happy memories, which felt amazing. We also talked about how difficult things had been since he died. Jack told me that he had been seeing a therapist, and I was glad to hear it. “So when did you start seeing this Dr.Wells?” I asked him.
“Pretty much when school started. I felt really guilty leaving you, but I knew both you and dad were excited about me going to Yale and I wanted to make you proud. I just worried about you constantly, and I was so sad about dad dying. I figured I would try the whole counseling thing out, as long as she didn’t want me to take meds. I was sad, but I wasn’t depressed. She has been really great. I’m glad I found her.”
I was surprised he hadn’t told me about it sooner, but he said he hadn’t wanted to worry me since I was having such a hard time myself. I told him that I had stopped going to therapy at the end of the summer. He wanted to know if Ian was the reason. I had to be honest with him. “Ian was definitely a part of it. Honestly, I was tired of sitting in the therapist’s office crying every week. I didn’t feel like I was making any headway. Sleeping and eating were still a chore for me. She actually suggested medication, but I refused to consider it. I was hoping the sessions would make me feel better and give me coping strategies, but they didn’t. Therapy hadn’t made me feel better at all. It was exhausting and draining, and it made me very sad. No matter how much I loved your father, nothing I did could bring him back. It sucked, but those were the cards we were dealt. I actually stopped seeing the therapist a few months before I met Ian. Once I met Ian, I realized that being in a relationship was the best medicine ever.”
“I’ve missed talking to you mom. I have been afraid to upset you. It feels good to be able to talk to you openly again,” he confided to me. “And I’m looking forward to meeting Ian. If you think he’s a great guy, then he must be.”
“He is very special, and it is very important to me that you like him. But no matter how you feel about him, you need to be honest with me. Promise?”
“Of course. I may have kept the therapy thing from you, but I would never lie to you,” he reassured me.
I admitted to Jack that I was ready to move on. It was difficult to say the words out loud to him, but he needed to know how serious I was about Ian. I also told my son that I would never forget his father or stop loving him. He needed to hear that as well. I reminded Jack that I loved Bryce with every fiber of my being, and that if he hadn’t died, we would still be happily and lovingly together. I prayed that one day, he would find the kind of love his father and I had shared. We had been so blessed. It had been an incredible love story. But it was over, and I’d promised his dad that I would move on.
At this point, I did start to cry. My son could see how difficult this conversation was for me, but he had more questions, and I knew that I needed to answer each and every one of them. Jack wanted to know what I meant about promising Bryce I’d move on. I had never told Jack about our pact, or about the two-pimento signal we’d agreed on. He was an adult now, however, and I knew he could handle it. If he was interested in knowing more, then I had to be forthcoming with him.
Jack sat quietly through my story. When I finished, he reached over and took my hand in his. He thanked me for being honest—even though it was awkward to hear. He was floored by the two pimentos in the olive story and agreed with me that it was pretty freaky. I told him that I still had the olive in the freezer back at our apartment. He asked me if he could see it, and I told him I would be happy to show it to him, since I truly believed it was a sign from his dad.
“I can’t believe you guys made that kind of promise to one another,” he admitted after I had finished with every detail from the story.
“I know it sounds crazy, but it’s the truth. Your dad and I had something incredibly special. Our love was so strong that the thought of the other person living the rest of their life alone was excrutiating. It is incredible how selfless you can be when you love someone. And I loved your dad with all my heart. I always will Jackson. You need to remember that.”
The rest of the dinner was more upbeat. It felt like we had survived an intense therapy session and now felt free to move forward. We’d said what we needed to say, and I was glad that it was over. Now it was time to introduce the two men in my life to one another and see what happened.
30
I hadn’t expected my mom to fall in love so quickly after Dad died. The rational part of my brain understood that she was young and beautiful and shouldn’t have to spend the rest of her life alone. The other part of me resented another man in her life, no matter who he was. I’m glad we had the conversation last night, but I was still freaking out a little. I promised myself I would give this guy a chance. I had to. I loved my mom, and I didn’t want her to be sad anymore. She really did look better. It was so good to see her smile and laugh again. At one point she had looked so unhappy and so thin that I was scared she was going to die, too. If Ian was the one that made her want to keep on living, I had to give him the chance.
I had told my therapist that my mom was seeing another man. After she let me vent for a while, she told me that what I was feeling was normal, but she asked if I really thought Mom, a forty-six-year-old woman, should spend the rest of her life alone. I realized that wouldn’t bring my dad back; nothing would. I needed to be open-minded and supportive. So here it was. I was going to come face-to-face with this Ian guy. And, to make matters worse, his two daughters.
