by Raisor, Gary
"Hey, I was only eighteen. Do you know how long I had to save up for that room? I was so scared your old man would find out about us. You remember how he said he was going to have you dusted for fingerprints after I brought you home? He threatened to shoot my ass off if he found any of mine on you. He was a cop. I believed him."
Louise laughed and this time there was no bitterness in it.
A young woman's voice sounded in the room, asking Louise who was on the phone. Louise said something to her, then came back on the line. "Look, I've got to go. If I have anything, I'll call you at seven tonight."
He held the line. "Louise…."
"Take care of yourself, John." The connection broke.
John picked up his remaining quarter and eased out the door. In the bright morning sun, with people swarming around him, the darkness inside his head didn't seem so real. He thought about Louise on that long-ago prom night. The room might have been cheap but what had happened between them that night hadn't been.
Pop yelled something at him but he couldn't quite make it out. He waved as he climbed into his Jeep.
Pop came out into the parking lot and waved him down. The old man held a white sack in his hand. "You weren't gonna leave without taking some of my doughnuts, were you?" He handed the sack over to John. He stood there for a moment, studying the younger man's face. "Hope everything works out for you, son."
"Much obliged, pop."
When he got back to his room, he was too wired to sleep so he turned on the TV.
He didn't make it to the first commercial.
The phone pulled him out of a heavy sleep and he had to crawl across the bed to answer it. The room was dark, but he could make out a white shape on the sheets. Pop's doughnuts lay beside him, smashed. He mumbled his name into the mouthpiece.
"It's Louise. Damn it, you gave me a scare. It's seven o'clock. The phone rang nine times before you picked up. I thought something had happened to you."
"Slow down, Louise. I'm fine. Did you find out anything about Joey Estevez?"
"A lot more than I wanted to know. You were right, he was a male prostitute and he was murdered in Vegas two weeks ago." Her voice filled with sadness. "He was only fifteen… three years younger than Amy."
"How did it happen?"
"He was stabbed, oh God, John—he was stabbed fifty-three times. And then somebody scalped him."
John thought about the rats, the sharp pains that the boy had felt all over his body, the slash on his forehead. It was beginning to make sense. "Where was he found?"
"Let's see." She paused to consult something.
"It was in a second-story walk-up," John said, watching it happen again inside his head. "They found him lying on the bed and he was dressed all in black. Black high-tops, black jeans, and a black leather jacket."
"Stop it, John. You're scaring me."
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you. Something else happened in that room, something that I couldn't get a fix on. Is there anything else?"
"Well, there was one thing…"
"Please, Louise, I've got to know."
"I don't know if this will mean anything to you. There was too much blood in the room, even for a stabbing. But maybe they're wrong about that. They said," she hesitated, "there wasn't anything left in him. It was all on the walls and floor."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes, the report said something blew every drop of blood out of his body."
Chapter 4
The bar was a cheap bar in a cheap part of town.
The bar was called The Watering Hole. The town was called Vegas.
Inside the bar, the cigarette smoke was thick enough to cut with a knife. Nobody seemed to mind. Three people, so old they were sexless, were feeding quarters to the one-armed bandits against the wall, making mechanical love to the machines. Their money went in. Foreplay began. The arm went down. Back up. Holding them at bay. No consummation between flesh and blood and metal this time.
The expressions on the faces of the slot players matched those of the machines they courted: cold, hard. They seemed to have no expectations of winning. And yet they kept at their chore with dogged determination, as though they had forgotten why they were doing it.
On a raised stage, three girls were dancing, moving in and out of the dimness with indifference, thrusting their naked bodies at the crowd without any semblance of passion. They couldn't even fake it anymore. Their faces were slack, without emotion. Slack faces stared back at them from out of the dark. Most had more interest in their drinks than the girls.
All but one, Billy Two Hats.
Billy, who went by the name Billy T, was dressed in jeans, a white chambray shirt, and a denim jacket. A snow white Stetson rested on his head, snakeskin boots adorned his feet, making him look like a Saturday matinee cowboy. Nothing could have been farther from the truth—the only horse Billy T had ever been on was the kind you shot into your arm.
Billy T was a full-blooded Navajo.
And something rare for an Indian, he was a full-blooded psychopath.
Billy T was playing nine ball against some slumming yuppie and Billy T was getting his ass kicked up one side of the table and down the other. He knew why; his concentration was off. The girls on the stage were the reason. Billy T hadn't had a girl in over two months; however that was a situation he hoped to remedy tonight.
A few of the female patrons gave him a speculative glance, and he could have had any one of them.
But Billy T didn't want his women willing.
Billy T wasn't bent that way.
