by Reiser, Paul
Having been there myself, I knew how vulnerable they were. I could make ’em or break ’em. I turned to my wife.
“What do you think, honey?”
“About what?”
“These nice people are thinking about having a baby.”
“Oh,” she said. “Good for you guys.”
Then turning back to me, she said, “Well, that’s a darn good question. What do you think we should tell them?”
We looked at each other and smiled. What should we tell them? Should we tell them it’s the hardest and scariest thing any sane people could ever do? Do we let them know that having a child drains you, depletes you, exhausts you, and frustrates you until you end up hiding in your car whimpering like a puppy?
How can you explain that having a child drives you as far apart as you’ve ever been, yet it draws you together more deeply and magically than ever before—all at the same time?
That after you’ve both spent an aggravating, mind-numbing hour-and-a-half rocking, walking, patting, begging your child to sleep, there’s nothing you’d rather do than spend the next hour and a half together, watching this angel sleep.
How can you explain that in the midst of a cranky discussion over who’s not “being supportive” of whom, you notice how adorably and hilariously your child is eating a bowl of spaghetti, and suddenly all the things you fret about just don’t matter?
You can’t.
I turned to the couple and said, “Yeah, it’s good. You’ll see.”
They nodded and drifted into their own conversation.
I held my boy’s face in my hands and planted a juicy kiss on his cheek. I leaned over and kissed my wife, too.
“What did we do before we had this boy?” I asked.
“That . . . ,” she said, smiling at the other couple.
I couldn’t believe how a handful of months could obliterate everything that had come before.
“But now we’re this,” she said.
Our son sat in his mother’s lap, one hand wrapped around her fingers, one hand on my nose.
“You know what?” I said. “I like this better.”
Acknowledgments
A huge thank you to my friend Brad “Zippy” Kesden, whose smart, funny brains and invaluable input helped me make this book a lot better than I was planning to.
Also to my Assistant with a Capital “A,” Meredith Kadlec, for making sure I never accidentally deleted the whole thing.
Big thanks to Arthur “Don’t Worry, You Can Take as Long as You Want” Spivak.
And to the incomparable Rob “But I Need It Now” Weisbach for his unwavering confidence and support.
Thanks to Michael James for keeping those sandwiches coming.
Thanks also to Marc Jaffe.
And, of course, Paula and the Prince.
About the Author
A seasoned actor, writer, and stand-up comedian, PAUL REISER has appeared in many films and television shows, including cocreating and starring in the critically acclaimed NBC series Mad About You. He is the author of the New York Times bestsellers Couplehood, Babyhood, and most recently Familyhood. He lives in Los Angeles with his wife and two kids.
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Other Works
Also by Paul Reiser
Familyhood
Couplehood
Credits
COVER DESIGN BY FEEZA MUMTAZ
Copyright
A hardcover edition of this book was published in 1997 by Rob Weisbach Books, an imprint of William Morrow and Company, Inc.
BABYHOOD Copyright © 1997 by Paul Reiser. All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the nonexclusive, nontransferable right to access and read the text of this ebook on-screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, downloaded, decompiled, reverse-engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins ebooks.
First Avon Books paperback published 1998.
First It Books paperback 2012.
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is available upon request.
ISBN 978-0-06-209877-1
Epub Edition © MAY 2012 ISBN: 978-0-06-209878-8
12 13 14 15 16 DIX/RRD 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
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