It was simple as that, and he wasn't going to fight something that felt so amazingly right to his heart and emotions. Though he had to admit that such a huge, life-altering revelation was both a scary and exhilarating prospect, like the first time he'd gone skydiving and realized how much he loved the rush he experienced as he'd jumped out of the plane and soared through the sky. That's what Chayse was to him—a source of adrenaline for his mind, heart, and soul. And he wanted to experience that exciting, pulse-pounding rush on a daily basis.
Unfortunately, he still had Chayse's resistance to deal with—those soul-deep insecurities she'd allowed him to glimpse this weekend, and those painful vulnerabilities that kept her from letting anyone too close for fear that she'd end up all alone again.
He'd learned that Chayse was all woman on the outside, tough and sexy and determined, but internally she was still a little girl, aching for the love and approval she'd never gotten from her own parents, and searching for a place where she belonged. A place stable and safe and filled with unconditional acceptance. A place where she didn't have to worry about the people whom she trusted and loved turning their backs on her when times got tough and she needed them the most.
Adrian wanted to be there for Chayse, always—as a friend, a partner, and a lover. And it wasn't a commitment he planned to take lightly. Now all he had to do was convince her just how sincere he was, that he wanted this short weekend fling to last a lifetime.
He picked up his pace, eager to be with her again. He grinned like a fool, finally understanding what his brothers had found with each of their wives. He'd given both Eric and Steve a hard time when they'd taken the plunge and admitted they'd fallen in love, and all the while he'd sworn that he had no desire to let another woman get to him on an emotional level ever again. His brothers had been emphatic that it was a matter of finding the right woman, and he distinctly remembered Eric making the comment that he'd better be careful, because love might just sneak up on him and bite him on the ass when he least expected it.
At the time, he'd scoffed at Eric's sappy analogy. Now Adrian was forced to admit that he had been bitten when he'd least expected it, big-time, and both of his brothers were going to have a field day when they discovered his downfall. But it was a small price to pay for all that he'd gained.
Adrian's heart pumped anxiously as he rounded the bend in the road and came in for the home stretch, until he noticed that Chayse's car was no longer parked next to his Jeep.
His stomach twisted with dread as the truth kicked him in the chest. He was too late to tell Chayse how he felt about her, to convince her to take a chance on him. She was already gone.
Oh Lord, what had she done?
Pressing her fingers to her trembling lips, Chayse stared at the photos she'd developed from her weekend with Adrian, which were spread out on the coffee table in her living room. Nearly six hours had passed since she'd left the cabin while Adrian was out on a morning jog. She hadn't heard from him since, not that she expected him to make any effort to find her after the less than admirable way she'd snuck out on him.
Her abrupt departure, along with the quick, impersonal note she'd left in the kitchen, thanking him for being a part of her calendar project, had no doubt been as effective as a slap in his face after the intimate weekend they'd shared. At the time she'd convinced herself that she was saving them both an unpleasant confrontation, that a clean break was easier on both of them, but alone in her apartment with only her conscience as company, she was coming to acknowledge her leaving for the cowardly behavior it was.
Her throat tightened with another surge of tears, and she swallowed them back as she leaned forward and fanned out a pile of pictures of Adrian looking sexier and more gorgeous than a man had a right to. There were phenomenal shots of him chopping wood, and more they'd taken during their hikes. The majority had been taken without a shirt, his chest and shoulders breathtakingly wide and strong and most definitely drool-worthy. She was proud of the shots, and what one could glimpse of his scars only served to make him appear more rugged, like a real outdoor man who lived as one with nature.
He was extremely photogenic, and there wasn't a bad picture in the bunch, which made the task of finding only four for the calendar project a daunting task—the end results of which she'd promised Adrian he could approve. Which meant she'd eventually have to contact him, and see him again in person.
