by Averi Hope
Erin was trembling. It all felt like a strange dream. No one should be able to fight that many Darogos and live. Her mind flashed over his many wounds, to his body drenched in blood.
He still might not live.
She raised an arm, rubbing her chest where an ache had bloomed. I can’t lose him. Not just because he risked his life for me, but because I need him.
A second later, the trees began to shake. So close that she could feel the heat from the rockets, an old ship, structured to mimic a Keltair living ship, rose into the sky. In seconds, it shot away, disappearing beyond the clouds.
Caleb! Is he okay?
She tried to use her heavy, but working, arms to rise, but she couldn’t. The rest of her body was still numb. She started to crawl, inch after inch, through the blood-drenched ground. Avoiding a severed hand, she shifted and continued on.
“And where are you going?” A relief she hadn’t known she could feel came over her as she was hoisted back into his arms. Tears sprang to her eyes. “Caleb, you’re okay!”
He nodded, flinching.
He isn’t fine.
“Put me down. Go for help.”
“No,” he said the word and started walking, his gazed fixed ahead.
She studied him. His golden skin had never looked so pale beneath the splatters of crimson blood. Every part of him was oddly warm as blood soaked into her side. All she could hope was that most of it was from their enemies, rather than him.
“You saved my life.” Her throat closed around the words. But why? Why had he endured such awful things for me?
She wanted to ask him, but the question simply stuck inside her head. All I can do now is make sure he lives.
Chapter Thirty-Four
Caleb’s head felt heavy as he continued through the jungle. More lives. More lives taken by his choice, and his little female had been there to witness it all.
Would she fear him now?
Looking down at her pale face, their gazes met once again.
Perhaps she didn’t fear him…worse still, she likely felt he couldn’t keep her safe.
“I…” But he couldn’t find the words bleeding within his heart. “I’m sorry I didn’t protect you.”
To his surprise, his little human smirked. “You might not be able to predict the future, but your timing is damn good.”
How could she smile after all she had been through? Erin truly was incredible. A woman he’d strive to be good enough for every day of his life.
Just ahead of them, a loud siren began wailing. It took them long enough. But just as quickly as his annoyance flared, he extinguished it. None of it really mattered, except that Erin was safe.
Except for the unquestionable truth that Erin has somehow become your mate.
The idea should’ve terrified him, but it didn’t.
A soft clicking came from all around them.
“Drop her, Keltair!”
Again?
Chapter Thirty-Five
Erin glared at Dr. Wores. “Why isn’t he awake yet?”
The old man ignored her, his focus on reading the projected screen at the foot of Caleb’s bed.
She didn’t want to be annoying, but she couldn’t seem to sit still. Rising from the chair next to Caleb’s bed in the medbay, she started to pace. Outside the huge windows, the two suns were setting, painting the sky in reds and oranges. And yet as beautiful as the image was, she felt strangely detached.
This had not been a good day.
After a lengthy explanation, she’d finally gotten the security personnel to understand that Caleb was not the enemy so he could get some medical treatment. They’d found Heter’s body, and later brought in a specialized machine to pull William’s body from the quicksand. The person I considered my best friend. If this experience isn’t enough reason not to trust anyone, I don’t know what is.
Except Caleb.
She didn’t want to look at him, but she did. Lying on the bed, the white sheets pulled up over his bare chest, he looked strangely…vulnerable. She’d seen him get shot, but she’d been in too much shock to fully register what that meant. And she’d seen him get clawed and bitten, but shock had kept her from realizing how much blood he’d lost. It wasn’t until he collapsed that she’d been left wondering how he’d managed to carry her through the jungle, with not only his barely healed wounds from the attack by the head of security, but also from the laser pistol slicing through his gut, and the Darogos using him as their chew toy.
No one should have to be so strong.
“He’ll live,” the old man said, staring at her with his cloudy eyes.
She’d known he would. So why was her throat suddenly so tight? Slowly moving back to his bedside, she swept the dark hair off his forehead. “He’ll have even more scars to add to his collection.”
Dr.Wores’s stern voice startled her from her musings. “Those Keltairs are animals. If his scars are any indication, I’m shocked this boy lived through whatever the hell they did.”
“It wasn’t just the Keltairs.” Erin let her hand travel down to play at the edges of the waterproof bandages covering his chest. “Our people hurt him, too.”
After a moment of silence, the doctor spoke more gently. “I’m glad he has the love of a good girl like you. He deserves that.”
Her heart lurched. Love? Did she love him?
Her heart beat faster and her palms started to sweat.
She wanted to run from the question. But she’d been dancing around it for days.
He’s intelligent, hot…and he obviously cares for me. He’s saved me twice, been there for me when no one else has. We’re a good match, in so many ways.
But he’s a Keltair.
Does that matter? She examined her thoughts. No. It doesn’t matter at all.
She tried to calm the trembling of her hands. I do love him.
A knock at the door stilled her thoughts.
“Erin?” One of the guards stuck his head in. “Your father wants you to call him.”
