by Anna LaVerne
It is one of those moments where I don’t want to face reality. The weight of the water and the darkness of the night are my solace for what I have done and the monster I have become.
“Meri, you need to come out,” a booming voice echoes through the water from above just before a golden light shoots through the water surrounding me. Whoever is above me is either Triton or Poseidon. I hope it is Triton, maybe he will be a little more understanding of my actions. Either way, I am certain I will be punished, and I deserve it.
I blow bubbles into the water in exasperation. It is time I face the consequences of being what I am. Gradually, I go to the surface just enough for my eyes to emerge from the water, and I see Triton standing on the shore, waiting for me.
“Come on Meri, you’re not in trouble.”
I swim a little closer, “I killed them, and then I drank their blood.”
“They attacked you first, didn’t they?” he questions me.
“Yes, but I killed them and drank their blood,” I reiterate.
“‘Tis only your nature, child. Come out, let’s talk. I have a gown for you to wear.” Triton holds a white dress in the air for me to see.
I can’t hide in the waters of Atlantis forever. I swim to the shore, naturally shifting when the water becomes too shallow and walk the rest of the way to Triton. He hands me the dress, and I pull it over my head. I take a second to wring out the water in my blonde hair before acknowledging that Triton is watching me.
“You are beautiful like your mother, but deadly like your father.”
I glance away from Triton’s words in shame, “I don’t want to be like either of them.”
“That seems to be obvious to everyone, and because of that, you are not like either one of them. I think you are are more like me,” he observes.
“What do you mean?”
“You don’t want to kill, go to war, cause war, or use your body to control others. You want the best for Atlantis, and I want the best for the ocean. I think we could make a good team.”
“Maybe . . .” I can’t help second guessing everyone's motives.
“I will give you more time. You get through the next week and become the Key.”
“Do you know who the men I killed belong to?” I ask before he walks off and leaves me alone.
“Jewel, I believe. She may seem nice, but if anything, this is a stark reminder that people in Atlantis are not often who they seem.” Triton turns and leaves me on the shore behind the palace. I have a general idea where I am and begin to walk towards the kitchen door on the side of the building.
It is dark. The only light comes from some of the natural bioluminescence of Atlantis. Random plants shine pink. The side of the palace offers a soft blue glow. My eyes adjust to see better in the dark than most. When I near the kitchen door, light spills out, and I hear voices within. I lean on the wall outside and listen.
“Stop gossiping, we don’t know if it is the new pure who did it,” one old man chides.
“Oh, I am almost certain she did. Who else has an appetite for blood to the point they would kill their own kind to get it?” a woman asks.
“I heard it looked like she was ambushed. Everyone had weapons, and they found her dress ripped and on the floor,” he counters her argument.
I continue to lean against the wall. I need to go to my room, and this is how I get there. Last thing I want is for them to see me enter. The only thing I have is that I currently am not dressed like a pure, and my face is uncovered.
“I won’t judge her yet. If she was attacked and hungry, you can’t blame her for what she did,” the man tries to reason, and the woman only humphs in response.
Not delaying the inevitable any longer, I open the door and enter an almost empty kitchen. Only the two older people are there arguing. I refuse to look at them and march my way through the kitchen and into the palace. Once out of the kitchen, I lean back against the wall in the stairwell, breathing a sigh of relief. Part of me wants to stay and listen to what they have to say, but the other part of me knows I shouldn’t linger.
I walk as fast as I can without running to my room, encountering no one else along the way. My heart continues to beat with adrenaline, knowing what I have done. I open my door and rush inside, slamming it behind me. My eyes are closed in relief for having made it to the safety of my room without any more murderous instances.
“Welcome back.”
I open my eyes to see Ari standing in my room hands on her hips with an accusing glare.
“What do you want?” I snap at her.
“Was told to wait here until you return then to bring you to Amphitrite’s rooms.”
“What if I don’t want to go?” I counter.
“I don’t think you have a choice. You can either come willingly now, or she will send someone more powerful than you to get you,” Ari explains.
“More powerful?” I scoff, “Who? Triton? My mother? They are probably too busy to do Amphitrite’s errands”
“Do you really want to test her? I doubt they would be too busy in this case.”
“I’ve already spoken to Triton isn’t that enough?”
“Please don’t make this harder than it has to be, Meri.” Ari looks tired, her skin whiter than usual, and her eyes are sunken into her cheeks.
“Fine, lead the way,” I am tired, myself, and want to get tonight over with.
I follow Ari down the hall, disinterested where we are going. I haven’t even put shoes back on since my shift. My mind and body have reached an odd level of apathy. I’m aware that what I did was wrong. I am aware that I will most likely be punished for it, but I don’t really care. All I want to do is get at least one night of sleep before I have to face whatever fate the gods deem fit.
We reach amphitrite’s tower quickly and begin to climb up the spiral staircase decorated with large shells and a painting of what I assume to be Aphrodite’s birth. Amphitrite’s first child, who also happens to be my mother.
