by Todd, E. L.
Lover’s Roulette
This is a work of fiction. All the characters and events portrayed in this novel are fictitious or used fictitiously. All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the publisher or author, except in the case of a reviewer, who may quote brief passages in a review.
Copyright © 2013 by E. L. Todd
Fallen Publishing
All Rights Reserved
ISBN-13: 978-1492954903
ISBN-10: 149295490X
Lover’s Roulette
Book Six of the Forever and Always Series
E. L. Todd
1
Scarlet
“Why do you always have to pack everything you own?” Sean asked as he looked at all my suitcases scattered across the floor. “It’s just the weekend—not a whole week.”
“You never know.”
He raised an eyebrow. “Never know what? That our flight might be delayed so we have to stay there for an extra day? Yeah, good thing you packed for such an emergency.”
I rolled my eyes. “It’s better to be prepared than not be prepared. This is my bachelorette party. I want to make sure I have everything.”
Sean grabbed the handle of my suitcase and lifted it. Alarm splashed across his face. “Is Ryan in here?”
I laughed. “Stop picking on me.”
“As your fiancé, it’s in my nature.”
“No, it’s in Ryan’s nature. You’re supposed to treat me like I’m a goddess.”
His eyes softened and he returned the suitcase to the floor. He came closer to me, making my heart beat sporadically like it always did when he was near. His blue eyes shined bright, taking in my every curve and angle. When his gaze landed on my eyes, I saw the love and devotion pulsing, which made me weak.
His hands wrapped around my waist, feeling the skin of my hips under my shirt. His palms were big enough to span my waist, making me feel small and fragile. I always had to be strong my entire life, but Sean made me realize it was okay to be scared and weak. He would take care of me.
He pulled me closer to him while he stared at me, pressing his forehead against mine. “You’re right. But you aren’t a goddess. To me, you’re so much more than that.”
I smiled, liking the direction of this conversation. “So I can pack whatever I want?”
He sighed. “You could stab me with a knife and I would help you do it.” He rubbed his nose against mine then his eyes lost their light. I could see the depression, fear, and anxiety surge through.
“Babe, stop thinking about it.”
“You can read my mind.”
“No, I can read your heart.”
He sighed. “It just scares the shit out of me.”
“Nothing happened.”
He said nothing, not seeming assuaged at all.
Even though everything with Carl was behind us, he still stressed over it, afraid that something might happen to me. He was protective before, but now he was insane about it. I never went anywhere by myself unless someone was with me. I still went to the grocery store, shopping, and running errands when he wasn’t around, but I never told him about it so he wouldn’t have a panic attack. I knew this behavior would disappear with time. “Are you excited about the trip?” I tried to change the subject, wanting the pain on his face to go away.
“Yeah. I was dreading it when it was just the guys, but now I’m looking forward to it.”
“You don’t think it’s lame that your fiancé is coming along?”
“Not at all. I want you there.”
“You’re so pussy-whipped.”
He chuckled. “I’m so obsessed with you that you could boss me around like a dog. Anything command you make, I’ll follow. I’m totally hooked on you to the point where I’m a stupid idiot. I’m totally wrapped around your finger. You tell me to jump, and I will.”
“I like this power.”
“Just don’t abuse it.”
“Too late.”
His hands moved up my back, feeling the area between my shoulder blades. He rubbed his fingers into the surface, making me feel relaxed and calm. “I would much rather get a lap dance from you than a dirty whore.”
“I thought I was a dirty whore?”
“You’re the queen of whores. I don’t take anything less than the best.”
“Well, I did work my way up.”
He smiled. “Seriously, Scar. I don’t want to look at anyone else for the rest of my life. If this was years ago, I would have felt differently, but now I’m nothing like that. Everywhere I go, I see your face, your smile, the engagement ring on your finger. I don’t even find women attractive anymore. They all fade away in comparison to you. It’s stupid to stare at naked chicks just because tradition claims it’s what you’re supposed to do.” He pressed his lips against my forehead, holding it there for a long time. “I love you, baby.”
My heart squeezed with warmth. It was hard to believe we were ever platonic friends, that this attraction and love didn’t stem until years after our friendship began. That hardly ever happened. Once you were friends, that was it. You were friends. “I love you too.”
“So you aren’t going to a strip club either, right?”
“Well…”
He pulled away. “Well what? You want to?”
“I don’t know what Janice and Monnique have planned. They might force me.”
“I’ll give you a much better show.”
“I know you would.”
“Why don’t you guys see Cher instead?”
I laughed. “Cher?”
“What? She plays there, right?”
“I don’t know a single song by her.”
“Now you can learn.”
“You just don’t want me to see naked men.”
“I really don’t.”
“Sean, it isn’t the same thing. To be honest, it’ll be totally gross.”
“Then don’t go.”
“We’ll see.”
He sighed.
“Are you going to hit the strip clubs if we decide to go anyway?”
