by Susan Stoker
“Nibble on those too. The sugar will go a long way toward making you feel better. Finish up that entire cup of water, then refill it.” Brain knew he was being highhanded, but he hated seeing her this way. He walked around the counter and once more took hold of her elbow. “Come on, grab your water, I’ll get the fruit. You’ll be more comfortable on the couch while you wait for me.”
Aspen sighed, but she nodded and got up. They walked over to his couch, and Brain hovered over her as she sat. He grabbed his remote control and briefly went over which buttons did what.
“Go, Kane. I’m fine.”
He wanted to argue. Tell her she wasn’t fine, and that he wasn’t happy someone hadn’t noticed her physical state. Yes, she was an adult, and a medic, and should’ve taken care of herself, but he still didn’t like that she was in rough shape. He finally nodded and headed back outside. If he stayed with her, he’d probably say something he’d regret later.
He knew Aspen’s platoon had been training hard. Rumor had it the Rangers would be heading over to Afghanistan soon. He hated that, but understood it was part of her job, just as deploying was part of his.
But he definitely didn’t like that her platoon sergeants and officers in charge of her unit weren’t taking care of their soldiers. Yes, they needed to acclimate to the heat, as Afghanistan didn’t exactly have a temperate climate, but running their soldiers ragged wasn’t smart.
And Brain hated to admit it, but the fact that Aspen was a woman was at the forefront of his mind as well. It was obvious she was tough enough to make it through Ranger training and the combat medics course, but she was still physically weaker than most men. She wouldn’t want to hear him say that though, so his best course of action was to retreat until he could get his anger under control.
He wanted to talk to Trigger and see if he could put a bug in someone’s ear about what was going on with the Ranger units. He didn’t like to interfere, but if Aspen was on the verge of heat exhaustion, the men she worked with probably were too. And that was dangerous and stupid on the parts of the officers.
Brain wasn’t sure he was any calmer by the time he’d finished mowing Winnie’s lawn, but the twenty minutes of resting and getting some fluids had hopefully helped regulate Aspen’s body.
He waved at Winnie, who was watching from inside her house. Brain had to grin at the enthusiastic way she waved back. She’d admitted to him once that while she might be over three times his age, that didn’t mean she didn’t like ogling him.
His mind quickly turned back to Aspen as he went inside and headed for the living room, where he’d left her. He’d expected to see her sitting on the couch, but instead she was standing at the sliding glass doors that led outside. He’d thought about fencing in his yard, but hadn’t gotten around to it yet. Besides, it was easier to look over at Winnie’s house to check on her without a fence.
Brain glanced at the cup of water and noticed that it was mostly full. She must’ve finished the first cup and refilled it. The bowl of fruit was half eaten as well. “Aspen?”
She turned, and he could see from the way her shoulders slumped and the dark circles under her eyes that their plans for the night had changed. He walked over to her and held out his hand. She immediately reached out and grabbed hold of him. Without a word, he turned and walked toward the stairs, grabbing her cup of water as he went by.
His house wasn’t huge, only about fifteen hundred square feet, but he’d done some remodeling on his master bedroom and it was his favorite room in the house. She followed him without protest. He opened his bedroom door, and she still didn’t say a word. He towed her over to his bed and gestured for her to sit. She did, then looked up at him.
Brain put her cup on the small table next to the bed and went over to the leather chair in the corner. He had a quilt lying over it that he’d bought a few years ago. He’d seen it in a store, and imagined it was like something a mom or grandmother would make. He couldn’t resist buying it. Sometimes when he couldn’t sleep, he’d sit in the chair and cover himself with the quilt and try to think about the good things in his life, rather than the ugly memories that occasionally kept him awake.
He brought the quilt back to the bed. “Lay down, tesoro.”
At the questioning tilt of her head, he smiled. “Italian. Lay down.”
She did without question, which told Brain how tired she really was. He leaned over and removed her sneakers, then covered her up with the blanket, tucking it around her. “I’m gonna shower. Just rest, Aspen.”