She pushed aside the professional shots and reached for the candid photos she'd taken of Adrian while he'd been sleeping and had gradually awakened. A smile touched her lips as she remembered the playful, flirta-tious session. Now she had her own personal storybook in front of her, and there was no ignoring what she saw in Adrian's gaze, in his expression. There was adoration, sensual hunger, and a deeper emotion that made her feel weak in the knees. A blend of trust and caring she'd been so scared to believe in.
Then there were the pictures Adrian had taken of her that morning, which told an interesting tale of their own. At first, she'd been uncomfortable being the focus of his attention, but he'd coaxed her to open up, to trust him, and she had, physically and emotionally, she realized as she picked up one of the photos of her seducing the camera, and Adrian.
Her heart pounded so hard her chest hurt. Despite every attempt she'd made to keep her emotions out of the equation of the weekend, she'd gone and fallen in love with Adrian. Her own story was right there in her eyes for her to see—the way she felt about him, along with the fact that she'd given him a piece of herself that would forever be his. Not just her body, or her heart, but her soul, as well.
His words came back to her, so accurate and sincere. I look into your eyes and I see a little girl who's carried a wealth of emotional burdens for too many years now, and a woman who is afraid to take chances on what most likely is a sure thing. I see a woman who hides behind her camera, even while she tries to uncover everyone else's secrets.
Adrian knew her well. And she knew without a doubt that he'd taken the pictures of her this morning because he'd wanted her to see what he saw in her. It was all there, insecurities and fears, the gradual sensual blossoming he'd cajoled out of her, and even the love she hadn't realized had found its way into her heart.
She felt something wet trickle down her cheek and wiped away a tear. Then another. She caught sight of a picture of Adrian, the one where he was lying on the blanket near the creek, bare-chested and chewing on a blade of grass. But it wasn't the sexy smile that drew her, or even the come-hither look in his eyes that told Chayse how much he wanted her. No, it was the scar that started a few inches above the waistband of his shorts—an injury he'd been so self-conscious of, enough to keep refusing her dozens of attempts to get him to pose for her charity calendar.
She traced the line in the photograph, remembering vividly how that puckered skin had felt beneath her fingers, her lips. She thought of the way she'd confronted Adrian about those scars when she'd arrived at the cabin, how she'd made him face them, deal with them, and not let an old injury affect his decision to do the calendar project. Those scars were a part of who and what he was, she'd told him.
She laughed around another bout of tears and knew she ought to take her own advice to heart. Adrian's scars were on the outside, hers were on the inside, but the suffering and insecurity that came with those wounds were the same. And it was time she confronted her own personal scars, and her past. Face the pain, deal with it, and not let it affect her decision to let Adrian into her life.
A brisk knock on the door startled her, and she stood, swiping at her damp eyes and cheeks as she headed toward the entryway. She looked into the peephole and saw Adrian standing on the other side with a fierce expression on his face. He looked really pissed off, and she wondered at the wisdom of letting him inside. Maybe it was better if they had this conversation in the morning, after he'd cooled off a bit.
He banged on the door with his fist, rattling the wood and the chain securing the door. "Open up, Chayse," he ordered in an uncompromising tone. "Or else your
neigh-bors are going to hear a very personal conversation out here in the hallway. "
Knowing he was a man as good as his word, and not wanting her neighbors to be privy to her personal life, she unlocked the door and opened it for him. He stormed into her apartment, his entire body fairly crackling with energy and a fury she knew he had every right to feel after the way she'd bolted on him this morning. His hair was tousled around his head, he hadn't shaved since the night before, and he looked not only exhausted but dark and dangerous, as well.
But she didn't fear him. Not at all. That he'd made the effort to figure out where she lived was a very positive thing in her estimation. If he didn't care, he wouldn't be here. And she knew that wasn't the case with Adrian. If anything, he cared too much, and she was lucky to have found a man like him.
She exhaled a deep breath and asked very calmly, "How did you find out where I lived?"
