“Then why did you run downstairs?”
“Because I couldn’t . . . I couldn’t say this in front of anyone else.”
He took a step toward her, and she backed away in perfect sync. “Am, you’re scaring me. Talk to me.”
“They’re going to make me go away. Just like I warned you they would. I can’t stay and I won’t ever see you again once I’m taken. I won’t even be able to find you to make sure you’re safe.”
Drew was completely lost. He stopped pacing forward because she kept mimicking his movements and was getting dangerously near to the ledge. Instead, he held his arms out, pleading with his hands for her to come closer. “Why now?”
A sound beside him, like that of a giant pigeon coming to land, forced Drew’s attention away from Amity for a split second. What he saw would have caused him no end of concern before he’d seen the truth of the world in Amity’s touch. A man of indiscernible age, with unruly brown hair and infinite amber orbs for eyes, looked to him.
“Because she broke a cardinal law.”
“And who in the hell made those laws?” Drew asked.
“Go away, Michael,” Amity screeched at the same time.
Drew turned his gaze back to Amity. “Michael?”
“My brother.” The words came out like a curse. She clenched her fists and turned away from both of the men.
“Your brother? Doesn’t he want you to be happy?”
Michael scoffed. “Do you think a human can possibly understand anything about the happiness of an angel?”
Drew stepped closer. “I think I know more about her than you ever could.”
“Drew. Michael. Stop, both of you.” Amity’s voice was quiet and broken, and it was enough to still Drew.
Amity couldn’t believe it. This was why she didn’t allow herself to feel. The truth hurt.
It sucked.
The truth was, there was more pain in love than pleasure—especially for an angel.
“Amitiel, it is time to put this all behind you and return to Heaven,” Michael said. Although he posed it like a suggestion, it was clear that it was a demand. “A few decades, and you will feel like yourself again.”
A few decades until Drew was gone was what he meant.
She growled and wheeled on him. “You just don’t get it, do you?” she snapped.
“Am, please, tell me what’s going on,” Drew begged.
She looked over at Drew. Poor Drew, who’d had his heart broken by the misfired cupid’s bow, who had given her pleasure like she’d never felt, and heartbreak which she’d never considered. Now she was going to smash the final pieces of his heart and soul by following her brother’s will. What other choice did she have though?
Her chin quivered as she thought about how to tell him that despite her words earlier, she couldn’t fight Heaven’s will. She had to leave and never be at his side again.
“I think you should go inside, Andrew. This is no longer your concern,” Michael’s voice was full of Heaven’s authority—he was using his gifts to compel Drew to follow his instructions.
Drew took a step, and then stopped. Amity knew she should let her brother’s compulsion take effect. Part of her knew it would be easier, and maybe better for everyone, if she simply followed Heaven’s instructions and left Drew. If she stopped being his whore, as Michael had so eloquently put it. Only, it wasn’t what she wanted to do. She’d seen what his life was like in the absence of her. She’d seen the light within him diminish at such a slow rate she’d barely noticed it leave until it returned in force the instant their lips had touched again.
She shifted and was at Drew’s side in an instant. Her fingers wrapped around his hand. He quickly reciprocated, holding her hand in his own. The connection hurt as it always did. The truths he had buried inside ate away at her until one surfaced.
Drew looked at her, no doubt feeling the same warmth extending through his chest that was growing in hers. The truth was that they were better off together. She loved him. Not in the way the Heavenly host was supposed to love mortals, but in the blinding I-would-do-anything-for-him way that humans loved one another.
In that instant, she felt a peace trickle over her. She knew what she had to do. She looked skyward as the truth hit her. She just had to choose; that was all she had to do. That was what Peter had meant. Now that she’d chosen, she knew exactly what she needed to do. Her tears evaporated and she smiled as she moved her head to look at the small ledge that surrounded the rooftops.
Michael frowned, and then noticed the direction of her gaze.
“Amitiel, no.”
It was too late. She had already released Drew’s hand. She was already running. She was already free. She hit the ledge of the roof without hesitation and threw herself over the side.
Into oblivion and nothingness.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Drew didn’t even pause. As soon as he saw Amity leave the edge, he turned and raced for the stairs. He didn’t think the fall would hurt an angel, but he didn’t know enough about their anatomy to be certain and he wanted to be first on hand just in case. He took the stairs two at a time, racing against an unseen clock, knowing that he had to get to her side before her brother could take her away.
He burst from the stairwell and ran straight for the automatic glass doors.
“Amity!” he cried, garnering the attention of the people milling around the entry of the hospital.
When he worked out roughly where she should have landed, his eyes scoured the ground as he ran.
“Amity!” he cried again as he caught a glimpse of platinum hair. He didn’t even slow down as he reached her side, just threw himself to his knees beside her unconscious form. His joints ached in protest, but he didn’t care.
Blood trickled from a wound on her forehead.
“She made the ultimate sacrifice,” a voice behind Drew said. He couldn’t focus on it, but neither could he tune out the words. “For you.”
