by Jo Tannah
Tristan looked around and saw the maître d signal someone behind Zach. From afar, he saw the host watching them as he spoke rapidly into the phone.
“Sit. The. Fuck. Down.”
Zach turned back to meet his father’s angry eyes glaring up at him.
“Don’t you talk to Zach that way, Jonathan. If you don’t calm down, I’ll make sure you’re out of this restaurant faster than you can say forgive me.” Joanna’s calm voice clearly cut through to Jonathan like nothing else could, and he sat back down in his chair breathing deeply, as though he’d run a mile.
“Jonathan,” Tristan said in a tight voice, trying to gain control of his rising temper. “You’ve known me since high school. Longer, even. Zach is twenty-eight. An adult. To ask if I touched him when he was younger just shows how dirty your mind is. You should have more respect for me as your best friend. To insinuate that I’m depraved is beneath our relationship.”
“I did not say you were a—” Jonathan said harshly.
“You implied it,” Tristan said. “But to put your dirty mind to rest—no, I never touched Zach until the other night.”
“He’s my son. Tristan, he’s my son.”
“Yes, he is. I’m sorry the one I fell for is your son, Jon, but Zach and I, we’re together.” Tristan lowered his voice. “You either accept that or not, but we’re staying together. He’s mine and I’m his. Nothing and no one can say anything that will change our minds.”
“Even if it breaks up our friendship? Our partnership?”
Tristan’s eyes narrowed at the challenge. “You want to break up our friendship and the firm because of your misguided pride?”
Jonathan leaned over the table and met Tristan’s gaze, stare for stare. “And what if I do?”
Tristan and Jonathan faced off in a silent duel. Zach looked back and forth at the two men, head swinging right then left as if watching an intense tennis match. When neither man blinked, his opened his mouth to speak out, but Joanna beat him to it.
“Gentlemen, you’ll both calm down and behave like adults. You’re embarrassing me and Zach. Now enough.” Joanna placed her hand calmly over the table surface. She might as well have slammed it down.
Zach stood, trembling and turning pale when neither Tristan nor Jonathan backed off from their silent war. He stepped away from the table and cleared his throat.
“If the two of you are not going to behave, Mom and I are getting out of here. I think this is a conversation that is best had in private, not in a public restaurant. Perhaps another time is best. Mom, let’s leave them alone. I’ve had enough of this pissing contest.”
“I agree,” Joanna said and she, too, stood up from the table. She picked up her handbag and stepped out from her side of the table. “Let’s go outside and take a stroll by the beach, shall we, baby? You can buy me frogurt while we’re at it.” She stepped beside Zach and tucked her arm into his.
“It’s froyo, Mom.” He held on to her arm and patted it.
“It is? I’d always thought it was frogurt. Anyway, I’m craving something with berry toppings.”
“You will both sit down and finish this discussion with us,” Jonathan said, anger simmering in his voice.
Tristan watched Joanna ignore Jonathan as she walked with Zach out of the restaurant.
Left alone, they stared at each other, neither of them saying a word. After ten minutes of silence, Jonathan raised a hand and ordered a drink. When the waiter hesitated, he glared at the poor man. Once the tumbler was delivered, he took a sip.
“How can you do this to me, Tris?” Jonathan said, his focus locked on the swirling amber liquid.
“I didn’t do anything to you, Jon. How can I explain it without making you angrier than you already are? You don’t listen when you’re angry.”
“You’ve not seen him for five years. Why now?”
“Exactly. It’s been five years, and even if Margaret and the boys saw him, I never did. I can’t explain it. He walked in and it was like I got punched in the gut. It is what it is.”
“Tris, I’m Margaret’s godfather for God’s sake! Hell, why can’t you choose someone else? Why does it have to be my Zach?”
“I don’t have any answers for you, Jon. Don’t you think I haven’t asked myself those questions? All I can do is apologize that it’s Zach and not someone unrelated to you.”
“You’ve known him since he was four.”
