“Babe, what’s wrong?” Kiran reaches out. His concern for me is clearly written on his face.
I sniffle before taking a deep breath. “Damian is gone.” I tell him something he already knows. “I mean, he’s not coming back for me.” I hold up my passport. “This was his way of telling me.”
Kiran’s eyes narrow as he looks at my passport. “It’s not safe for you to be with him, Isabelle. You have to know that.” He spoke slowly, trying his best to take the sting out of his words.
“Like it or not, Kiran, he’s my father. I love him and I will love him until the day I die,” I admit as he steps closer and pulls me into his body. Kiran wraps me tight against his chest, which ends up being exactly what I need.
After a few minutes, we walk over to the bed and lay down, facing each other. Kiran slowly reaches his hand out and places it on my belly without taking his eyes off me. He smiles then gasps as the baby kicks.
“Holy shit,” he whispers, looking down at his hand. “My kid is already strong.” I can hear the pride in his voice as he smiles in awe. I laugh at how fascinated he now seems to be with my stomach.
Kiran glances at me. We watch each other until he reaches out and softly brushes his hand down the side of my face. He’s looking at me the same way he did before I left.
“Just because I’m pregnant...it doesn’t mean anything has to happen between us. We can be friends.”
Kiran’s eyes darken. “Is that what you want?”
I shrug. I would love nothing more than to have a future with Kiran, but I can’t pressure him into being with me.
“It’s not what I want. I mean...I want us to be friends, but I want more, too. When you left...it devastated me. Now that you’re back, I want to do everything in my power to keep you. The fact that you’re pregnant with my kid is just an added bonus.” He squeezes my hand before delivering a gorgeous smile.
“We didn’t really get to know each other before, and with a child on the way, I think we should know each other better before we make any more promises.”
If I had my wish, Kiran and I would get married, have a litter of children, and live happily ever after, but wishes—at least in my world—rarely come true.
Instead of saying another word, Kiran places his hand on my waist and pulls me closer. Before long, I fall asleep.
****
“Your momma loved it out here.” Mary, my grandmother, says as she steps up next to me.
I’m out on their porch swing, enjoying the spring breeze. I’ve been here a few days now, and every time I step outside, the view takes my breath away. “It’s gorgeous out here. I’m sure anyone would love being raised here.”
“Nah,” she says with sadness. “Your aunt couldn’t get out of here fast enough, even if that meant taking up with the wrong people.” My breath catches. She’s talking about my father. My Aunt Stacy somehow ended up with Damian, and he’s the reason this family has experienced an extreme amount of pain.
“I’m sorry for the way life turned out.” I take a deep breath. “But I want you to know he loves me. He might be a monster in your eyes and he might do horrible things, but under all of that is a man who loves me...a man who didn’t stop loving me when he found out I wasn’t his.” Our eyes tangle and it’s clear she doesn’t share my opinion of Damian, and truthfully, I can’t expect her to. If I were walking in her shoes, his actions would be unforgivable.
“Are you and that boy going to get married?” she questions, causing my heart to sink.
Before I can answer her, Kiran walks out. “Hopefully one day,” he says to Mary with a grin on his face as Alex follows him out the door.
“Isabelle, we need to talk to you.” Alex’s tone puts me on alert.
“What?” I ask as Kiran’s smile fades. They share a look before Kiran speaks up. “The Mexican authorities have announced they’ve recovered Damian’s body along with two other men.” My stomach violently turns as I run inside and into the bathroom where I stop in front of the toilet.
Kiran opens the door and steps behind me. He pulls my hair back with one hand and rubs my back up and down with his other. “Are you okay?” I shake my head no. I didn’t get sick, but that doesn’t mean I’m okay.
When the acid in my stomach settles, I stand up and rinse my mouth before glancing at Kiran.
“He’s faking. This is a setup. He wants Miguel to think he was dead. This is just a setup.” My voice is frantic as my concern for my father takes over.