“She’s not . . . she can’t be . . . dead,” Drew muttered. He couldn’t have gone through it all, suffered and rejoiced as he had for it to end like this. All of his training left him completely as he pulled her into his arms and cradled her gently. He brushed the hair off her face and checked the wound.
The person behind him scoffed. “Only a human would think that death is the ultimate sacrifice.”
“Then what happened, Michael?” Drew said, using the name Amity had called the man earlier as he stroked Amity’s forehead. “Tell me what the fuck is going on here.”
“The whole of eternity. The balance of humanity. Being a paradigm of good. She gave it all up. For you.” The last two words were practically sneered with disgust.
Amity blinked as she opened her eyes to nothing. A clamor of confused voices filled her mind as all of her brothers burst into conversations about her choice. She wasn’t sure exactly what she had expected to find at the end of her angelic life, but it wasn’t what greeted her.
A second later, Michael appeared before her in corporeal form. With a snap of his fingers, he returned her body to her and filled in the blanks of the space surrounding them. The garden was remarkably similar to the one Peter had constructed for their talk, but there was a good reason for that. Both were modeled after Eden.
“What have you done?” Michael asked. Betrayal colored his tone and he could barely look in her eyes.
“What I had to.”
“I could still take you away. There are places in Heaven for fallen angels. Places in Hell too.”
“Are you so determined to be right that you would hurt me that way?”
“It’s not a matter of right and wrong!” he snapped, before breathing calm back into his voice. “You betrayed us.”
“You asked me to betray myself. Which is worse?”
“You’re an angel, Amity. There are responsibilities. The world needs you. I—” he cut off with a sigh. “I need you. You are the keeper of the truth; surely, you know how important that is when it co
mes to weighing judgment? I rely on you more than I should, and I’m sorry for that. But you can’t just turn your back on me.”
“I’ve felt happiness unlike any I’ve ever experienced before. I can’t turn my back on that.” Clarity had come to her during the fall and she knew now things that had been hidden from her for centuries. Her grace held her angelic power—but her grace wasn’t her. Buried deep inside, able to be extracted by another angel, was her soul. All she needed to do in order to request that process was fall. Then her grace could move on to another host.
“You’re sure about this? There is only heartbreak and pain on the path you’re choosing.”
She smiled at Michael’s naivety. He didn’t understand humans like she did, hadn’t spent years buried amongst them, living as close to their lives as an angel could—including indulging in many of their vices. Yes, being human would open her up to heartbreak and pain, but it would also offer the chance at a love the like of which no angel could ever fully appreciate.
Drew focused on the girl in his arms. She was what mattered, not the dick who’d fallen oddly silent behind him.
“Amity, can you hear me?” Drew asked.
She issued a soft moan and he breathed a sigh of relief in response.
“I did it.” She tried to sit up, but it was obviously too much for her, and she dropped back against Drew’s hold. She pressed her hand against her head and winced. “I did it, for you, Drew. I fell.”
“I need to get you inside,” he muttered as he watched her struggle to hold herself upright. Then he paused. “Why do I need to get you inside? Angels can’t get hurt, can they?”
He looked between the woman in his arms and the guy behind him.
Michael shot Amity a look filled with regret and then turned and walked away, tossing out one statement as he went. “No, but humans can.”
“Humans?” Drew still felt he was missing one vital piece of the conversation. “You’re human? How?”
“It was the only way for us to stay together.” Amity’s mouth tipped up into a smile. “I fell for you, Drew.”
As if speaking those words stole the last of her energy, she collapsed in Drew’s arms. His training kicked back in, and he raced to get her the help she needed.
There were many things Amity was going to have to get used to. Not being able to travel to Drew’s side on a whim was one. Having to get used to having a last name, a driver’s license, and a social security number was another. Although she hadn’t given those last few items a second thought, a Louis Vuitton purse with a full set of identification papers was at her hospital bedside when she woke. She was certain they were a parting gift from her brother.
The hours after she’d thrown herself off the building were a bit of a blur. She spent so much of it dozing in and out of consciousness. One thing she could remember was a steady stream of visits from hospital staff, but not from the one person she longed the most to see.
She’d left her old existence behind for him, and he hadn’t even stopped in to check on her. At least, she hadn’t seen him if he had.
Just as night was falling, the curtain around her bed fluttered and then parted to allow him to enter.
“Hey you,” he said, with his mouth set in a half-smile. His eyes were pinched with worry, but Amity thought he was a little too nonchalant for having been absent from her hospital bedside for so long. “How are you feeling?”
At the sight of him, tears welled in her eyes and fell down her cheeks.
He covered the distance to her bedside in a heartbeat and swept away the drops with his thumb. “What’s wrong?”
“You weren’t here. You didn’t come back, and I was afraid. Michael warned me that this choice would end in heartbreak . . .” she trailed off with a sniff.
Drew bundled her up into his arms, holding her against his chest while she brought her tears back under control. “He was wrong. That’s why I couldn’t come before now.”
She was confused by his statement until he pulled out a small velvet box.