Ari knocks on a door which is opened by none other than my mother. I sigh expecting an instant scolding, but instead she runs to me, pulling me into her arms and hugging me tight. Not knowing what to do, I return her hug and then in a moment of weakness, lose composure, bursting into tears.
She leads me into the room and sits me down on a sofa, continuing to hold me tight while I cry, “This is my fault, I should have taught you who you are and what you may be. I was so caught up in keeping you from Ares, I didn’t think of what it would be like to transform as quickly as you have. I fed you to the wolves, and you ate them.” Aphrodite stifles a laugh at her play on words.
I pull away from her, wiping the tears from my eyes, “I’m not to be punished?”
“Oh no, dear, they attacked you, and you responded on instinct and were hungry. No one with any sense, can fault you of that,” Amphitrite speaks from her chair across the room .
“I killed them.”
“That you did, but they should have known better than to attack. Did they say anything first?” Mother probed.
“Only that I am the only pure in the running to be the Key, and their choice doesn’t stand a chance, if I am in it. They don’t realize I am not pure.”
“Good, so it wasn’t Ares,” Aphrodite comments.
“Aphrodite, stop that nonsense. Ares doesn’t want to kill Meri, he wants to take her under his wing,” Amphitrite chides her.
“You can never know what Ares is capable of,” my mother argues.
“He is a lot like you, daughter. We all know of your manipulation skills. Meri is right not to trust anyone, even you,” Amphitrite says accusingly.
“I really don’t want to discuss politics right now. I am sorry, but I killed four men and drank their blood. I did a half shift and lost my mind. I didn’t even know a half shift was possible. I killed four men . . .,” I repeat.
“Once again, it was defense. Second, you can half shift because you are a goddess, so I am guessing it is one of your gifts. You need blood
to survive when using your gifts, so what else would you have done other than drink it?” Aphrodite tries reassuring me in her curt way.
“Will the other potentials know who and what I am?” I ask.
“Only one who might suspect is Jewel, but she can’t say anything, since it was her men she sent to attack you. So, I believe you are safe. Otherwise, it will be a story of them attacking a potential and dying as a consequence. Anything other than that will be pure rumor. We just wanted to see if you were okay,” Amphitrite explains.
“I am as good as can be expected, I suppose.” I surprise myself that as time moves farther from the event, how much more okay I feel about killing four men. They did try to kill me first.
“Alright then, Ari, please take Meri back to her room. Keep a steady supply of blood available to her. She needs more than most, and we don’t want a repeat, if she is attacked again,” Amphitrite orders.
I say goodnight to Aphrodite and Amphitrite before following Ari down the hall and to my bed.
12
I awake feeling more refreshed than ever before. Considering the daunting night I had, it is a bit surprising. My full stomach reminds me of what I had done and the amount of blood I consumed. To take my focus off of everything, I shower and dress to meet with Morgan and Aden.
I now have a closet full of black leather warrior garb. I put on a pair of pants with a leather bandage top. I strap my throwing knives to my waist and clean my dagger from the night before, then push it into my hip holster. I place two scabbards across my back and put my high-quality swords in it. To top off the look, I braid my long blonde hair and leave it to drape over my shoulder. I choose a purple scarf to cover my face, but am not sure it is worth it. No pures wear clothing like this.
I am almost out the door when I notice a glass of fresh blood. I drink it down, knowing it is from Ari and that I need it to keep my blood lust in check in the event I am attacked again. After I wipe my mouth on a napkin, I leave the room, allowing the door to slam behind me.
Most girls would be afraid of being attacked again, another reminder that I am not ‘most girls’. I rush downstairs and through the kitchen not waiting to see if anyone even gives me a second look. Once out the door, the brightness of Atlantis’ artificial rays assaults my eyes. Temporarily blinded by the light, I did not notice Laki and Breck standing with Morgan and Aden.
Shielding my eyes until they have a moment to adjust, I finally see Laki and Breck standing behind Morgan and Aden. The team has been chosen. It feels right, they know and trust each other, something important for any kind of team.
“Come on,” I usher them through the busy kitchen. Each man is so big they dwarf the rest of the kitchen staff, even Laki who is considerably shorter than the other three. I hurry them up the stairs and into my hall. When we enter the library, I hear an audible sigh come from Aden. He has stopped at the door and is looking at all the books in awe. I can see in his eyes that this is a dream library for a landborn merman, maybe someday he will have time to indulge in it. Today isn’t that day.
I take them up the way Ari took me only days before. When I open the hatch and bring them into the secret tower top garden, they are all silent. Whales are currently swimming above us. Breck, who is the tallest, reaches his finger into the air trying to touch the barrier. It is barely out of his reach.
“Seeing Atlantis from up here is out of this world,” Breck observes with a breathless tone.
“I know, it is amazing, but we need to get to work,” I say, pulling their attention back to me.
“First, we have a question,” Morgan takes the lead. “We want to know if you were the one who killed the four potentials last night.”
Will the questions ever end? I remove the scarf from my face, so they can see the real me, “Yes, but they attacked me first. I was hungry and frightened. I shifted and lost control.”