He spun around and jammed his hands on his jean-clad hips. He glared at her, which did nothing to conceal the hurt she detected in his eyes, along with a brighter determination. "It wasn't easy. First, I had to hunt down Mia, who ought to wear a tracking device because I was one step behind her most of the afternoon. Once I found her, I demanded your address, and seeing that she owed me one for giving you the directions to the cabin, she cracked. "
Chayse bit her bottom lip to keep from laughing, certain that Adrian wouldn't appreciate her finding humor at his expense. At least not at the moment, while he was so angry and hurt.
An awkward silence descended between them as he continued to glare at her, and she waved a hand toward the photographs on the coffee table. "Umm, since you're here, you can take a look at the pictures I took and we can decide which ones you'd like to go into the calendar. "
"At the moment, I don't give a damn about those pictures!" He stalked toward her, blue fire blazing in his eyes. "That's not why I'm here. "
For every purposeful step he took forward, she took one back, until her bottom hit the edge of the small kitchen table that adjoined the living room. He closed the distance between them, and there was no mistaking the erection straining against the fly of his jeans and pressing against her mound.
His gaze held hers as he tugged on the snap of her pants and ripped open the front placket. A frisson of excitement shot through her, making her feel alive and heady with anticipation, something only this man had the ability to trigger within her.
She knew what was going to happen, knew he was going to possess her in themost elemental way possible. Stake his claim on her. Brand her as his. An aggressive, wild mating that would bend her to his will and allow him to release the fury and anger swirling inside him in a purely sexual way. It was Adrian's way. Just like the first time he'd taken her so fiercely at the cabin, when she'd provoked him beyond his restraint.
He dragged her pants and underwear down her legs and yanked them off, then quickly unbuckled his belt, unzipped his jeans, and freed his shaft. He lifted her so she was sitting on the edge of the table, and with his hands pressed against her knees, he widened her thighs and fit himself in between. She was already wet and aroused, and his erection slid along her slick flesh, the head of his cock burrowing into her weeping sex.
She braced her hands behind her on the table and shuddered, wanting this, but decided she ought to put up at least a token protest. "Adrian… what are you doing?"
A muscle in his cheek ticked. "Since you only seem to understand the way my body talks to you, I'm going to let it do the talking for me." He grabbed her ass and jerked her to the edge of the table at the same time he flexed his hips and thrust into her, making her gasp at the depth to which he'd plowed.
He rolled his hips, grinding himself against her sex. "Do you know what my body is saying right now?" he demanded gruffly.
She shook her head, moaning as he slowly withdrew, and quivering as he filled her again. "No. "
"It's telling you that I'm falling in love with you," he said, the tight edge in his voice softening as he pulled back and surged in again. "That I'm not going to ignore what's between us, and I'm not going to let you walk away either." Out… and back in again in a slow, languid stroke that made her melt around him. "I need you in my life, and you sure as hell need me in yours. "
Her heart rejoiced, and she slanted him an assessing glance that gave away nothing of her own emotions just yet. "That's a little arrogant, don't you think?"
Watching her expression, he withdrew, and she whimpered at the loss, then gasped sharply when he returned, burying himself to the hilt. "I'm inside your body, sweetheart. As deep as I can get. I can feel your heartbeat. I can see the emotion in your eyes. I have every right to be arrogant. And demanding. "
"Yes, you do," she agreed solemnly.
And then another revelation struck her. Adrian was all about taking risks, in everything he did—in his extreme sports, when making love, and even when it came to wearing his heart on his sleeve. As for her, she'd always played it safe, but not anymore. Not if she in-tended to meet this man halfway in all things. And that included trusting him with her heart and emotions. Right here and now.
With him full and heavy and throbbing inside her, she slid her hands into his thick, silky hair and nipped his chin, pressed a soft, open-mouthed kiss to his lips, then looked so deeply into his eyes she thought she'd drown in the unabashed emotion she saw shining there. The adoration. The hope and need that reflected her own.
