Defensive (Guarded Heart #1)

by J. D. Rivera

  “You look relieved. Did you think I’d say no?” she asked.

  “Honestly, I was almost positive that you’d say yes, but then it seemed like forever before you said it and yeah, I panicked.”

  She smirked. “Sorry. It’s just that, after everything, I was a little shocked. I mean I knew you were going to ask. Just not this soon.”

  “Everything that happened made me realize how much I want this. I don’t want it to be so easy next time you decide to push me away,” I told her.

  “I’m really hoping there isn’t a next time.”

  “Me, too.” Suddenly, I realized something. “What did you mean by you knew I was going to ask?” I asked.

  “I might have overheard you talking to my parents while I was in the hospital.”

  I grinned. “Did I at least surprise you?”

  “Yeah, you did. I think we have an audience,” she said, glancing around the room.

  I had asked to be seated alone, but that didn’t mean we were in a private room. “I’m thinking you’ll need to call your parents on the way home or they might find out another way,” I said.

  “Oh, you’re probably right.”

  After finishing our dessert, we drove home as quickly as possible and I showed her how amazing the rest of our lives would be together.

  Vanessa

  The finals were over and the Thunder were the NBA champions. We had put off getting married until the season was over because we didn’t know how far they would go. I was glad we had waited since they went all the way to the end. We’d decided on a small ceremony in Puerto Rico with just our family and close friends. I had never been there and I was really excited about seeing the island. Once the wedding was over, Jackson and I would take a short flight to St. Croix to spend our honeymoon alone, while everyone else stayed in Puerto Rico a few more days.

  I was really glad he was paying for everyone because I knew my parents wouldn’t have been able to afford staying longer. They deserved the vacation. I had just sat down in the boat next to my mom, waiting to be taken to the restaurant located on Lago Dos Bocas, a lake in the center of the island. We had chosen the restaurant for our rehearsal dinner because of its secluded location and great food. “You look so happy, honey,” she said in my ear, leaning over.

  “It’s because I am. I feel like this is all a dream and I’m going to wake up soon.”

  “It’s not a dream and you deserve this. You’ve been through a lot.”

  “Thanks, Mom,” I told her as I took a peek at Jackson. He was having an animated conversation with his uncle, who still lived on the island. He caught me looking and winked at me before he went back to his conversation.

  “Are you and Dad enjoying the island?” I asked.

  “Yes. You know how your Dad is, though. He’d just sit in the hotel room and look out the window if I didn’t drag him out. We went and toured Old San Juan today.”

  “Really? We did that, too. I got some cool souvenirs. Did you get anything?”

  “I just got some jewelry,” she said. “You know how I am about that. Your dad got a new wallet.”

  “That’s great. Make sure to go by the different forts. I know that Dad loves stuff like that.”

  “This place is something else,” my dad said, joining us.

  “Beautiful. I can’t believe Jackson’s family left this place for Dallas,” I agreed.

  “Yeah, I bet that was a shock.”

  The boat took off toward the restaurant and I closed my eyes, letting the tropical air hit me. It felt great and I felt so lucky to be here. Not only was I marrying the most amazing man on earth, I was also marrying him on a beautiful island.

  I opened my eyes and took in the bamboo lining the lake and different flowers and trees. I wasn’t sure why anyone would ever leave this place. It was so calm and relaxing. Well, at least this part of the island was. Traffic back in San Juan had been a little hectic but I’d put up with it to have this piece of Heaven nearby.

  The boat came to a stop and we all exited the boat. I waited on Jackson, who was the last off the boat. “This place is amazing. Thanks for suggesting this as our rehearsal dinner,” I told him as I took his hand.

  “Only the best for you. It’s not fancy but the food is delicious and the view is amazing.”

  “You know I don’t care about fancy.”

  He leaned down and kissed my check. “Yes, I do and that’s just one of many things I love about you.”

  “Thanks, babe,” I said as I leaned into him.

