by Joss Wood
Nobody understood that fear kept her sane, that standing apart from people gave her some measure of control, a tiny barrier to deflect the hard wallop of people dying, leaving, moving away...changing.
Sage heard the first bars of her ringtone and looked at the screen of her phone and hesitated. She should answer Tyce’s call but fear and frustration kept her hands firmly in the pockets of her jeans. She ran her hands over her face as a wave of guilt crashed over her. She’d promised to call him but she was still digesting him and their situation, desperately hoping that her fairy godmother would creep into her loft and wave a wand and make sense of her life. It would be easier if she knew what she wanted from Tyce, how she wanted to raise this child, how to start a conversation with him.
The problem was that every time she laid eyes on him, her brain shut down and her body started to thrum. Desire coursed through her and skin prickled and her stomach quivered. She wanted to make love to him again, to explore the angles and ridges of his muscled body and hear him moan with need for her. She imagined his fingers on her, in her, his mouth licking its way down her body, testing her, tasting her, filling her...
Sage placed the palm of her hand against her forehead. Tyce was an alpha male, possibly the most alpha male she’d ever met. He was ridiculously fit and almost overwhelmingly male and thoughts of him made her womb throb and her lady parts tingle.
Okay, this was ridiculous; she was burning up from the inside out. There had to be an explanation for why she was feeling a hundred times hornier than usual...
Tyce was ludicrously good-looking and phenomenally talented at getting her off, but even when she was younger, she’d never felt so on edge, so aware of her libido. Usually when she was stressed—and the events of the past few weeks were enough to stress out a sloth—her libido took a dive.
Her horniness could be pregnancy hormones, she decided and, almost immediately, cursed herself for lying to herself. It was all Tyce, only Tyce. God, maybe she needed a cold shower.
Sage looked out her windows at the dingy day. Or maybe a walk in fresh air would do the trick. Although it was snowing, a brisk walk would clear her mind and work out some of the tension in her body. Making up her mind, Sage headed to her front door, pulling on flat, warm boots and a thick coat. She placed a floppy burgundy hat over her messy hair and wound a scarf around her neck. Her gloves were in her pocket and with her front door key, her phone and a little cash, she headed downstairs.
It was colder than she’d thought. Sinking her chin into her scarf, she pulled on her gloves and started to walk. In summer the trees were leafy and the cafés scattered chairs and tables on the sidewalk but on a bitter winter afternoon, with snow falling, the residents of this neighborhood were either in Florida, at work or tucked up in their apartments. Only fools and the insane walked the streets in a biting wind. She wouldn’t last long, Sage thought; she’d walk a block or two to clear her head and when she returned to her apartment she could justify a decadent cup of hot chocolate. Damn, it was slippery, she thought when her feet skidded across a patch of ice. Maybe this wasn’t such a great idea.
Turning back to her apartment building, Sage saw a tall figure approach her front door and frowned, thinking that his height and build reminded her of Tyce. When he walked up the steps and jabbed his finger on her button she recognized his profile, the odd snowflake settling on his black hair. Tyce was leaning on her bell, waiting for her to buzz him in. Impatient man, Sage thought, stepping from the road onto the sidewalk.
Because her eyes were on Tyce, she didn’t notice the patch of ice and her right foot skidded out from under her. Her left foot followed suit and then she was freewheeling her arms, trying to keep her balance. Can’t fall, she thought, she had to protect her baby. She tried to break her fall and her hand slammed down on the pavement and she heard the distinctive crack.
The pain in her coccyx hit her first, the sharp sting rocketing up her spine. Not wanting to be outdone, her wrist radiated short, sharp bursts of agony, causing dots to appear behind her eyes and her breath to catch in her throat.
Sage knew she didn’t call out to Tyce—she had no breath to speak let alone to yell—but by some miracle he appeared and dropped to his knees next to her. “Crap! Sage, are you okay? What the hell happened?”
Sage, still looking for air and fighting pain, couldn’t reply.