“Of course not. I don’t want to see a bunch of disgusting sluts with their clothes off.”
The old Sean would never say something like that. Even if he was seeing someone, he would still go with a guilt-free conscious. He was always down for a good time. And he would sleep with any girl no matter how disgusting they were, as long as they were hot enough. “You’ve changed so much.”
“That’s because I’m madly in love.”
“You were madly in love with Penelope, but you’re still different.”
“My love for you is nothing like it ever was with her. They aren’t even comparable, Scar. If something happened to you, I would take my own life. I’m not exaggerating. I can’t live without you. You’ve made me happier than anyone ever has. I’m a completely different person because of you. I’ve never had someone love me so unconditionally, putting up with my shit repeatedly. I’m not just in love with you, but I’m indebted to you, loyal to you. I’ll spend the rest of my life trying to convince you of that.”
“You already did.”
“That’s not enough.”
I grabbed his face and directed his eyes on me. “Sean, I’ve let go of the past and moved on. Now you need to do it too. We’re spending the rest of our lives together. You can’t hold onto every mistake you’ve made.”
“My mom was so mean to you I stood by and let it happen, protecting Penelope instead of you.”
“You were trying to do that right thing and I respect that. Penelope has
a much harder road ahead of her. I knew you didn’t do it out of love, just out of compassion. Now let it go. And you did say something.”
“But I shouldn’t have let it go on for so long.”
“Sean, knock it off. Your mother was the one who chose to act that way, to treat me with absolutely no respect. Don’t put all the blame on yourself.”
He placed his hands over mine and closed his eyes. He said nothing for a long time, just feeling my fingers with his. “Okay. I will.”
“Thank you.”
He grabbed my face and kissed me, letting his wet lips linger on mine for a long time.
I pulled away. “We should get going.”
He held me to his chest. “I want to make love to you.”
“We’re already late.”
“I don’t care.” His hands ran over my body, feeling the swell of my breasts and the curve of my waist. I knew I had gained a little weight because I hadn’t been hitting the gym like I used to, but Sean didn’t seem to notice. His desire for me was as strong as ever. “Come on.”
Unable to say no, I let him drag me to our bedroom.
Sean pushed me against the wall, my back to him, and he started to kiss my neck and my shoulders. His chest was pressed against me as his lips darted across my body. He loosened my clothes then pulled them away. When I was standing in my bra and thong, he ran his tongue everywhere, tasting me.
The feel of his hands, so gentle and precise, made me shake with anticipation. When I felt his arousal, knew how much he wanted me, it made me wet. His breathing had increased and slight moans escaped his lips even though he wasn’t inside me yet. His hard cock pressed against me and I knew how much he wanted me. He made me feel sexy even though I always felt clumsy and stupid. He made me feel like I was the hottest woman he had ever been with, that every other girl had no effect on him, like I was the only woman in the world.
He pressed me into the wall, dominating me in every way. My sassiness and argumentative attitude had vanished. He totally possessed me and controlled me. He was usually this way in the bedroom, becoming the alpha that I couldn’t stop or control. But I liked it that way. He was the man that I allowed to completely devour me, taking as much of me as he wanted.
His hands ran up my ass then to my shoulders, still kissing my neck. He grabbed my left hand, feeling the engagement ring on my finger. He gripped me tightly, intertwining our fingers together.
“You’re mine forever, Scar,” he whispered into my ear.
I moaned, loving the sound of his deep voice.
He titled my face and kissed my lips, my chest still pressed against the wall. When our lips broke apart, it made a sharp noise, but that only made me more excited. I cupped the back of his neck and kissed him passionately, breathing into his mouth. We hadn’t even made it to the bed and I felt like I would come right then and there. Sean was the sexiest man I had ever been with. I never came so many times or felt as hot as I was when I was with him. And I loved him so much.
While he kissed me, he removed his clothes, letting them fall to the floor. When his bare chest touched me, I moaned again. The burn between my legs was getting to me. Now I wanted him inside me. I felt like a wolf on the hunt, the heat circulating in my veins. I felt so carnal that I wanted to howl, begging him to take me. I tried to turn around but he wouldn’t let me, pinning me to the wall.
His hand continued to grab my left one, touching the engagement ring on the finger. I imagined feeling the metal of his wedding ring next to mine and that made me shake. I couldn’t wait until he was mine forever.
His right hand moved across my skin, feeling my thighs then my stomach. He didn’t touch the area between my legs and I was getting frustrated. I wanted him so much. When I felt his hard cock against my ass, I wanted him to move inside me. When I imagined how it would feel, I felt my body tense. He continued to kiss me, touch me, and feel me, and the sensation started the explosion inside me.
I couldn’t believe it. I was coming. “Sean.”