“I know. Don’t you think I know that? Don’t you think it bothers me that I’ve babysat him and watched him grow up into a man? Don’t you think I feel old when I’m with him? I have thought this over, fought myself with the decision I reached. It’s just... ”
“What?”
“You know I married Amanda when she got pregnant, right? You know I loved her, but I was never in love with her.”
“Yeah, I know that. I said to you then that you were an idiot, but did you listen to me? No, of course not. You just went on ahead married her and had two more children.”
“Well... ”
At Tristan’s continued silence, Jonathan looked at his best friend’s flushed face.
“What is it?”
“I’m in love with him, Jon. Forgive me, but I am.”
Jonathan sat back heavily into his chair and downed the shot of whiskey in one gulp. “Fuck.”
* * * *
Outside on the boardwalk, Zach and Joanna sat on a bench lazily eating their frozen yogurt topped with blue and red berries. It was a beautiful, cool night by the beach where guests were quietly walking, taking in the sights. Joanna nudged Zach’s shoulder and tilted her head in the direction they’d come from. Zach looked up and watched Jonathan and Tristan walk side by side as they exited the hotel resort.
“Do you think they kissed and made up?” Joanna asked as she licked her plastic white spoon.
“I hope not. I don’t think Dad’s the type to kiss Tristan,” Zach said as he, too, licked his spoon.
Joanna slapped gently on his arm. “Naughty boy. You know what I mean,” she said with a laugh.
“I know, Mom. It’s just... I hope they make up their minds soon and just be friends again. The tension is killing me.”
“You must understand it from my and your father’s point of view. There is a huge gap in your ages. Everyone will focus on that. They won’t see that you two care for each other. What about Margaret and the boys? Do they know? Have you told them yet?”
“No, we haven’t told them anything. We wanted you and Dad to know first. We both respect you two too much.”
“What about children? You know I’ve always wanted grandchildren from you.”
“Mom, it’s been what? Not even a week. We’ll get there when we do. Right now, I’m living in the moment.”
Joanna looked at her son, a tender smile on her face. “Honey? Who are you trying to fool? I’m not blind. I see your face when he’s around you. And stop squirming, it’s not as if you can help it. Your face has always been very expressive. How do you think I knew? One look and I saw it plain as day. He’s it for you. Don’t you think he should know that too?”
Zach didn’t know what to say, so instead he focused on the two men walking toward them.
* * * *
Tristan placed his hands in his pockets. Despite the clear sky and jacket he wore, the air felt chilly. His argument with Jonathan had made him tense up, and that always managed to make him sensitive to the cold.
“I can’t believe you’re dating my son.”
“I told you, I love him. I haven’t told him yet and I know it’s too early, but I really do.”
“Of course you do, you’d be an idiot not to. He’s a good kid and incredibly smart. Good looking, too. Plus, I raised him well. He takes after me.”
Tristan smiled ruefully and shook his head. “Zach got his good looks from Joanna, Jon, but I do agree you raised him well.”
They reached the end of the path and spotted Joanna and Zac
h sitting on a bench a few yards away.
“I want to punch you so bad,” Jon said, turning his face up to the breeze and sniffing the air.
“I’d let you, but only once. Then it’s free for all.”
“Fuck you.”
“No, thanks.”
Jonathan fell silent. When they neared Zach and Joanna, he spoke up again. “You hurt him and you’re mincemeat.”
“I can’t promise you that. I swear, I’d never hurt Zach. Not willingly or intentionally.”
“This is so wrong, Tris.”
“It’s not.”
Tristan watched Jonathan stop walking and stare at him. They’d been best friends for a long time and been through a lot, always been there for each other, even the times when either man thought he was making the wrong decision. He’d been the one to move heaven and earth to make sure Joanna’s annulment pushed through without delay. Tristan watched Jonathan expressions change from frustration to anger. Clearly, he was thinking over the probabilities of this unexpected turn of events. When Jonathan continued to stay silent, he felt his heart begin to pound and the fear rose inside him. He opened his mouth to plead his and Zach’s case some more, but Jonathan beat him to it.