“Am, I know there are a thousand more romantic ways I could do this. There are a hundred sappy words I would want to say, but I don’t want to waste time trying to find them. I don’t want another minute to pass without you knowing exactly how I feel about you. There is not a single doubt in my head that you are the one I’m supposed to spend the rest of my life with. And I want that to start right now.”
He opened the box for her and inside was an exquisite ring with a solitary princess cut diamond.
“Today, you showed me your hand, now I’m showing you mine. Will you be my everything?”
She didn’t answer him. Couldn’t. Not with her racing heart and shaking fingers. Instead, she just plucked the ring from the box and put it on her finger where it belonged, and where it would stay until the end of her days.
Epilogue
Amity ran the drying chamois along the smooth metal of the old green Corolla.
My car, she thought as a smile broke out on her lips.
It was twenty years old, the paintwork was faded, the dashboard cracked, and the seats stained, but it was hers. She’d saved up the money and purchased it all on her own. It was impossible for her to feel better about her wheels, even if it had been the newest Lamborghini.
For so many years, she’d thought humanity was the ultimate burden, but now she was able to see it with a new mindset. It was the ultimate prize. Every achievement she made, even something as small as buying a car, became another treasured memory. Of course, Drew had argued a little when she’d pointed it out in a lot as they drove by. He wanted to buy her something better, preferably something that had a few less rust holes, and was newer and prettier, but had stopped short of insisting when she’d explained why it was important to her to be able to pay for it herself—and with the money she’d earned.
It was clear that he’d understood her insistence, that while leasing a fancy new car for her was a sweet gesture, it took away her pride of achievement. She didn’t want to be his trophy—someone to look good on his arm in exchange for gifts and money. Thankfully, he didn’t want that either. They both understood that she’d chosen a mortal life, and that it would take quite some time for her to adjust to being human and all that came with that existence.
The only concession she’d granted Drew was to let him pay for the relevant courses she needed to take in order to get properly qualified to start her own personal training business so that she could eventually quit her job at the bowling alley.
“You finished?” Drew asked as he popped his head out of the front door to check on her. He had offered to help her wash her new—old—car, but she wanted to spend some time getting to know every dent and scratch on the exterior of her first real possession. She hadn’t done a fantastic job really—she’d ended up wetter than the car, causing her soggy clothes to cling to her every curve. She’d forbidden Drew from coming outside until she was finished—telling him in no uncertain terms that she was quite capable of washing a car—but she’d spotted his eager gaze watching her from the front window more than once.
“Just about,” Amity said, wiping the hood once more with her chamois. “I just have to get changed.”
“You’re set on taking your car then?”
“You’re not changing my mind. Cory is going to be our proud chariot today, whether you like it or not.”
“My car—”
She cut him off with a glare. “If you value your manhood at all, you won’t even finish any sentence that ends in you suggesting that we take your car instead.”
He cast her an overly innocent look. “I wasn’t going to suggest any such thing.”
She moved closer to him, stalking toward him in her wet clothes. “Sure you weren’t.”
He could see the direction of her thoughts, and his eyes widened.
“I just know the way a little better. It’s my father’s house after all.” He backed away from her with his hands raised in surrender. “But I can see this is import
ant to you,” he added in a rush as he backed away a little faster.
“Uh huh, sure,” she murmured when she closed in on the front door.
If he’d really wanted to escape her pursuit, he could have pushed the door shut. It wouldn’t have stopped her from going inside, but it would have signaled that he wasn’t in the mood to play.
“So, you don’t think Cory is just a death trap on wheels anymore?”
“I didn’t say that,” Drew said with a wicked grin. He was baiting her. She knew it and she didn’t care. He was going to get what was coming to him.
She passed the threshold into the house and pushed the door closed behind her.
“You think she is then?”
“If I say yes, will it get me in trouble?” His ass smacked against the back of the sofa and he ran out of room to back up. After checking behind him, he turned back to her, a smirk playing on his lips.
Amity narrowed her eyes at him and slowed her forward progress a little. She was just out of arm’s reach when she grew wary. “You almost sound like you want to be in trouble.”
In a heartbeat, he reached out for her, wrapped her in his arms, and then tossed her over the back of the sofa before leaping after her. The movement left her stunned, and before she was able to recover, Drew’s lips covered hers, and his body pinned her against the seat.
“What can I say?” he murmured between kisses. “I like your particular brand of punishment.”
Laughing, she pushed him off her and sent him tumbling to the floor. Before he had a chance to move or react, she straddled his hips and pulled off her wet shirt. “Well, in that case—you’re really going to get it!”
Drew’s hand found the base of Amity’s spine as he led her around the side gate into his father’s garden. It was hard to believe it had been twelve months since he’d come home full of expectations about setting the world on fire with his ideologies. So much had changed since then. His career was still important, and he was still set on being a cardiothoracic surgeon, but his priorities had shifted. It was all because of his angel. He knew how to have fun now and that it was okay to lighten up a little from time to time.
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