The yuppie in the expensive suit sank the nine ball and smiled. Earlier he had said he was a banker. He had a banker's smile. It looked like the one on the face of the man who had evicted Billy T's mom from her house when Billy T was ten. It looked like the smile on the face of the men who had come out of his mom's bedroom after working out a deal on the rent of whatever shithole place they had been living in.
"That makes twenty you owe me," the man with the banker's smile said. He made a motion to one of the waitresses for another scotch-and-soda. "How about you, chief, you drinking?" He smiled to show he meant no harm by the remark.
Billy T shook his head no. "We gonna shoot another game?"
"You going to pay me the twenty?"
Billy T laid the money on the table.
"You want to raise the stakes?" the banker asked. The smile was back as though it had never left.
Billy T had already lost a hundred, a hundred he couldn't afford. "Fuck you," he said. "And you can take that to the bank."
The smile left the well-fed face. "What's the matter, chief, the stakes too rich for your blood?"
The Navajo considered smashing his cue stick across the man's face, but he didn't want to get kicked out of the bar. One of the girls on the stage had caught his eye. He looked at the white man on the other side of the pool table and smiled. "You call me chief again and I'm going to cut your balls off." Billy T smiled to show he meant no harm by the remark.
The fleshy middle-aged man braced his back against a wooden column and gripped his pool cue. The five scotch-and-sodas he had consumed in the last hour gave him all the courage he needed. "Is that right? Well come on, chief, cut my balls off."
Billy T risked a quick look over his left shoulder to see where the bouncers were. Luck found Billy T for the first time tonight. They were busy trying to throw out a burly construction worker who had kept complaining the drinks were watered. There was plenty of time to take care of this white asshole.
Reaching down into his boot, Billy T produced a knife. Thin and sharp, perfectly balanced. Made for cutting. Or throwing.
He hefted the knife in his hand, his eyes those of a lover caressing his loved one. "Say good-bye to your balls, you white motherfucker."
The white guy raised the cue stick to hit Billy T.
Across the room, the construction worker got in a good shot and knocked down one of the bouncers. Blood spurted. The crowd cheered.
Billy T laughed, drew back his arm. And threw.
The knife was a smoky sliver of light, too fast to follow. There was a soft snicking sound as the blade buried itself in the wooden column. It was as though the knife had appeared there all by itself.
The white guy looked down at the blade that nestled in the juncture between his legs and then looked up at the Indian. His expression was one of wonder, like that of a small child who has just seen something magical happen. He reached down and touched the knife. His hand came back smeared with red. "You cut my balls off." He looked at his hand, covered with his blood, while he considered the implications. His blood was warm and red and he could feel it running down his legs. "You cut my balls off," he repeated.
Billy T stepped around the table and caught the guy a second before his eyes rolled up and he fainted dead away. Grasping him under the arms, Billy T half carried, half dragged him over to an empty table and sat him down. The banker slumped forward on the table as though drunk.
"You can relax, pal," Billy T said to the unconscious man. "Your balls weren't as big as you thought they were. I only nicked 'em."
The fight with the construction worker was still under way and nobody was paying any attention to what was going on in the corner. The crowd was still cheering the construction worker, who was beginning to tire. Billy T lifted the banker's wallet, then retrieved the knife and slipped it back in his boot. The whole thing hadn't taken more than ten seconds. Billy T felt good for the first time in a long time. This was going to be his lucky night, he could feel it way down in his bones.
Finally the bouncers got the construction worker out the door, and the waitress came over to the pool table with a scotch-and-soda. She saw the banker passed out at the table. "Shit, what am I supposed to do with this?"
Billy T pulled out a twenty and laid it on her tray before picking up the scotch-and-soda and downing it in a single gulp. "Keep the change," he said.
The waitress looked at him with new interest. Her interest was, of course, fueled by the twenty he had just given her. "You need anything, sugar, you just ask for me, Josie. I know how to show a cowboy a good time."
Billy T looked at the slightly heavy body of Josie and felt a faint stirring of heat in his stomach, but she wasn't what he wanted tonight. He looked past the waitress, at the stage where the blond with the creamy white body was gyrating for the drunken businessmen. Her eyes were hooded, her lips were moist. And her expression was bored, completely indifferent. There were ways to remove indifference in a woman.
The dancer was the most desirable woman Billy T had ever seen. He was going to have her. Tonight.
He placed his foot on a chair and adjusted his jeans over his boots, letting his fingers touch the handle of the knife, then the blade, sliding over the sharp edge until blood appeared. Touching his bloody fingers to his lips, he smiled.
Josie saw where Billy T was looking and her expression went hard. "She doesn't go out with the customers."
