It’s not like rehab was an option. There might have still been a few of the places left, but they would cost way more than Rebekah had to spend. She’d really tried to go sober that first day when she came back to her sister’s place. But eventually, she thought through it and her drug use hadn’t scared Mason off when they’d met. It’s not like he’d told her to stop using, and it had been all too easy to convince herself she didn’t need to quit just yet. As much as she wanted to contradict what her sister was saying, maybe that was why her motivation wasn’t where it needed to be.
“I’m just saying, things may seem great now, but what happens the first time you fight? Won’t it be all too easy to use again?” Gwen pressed her advantage. The fact that she was so naively arguing from the point of view that Rebekah was clean now just heaped on that much more guilt, and a thought struck Rebekah. At some point, she’d come to view the world the same way as Gwen. There were still things worth living for: Louise was proof of that. Maybe Mason was too.
She’d known for a long time that if she was ever going to go sober, it would have to be because she wanted to and not for anyone else. Mason might’ve revived the idea, and her sister might be pushing for it, but the only way it would ever stick is if she really wanted it, and for the first time, she thought she did. If having a real relationship with Mason lay on the other side; if having her sister and niece back in her life was an option, she wanted that.
“But how do I ask him to wait?” she wasn’t married to the idea yet, but she could feel a sort of excitement building within her.
“You don’t ask, you just tell him. If he’s so great, he’ll do it,” Gwen had the warmest expression Rebekah had seen on her face in quite a while. Her sister finally felt like she was getting through to her.
Rebekah sighed. She could feel the craving coming back so now was as good a time as any. “Can I use your phone?” she asked.
Gwen nodded. “Of course.” She handed her phone across the table to Rebekah who punched in Mason’s number. She’d already memorized it.
“Hello there,” came his reply after only one ring.
“Hi. Listen, there’s no easy way to say this, so I’m just going to say it,” Rebekah was talking fast, hoping to get through this before she lost her nerve.
“Uh oh,” was all Mason said.
“Yeah. I need to focus on getting sober, and now just isn’t the right time for me to be dating. I really like you though, and I hope we can still see where this goes a little later? Once I’m better?”
“Wow, going clean for real this time?” he said it respectfully, but had he known? She thought she was an expert at hiding it when she wanted to.
“Yeah,” she was still trying to figure out he had known she was still using. Maybe she was just being paranoid and he just hadn’t taken her initial attempt that seriously.
“And you can’t do that and see me?” It was a fair question from a non-addict who didn’t realize the focus and willpower it would take for her to overcome even just the next few days.
“Not really. Seeing you involves going out into the world; into the city, and I know all the places to get heroin out there. I need to just stay inside for a while and focus on one thing at a time.” Rebekah saw Gwen wince a little out of the corner of her eye at the mention of the drug, and for the briefest moment, a massive wave of regret hit Rebekah. She wished she could go back to the first time she used and throw it in the trash. She saw the life her sister had, how enviably unaware of the world of drug use she was, and saw the great waste that her own life had been. The feeling threatened to overwhelm her, so she was glad when Mason responded.
“I have an idea. I’ll see you in a bit,” he said and hung up. Rebekah felt a twinge of panic. She’d already told him where her sister lived so that he could pick her up for their third date, but that meant ‘see you in a bit’ was no idle threat. He might actually show up here, and she shuddered to think how her sister would respond when the doorman buzzed her for his entrance.
Gwen looked concerned. “How’d he take it?”
Rebekah responded, “Surprisingly well. Possibly because he’s in complete denial about pretty much everything I said.”
14
Maya could feel the onset of her thoughts starting to fracture. It was an unpleasant feeling, like what she remembered being tired but forced to stay awake felt like when she was human. Sleep worked a little differently for her now – on the complete opposite schedule for starters – but she could remember that it made it hard to focus on any one thing.
The Project had taken plenty of precautions at her instruction, so she wasn’t worried about their safety. Aidan and Trevor were walking her around the compound. Trevor was giving her a tour, but Aidan was distracted by his phone. She couldn’t read Aidan. The uncomfortable topic of what she would eat had come up, and Dr. Monroe had suggested he draw blood from a volunteer. Aidan had immediately stepped forward and begun rolling up his sleeve. When he realized everyone was watching him, he froze. “My stuff’s probably like rocket fuel for her. Plus, you pansies’ll be mopin’ ‘round for days talking ‘bout ‘ow you’re all drowsy if you do it.” He’d been right though. She hadn’t tasted any difference in his blood once Dr. Monroe had given it to her, but she could tell she wouldn’t get hungry for a very long time. He had been there when she needed someone, but now, he couldn’t seem to care less.
She was unrestrained for the first time in days, much to Dr. Westfield’s chagrin. Maya didn’t mind the frequent periods of restraint, however. She was used to that; it was the relative freedom The Project afforded her that she was still getting used to. The other members of The Project, be it Trevor’s soldiers, or Dr. Monroe’s two research assistants, or any of the service staff, still kept their distance from her, but did their best to politely avoid staring. Most of them had spent years, if not decades, being told their mission was to wipe vampires from the Earth, but now, two of their most respected members seemed utterly at ease bringing one into their midst, and didn’t particularly think it was a big deal. She could tell it was disconcerting to them.