  We were all seated in a covered outdoor eating space located right on the water. My parents were on my right and Amanda and Landon were across from me. I looked over to my left, where Jackson was seated; Eric was next to him. I loved that they were so close. Eric looked up to Jackson and Jackson had promised to play some basketball with him this summer. Giving him lessons, almost like a private basketball camp.

  “I can’t believe you are getting married tomorrow,” Amanda said.

  I looked at her, noticing my brother had his arm draped around her chair. It made me grin because they had been taking everything really slow, but I had a great feeling everything would work out for them. “Me, neither. It seems so unreal.”

  “I’m so excited for you. And I can’t believe you guys are letting us stay here this week.”

  “That was all Jackson’s idea,” I told her. “Have you guys figured out what you’re going to do while you’re here?”

  “We were looking at some zip lining tours. It’s something I’ve always wanted to do and what better place to do it?” she asked.

  “I told her we’d do anything she wants while we’re here,” Landon said.

  “You better let her.”

  “When we get back to the room tonight, I have several brochures for her to look at.”

  My eyebrows shot up at his response. “Yeah, Eric is staying with your parents tonight,” Amanda said.

  “I am so happy for you two. Maybe we’ll be at your rehearsal dinner next.”

  “Let’s not get ahead of ourselves,” Amanda argued as Landon said, “It will be.”

  I snickered. “That’s for y’all to work out, but it’s nice to see the two of you happy.”

  “Hey, Amanda, remember that one night?” Ray yelled from the end of the table, drunk.

  I looked over at Jackson and he immediately got up and went to Ray. They walked off to the side of the building and Amanda sat frozen.

  “Wanna tell me what that was about?” Landon asked.

  “Later,” she whispered.

  “He’s an ass. Don’t worry about him,” I told my brother.

  Jackson came back a few minutes later and sat down. He whispered into my ear. “He’s trashed so I called him a cab. He’s taking the boat back over now.”

  “How in the hell did he get trashed so quickly?” I asked.

  “He’s been drinking all day, I think. He’ll be better tomorrow or I’ll find another best man. He’s not going to ruin our day.”

  “Just keep him away from Amanda and Landon,” I whispered.

  “Okay. I’ll try my best. Do you really think that Landon would get mad if he knew that they hooked up?” he asked.

  I thought about it. “Probably not but I don’t want anything to ruin what they’ve started.”

  He nodded and we both went back to conversations with different people. A few speeches were made about Jackson and me and luckily we all had a great time.

  We got back to our suite, which included two bedrooms. Later that night, I planned on making Jackson sleep in the other bedroom. I didn’t want him to see me at all before the wedding. A little old fashioned maybe, but I didn’t want any bad luck associated with this wedding. I wanted this marriage to last.

  “Did you like the dinner?” Jackson asked as we took off our shoes.

  “I loved it. It was so peaceful and the food was so good.”

  “I agree, but I’m glad it’s over.”

  “Why’s that?” I asked as
he backed me up to the bed.

  He gave me a breathtaking kiss then pulled back. “Because now I have you all to myself. Let me help you out of that dress.”

  I turned around and he unzipped my dress very, very slowly. I felt like I was going to burst with anticipation by the time he turned me around and caught my lips with his. He placed his hands on my shoulders, slowly moving my straps down. My hands found his hair and pulled us closer together. I felt like I couldn’t get close enough to him. I couldn’t believe that this time, tomorrow night, I would be his wife. Vanessa Berrios. Mrs. Jackson Berrios.

  He finally let my dress fall from my body to pool on the floor and pushed me on the bed. He stood above me; his face looked like he had never seen my body before. “Holy shit, Vanessa. If I’d known you were wearing this underneath that dress, we wouldn’t have lasted through dinner.” Before we had left, I had purchased some sexy bras and panties. These were black lace with small pink bows.

  “You like it?” I asked.

  “More than like it. I love it.” He lowered himself on to me. I pulled his shirt off and touched every inch of his chest with my hands as I told him how much I love him.