“I know it’s not,” Jonathan said. “It’s just difficult, you know? I mean... seriously man. I get to call you son?”
“Oh, fuck you, Parker. Just fuck you.”
“Ah, no thanks!”
* * * *
The smiles were still on their lips when they reached the end of the walk and went over to where Zach and Joanna were sitting. Jonathan bent to kiss Joanna on the cheek. Zach rose as Tristan reached him. He rubbed Zach’s back briefly before putting his hands back in his pockets.
“Is everything okay between you now? You’re not going to fight?” Zach looked at Tristan and then at his father.
Tristan nodded. Jonathan turned to look at his son, who met his gaze without fear.
“Are you sure about this, Zach?”
Zach nodded determinedly. “I’ve wanted this for a long time, Dad. Please, give us this chance.”
Jonathan sighed and shook his head. “You do realize you have a limited number of years left together, should you go for the long haul.”
“I’d rather have the next twenty to thirty years with him, longer even, than not having him beside me.”
“Ah, damn it, Zach.” Jonathan rubbed his hand over his scalp. “You make it difficult for me.”
“I love him, Dad.”
“Oh, hon... ” Tristan began, when Amanda suddenly walked into view. Margaret, Giles, Joshua and Mark were coming up from behind, running to catch up with her.
“You make me sick!” Amanda screamed at them when she neared them. People along the beach turned to look their way. “You’ve been lusting after my husband since you were twelve?”
“What are you doing here, Amanda?” Tristan said, getting tired of her drunken dramatics.
“Dad! Mom’s been talking about how she caught you and Zach kissing. Is this true?” Margaret said as she caught up to them.
“Not now, Margaret,” Tristan said in a weary voice.
“No, Dad,” Margaret said. “You have to understand. We need a confirmation. Tell us the truth. Please, Dad.”
Tristan looked at the expectant faces of his children and his new son-in-law, searching for some sign of distaste or intolerance. Seeing nothing but eager faces and knowing he’d never been able to consciously lie to his children—he couldn’t not tell them the truth.
“Yes. Zach and I are together,” he finally said.
The whoop coming from Mark startled everyone, but nothing surprised them more than Joshua doing a happy dance, holding out his hand to the disappointed looking Giles and Margaret.
“We won. Ha! Hand it over,” Mark said in a smug tone as he and Joshua gave each other a high five.
Zach’s mouth fell open “You made a bet on us?” He was speechless when his friends exchanged two one-hundred-dollar bills between themselves.
“Oh man, it was so easy,” Mark said, pocketing his share of the winnings. “I mean, I’ve watched you ogle Dad for so long I’d had to have been blind to have missed it. Giles mentioned that Joshua said you’d mistakenly handed him the wrong key card and opened Dad’s room instead of yours. When Joshua confirmed you and Dad were in connecting rooms and the door between it was open, we made a bet with these two that you two were banging each other.” His wide smile and mischievous look turned to pain, shock and disbelief when his mother’s slap on his face echoed across the boardwalk.
“You are sick!” Amanda screamed at him. She pointed an accusing finger at them. “All of you are sick! How dare you make fun of me? How dare you stand there and make bets on your father and Zach?”
Amanda’s shocking display of violence stunned everyone around. No one moved, no one could say anything, too shocked at what they had just witnessed.
“I did not raise children who make bets.” She continued to scream at them. “If there is one thing I can never tolerate, that’s gambling. To make a bet on your father and friend is obnoxious. You three are detestable little shits. It must be the result of having a fag for a father and leaving you to an immigrant maid whose first act was to spread her legs for a big, black cock... ”
Her outburst was cut short when her own face turned sharply to the left from a resounding whack that echoed through the air. Groups of bystanders gathered around their little group, craning their necks to catch a better view of the action.
“Deputa ka! Don’t you ever raise your hand on my children. I swear to God you hit one of them again, I will gut you like a fish!” The loud, angry words came from Joanna who’d planted herself in front of the children she loved.
“Ladies, please, let’s take this somewhere else, okay?” Jonathan said as he tried to take Joanna in his arms.