It was a nice enough compound, and well maintained, but Alexander would still be frustrated to see that this small band of humans with their humble means were the ones thwarting him. It was a testament to the human spirit that Alexander would never understand. Most likely he hadn’t even when he was human. The tour, however, was pointless. If they wanted her to know her way around, they’d need to wait until her next lucid period and show her around again. Each room they took her to seemed exactly like the last and exactly like the next. She couldn’t tell what made any of the rooms different, although perhaps that was due to her prolonged isolation.
It had been literal decades since she’d been out of the room Alexander kept her in. He had seemed to enjoy tormenting her, bringing her only the completely innocent to drink from. Most of the time young, but occasionally someone older, just someone who had lived a good life. You could always tell in the blood. Maya wasn’t like Kai; she couldn’t read people’s memories from the blood, but it was still an impression she got. Alexander would wait until she was too thirsty to stop herself, and the one time she had managed to pull back before her victim died, Alexander had finished them off. Even crueler, for now they suffered a second time after tasting the hope that they might live. Maya hadn’t tried to stop herself after that. She would rather bear the guilt of the death than let Alexander take the pleasure of it.
Early on, she had thought he brought her these innocents to corrupt her, to assuage his guilt over turning her, for she had been just as good a person as he ever found for her to feed on. By the end, she knew he just enjoyed inflicting pain upon her. He felt no guilt in turning her; to him it was a gift she was rudely rejecting.
Trevor was the opposite. Trevor was constantly apologizing to her for the times she was restrained. “You’re not our prisoner, we just have to be cautious to start,” he said. She could see in his eyes that he meant it, and that he was
torturing himself for not being able to do more for her. It was strange: she didn’t know where this compassion came from. How could he kill so many vampires without a second thought, but with her, be so sensitive? The only thing he had said to her on the subject had come on the van ride back to their home base. “Alexander is our enemy and it seems he’s yours too. That makes us at least allies.” She hadn’t known whether it was actually for her, or more to his men in the van with them, who surely wondered if their boss had gone off the deep end. Maya could sense the displeasure of some of them, but none of them spoke up or even made it particularly obvious: their respect for Trevor was too great. The statement had been the only words spoken on the entire trip back, and if not for Aidan’s snoring, it would’ve been the only sound beyond road noise. Even if Trevor’s comment was for her, there had to be more to it than that. Surely Trevor hadn’t harbored the notion that a vampire would work against Alexander until he’d met Maya, so his care for her came from somewhere else. It wasn’t lust; she had seen none of the longing in his eyes that she was used to seeing in other’s (Aidan’s, for instance). She would have to ask him sometime, when it was easier for her to string her thoughts together into words. Conversation was always difficult for her when she was beginning to slip.
Trevor was mid-sentence, but she interrupted him. “I think it may be time for me to be restrained again.” She had explained to him everything: her vicious other self and the insanity in between, the visions she had while she wasn’t herself, and how hopefully, those visions could help The Project destroy Alexander. “I’m sorry, I don’t mean to interrupt, it’s just… it’s getting difficult for me to pay attention and know when someone is speaking.”
Trevor paused for a moment. “Of course. Let’s show you to your room.”
Aidan either hadn’t been paying attention to their conversation, or didn’t care. He was grinning ear to ear and chuckling to himself from something on his phone screen. “Boss, you gotta see this,” he said and turned the phone to Trevor.
Trevor gave him a look and put his hand on Maya’s shoulder to lead her away. “Not now, Aidan.”
Maya froze as if she’d just remembered she left the oven on. “Wait…” she mumbled.
Aidan was undeterred. “This bloke gets creamed by a car, and just walks away like it’s nothin’!”
“Mason,” Maya muttered.
Trevor looked concerned. “What did you say, Maya?”
Maya had turned and was grabbing Trevor by the shoulders now. She could tell she was grabbing a bit too hard, because he winced, but she couldn’t stop herself. “You have to find him! Find Mason!”
Trevor was using his hands to try to calm several of his men who were nearby. They weren’t exactly fond of watching their boss get manhandled by a vampire, especially one that he gave far too wide a berth for their liking. Trevor put his attention back on her. “Maya, calm down. Who is Mason?”
Maya grabbed the phone from Aidan and held it in front of her, facing the screen to Trevor. “Him! Find him!”
15
Alexander was constantly reminding himself that none of this was Kai’s fault. The two of them were standing in Maya’s compound looking at the body of… Alexander couldn’t remember. Not like it was likely to come up much anymore. He had been Alexander’s newest turning, so there was no way he could’ve given The Project much of anything, but that was really reaching to find something positive. This was two big losses in a row for Alexander and it had him in a bad mood. If he kept his cool, however, and focused on the big picture, none of it would matter.
It had been years since he’d seen her cell empty. If she was ever allowed out, it was while she was the much more agreeable Maya, and Alexander always accompanied her on those trips. Standing here now, it felt small without her in it. It had been so long since the weaker Maya had been out of her room that the outside world might be overwhelming for her. Maybe Alexander would get lucky and the stress would cause her to jump personalities and murder her liberators before finding her way back to him. It was unrealistic, but Alexander didn’t mind daydreaming about the deaths of a few of his enemies.