“With Damian, anything is possible,” Kiran says before sighing. “But for the authorities to claim they have a body ...” He doesn’t finish his comment. The government doesn’t run the same in Mexico as it does here in the States, but it’s hard to believe they’d flat out lie, especially for a known cartel member. But this is Damian we’re talking about. The three of them have been working on a plan, a plan I know nothing about.
“I want to go back to Denver,” I say, surprising even myself. I overheard Alex and Kiran talking last night. Gavin reported that no one is following Kate and their house is clean of any bugs.
“I don’t think that’s a good idea. That Ramos boy could be watching and waiting for you.” Kiran’s voice is laced with concern.
I don’t know Manuel nearly as well as I thought I did, but if money and power mean that much to him, then I’m positive he’s not holding out for me any longer, not if he believes Damian is dead. I think he only wanted me by his side to exact his revenge on Damian. And what better way to do that than take his empire and his daughter?
“Kiran, it’s been twenty-seven weeks since we had sex. That means I have around thirteen weeks until this baby should arrive. I like my grandparents but I don’t want to have a baby on a farm. I want a place where I can put up a crib and start building a life. Seeing as you, Alex, and Kate live in Denver, it makes sense for me to move there.”
Kiran takes a deep breath before exhaling slowly. “What if Manuel finds you?” he questions as he studies my features closely.
“If Manuel still wants me—and I’m not positive that’s the case—then he’s going to find me. He’s in a position of power now and with that power, information comes easily. If he researches my biological past, he’ll find this farm. Anywhere I go, I’m a sitting duck, but at least in Denver, we can start preparing for this baby.”
“She’s right,” Alex says from the doorway. “We have an alarm on our apartment, and we can take turns staying with her. Right now, we’ve left Gavin high and dry at work,” Alex adds, reminding me of another problem I’ve caused.
“Okay,” Kiran unhappily says. “But under no circumstances are you to be left alone, and whatever happens from here on out, you do not run off again.” Kiran’s nostrils flare and his face looks angry.
“Okay,” I quickly agree.
“I mean it, Isabelle. I don’t care if someone has threatened to kill everyone you know, you tell me what’s going on and we’ll figure it out together.” His voice and posture are stern.
I nod my head. “I promise. I won’t take off.” If Manuel threatens me again, leaving isn’t the same option it once was. I have my son to think about now, and I refuse to do anything that could harm him.
“Then it’s set,” Alex says. “We’ll head back to Denver. I’ll call Gavin now and have him head over to our place and check things out. Make sure no one has been there.”
As Alex starts to walk away, I reach out and grab his arm. He glances down at my hand before looking me in the eyes. “I never imagined having a brother but I’m lucky to have you.” His eyes widen in surprise. “Thank you for loving me sight unseen,” I add. Because God knows I didn’t instantly love him the second I found out he existed. Now, however, after only seeing him a handful of times, I know there isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for him.
Alex’s face softens. “The day I met you, twenty-one years of unanswered wishes finally came true.” His words turn around one of the worst moments in my life and actually causes me to smile. If I have t
o lose Damian, I couldn’t have replaced him with a better person to call family than Alex.
With another small smile, he turns to Kiran and nods before leaving us alone. Kiran reaches out for my hand. “We live in a two-bedroom apartment. Are you okay sleeping in my room until we find something bigger?” I’m still unsure where Kiran’s head is. He appears to want this baby, but I’m still worried he only wants me because he thinks we’re a packaged deal.
“As long as you’re really okay with that.” I look him in the eyes. “You can be a part of your son’s life without us being together.”
“Isabelle, I’m only going to entertain this conversation one more time. I want you. I want our kid. I’m willing to take things slow, but let me be clear...you...are mine.” His words cause my breath to catch and my legs to feel weak. “If there’s one thing I’m sure of, it’s how much I want you...baby or not. I want you.” He reaches out and thumbs away a tear that falls down my cheek before placing his mouth on mine. I forgot how soft his lips feel, and I instantly sag into his body.