“I’m okay, Kane,” she told him.
“I know you are,” he lied.
“I feel better after drinking all that water and eating the fruit.”
“Good.”
She eyed him sleepily for a long moment. “You’re really good-looking.”
Brain chuckled. “Thanks?”
“Seriously. When I’m ninety years old, I want someone like you to mow my grass in nothing but a pair of shorts too.”
Still smiling, Brain leaned over and kissed her temple. “Rest, Aspen.”
“’Kay. Kane?”
He’d just started heading for the bathroom, but at the sound of his name on her lips, he turned back. “Yeah?”
“Why are men such assholes?”
Every muscle in his body clenched, but he forced himself to sound as calm as possible. “We’re not all assholes.”
She sighed. “I know. But the assholes sometimes block out everyone else.”
Brain couldn’t help himself. He walked back to the bed and sat. Aspen was on her side with her legs curled up, and he leaned over her, putting a hand on either side of her shoulders. “I wish I could tell you I’ve never been a dick, but I’d be lying. When I first joined the Army, I didn’t think women should be in combat units. I wasn’t sure they should be flying helicopters in hostile territory either. Not because I didn’t think they were strong enough, but because it just seemed inherently wrong for them to be putting themselves in danger. Over the years, I’ve come to see the error in my thinking.”
“How?”
“It started when a woman saved my life. And the lives of my teammates, as well. We were pinned down in a town in Africa. I can’t say where or what was going on, but suffice it to say, we were fucked. The more time that went by, the worse the situation got. People appeared out of nowhere with more and more weapons, and it was only a matter of time before we’d be overrun. There were only seven of us against hundreds of townspeople who weren’t happy we were there.”
Aspen’s eyes widened. “What happened? How’d you get out of there?”
“A helicopter screamed in from the west. One second we were on our own, and the next, the most beautiful sound we’d ever heard reached our ears. The pilot flew like no one I’d ever seen before. Skimming the tops of the buildings, scaring the shit out of the people. That chopper landed in the middle of a neighborhood with—I swear I’m not lying—about one foot of clearance on either side of the blades. The door opened, and the seven of us all leaped in. We were lying in a tangle of arms and legs but the pilot didn’t wait for the door to shut. She’d seen someone holding an RPG pointing right at us.”
“She?”
“Yeah. She. The guys in the back were attempting to shut the door, and my team was useless because we were all tangled in a heap. The pilot raised the chopper, turned it, and using her left hand, aimed a pistol out the small window next to her and shot the guy holding the rocket launcher right between the eyes. He fell back, and she calmly put down her pistol, grabbed the controls, and got us the hell out of there. I swear to God she didn’t even break a sweat.
“When we landed—I’ll never forget this—she turned to us, grinned, and said, ‘That was fun.’ I’ve been close to death several times over my career, but that was the closest call I’ve had. And that pilot thought it was ‘fun.’” Brain shook his head in disbelief.
“Do you know where she is now?” Aspen asked.
“She’s working for a commerc
ial airline. Probably making damn good money, but most likely bored out of her mind,” Brain told her. “I’m sorry the guys you’re working with can’t see what an asset you are to them.”
“It’s not all of them,” Aspen admitted.
“Derek,” Brain said from between clenched teeth.
“He’s always been hard on the teams. I guess I must have excused his behavior before going out with him because I was enamored of his good looks or something. But now that he thinks I dissed him, he’s really making our lives miserable.”
“You should say something,” Brain suggested.
“To who?” Aspen asked. She didn’t sound mad, just defeated, which angered Brain. “I have no proof it’s because of me. You can’t know what it’s like being a woman in the special forces. And I know I’m not a real Ranger but—”
“Don’t,” Brain interrupted. “Don’t belittle yourself. You are a real Ranger. You might not wear the Ranger tab on your uniform, but you’re right there alongside them on missions. You go through the same shit they do. You’ve been through the training.”