Of course, it could have been much worse. Those idiots at The Project, constantly chasing Alexander’s shadow had just come within miles of finding his home and they had no idea. The thought sent a shiver up his spine. He’d considered them an annoyance, but they were quickly rising to the rank of actual adversary.
The Project didn’t realize it, but they were actually doing him a favor when they cleared the nests he set up as diversions. He never had any intention of actually using the random groups he turned for those, and The Project clearing them so quickly and mercilessly sent a message to the vampires in his ‘employ’: there, but for the grace of Alexander, goes you. One might think that immortality was gift enough to inspire loyalty, and true, it was in some, but in others, the bogeyman of The Project was all that kept them in line.
The slaying of Gabriel and liberation of Maya sent a different message, however. Gabriel had been under Alexander’s protection, and everyone knew how valuable Maya was to him. If The Project could get at them, his vampires belief in him providing a haven could shatter. The fact that Gabriel had died because of a nest he created instead of anything Alexander had done likely wasn’t a hair they were interested in splitting. Maya only being freed because of Gabriel was even less relevant.
“We’ll get her back, sir,” Kai tried to reassure him, misreading the source of Alexander’s apprehension.
“I don’t think we need to,” Alexander replied. As far as he could see, he had two options. He could devote his resources to getting Maya back, and who knew who long that would take, or he could go off the intel she had already delivered to them, and claim a much bigger prize. That wasn’t to say she couldn’t prove useful again further down the road. “At least not yet,” he added.
∆ ∆ ∆
When he’d found her in the Brazilian city of Pelotas over thirty years ago, Maya had been something of a soothsayer for her neighborhood. This was when the societal wounds from The Fall were still fresh, but the people who heeded Maya’s advice always seem to do alright. Her father bounced around between odd jobs, while her mother mended clothes, but the pair wasn’t making enough to support their three children, depending on the goodwill shown by the people Maya helped to make ends meet. Perhaps a farmer shared a little of his crop, or someone simply overpaid her parents for simple work, but Alexander didn’t understand why she didn’t just use her gift to directly improve her family’s place in life, especially given how important her family obviously was to her. To him, her family had been completely disposable. For the life him now, he couldn’t remember what a single one of them looked like.
Maya was the oldest of the family’s children at twenty-one with two twin younger brothers that adored her. It wasn’t difficult to learn about her with how her neighbors would prattle on about her at the slightest provocation. Alexander had learned that she had plenty of suitors (none of her neighbors missing the chance to extol how beautiful she was, didn’t he agree?), but she never seemed interested in any of them, or in leaving her brothers for that matter. She doted on them every chance she had, and since she cared so much for them, so did the neighborhood.
Those same discussions with neighbors all inevitably turned to the time Maya had helped them with this or that difficult decision, and how her advice had been indispensable. Alexander was beginning to put together some pretty grand plans himself, and that sort of sage advice seemed like a nice luxury to have. He was a man of science and Maya’s advice had a little too much supernatural flair for his taste, but the strength of science was admitting what you didn’t know, so Alexander didn’t much care where that advice came from as long as it was sound. Besides, he had made himself into a vampire, another scientifically preposterous idea, so perhaps this was no different.
Alexander stalked her for weeks until he was satisfied that this was much more than a typical cold read scam. Every ni
ght, she took a walk along the Lagoa dos Patos, a lagoon on the edge of town. It was a dangerous thing for a woman to do alone post-Fall, but everyone in the area knew who she was, so she was safe where perhaps others wouldn’t have been. Alexander would follow her on these walks from a distance no human could detect, and try to get to know this fortune-teller. She never spoke beyond greeting those she passed during her walks, but he still felt like he had a glimpse into her personality. She didn’t seem to have much of an ego in her dealings with people, like many beautiful people would have. A plus, since it suggested a lack of vanity, a trait Alexander had no time for (he did not yet realize that the turning so rarely left your personality intact). These walks became something of a nightly ritual for the two of them, though she was unaware of his involvement.
Except the night Alexander had decided to turn her, she wouldn’t leave her home. He had felt this change coming for weeks before hand, a sudden urge to make more of his kind, and when he awoke on his thirtieth birthday, he knew something was different: he was capable of creating another vampire now. He had risen, fed quickly, and searched the coast she could normally be found at. It had been thundering since Alexander awoke, so when it finally started raining as well, he thought that perhaps she had taken her walk earlier to avoid the weather. He walked to her home, and gotten close enough for his vampire hearing to make out what was going on inside. Maya was crying unconsolably, telling her family that something terrible was going to happen. Alexander had smiled to himself in the moonlight behind her house. Running his tongue across the point of his fangs, he thought how ironic that the terrible thing would have only befallen her instead of her entire family if she hadn’t had her gift to warn her. The lightning overhead and increasing rain intensity seemed to fit this night for her.
Sanguine Series (Book 1): The Fall Page 9