He wouldn’t stop kissing me. His lips caressed mine, separating them with his tongue. I felt all the love he had for me with his touch alone. The combination of everything left me writhing against the wall. The pleasure radiated through, burning my flesh and my heart. My lips became immobile and I just breathed into his mouth. It was one of the most intense orgasms I ever had.
“Holy shit,” I whispered.
Sean unclasped my bra then pulled down my thong. When I felt the delicate fabric slide down my legs, I felt the moisture that accumulated there. I was so turned on that I wasn’t embarrassed by it.
Sean placed his hands on my hips then turned me around, pushing my back against the wall. He leaned into me, his hands squeezing my breasts. His forehead was pressed to mine as he explored my body. His cock was pressed against my stomach and the top was leaking. When he looked into my eyes, he didn’t say anything, but I knew what he meant. There was no way to describe how much he loved and adored me.
He grabbed my hips then picked me up. Instinctively, I wrapped my legs around him as he guided me to the edge of the bed. He laid me down, pulling my hips toward him. His lips were on mine again in a heated embrace. I was so aroused that I wanted to scream. I wanted him inside me now.
He broke our kiss then looked me in the eye. His blue eyes were bright even though it was dark in the bedroom. The anxiety and excitement was evident on his face, mixed with the love and obsession he had for me. He grabbed the shaft of his cock then placed the head inside me.
I bit my lip, loving the immediate stretch.
With one hand cupping my face and the other holding my left hand, he slid inside me slowly, making the descent heightened with pleasure. Since I already came, my body was tender and dying for his touch. His cock fit inside me perfectly, stretching me even though my body had already acclimated to his large size.
It felt so good that I didn’t know what to do. I was writhing, shaking as he started to move inside me. He hands dug into my hair as he started to thrust inside me. He grabbed my knees and lifted them further back, giving him more room. I was so drugged on his touch that he could do anything he wanted.
My eyes closed as I gasped, unable to handle how good it felt. I already felt my body bend to him, preparing to explode again.
“Look at me,” he said through his heavy breathing.
I immediately opened my eyes.
“I can’t wait to marry you.”
His words made my heart soften and skip a beat at the same time. My body lost all function and control, and I came for him, gripping his back and his neck as the sensation rocked through me and made my clitoris light on fire. I used my grip to rock into him harder, wanting the feeling to last as long as possible. Sean thrust into me hard and fast, giving me exactly what I wanted.
When it was over, I pulled my nails from his skin and let my head roll back.
Sean pressed his forehead against mine and stared into my eyes. The heated stare was intense and strong, full of possession as well as love. I loved it when he treated me this way, taking me without permission. I was his and there was nothing I could do about it. Not that I wanted to.
When he wrapped his hand around my neck I knew he was ready to come inside me. He didn’t tighten his grip, just let his fingers rest there. With a final thrust, he pounded into me, moaning as he released. I loved watching him come. It was the hottest thing I had ever seen. I liked knowing I was the woman who got him off, that he loved, that he was so obsessed with that he changed into a completely different person.
He finished then remained on top of me, not pulling out. He pulled me closer to him, holding me to his chest. Without words, he relayed how much he loved and adored me, that he couldn’t be apart from me.
“I can’t wait until I marry you either.”
He locked his gaze onto mine. “I’m the luckiest bastard in the whole world.”
“No, I am.”
His eyes softened. “That’s the biggest falsehood I’ve ever heard.
I don’t deserve you.”
“I’ll never leave you. You’re too good in bed.”
He chuckled. “So that’s how I keep you around.”
“I’ve never been with someone who made me come without touching me. I hardly came when guys were fucking me.”
He smiled. “I know your body better than you do, that’s why. And guys are dogs. They don’t care about getting the girl off. They just want to come.”
“It seems like you care more about satisfying me.”
“Well, if that’s the only thing keeping you around, I better stay on top of my game.”
I licked the sweat from his chest then looked up at him again. “Good. Then there won’t be any problems. Keep up the good work.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
I chuckled then ran my fingers through his hair. “I like this power.”
“I’m a slave for you. I’ll do whatever you want.”
“In exchange for what?”
“You. Just you. Let me take care of you, love you, sleep with you, look at you. Just let me have you. That’s all I want.”
“So you please me as much as I want, and all I have to do is love you?”
“You don’t even have to love me. Just be with me.”
“You sound desperate.”
“I am desperate.”
“That sounds like a good deal.”
“For me. I don’t see what you get out of it.”
“Babe, I get everything I’ve ever dreamed of.”
He shook his head. “I’m not good enough to be your dream.”
“You’re right. You’re my fantasy. You’re too good to be true.”
He stared at me, saying nothing. The emotion in his eyes told me enough. I was everything he ever dreamed of. He just couldn’t believe I felt the same way.
2
“Where the fuck are you?” Ryan barked over the phone.
“We’re leaving now. Calm down.”
“You should have been here half an hour ago.”
“Well, I lost track of time.”
“Doing what?”