“You’re right,” Aspen said a little more confidently. “Anyway, I can’t tell on Derek as if we’re on the playground or something. Shut up and follow orders is the name of the game. I’ll be looked at as if I just can’t hack it. It’s not worth the trouble I’ll have to go through. It’s easier to just endure his bullshit.”
Brain wanted to protest. Wanted to tell her she should go to the major in her unit and let him know what was going on, but he knew she was right. The first thing someone would think was that she was complaining because she couldn’t handle the training. And that pissed him off.
“I’m okay,” Aspen told him softly.
“You want to talk about today? This week?” Brain asked.
“Yeah, but not right this second. You need to shower. You stink.” She grinned. “And I’m hungry.”
Brain smiled. He liked that she wasn’t shutting him out. She might not want to talk right this second, but she would. It was enough. “Okay, tesoro. Rest your eyeballs while I shower.”
“Rest my eyeballs,” she said with a small laugh. “I don’t think I’ve heard that saying before.”
“My mom used to tell me that when I stayed up too late studying. She’d come into my room and tell me it was time to rest my eyeballs, that the math would be there in the morning for me to study.”
Aspen smiled at his memory.
“Are you really okay?” he asked softly.
For the first time since she’d arrived, some of the tension around her mouth eased and she nodded. “I am now.”
“Good.”
“Kane?”
He shook his head in exasperation. “I’m never gonna get clean if you keep asking me shit,” he told her.
Her lips twitched, but she went on. “I’m sorry to be a downer. I’ve been looking forward to seeing you again since you dropped me off at my apartment last time.”
Something inside Brain settled. He felt as if he’d known Aspen for ages. They hadn’t kissed, except for that first time at the bar, but he knew her better than most of the women he’d dated over the years. Talking on the phone had forced them to get to know each other without a physical attraction getting in the way. “Me too. And you’re not a downer. Tonight was always going to be about relaxing.”
“Me sleeping in your bed probably wasn’t what you had planned,” she said.
Brain couldn’t help it, he raised an eyebrow suggestively.
Aspen giggled. “Okay, maybe it was.”
“It wasn’t. Seriously. I’m enjoying getting to know you, Aspen. The good and the bad. Relationships aren’t always sunshine and roses, and I never want you to think that you can’t share your true feelings, whatever they are. If you’re pissed, be pissed. If you’re upset, be upset. If you’re happy, be happy. Got it?”
“Got it,” she said. “Is it all right if I take a short nap while you’re showering?”
“Of course.”
“It’s just that I haven’t been sleeping well, and today was hard.”
Brain put his finger over her lips. “You don’t have to explain to me. I’m honored you trust me enough to let down your guard and sleep.”
“You don’t scare me, Kane.”
He knew she was teasing, but he wasn’t when he said, “Good.” Then he leaned down and kissed her temple once more and stood. He headed for the bathroom without looking back. He knew if he did, he might not leave her side again.
Ten minutes later, Brain was showered and had put on a pair of sweats and a T-shirt. His feet were bare and he hadn’t bothered to shave or brush his hair. He wanted Aspen to feel as comfortable as possible, and he figured if he looked comfy, she might relax even more.
When he walked out of his bathroom, he stopped in his tracks when he looked at his bed.
Aspen was curled up under his quilt…and he’d never seen anything so beautiful in his life. Her cheeks were flushed, which he was glad for after seeing her so pale earlier. He had a sudden urge to join her on the bed, but forced his feet to move toward the door. She probably wanted him to wake her up when he was done with the shower, but there was no way in hell he was doing that. If she needed to spend the entire evening sleeping, then that’s what he’d let her do.
They’d have other evenings together. Brain knew better than most how being tired could suck the life out of you. She’d been working her ass off for the last few weeks to get ready for the possibility of deploying to Afghanistan with her platoon. He was more than happy to let her sleep.