She looked at Dr. Wores. “I’ll be right back. Let him know if he wakes.”
Chapter Thirty-Six
“I need to see Erin,” Caleb said, pushing away the old doctor’s hands as he sat up.
“Boy, you need to lie down. I just finished stitching up that stomach of yours, and I won’t have all my hard work destroyed.”
Caleb groaned as he threw his legs over the bed and rose unsteadily to his feet. “Where is she?”
“She went to her room. She said she’d be back shortly. Just lie down.”
He wanted to lie down, he really did. But more than that, he wanted to hold his female and make absolutely certain that she was okay. No amount of medicine or rest could soothe him the way seeing her could.
You saved her. Why isn’t she here watching over you?
He pushed the thought aside. When he saw her, he would know.
The old man’s wrinkled face was suddenly peering up at him. “All right. You can go. Already your body’s healing at a remarkable pace. I’d thought to give you more time to rest, but—”
“Thank you,” Caleb said, his gaze meeting that of the old human. Thank you for saving my life. He owed the man more than he could say.
And then, he turned and walked out of the medbay. It took him a moment to get his bearings, but then he headed for the elevators. He hit the buttons by the doors. A few seconds later, the doors slid open, onto his waiting father.
The Keltair’s gaze widened as it ran over the bandages covering his son’s cheek, shoulder, arms, and stomach. “What have these damned humans done to you?”
“Peace, Father, I am well.”
He tried not to look as unsteady as he felt as he joined the other Keltair in the elevator, hitting the button to the twelfth floor. The doors closed, trapping them inside together.
“First they falsely torture you, then they allow you to be abused by Darogos.” His voice lowered. “I was wrong to let you come here.”
“No,”
Caleb said, meeting his silvery eyes. “I’m fine.”
His father’s eyes narrowed, and he inhaled sharply. “Son…”
Caleb’s heart pounded faster. “You can return home. Your help isn’t needed.”
“Who is she?”
They stared at one another.
“I don’t know what you mean.”
His father growled. “You smell like a mated-male. And there are no other Keltairs here. I refuse to believe my only child would be so foolish.”
So it’s true. I’ve mated Erin.
But for some reason, he smiled. “I’m a man. I know what I’m doing.”
His father reached out, gripping his bare shoulder. “You are repeating my mistake. Why can’t you see that?”
Because I’m not. “Erin isn’t like Mother. We are perfectly matched, and she’s in love with me, too.”
“Bah! Most youthful mistakes can be overcome. This is a mistake that will haunt you forever.” His father’s anger was palpable, filling the small space like a heavy stench.
“I’m not making a mistake.”
The elevator doors opened, and Caleb stepped from his father’s grip and into the white hallway. Then, he turned back to face the old Keltair.
“Are you sure she loves you?” his father asked, his voice softening.
“I’m sure.”
The doors started to close, but his father caught them. “I got you a spot at the Starfire Academy on Earth. It is the second best. No one would need another reason to move you there, beyond your vicious attack at the hands of these cowards. If you leave now, if you never see her, smell her, or touch her again, you have a chance to be free.”
Caleb squeezed his hands into fists. “I don’t want to be free. I just want Erin.”
As he strode down the hall, a tiny flare of doubt burned within his heart. Erin had never specifically said she loved him. In fact, she’d gone out of her way to make it clear that their relationship was nothing more than a temporary satisfying of their sexual needs.
But I know this is more than that.
Still, to risk his heart, to give up any chance of mating with another female, he needed to know for sure.
Chapter Thirty-Seven
Erin stared at her father on the monitor, her body trembling with exhaustion. It was hard to remember the events of the past few days. She’d slept only a handful of hours since the attack on the academy just the day before, and it felt as though weeks had passed. “I’m fine.”
“Those damned guards should’ve done more than stand at your door!” He slammed his fist into his desk. “Where the hell were they through all of this?”
Her gaze went to his rumpled uniform and messy silver hair. I’m driving him crazy. She hid a smile. As much as her father liked to hide behind the mask of Fleet Admiral Stowe, underneath it all he really did care about her.
“It doesn’t really matter. It’s done.”
Her father fell back in his chair, running an angry hand through his hair. “It does matter! I’ll have their uniforms before the end of the day.”
She sighed. “I never told them they needed to follow me around. They shouldn’t have needed to—”
“Yes, because the academy should be safe!”
She drummed her fingers on her desk. “All that matters now is that I’m okay now.”
His pale green eyes fixed on hers. “I’m glad we found out that William was a traitor sooner rather than later, but this should be a warning to you. As confident as you are about your ability to judge a person’s character, even you can be wrong.”
Subtle. “So you heard about Caleb?”
He tilted his head. “What are you doing with that Keltair, Erin? Surely you could find less dangerous methods to keep me worried and awake at night?”
She frowned. “It isn’t about that.”
“Then, what’s it about?” His tone was soft, his expression unreadable.