She smiled and framed his face in her hands, and without any hesitation she said, "Adrian Wilde, I love you. "
With a grateful moan, he captured her mouth with his, kissing her as deeply and fiercely as he plunged into her body. So much passion. Earthy and sensual and irresistible.
The ending came fast for both of them, and when his climax rolled through him, she took his harsh groans into her mouth and gave back her own sweet sounds of release.
Amazingly enough, after that physically draining session Adrian seemed to have enough strength to carry her to her bedroom, so she hung on for the ride and gave him directions down the hall. He set her gently on the bed and stretched out beside her, and she knew they still had a few things to discuss. But this time she was ready to face the past and hopefully secure her future.
"Why did you leave the cabin today without waiting for me to return from my run?" he asked as he stroked his fingers along her arm. There was no censure in his tone, no more anger, just the need to understand.
She'd already given him her love, now she gave him her honesty. "I was scared… mostly of what you make me feel, and my first instinct was to run from my emotions. "
"What I make you feel is supposed to be a good thing, sweetheart," he murmured gently.
She stared up at him, feeling like the luckiest girl on planet Earth to have somehow earned this man's patience and understanding. "I know that now, but at the time I wasn't ready to face my feelings, or trust in them. "
"Are you ready now?"
She nodded and whispered, "Yes. "
He lifted a curious brow, obviously wanting more answers, which he fully deserved. "What changed your mind?"
"It was those pictures you took of me this morning. I saw myself through your eyes, just as you'd intended. All my emotions were right there in front of me, and there was no denying how hard and fast I'd fallen for you." She reached out and touched his unshaven jaw, loving the rough, arousing texture against her fingertips. "I don't want to keep living through the pictures I take of other people. I want to make my own storybook of memories, real ones, and I don't want be alone anymore, Adrian. I want to take a chance on a sure thing. I want to take a chance on you. "
"Oh yeah, I like the sound of that." He grinned, looking like the rogue of her dreams, and the man who'd stolen her heart. "But taking a chance on me means being part of my big, crazy family. Think you can handle that?"
Her heart pounded crazily in her chest, the gift he was offering more than she'd ever believed possible. "Oh, Adrian, I would love to be a part of your family. Do y
ou think they can handle me snapping pictures of them when they least expect it?"
He chuckled, the sound reverberating with warmth and a bit of wickedness. "They'll get used to it. "
She sighed blissfully, a huge smile on her face. "With each of us bearing our own scars, we're quite a pair, aren't we?"
"We're a perfect pair." He ran the tip of his finger down the slope of her nose, then he grew serious. "I know this has all happened so quickly, but I promise we'll work this relationship thing out, take whatever time you need to adjust to having me in your life. "
"I don't need any more time, Adrian." Now that he was hers, there was no room left in her heart for uncertainties. She was risking it all. "I chased you for four months and you've just given me the best weekend of my entire life. And I really do love you, and nothing is going to change that. "
"I love you, too, Chayse Douglas." He kissed her lips, softly, reverently, then pulled back and grinned down at her, his eyes bright with tenderness, and something more mischevious. "You know, it's gonna take a lot of years to tame my wild ways, but I do believe you're just the right woman for the job. How do you feel about marrying me and becoming Mrs. Wilde One?"
She forced back the lump of emotion rising in her throat with husky laughter and thought to herself in triumphant awe: He loves me! He really, really loves me!
The knowledge chased away every last bit of Chayse's insecurities, leaving her heart wide open for this incredible man to fill up with his presence, his love. "Yes," she managed to reply around the joyful tears threading her voice. "Yes, Adrian Wilde, I'll marry you. "
Giddy with happiness, she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him on top of her, absorbing his declaration and wanting to preserve this precious moment forever, like a rare photograph in her mind. It was a wonderful beginning to her own personal storybook of mental snapshots, and she knew her private album would grow to reflect the best years of her life with the Wilde One.
Wilde Novellas Page 23