Kiran hungrily takes my mouth, reminding me how great life was for a short period of time.
I whimper against his lips as he opens his mouth and starts moving his tongue against mine. A spark of desire penetrates the wall I built after I left Kiran. I pull him tighter against my body, ready to impale myself on him when a knock on the door causes Kiran to growl and pull away from me.
“What?” he snaps at whoever interrupted us.
“Gavin told me to have you call him when...when you’re not busy trying to get it on with my sister.” Alex grumbles out the second part, causing us both to laugh.
I open the door and smile. “Nobody is getting it on,” I lie.
“Not anymore.” Kiran laughs before shaking his head.
“Well, stop doing whatever you’re not doing and let’s go talk to our grandparents before we break the news we’re leaving already.” I give Kiran a quick smile then I follow Alex outside.
Kiran
We make the almost ten-hour drive to Denver, stopping every couple of hours. Isabelle’s bladder appears to be the size of a pea because she consistently said she had to use the restroom. But she’s safe and healthy, so neither Alex nor I complained.
When I spoke to Gavin, he told me everything at our apartment appeared normal. Kate went over, cleaned out our fridge, and restocked it with food. He also mentioned that he found a detailed report that claims the Mexican authorities confirmed with a DNA test the body they found not far from San Marcos was Damian Paasch.
Before I went to Mexico, I felt nothing but loathing toward Damian. Any man who’s willing to steal a child—even his own child—is a monster, plain and simple. However, when I met Damian, my opinion of him slightly changed. Right or wrong, he loves Isabelle in a way my own father never loved me.
Now, Isabelle is feeling the loss of the only family she’s known while she’s still clinging to the hope he might still be alive. Knowing that and knowing how attached Kate appears to be to the man, both Gavin and I made the decision not to tell them about the information he found. If they start digging around online, they could very well find the report themselves, but until they do, we’ve decided to stay quiet.
“We’re here,” Alex says, pulling into our apartment complex. We picked a place about ten minutes from Gavin, Kate, and Callie. Isabelle perks up and looks around. When I get out of the car, relief of finally being done with traveling seeps in.
Alex starts walking up the steps to our second-floor apartment with Isabelle trailing behind him, gifting me a nice view of her incredible ass.
Isabelle turns and catches me with a smile on her face. We make it inside and my previous relief is multiplied. Denver may not be the safest place for Isabelle, but keeping her safely tucked into our apartment will give me a sense of peace, especially after having a small idea of the life she’s been living.
“I’ll show you to our room.” I grab her hand and walk down the hall. My room is slightly messy but it’s not until I see the huge hole in the wall and the broken desk chair that I wish I’d cleaned up before we took off.
Alex stands at the doorway. “I hope you keep that temper of yours in check when my nephew arrives.” My face falls as his words bring back memories from my childhood. My mother constantly yelled at my father until he finally had enough and lashed out at everyone. “Dude, I was joking.”
Isabelle remains quiet. I watch as her eyes dart to the wall then around the room.
“Yeah, I know.” I laugh off his comment as fear of what she’s thinking sets in.
“I’m going to lie down for a while. The drive did me in.” Alex smiles at his sister then opens his bedroom door. Isabelle walks over to the chair that’s lying on its side and rights it before sitting down on the edge of my bed.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
I shrug. Do I want to her tell that I don’t get mad often, but when I do, I usually blow up, hit, or throw something? Yeah, no thank you.
“Damian has a temper...had a temper,” she corrects. “I occasionally saw it when I walked into a room unexpected or if someone did something they shouldn’t in front of me. Everyone on his payroll would talk about his crazy outbursts, but I rarely witnessed them.” She looks straight at me. “You want to know why?” she asks after she reaches out and places her hand in mine. “Because he took his role as a parent very seriously. He loved me and he did everything in his power to shield me from the horrible things that surrounded my life, and that included his horrible temper, but that didn’t mean his temper magically disappeared.” She squeezes my hand, keeping her eyes locked with mine. “Just because you get angry doesn’t mean you’ll make a bad parent.” She lays her head on my shoulder.