Tyce’s hand on her cheek anchored her and his deep, calm voice steadied her. “Okay, honey, just breathe. Slowly. In and out.”
Sage concentrated on getting air into her lungs, vaguely aware that Tyce held a phone to his ear, his eyes locked on hers. She heard something about an ambulance, that they should hurry. Sage tried to wave his concerns away; she would be okay; she just needed a minute.
And, she thought, a new coccyx and a new wrist. Then she would be fine.
“Yeah and she’s pregnant, about four months,” Tyce said. “Breathe, dammit.”
Okay, that statement was directed at her. Sage pulled in some more air and felt the light-headedness pass and the pain increase. She was also, she realized, lying flat on her back and every inch of her body was freezing, except for her butt and her wrist, both of which were on fire.
Tyce pushed his phone back into the inside pocket of his jacket and pushed a strand of hair out of her eyes.
“I need to sit up,” Sage rasped. “I’m cold.”
“They said not to move you,” Tyce replied, his hand covering her stomach.
“I’m freezing, Tyce.” Sage heard the distant wail of ambulance sirens and wrinkled her nose. “That for me?”
Tyce looked up and nodded. “Yep.”
“I’m sure that’s not necessary.”
“What wasn’t necessary was you going out on a freezing day and endangering yourself,” Tyce growled as the ambulance pulled up beside them.
“I needed air,” Sage protested.
“Then open a damned window!” he retorted as EMTs approached them.
“We’re going to need you to stand back, sir.”
Tyce stood at the young female EMT’s command and Sage noticed that his jeans were soaked from the knees down. That meant, she supposed, that she was wet from tip to toe. Wet and cold. “Any cramping? Any signs that you might be bleeding?” the EMT asked her as he pointed a penlight at her eyes.
“Nope,” Sage replied. “I bounced off my butt. Look, my apartment is right over there—if someone can help me up, then I’ll go on upstairs and I’ll be fine.”
The EMT looked up and Sage saw him exchange a look with Tyce. “I strongly suggest that, because you are pregnant and because you are cradling your hand like a baby, you go to hospital.” Sage nodded, sighed and looked at her front door, so near but so far away. She really, really needed that cup of hot chocolate.
* * *
“They x-rayed my wrist and I have a greenstick fracture, which is why I have this stupid cast.”
“Are you allowed to have X-rays when you’re pregnant?”
Tyce heard Linc’s question and quickly realized that Sage was talking to her brother via speakerphone and waited to hear her answer. Stopping, he stood to the side of the partially open door to her hospital room and put his back to the wall, holding a small bag containing dry clothes and shoes. Luckily the hospital wasn’t far from her apartment and Sage had handed over the key so that he could collect clothes for her to wear home.
“I checked—they said it was completely safe,” Sage said, sounding bone-deep weary. Tyce ran a hand over his eyes, the image of her feet flipping up and her butt hitting the pavement with a loud thump playing over and over in his head. Okay, she hadn’t been knocked by a car but she’d landed hard and he kept expecting to see blood soaking through her jeans.
Tyce felt his stomach lurch into his throat at the thought. Up until a few hours ago he’d understood Sage’s pregnancy on a purely intellectual basis: his sperm, her egg, a
baby later in the year. But when she fell, he felt bombarded with fear. How badly was she hurt? How could he fix her? What could he do? What if she lost this baby? How would she feel?
How would he feel?
Lousy, he decided. Sage’s baby, he realized, their baby, wasn’t something he wanted to wish away.
When had that happened? And how?
“Are you sure you don’t want me to come down? I can be there in about a half hour,” Linc said.
Tyce held his breath, waiting for her answer.
“I’m sure Tyce will see me home. He was with me when I fell.”
“Then he did a piss-poor job of catching you,” Linc grumbled.
“He was at my door and I was stepping onto the pavement. He’s not Superman, Linc.”