Tristan watched Joanna slap Jonathan’s arms away. Despite her diminutive size, barely reaching Jonathan’s chest, she stood, legs apart, fisted hands on her sides, positioning herself between her family and a gaping Amanda, who pressed a hand against a rapidly reddening cheek.
“I have had enough of you, bitch,” Joanna was saying. “Or would you like me to call you kaplog? Like the kaplog you really are. You know what that word means? It means lowlife slut. I may be a Filipino immigrant, but I did not spread my legs as you say the first day I met Jonathan. I did that on our wedding night. Not like you who spread your legs for everyone and anyone who came knocking on your door!”
Margaret began to cry, and Giles wrapped her in his arms, but he continued to watch Joanna’s rare display of temper. He was not the only one. Tristan and Zach stared speechless at the two women.
“I did not raise those children to be slapped around by you,” Joanna said in a much lower voice, moving closer to Amanda, a finger pointing to the other woman’s nose. “Yes, I agree. They should never have thought of making bets. But you do not get to hit them. Ever. No one gets to hit them. You raise your hand once more, and as I warned you ten years ago, you hit Mark one more time, and I’ll have you thrown in jail for child abuse.”
Joanna’s words rang in Tristan’s ears. He stood watching the showdown between the women, the revelation shaking him to the core.
“Child abuse?” Tristan looked from one woman to the other. “What do you mean? Did you hit Mark before, Amanda? Why am I just now hearing this for the first time? Mark?”
Amanda looked from Mark to Joanna then to Tristan, but didn’t say a word. She took a step back looking around her. When she saw the many onlookers, she froze in her tracks.
“I caught her hitting Mark after he asked her not to gossip about us to her guests. He was only six at that time,” Joanna said, not taking her eyes off Amanda.
“Mark?” Tristan turned to his youngest son. He rubbed a hand over his stomach, where a dull pain had begun to throb.
Mark was shaking his head, pale from the shock of his mother slap
ping him. “I don’t remember anything, Dad. I don’t remember.”
“I do.”
Everyone turned to Joshua, who stood apart, arms down his side, hands fisted in anger as he looked at his mother in disgust. “I remember her hitting you. I tried to stop her, but she closed the door on me. I ran next door to Tita Jo. I told her about what happened and she came over to the house to stop Mom. I don’t know how she stopped her, but she did. I didn’t hear what Tita Jo said to Mom, but she never hit Mark again.”
Tristan’s heart gave a hard thump against his chest. He turned to a now sobbing Amanda. He breathed through his mouth in an effort to calm his rising anxiety.
“I can forgive you your sleeping around, but this?” He shook his head in disbelief. “Oh my God, why? What did they ever do to you? They’re your children. Mark’s our youngest.”
“Because they’re yours.” The words were snarled out. “Look at you. So happy you’ve landed someone young.” Amanda sneered at them both. “What’s sick is you watched him grow up in our house. He’s our children’s best friend, you sick fuck.”
The revulsion twisted Amanda’s face into something so shocking Tristan involuntarily took a step back. He couldn’t believe the hatred coming off from the woman who had birthed his children. His breathing came in between gasps. When he felt arms wrap around him, he instinctively knew they were Zach’s and he tried to relax against him, but his heart continued to pound.
“Tris, relax please, you might have a heart attack. Please, hon,” Zach began to plead. Tristan raised his hand to hold on to the arm around his chest, but he suddenly felt so tired. His mind refused to accept his son’s suffering. He’d never hit any one of his children, never wanted to make them go through what he had to endure growing up. That Amanda had hit Mark enough to make Joshua run for help... his mind began to blank out as breathing became harder and he gasped for air.
“Stop this,” he heard Zach say, his voice soothing to Tristan’s ears. “Where were you when my mother wiped their tears away when they got hurt? Mom was the one who took us to our games and Margaret to her ballet lessons. It was she who made our costumes for Halloween, sometimes refusing to sleep until we had what we each wanted. She’s our mother. Not just mine. All of us.”