I’m sure to stare each man in the face, showing them that although I hate what I did, I take responsibility for it. There is no way I am going to lie to these men who have chosen to follow me.
“You shifted? A full shift?” Aden questions.
“No, only my fangs, nails, and some scales. I still had my legs.”
“Fascinating,” Aden is looking at me like I’m some undiscovered specimen.
“Do you need to feed more than most?” Laki asks thoughtfully, surprising me because he seems more of the jokester.
“Yes, I have been told I do,” I reply, looking at my feet.
“Well, thankfully, you have us now. We will give you any extra you may need,” Laki responds while placing his hand on my shoulder.
“What do you mean?” Confused, I look at all four men who seem to be in agreement with Laki.
“You can take from us. We volunteer, although I hear it comes with some racey side effects.” Laki winks at me, and Aden shoves him.
“We will talk about it later. I need to help you guys get on the same page battle wise, or you may not make it through the last round for choosing.”
“Oh, we will make it,” Laki says with confidence.
“Prove it.” I pull my sword free and take my fighting stance.
Laki takes his sword out, which is easily twice the size of mine. He is holding it two handed and begins to circle me. On his first attack, I knock him down with my sword at his throat.
“I don’t care how ready you think you are, you will not be able to beat me. In fact for training, I want you all to practice fighting together as a single unit. No one is seperated. No one goes out on their own. Your greatest chance will be fighting as one cohesive unit.”
“I’m in. I want this, but who and what are you?” Laki asks.
There is no use hiding it any longer, the rumors are bound to break free from the palace before I step foot in the Ring. “I am Meri, mermaid daughter of Aphrodite and Ares, granddaughter of Amphitrite.”
I attempt to keep their gaze, but the power in me wanes, and I look down at my feet. Before I know, it Aden is on his knees before me and takes hold of my hand. I peer down upon his golden hair and perfect eyes hidden behind his glasses.
“I chose to be loyal to you before we knew you were a goddess. Who your parentage is, is no matter to me. It is not something you have to embrace or be ashamed of. They are such a tiny portion of who you are. Remember that. Remember only you can choose who and what you are. You are Meri, not Aphrodite, and not Ares.”
I will never know how Aden knew exactly what I needed to hear. It is a reminder I don’t think I can ever forget. I am not my parents. I’m only a product of their joining. It is in me to use my abilities, determination, and fortitude for the good, but first, I have to keep these men alive.
I go back to training them with renewed focus. It is not only good for them, it is good for me, too. I have them attacking me as one unit, and each time, they managed to get a little closer to me, until finally, Breck lands a hit to my cheek. Pride cracks through me at the welcomed feeling of pain. These men are the best I have ever fought with, and I am blessed we were drawn to each other from the start.
“Change of tactics, I will attack all of you, and you need to watch each other’s backs.”
All four men groan in exhaustion. Their muscles glisten with sweat, each one looking like a god all on their own. I never knew attraction like what I feel for these four. I have never known need, but with each movement of battle, there is an ache within my core that continues to grow.
I attack, and they do well, but not good enough. “You have to do better,” I chastise them.
“I think we need to remind you that we are only mermen, we do not have your stamina,” Morgan replies, and I realize how hard I have worked them.
“Take a break and come back after lunch?” I ask.
“We worked through lunch. It is nearing dinner bell,” Aden explains.
“Oh, wow, sorry.” Embarrassment washes through me. “Tomorrow, we won’t work as long, promise.”
“Tomorrow, you go through purificati
on for the final Ring battle.” Morgan looks sad.
“And the day after that, you go into the Ring,” Laki finishes for him.
“What is the purification? And I’m not worried about the Ring,” I say flippantly.
Morgan shrugs, “I’m not sure what goes on in purification, but I would be careful in the Ring . We already know they are willing to use nefarious means to stop you.”
“I will deal with it then. I guess you need to head to dinner . . ..” I don’t want them to leave me. They are my friends, and I have never had friends. I didn’t have time for them before now.
We exit through the library, and when we get to my room, I have to ask, “Aden, do you think you can stay with me a bit?”
The fear of being alone is intensifying. It is unlikely many people can harm me, but the idea of being alone again after meeting all of them is terrifying.
All four men pause and give me a look of longing. Aden looks to them for support, and finally, Laki is the one who gives it. He gives Aden a shove in my direction.
“We will be watching for you, Meri.” Laki winks, and the other three echo his sentiment before walking away, presumably to dinner.
13
I lead Aden into my room where I find a note from Ari sitting on my nightstand.
Pull the bell when you return for a meal and drink.
I look to the thick yellow cord next to my bed. I hadn’t realized it was a bell to summon people. Without hesitating, I pull it and then start pulling my weapons free and laying them out on my bed for cleaning. It is a nightly ritual after everytime I train.
I sense Aden’s eyes observing my every move, and I let him. Not sure of what to say, I continue with my routine, and he continues watching silently. Awkward turns to peaceful, Aden’s presence in the room calms my troubled seas. I have had so much going on in my life, I can’t even trust the woman who raised me anymore. But everything about Aden, Morgan, Laki, and Breck feels sincere.