Silence fell between the siblings and Tyce straightened, prepared to enter the room again. He stopped when Linc spoke again. “If your right wrist is in a cast and if walking causes you pain, then you can’t stay on your own.”
Linc was right, Tyce thought. Sage needed help for a while and maybe he should be the one to offer to stay with her. Sure, living with her and not making love to her was going to be hellfire difficult but the reality was that they couldn’t keep circling round each other. At some point they had to start dealing with each other. And it would be better for the baby if they managed to establish some sort of a relationship—hopefully something that resembled a friendship—before their child dropped into the world and their lives.
Tyce fully accepted that he was a loner, that he didn’t need people but he was connected to his child and through that little person to Sage. He doubted he could give the child what he or she needed but, along with offering whatever financial support he could to Sage, he was prepared to try to be a dad. That way, he could look himself in the eye and say that he’d tried to be the best father he could. Part of this new role was looking after his child’s mother. And if that meant moving in with her and helping out while she was injured, that was what he intended to do.
Seven
“Let me talk to the brothers and we’ll draw up a roster so that one of us will stay with you until you can manage on your own,” Linc replied.
“I’m not a hundred and three, Linc! I don’t need anyone to stay with me. You know I hate having people in my space.”
Tough, Tyce thought, despite the little spurt of sympathy he felt for her. He didn’t like people in his space either but she’d just have to suck it up and deal.
“I’ll stay with you tonight—”
That was his cue, Tyce thought. Nobody was staying with her but him. He walked into the room, dumped her clothes on the foot of her bed and walked around the bed to look down at Sage’s phone into Linc’s worried face. Taking it from her hand, he ignored Sage’s annoyed “Hey!”
“Forget the roster, Linc. I’ll be staying with her.”
“Latimore,” Linc said, his eyes and tone cool. “Is that what Sage wants?”
Judging by her annoyed and fractious expression, Sage would rather have a mutant cockroach move in but he didn’t care. He was looking after Sage so that she could look after their baby.
And maybe you’re also doing this because you need to know that she is okay on a day-by-day, minute-by-minute basis? Tyce ignored the errant thought. He looked at Sage, who was squawking her displeasure.
“Pipe down, Sage. It’s a done deal, Linc,” Tyce said before disconnecting the call.
Her eyes hazy with pain, Sage tried to skewer him with a look. “You are not coming home with me and you are not moving in!”
Tyce jammed his hands into the back pockets of his jeans, conscious that the bottom half of his jeans was still damp from kneeling on the sidewalk beside her. He opened his mouth to argue with her and then noticed her pale face and pain-filled eyes. Dammit, he hated knowing that she was in pain and that there was nothing he could do about it.
Arguing with her was a waste of energy: he was taking her home and he was temporarily, very temporarily, moving in. As he’d told Linc, it was a done deal.
Placing both hands on the bed on either side of her hips, he looked into her face. “No BS. How, exactly, are you feeling?”
Sage opened her mouth, shut it again and the heat of her sigh caressed his chin. “The baby is fine. I’m not at risk of miscarrying if that’s what you are worried about,” she said in a quiet voice.
She had no idea that he wasn’t half as concerned about the baby as he was about her. The baby had its own custom-made airbag; Sage hadn’t had anything between her and the cold, hard sidewalk.
“Sage...” Tyce used his knuckle to lift her face up, waiting until their eyes connected again before he spoke. “I know that but I want to know how you are feeling.”
“My wrist is sore but bearable, but my tailbone is excruciating. It hurts to sit.”
Tyce had to touch her so he cupped the side of her face. “Have you had some pain meds?”
“Just acetaminophen. They also gave me some cream to help with the bruising.” She looked at her wrist, closed her eyes and sighed. “That’s not something I’m going to able to manage myself.”
Tyce laid his lips on her forehead, holding the kiss there for longer than necessary. She’s okay, he reminded himself as panic clawed up his throat. She’s okay...and the baby is okay... Breathe. When the unfamiliar wave of, God, emotion passed—yeah, Sage’s superpower was to turn him to mush—Tyce pulled back and dragged a smile onto his face. “I happen to like your butt and I have no problem touching it, with cream and without.”