He shut the bedroom door almost all the way, leaving it open a few inches, then he made his way downstairs. Aspen had said she was hungry, so he’d make something that could easily be warmed up whenever she woke. He could still use the meat he’d bought, but not as a typical steak.
Two hours later, the green chili stew he’d thrown together was simmering in the Crock-Pot and he was sitting on his couch with his feet on the coffee table in front of him, watching a football game on his big-screen TV. The sound was turned down low and he was nursing a glass of wine he’d poured himself an hour ago.
He heard something behind him and turned to see Aspen standing at the bottom of his stairs. She had his quilt around her shoulders and her hair was flattened on one side. She had the cup of water in her hand and her eyes were glazed over; she looked as though she was sleepwalking.
He immediately stood and held out an arm. “Come ’ere, chérie.”
“French,” she mumbled as she walked toward him. “I know that one.”
He grabbed the cup from her and put his arm around her shoulders and hugged her as she arrived at his side. Surprisingly, she turned and leaned into his chest, giving him her weight. Brain put his arms around her waist and held her as she burrowed her nose into his neck. Because of their similar heights, she fit against him perfectly.
“Feel better?” he asked.
She shook her head. “No. I’ve never been a napper. I wake up more tired than I was when I laid down.”
“And grumpier too,” he joked.
She simply snorted.
“Hungry?” he asked.
She shook her head, but said, “Yes.”
Brain couldn’t help it, he chuckled again. “Right. How about you sit while I dish you up some soup.”
Aspen lifted her head and took a deep breath. “It smells amazing.”
Brain shrugged. “It’s nothing fancy. Green chili stew. I still grilled the steaks I bought then cut them up for the soup. Threw in some canned tomatoes and green chilies. Some beef broth, water, and some carrots rounding it out. It’s simple but filling. And it’ll clear out your sinuses,” he warned. “I figured after you ate that hot salsa when we went out the other night that you could handle it.”
“I can handle it,” Aspen echoed, looking him in the eye.
Brain wanted to kiss her right then and there, but he forced himself to let go and take a step back. “I’ll get you more water too,
” he told her, holding up the cup he still had in his hand. “Getting overheated and exhausted isn’t anything to mess with.”
“I know. And thank you,” she told him as she sat, pulling the quilt closer around her as she did so.
Brain dished up their meal and returned to her side within minutes. They ate without talking, watching the game on TV and enjoying the simple fare. After she finished, Brain asked if she wanted more.
“No, I’m good,” Aspen said. “Thank you. It was delicious.”
“Any time,” Brain responded, reaching for her bowl. Before heading into the kitchen to put their dishes in the sink, he picked up her cup of water and handed it to her without a word.
Aspen chuckled and dutifully took a sip. “Bossy,” she muttered under her breath.
Brain smiled. It wasn’t that he was bossy, he just wanted to take care of her. He wasn’t sure she’d had much pampering recently, and he was happy to oblige.
He returned to his small living area and sat next to Aspen. She immediately turned and leaned into him. Brain lifted his arm and put it around her shoulders as she snuggled into his side. He was happy to sit there all night without saying a word. He was that comfortable around Aspen. He wasn’t going to force her to talk about what had happened that day to make her show up looking completely exhausted and out of sorts. If she wanted to share, he’d listen. Otherwise, he’d just be there for her.
Aspen felt a hundred times better than she had when she’d shown up on Kane’s doorstep, which was telling, since she still felt like shit. She’d known she was dehydrated and on the verge of collapse, and the two-hour nap she’d taken in Kane’s bed, surrounded by the smell of clean cotton sheets—and Kane himself—had been the best sleep she’d gotten in a week.
Ever since they’d begun their training for whatever hell awaited them in Afghanistan, her sergeant and Derek, who was in charge of the other platoon, had pushed them almost beyond their limits. It was more than obvious they’d be heading across the world soon, but of course they didn’t have any real details about what they’d be doing yet. So they were training for the worst.