Thanksgiving morning arrived sooner than I had hoped. I woke up to the smell of food cooking and looked at the clock. It was nine in the morning—only three more hours until the big introduction. I was a mess. I went to the kitchen, gave Mom a kiss, and told her I was going for a run. I loved running through the city. There was always something going on no matter what time of the day or night it was. I was hoping that some exercise would clear my head.
I ran hard for over an hour and realized that I should get back to the apartment to help with the preparations. When I got back to our place, I grabbed a bottle of water out of the fridge and told mom that I was going to take a quick shower and then help her out. She gave me a big smile, but it seemed a little forced. I think she was nervous as well.
At noon, the doorman told us that the Jensen family had arrived. I told him to send them up. I told Mom that I would let them in, since she was in the middle of doing something messy with the turkey. When I opened the door, I couldn’t help but smile. This guy had some good-looking daughters. Holy crap. I hadn’t thought to ask how old his daughters were; I’d just assumed they were young and annoying. One of the girls had straight brown hair, was very thin, and was dressed rather conservatively in a black pantsuit. She may have been plainly dressed, but she looked like a model. The other girl h
ad wavy blond hair, the most piercing blue eyes I had ever seen, and an hourglass figure that was so sexy I think my mouth fell open. I couldn’t help but stare at her just a bit longer. She was dressed in a bright turquoise dress that made her eyes sparkle even more. After my moment of gawking had subsided, I reached out my hand and introduced myself to Ian and his daughters. Once the pleasantries had finished, I escorted them to the kitchen.
Ian walked over and kissed my mom on the cheek. As soon as my mom finished greeting Ian, she walked over to the adorable blonde and gave her a big hug. It was obvious that they had met before. She looked at the brunette next and shook her hand and told her it was nice to finally meet her. The girl gave her such a sweet smile that I knew my mom would reach out and hug her. And she did. The girl was receptive to my mom’s embrace, which made me feel good. OK, maybe this wouldn’t be so bad after all.
Ian had brought flowers and wine. My mom put the flowers in a vase, and I proceeded to open the wine. Once we all had a glass, we toasted to the holiday and began to nibble on appetizers. I learned that the conservative girl, Emily, was interning at my mom’s firm this summer and going to law school in the fall. She was actually really nice and seemed genuinely grateful for my mom’s help in securing the internship. The blue-eyed goddess was named Sara. She was a ball of energy. She was a sophomore at Fordham and didn’t know what she wanted to do yet. Her grades were good, but she told us she was focusing on enjoying the college experience before life got too serious. It sounded like she was partying a lot and was involved in a ton of fun social clubs. I liked her a lot. She kept all of us laughing.
I found out that Emily was dating a guy who was off to medical school in the fall. Her face softened when she spoke of him. They had been dating for almost two years. If he got into medical school in the same city, the plan was for them to live together. My mother told Emily that my dad had chosen Yale for graduate school so he could be with her. I was surprised that she mentioned my dad, but it wasn’t awkward at all. I watched Ian’s face, and he seemed totally cool when she talked about him. I was starting to like this guy.
Sara boasted about being single. She told us about dumping the video-playing boyfriend and said that she was having way too much fun to be saddled down in some “ho-hum relationship.” Her expressions were as cute as she was. We were in the same year at college, so we had a lot to talk about. The three of us monopolized the conversation the first hour, which seemed to please our parents considerably. This was going so much better than I ever thought possible. The only awkward thing was that I pretty attracted to Sara, and I wondered to myself, if it was obvious.
31
I couldn’t believe how gracious Katharine’s son was. He seemed genuinely interested in my daughters, which made me so happy. The way the three of them laughed and carried on made it seem like they had been friends forever. They had a lot of things in common and even teased each other from time to time. At one point, Katharine reached for my hand and gave me a wink. I knew what she was thinking. She was feeling as grateful as I was. Our kids liked each other.
Dinner was excellent. I wasn’t expecting Katharine to be such a good cook. Since we always went out to dinner, I assumed that her skills weren’t that strong in the kitchen. She proved me wrong. It was the most gourmet thanksgiving dinner I had ever had. I wondered what other talents she was hiding from me. I looked forward to finding out.
The five of us went through three bottles of wine, and the conversation and laughter continued through to dessert. There was no awkwardness, even when Sara mentioned Jack’s dad dying. She said that she felt sad for him, because she would be devastated if anything ever happened to me. He thanked her and said that, although it had been a really tough year, he and his mom were figuring out how to move on. After he said that, Jack looked at me and thanked me for being a part of his mom’s life. It was a sentimental and honest moment. I assured him that I wasn’t trying to take Bryce’s place, but I did want to be a part of Katharine’s life. Jack seemed at ease with this. He leaned over and shook my hand and then kissed his mom on the cheek. That was when I noticed that she was crying. It was a special moment. I felt very thankful.