  For the next couple of hours, he made sure that he was well acquainted with my body. He made me feel loved, safe, and treasured. I couldn’t have imagined that this would be my life. I thought I had known love when I’d married Shane but now I knew that I was wrong. The love I’d felt for Shane was strong friendship. This was soul mate, breathtaking, heart stopping love. What every girl dreams about and I had it.

  “You have to leave,” I told him as we cuddled after.

  “Why do I have to leave? Maybe you should be the one to leave.”

  “Because all of my stuff is in here. You have, like, one suitcase to carry over to the other room.”

  “What if I promise to close my eyes when I leave in the morning?” he asked as he kissed my shoulder.

  I rubbed his back, enjoying his kisses. “No. That won’t work. You’d probably trip and fall. And then we’d spend our wedding day in a hospital.”

  “Leave it to you to come up with that scenario.”

  I giggled. “Please just go. I don’t want you to accidentally see me before the wedding. I don’t want to take any chances.”

  “Fine. I’ll go in a minute. First, I need to make sure I kiss you thoroughly.”

  “I think you already did,” I said as he kissed my neck and a moan escaped my throat.

  “Not even close,” he whispered before he bit down on my ear.

  He could leave later. Much, much later.

  Jackson

  The sun was shining into my eyes. I could hear voices and doors opening and closing. I rolled over to look at the clock; it was ten in the morning. I was getting married at two so I hadn’t overslept. All I had to do was go downstairs and get my hair cut and styled. I had only had my hair styled one other time for a trendy magazine.

  I crawled out of bed, going straight for the shower. I was grinning because I knew that the next time I took a shower, Vanessa would be with me as my wife. I grabbed my body wash off the ledge and soaped my body, relaxing under the stream. A soon as she said “I do,” she’d be mine and I could relax. It would take a lot of work to push me away again.

  After I got out of the shower and threw on a T-shirt and cargo shorts, I texted Ray. I needed to see what was up with him.

  Me: Want to meet me downstairs for some breakfast?

  Ray: Sure. Ten minutes.

  Me: Okay.

  I met him in the restaurant. He looked like complete shit. I normally didn’t notice things like that but he looked rough. “What’s up, man?” I asked.

  “Rough night. You ready to do this?” he asked as we followed a hostess to a table.

  “I was ready the day I met her.”

  He slid onto a chair. “Well, I guess we all can’t be lucky.”

  I sat down across from him. “No, not everyone can, but it always helps not to be an asshole.”

  “What’s that mean?’ he asked before we both ordered some coffee.

  “It means that you treat women like trash. Look at Amanda. You used her for sex and then you were a complete dick to her the next time you saw her. And what the hell was that last night?”

  “What was what?”

  “You tried to bring up the night y’all hooked up. Right in front of Landon.”

  “What does it matter if I brought it up in front of Landon?”

  “They’re dating,” I said. “I’m sure he doesn’t want to know about her sexual encounters.”

  He took another sip of water. “He looked like a total tool. She can do better.”

  It all clicked. Ray was jealous. Everyone else was growing up and had someone. He was alone. “I get that you might be jealous, but you don’t get to call him a tool. He happens to be my brother-in-law and he’s a really good friend.”

  “Jealous? Why would I be jealous that you’re stuck with one woman for the rest of your life?” he asked.

  I grabbed the coffee from the waiter. “We both know that I’m not stuck. I want to be with her the rest of my life. Now, are you going to be an ass the entire day?”

  “I won’t say another word.”

  We ate our meal in relative quiet, talking mainly about baseball and the previous basketball season. After we were finished, we walked to the elevator together.

  “Look, I’m sorry,” he said finally. “Maybe I have been jealous, but I am happy for you.”

  “Thanks. You’ll find someone someday.”

  After I went to the spa to get my hair cut, I came back to my room to get dressed. I had just opened the closet when someone knocked on my bedroom door. I opened it, looking into the face of Vanessa’s dad, Walter Adams. I was already pretty sure what he wanted but I asked anyway. “What’s up, Walter?”

  “Do you have time for a talk?”