This was the last thing she wanted to talk to her father about. But who was left that she could confide in now that William was gone? Her heart gave a useless squeeze. He was never your friend. It was all a lie. But as confidently as her brain thought the words, her heart only ached more.
“He saved my life.” The words dropped like stones.
After a moment, her father picked up the papers on his desk, his gaze skimming over them. “I read that. But I also read that you wouldn’t have been in the gardens if not for your time visiting that Keltair.”
She bit her lip. Of course he knew everything. “He’s the most incredible man I’ve ever met.”
Damn, I sound like a lovesick puppy.
Her father sighed loudly, setting the papers down. “They call it the ‘academy attraction.’ They put a group of attractive, intelligent, young people together. Everyone falls in and out of love with each other throughout the year, and then each cadet is placed on different ships, and they realize that their feelings were nothing more than a crush.”
Swallowing the lump that had formed in her throat, her brain screamed that’s exactly what this is. But her damned heart radiated a more powerful thought, one that burned through her veins: this is more than that.
“I care for him.”
They locked gazes for a long moment. But to Erin’s surprise, it wasn’t anger in her father’s eyes, but pity.
“This is my fault. I’ve treated you as an equal all your life. But I forgot, underneath all the training and your incredible intellect, you’re really just a girl. And girls have crushes that overpower all logic.”
She glared. “I bet I look small from that high horse you’re riding.”
He snorted, a sound that was half laugh, half angry. “I’m just saying I thought you were having difficulty balancing your work at the academy and your Dream Jumping. But the truth is, you’re having difficulty balancing your responsibilities and your new crush.”
“That’s not true.” She crossed her arms.
A battle of wits with my father is not what I need right now. After the day I’ve had, I’m basically fighting this battle with a broken sword. Her head gave a throb, as if to confirm that she was indeed one step away from curling up into a ball and letting her father win their argument, out of sheer exhaustion.
“Why did you miss your class earlier today?”
Shit. Of course he had to know that, too. “It won’t happen again.”
“Erin.” He steepled his fingers on the desk in front of him. “I’m going to be blunt with you, because, frankly, I think it’s the only chance I have at getting through to you. You know I was against you attending Starfire Academy in the first place. But now you’re there, and you need to succeed. For yourself, if not for me and our family name. If what you and this Keltair have is real, then you should be able to take a step back from him, to gain some clarity, and decide if pursuing this relationship is worth the risk to your future career. But if you just want to stay in a hormone-induced, bubbly, love cloud, that’s fine. Just don’t kid yourself about what you might lose as a result of the wrong choice.”
Like Mother. Her head felt light. Am I really going to follow in her footsteps?
Everything I feel for him seems so real, like nothing I’ve experienced before. Just the thought of his face has everything inside of me warming. This is more than attraction—it’s love. But what price am I willing to pay for it?
“Do whatever you wish, Erin.” She looked up as he pushed aside the pile of papers in front of him and picked up another, his gaze running over them as he continued speaking, half-distracted. “I had finally begun to accept that all the sacrifices we’ve made in order for you to attend the Starfire Academy were worth it. But one of my abilities as a leader is to adjust my perspective. If you want to just have some fun there, God knows you deserve to act like a normal young adult. You don’t have to achieve the impossible. You entered the academy knowing more than most of the crews I’ve encountered. Whatever you do, you’ll do well at any ship you work on.”
She was shock
ed by his words, and hurt blossomed in her chest. “I can have Caleb and be the captain of a Level 10 ship.”
He raised a brow, glancing up from the papers. “Can you? Only a handful of women have, and that was through dedicating their lives to the pursuit of their careers. But who am I to doubt you? Now, I have other things to attend to. Enjoy your time at the academy.”
“I won’t,” she spit out. “I’m here to work hard.”
“Uh-huh,” he said, reaching for the button on his screen. “Oh, and your personal guards will arrive in the morning. They’ll be following you every second for the remainder of your time at the academy. And, by the end of the month, there’ll be a new dean, and a new security staff, handpicked by me.”
“Father—” Erin didn’t give a damn about the security. She didn’t want her father to change his perspective of her.
“Good luck,” he said, and the disappointment in his eyes burned before he clicked the screen, and it went black.
Erin sat back in her chair, stunned. Her father had lost all respect for her. She could feel it like a bullet buried beneath her flesh. What was worse, though, was that she was disappointed in herself. How could she risk everything she’d worked her whole life for, for one man? Well, not a man, an alien. For Caleb.
Because he loves you, and you love him. Because he saved your life.
But where was the future in that? At the end of the day, love wouldn’t make her the captain of a Level 10 spaceship. And she was terrified of making the biggest mistake of her life.
I need to take a step back from Caleb. She needed to put up a wall between them until she could fasten the lock on her emotions and approach what they had from a logical point of view.
But convincing Caleb of that might be hard.
It didn’t matter what she had to say or do. She was drowning in her doubt, and she couldn’t allow the Keltair to make this decision for her.
Even if taking a step back from him will hurt him.
A tiny voice whispered a terrible thought, or if it might mean you’ll lose him forever.