“Now, do you want to talk about what made you mad?” I have no idea if I should answer her. It was her and that damn letter that set me off. But...the only way we can make a relationship work is with honesty. I guess now will be my first test on how well that works for me.
“I read your letter.” I can feel her head nod but she remains silent. “I hadn’t known you long enough to be in love with you, or at least that’s what I kept telling myself.” I pause, willing myself to relax. I take a deep breath and I’m engulfed by her smell. Just like that, my tension starts to melt.
“I convinced myself that you left because you’re addicted to that life—something I couldn’t give you—and it pissed me off. You leaving pissed me off, that’s the only way I could deal with the pain.”
She sniffles. “I’m sorry. God, I’m so sorry,” she says, trying her best not to cry.
“It’s okay. I know now and I can’t say I wouldn’t have done the same thing if I were in your shoes. Plus, it paid off well for Gavin. When I wasn’t in bed ignoring the world, I was working.”
“In bed?” she says as she lifts her head and stares at me.
“Not like that. I was alone. Always.”
Isabelle breathes out a sigh. “I wouldn’t have blamed you if you had moved on,” she counters, but her unguarded eyes tell a different story.
“You’re kind of hard to top, Isabelle Paasch. Thankfully, now I won’t have to try.” I take her face in my hands as I start kissing her. Like every time before, our connection consumes me.
From our kiss alone, my body sparks with need. I want to scoop her up and show her how badly I’ve missed her, but we can’t, not yet.
Regretfully, I pull away, leaving Isabelle with a look of longing on her face. I’m willing my body to calm down before she notices my erection when she blurts out, “I think tomorrow we should find a doctor.” She runs her hand down her bump. “I want to know the baby is okay.” She flushes and looks down to the floor.
“What?” I question as I place my finger under her chin, tilting her head back.
“I also want to know if it’s safe to...you know,” she adds, waving her hand back and forth between us.
“Ah,” I say with a smile in my voice.
“I de
finitely want to know I’m not going to be poking my kid if we have sex.”
Isabelle stifles a laugh before she climbs up my bed and rest her head on my pillow. “We’ll find a doctor and confirm everything is fine then maybe we could buy a few things for him,” she hesitantly adds. “My pregnancy hasn’t seemed real, but I think buying him things will change that.”
I smile to myself as I crawl up next to her. I brush a strand of hair out of her face before she nuzzles into my chest. Her breathing evens out as her body gives in to sleep. I haven’t felt this peaceful since the night before Isabelle left. But right now feels better because we don’t have the possibility of her leaving hanging over our heads, and because of that, I feel content for the first time in my life.
****
Finding a doctor that was willing to see a twenty-seven-week pregnant woman—who willingly admitted she hadn’t received prenatal care—proved to be harder than we expected. Not to mention, we’re not using insurance—we’re paying cash—but we finally found a doctor.
Our son is healthy just like Dr. Ross predicted, but this time, we were given a due date: May 22nd. With it being the beginning of March, we still have time to buy what we need without rushing.
“I can’t believe you’re pregnant,” Kate says, sounding pleased as she rubs her hand over Isabelle’s belly. After a week of being in Denver without anyone trailing us, we decided it was time for the girls to finally visit.
“I’m confused. Does this make me an aunt or a cousin because I have to say, I always thought if Kiran had a kid, I would get to call myself Aunt Kate.” Kate smirks at me while I shake my head. Callie has called me Uncle Kiran since she started talking.
“Kate, you’ll be the aunt and I’ll be the cousin,” Callie innocently says. Callie connected the dots from conversations we had when she was around that Kate and Isabelle share a father—so of course that makes them sisters. I don’t think it matters the label anyone uses. These two women will always share a special bond, and thankfully, they’ll get to be a part of each other’s lives for good.
Locked Away (Living With Lies Book 2) Page 19