  I motioned for him to come inside. “Yeah. All I have to do is change my clothes.”

  “I’ll be quick,” he said as he walked through the door.

  “Okay.”

  “I gave you my blessing about marrying my daughter and you still have it, but I still feel like I need to say something.” He paused. “She’s a great girl. She’s been through a lot and she hasn’t deserved any of it. As her future husband, you need to protect her as much as you can. You better never be the reason she’s hurting.”

  I swallowed. “I can’t promise I’ll never hurt her. Life’s crazy, but I can promise it will never be intentional. I know what she’s been through and she’ll never have to deal with that again. She is absolutely the only woman for me.”

  “Okay. Well, then, I guess congratulations.”

  “Thanks, sir.”

  I walked out to the platform overlooking the ocean, where I would be marrying the love of my life. Almost everyone was seated, waiting for the ceremony to start. It felt like the hours had been ticking away at a snail’s pace; two o’clock was taking forever. I glanced down at my watch. One forty-five. Only fifteen more minutes.

  I looked over at my dad, who nodded his head at me. That was his way of saying I had this and congratulations all in one. I nodded back and looked over at Landon and Eric. Eric was busy talking about some fish he had seen earlier in the day.

  The minister came out and I stepped beside Ray on the platform. Music started and two of my cousins ushered Vanessa’s mom and my mom down the aisle to their seats. A small time later, Amanda came down the aisle. I’m sure she looked pretty, given the looks on Landon and Ray’s faces, but I couldn’t tell. All I cared about was seeing Vanessa.

  The music changed. It felt like hours went by before I saw Vanessa and Walter walk down the aisle. My heart stopped; so did my breathing. She was absolutely stunning. She was wearing a white sleeveless dress that looked like it floated behind her in the sand.

  After she made her way to me and her dad had given her away, I took her hand and kissed it. “Wow,” I said and everyone laughed.

 
; “Thank you,” she whispered with a nervous smile.

  We went through the typical wedding stuff, but all I can remember is the part where the minister announced, “I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.”

  I picked her up to my eye level and kissed her hard. I didn’t give a shit that our parents were watching. She was my wife now and I wanted to kiss her. She kissed me back and slipped her tongue inside my mouth, making me groan. I wanted to skip the reception and move on to the wedding night. I finally pulled apart when I heard several people cough and say “get a room.”

  I looked around and everyone was smiling and laughing. I pulled Vanessa close to me. “I love you, Mrs. Berrios.”

  “I love you, too, husband.”

  Vanessa

  I woke up in the middle of the night feeling a horrible cramp. Not this again. I couldn’t take it again.

  “Are you okay, babe?” Jackson asked from beside me in bed.

  “Yeah. Just Braxton Hicks again. I was really hoping I’d sleep better tonight than I did last night,” I told him as I soothed my hand over my stomach.

  “Is there anything I can get you? Let me get you a glass of water.” He got out of bed and I watched him walk out of the room then laid back down. What the hell is that? I could feel wetness underneath me. Shit, did I just pee the bed?

  I crawled out of the bed, heading for the bathroom when Jackson entered the room. “What are you doing?” he asked.

  “Nothing. Just, um… don’t lie down until I get back,” I told him as I felt it running down my legs.

  “What? Why? I’ll put your water on the nightstand.”

  “I peed the bed, okay?” I blurted out as I walked into the bathroom, slamming the door behind me. I had been getting ticked off easily the last couple of months. He hadn’t even done anything yet I wanted to go back out there and hit him. I sat down on the toilet but I couldn’t stop peeing. That’s when it clicked that it wasn’t pee. My water had broken.

  Instantly, I was terrified. I was going to have to give birth to this child. I had been counting down to this moment since we’d found out I was pregnant on our first wedding anniversary. I had practically been on bed rest the entire time because of Jackson, not the doctor. My doctor had figured out that I had low progesterone levels early on in the pregnancy, which may have caused my previous miscarriages, but everything else had been normal. If Jackson had his way, though, I would have been in a wheelchair the entire time, not lifting a muscle.