As he hoped, Sage rolled her eyes and amusement touched her lips. She picked up her phone from the side table and sent Tyce an uncertain look. “Are you sure you want to look after me for a couple of days? Wouldn’t it be easier if my family took turns to help me out?”
Tyce straightened. “Probably. The thing is, Sage, you and I need some time to talk, to get to know each other again. We didn’t spend that much time talking three years ago.”
She blushed and Tyce knew that she was remembering the hours, days they spent in bed...not talking. “In less than half a year,” he added, “we’ll have this child and it will be affected by everything we do, from how we talk to each other, treat each other, interact with each other. I genuinely believe that we have to try to find a sensible way of dealing with each other.”
“And you think that way is to move in with me and rub cream on my butt?” Sage asked, skeptical.
“If I move in for a few days, we’ll have time to talk, to figure out a way forward, to talk about this baby and how it will change our lives. We can discuss your expectations, my expectations, how we’re going to tackle this.” Tyce pushed his hands into his hair, frustrated. The adults in his life had lurched from crisis to crisis, had been reactive rather than proactive. By moving in with her, she couldn’t avoid him and he’d be able to find out what type of father Sage wanted him to be and whether he could live up to her expectations.
They could build something small but meaningful between them, some type of relationship that would help them to co-parent their child effectively. Yeah, it meant him stepping out of his comfort zone, opening up a little, but his child deserved his best effort. Tyce sucked in a deep breath. They needed a plan and with one in place, there was less chance they’d go off script and venture into unknown, scary, emotional territory. “Am I making any sense?”
Sage wrinkled her nose. “Unfortunately, yes.”
“Your enthusiasm is underwhelming,” Tyce stated, his voice dry.
Sage tried to swing her legs off the bed and groaned. She closed her eyes and Tyce’s heart contracted at her low whimper. “Dammit, that hurts.”
Thinking that the easiest way to get her onto her feet was to lift her, Tyce slid one arm around her back, the other under her knees, and easily lifted her into his arms. Backing away from the bed, he looked down into her lovely
face. “Okay?”
“Yeah.” Sage curled her hand around his neck and lust skittered down his spine. “I’m okay. You can put me down.”
“I’ll keep my hands on you so that you don’t fall,” Tyce told her, keeping his voice steady and calm. After Sage was on her feet, he held her elbows and checked her face for pain. Seeing that she was coping, he leaned back and snagged the bag of clothes from the bed. He’d wanted, desperately, to remove her clothes but not like this. He’d intended to kiss every inch of her skin as he undressed her, inhale her scent, drive her crazy.
Sage’s eyes slammed into his and, despite her pain, he saw the flash of awareness, heard her quick intake of breath. He couldn’t help noticing that the gap between her thighs widened, that she’d subconsciously arched her back, a silent signal that desire bubbled under her pain.
He had to be the better person here... Sage was injured and he was sex deprived. But it would help if she stopped looking at him like he was a piece of fine Belgian chocolate that she couldn’t wait to sample.
“Stop looking at me like that,” he grumbled.
“Like what?” Sage asked, her face flushing.
“Like you want me to get you naked,” Tyce snapped. “You’re injured and I need to get some dry clothes on you. I shouldn’t be thinking about how it feels to hold you naked, up close and against me.”
Sage pulled her plump bottom lip between her teeth. “Are we ever going to get past this, Tyce?”
“Me wanting you?” Tyce clarified.
“And me wanting you.” Sage rubbed her eye socket with the ball of her hand. “We keep telling ourselves that we can ignore this heat between us but it’s constantly there, like the proverbial elephant in the room.”
Nailed it, Tyce thought. Forcing his big brain to think, he pulled out her clothes from the bag. “We have so much else to deal with that I think we should keep our lives as simple as possible. Sex always adds a layer of complication.”