Sara made sure the sappy exchange didn’t carry on indefinitely. She told everybody to snap out of it and help the amazing cook clean up the meal. We all worked together and cleaned up the kitchen in record time. Emily thanked the hostess profusely and excused herself to meet up with Martin’s family for a few hours. Sara and Jack had wandered into the living room, where it sounded like they were making plans. I asked them what was going on, and they told me they had decided to go to some horror flick that had opened the week before. It appeared that horror films were another common interest of theirs. The last matinee was at 5:30 p.m., so they were off to the movies.
The last thing I had expected was that the day would go so smoothly. Even more surprising was how well Sara and Jack got along. I couldn’t believe they were going to the movies together. It was a wonderfully unexpected turn of events—and it also meant that Katharine and I would have some time alone.
32
It was a spectacular Thanksgiving celebration, and before I knew it, Ian and I were alone. I was thrilled. I felt like a nervous teenager who suddenly had the house to herself with no parents lurking around. More importantly, I felt like we had something momentous to celebrate. Thanksgiving had been a huge success. We knew we would have about three hours alone before Jack and Sara returned from the movies, and we weren’t going to waste one minute.
“First one naked gets to decide the first position!” Ian yelled joyfully as he ran toward my bedroom. Fortunately, I had a dress on and was able to remove it while I was running. I was also able to unhook my bra and slip out of my panties before he was able to get his socks off. Naturally, I won. Of course, we would both win in the end, but I loved his playful attitude. When he finally got his socks off, I pushed him onto the bed so I could stare at his naked body.
“What shall I do with you?” I asked seductively.
“I’m at your mercy,” he conceded.
“Let’s see how much my little friend here wants me,” I said, staring as his growing appendage.
Since we had a fair amount of time, I decided to make him suffer. I started at the end of the bed first. I sucked his toes and massaged his feet. When I finally looked up, his eyes were closed, and he was getting huge. I crawled upward and massaged the inside of his thighs, careful not to touch him where he wanted me to. I needed to make him squirm for a bit. I skipped his midsection and found his nipples. I sucked on them until they grew hard, and he moaned, begging me to touch him somewhere else. I hushed him and continued my assault. I sucked on his neck and his ears. He started to grab for me, but I pushed his hands above his head. I ended my travels at his mouth. I sucked on his lips and found his tongue, kissing him with the same intensity I could feel pulsating between his legs. When his begging got pathetic and I knew I couldn’t take any more, I straddled his thighs.
“This is the position I choose, Mr. Jensen.”
I lowered my dripping midsection onto his hard, throbbing body. I was wet and tight, and I knew it had to feel as delicious for him as it did for me. Once I had him nestled inside of me, I started to ride him—up and down, up and down. He started to moan, and I stifled him with my mouth. As the tension built, our tempo increased. I loved riding him. The orgasms were so intense this way. I loved the way I could control my release so it coincided with his, and that is exactly what happened. We came together in a moment of indescribable satisfaction.
The connection felt even stronger this time. Maybe it was due to the fact that our kids genuinely liked each other. That had to be a big part of it. It could also have been the release we needed after worrying about this day. Either way, it was magical. I felt my orgasm throughout my entire body.
After I slid off his body and curled up in his arms, I fell sound asleep. Food, wine, and satisfying sex were all I needed to fully relax.
33
I didn’t want to wake Katharine, but I didn’t want the kids to find us in bed together, either. I snuck out of the bed as quietly as possible, went into the bathroom, and got dressed again. I went into the living room, lit the fire, and sat down to read.
Around eight o’clock, I heard the laughter in the foyer. Jack and Sara were debating what the scariest part of the movie had been; their camaraderie made me so happy. After they walked into the kitchen and grabbed some water bottles from the fridge, they noticed me sitting by the fire.
“Hey, Dad. What’s going on? Where’s Katharine?” Sara asked.
“She excused herself and went to bed about an hour ago. Thanksgiving knocked her out,” I explained to them.
“Mom was pretty nerved out about today. I hope she felt good about how it turned out,” Jack said.
“She was thrilled that you kids got along so well,” I offered.
“Your daughters are great, Ian. I’m glad you guys could spend the holiday with us. It was important that mom and I made a new memory. Last year sucked so bad.”
“It was our pleasure, Jack. Thank you again for allowing us to join you on this special day. I think I’m going to say good night to your mom and head home.”
“Sounds good. Sara and I are going to hang out for a little while, if that’s OK with you.”
“That’s fine. Have a good evening. Just call for the car when you’re ready to come home, Sara,” I reminded her.
“Will do. Later, gator!” Sara said as she kissed me.
I snuck into Katharine’s bedroom and couldn’t believe how peaceful she looked. I didn’t have the heart to wake her, so I found a notepad next to her bed and left her a note.