"Really," he said with feigned casualness. "Who does she go out with?"
"I don't know," Josie snapped. "Why don't you ask her yourself?"
"Maybe I will." Billy T pulled out another twenty. "Bring me a beer, will you, Josie?"
"How about your friend there?" She indicated the passed-out banker. "He need anything?"
"Yeah, a change of underwear."
It was a comment that Josie had heard too many times to find amusing. She snorted and went to get Billy T his beer.
Billy T turned his attention to the blond dancer on the stage. She turned her head, just the barest hint, and smiled. At him. Maybe it was his imagination. No, he was sure of it—she had smiled at him. Her expression went vacant again, and Billy T felt the heat in the pit of his stomach climb another notch.
The beer that Josie brought him only fueled the heat, like gasoline on smoldering coals. He hadn't wanted a woman this bad since Abilene. Images of blood and sweating, heaving bodies filled his mind, taking him away from where he was.
Taking him back to Abilene.
The girl had been so young, so innocent. At least she had been before that night.
If only the girl hadn't screamed.
He had been hitchhiking outside of Abilene when the old Mexican couple had stopped and picked him up in a van that smelled like chickens in the summer heat.
They had a granddaughter, sixteen, pretty, on the verge of womanhood, and there was no way for them to know that Billy Two Hats had already killed nine other women, stabbing them with the knife he carried in his boot.
They were simple, trusting people who went to church every Sunday and put their faith in God. A smile and a joke or two got Billy T invited to their house for dinner, a room for the night. It was easy. It always was. After all, he was charming and funny, and he looked like a matinee cowboy. Hell, even the family dog liked him.
Later in the night after everyone had gone to bed, Billy T went to the young girl's room. Her name was Maria. He stood there in the warm dark, savoring the moment, memorizing every detail, for he would play this night back in his mind for countless nights to come. Remembering was important. It was the only link to immortality. Even after Maria was dead, after he killed her, she wouldn't really be dead because she would live in his mind. Forever.
The room was a mix of innocence and worldliness—teddy bears and posters of bare chested movie stars, perfume and candy. He let it wash over him.
She had been fine after he cut her with the knife, really fine, doing everything he had asked. Anything to save her life. At the end she had known he was going to kill her anyway. That was when she had tried to scream, and he had cut her throat while he held her close and kissed her, tasting her blood as it poured from her mouth.
Then he killed the grandparents. That hadn't been as much fun as the girl. They had barely struggled at all, departing this world with small bubbling sighs as though they were secretly glad to be going.
He made sure the dog was fed before he left.
Last call sounded, shaking Billy T out of his reverie. His eyes focused and he saw the dancer on the stage was staring directly at him. Their gazes entwined, locked, and for a moment Billy T was disoriented, almost paralyzed, by the cold blue eyes. They looked like winter ice. It was crazy, he knew, but he had the feeling she knew what he had been thinking about, that she had somehow seen into his soul.
The scary part was the feeling she approved.
Billy T shook his head, trying to rid himself of the fear that had unexpectedly taken root. This wasn't the way it went down in Billy Two Hats' world. Women were scared of him, not the other way around. Wiping the sweat from his lip, he took another drink of beer and looked again at the dancer.
But this time his eyes went no higher than her high, creamy white breasts. He told himself it was because he liked her body. That he was committing it to memory. After a couple more drinks of his beer, he came to believe it himself. Almost.
The lights in the bar came up and the dancers began exiting the stage amid a smattering of applause. The one Billy T wanted was the last to leave. She paused, her eyes scanning the crowd one final time, coming to rest on Billy T. Her slack face held no expression that he could interpret, yet the mocking heat of her eyes taunted him. A drunken businessman in the crowd yelled something obscene at her, but she ignored him.
Billy T tried to meet her gaze, and yet he couldn't quite bring himself to do it. She was even better looking in the light. Flawless, unmarked skin. White, very white. Compared to her, the rest of the dancers were coarse, beneath contempt.
The dancer turned to go.
Then she paused and looked over her shoulder. She silently mouthed a single word.
It was aimed at Billy T. It was clear and distinct.
The word was Abilene.
Billy T went cold inside.
The dancer made a slashing motion beneath her throat before turning and vanishing from the stage, leaving Billy T staring openmouthed after her. This couldn't be happening. No on
e knew about Abilene.
About the rape.
About the murder.
Billy T gritted his teeth, causing his jaw muscles to bunch and unbunch in silent panic. They looked like snakes crawling beneath his skin. Rape and murder in Texas still carried the death penalty. He'd had to cut that Mexican girl's throat, it had been the only way he could stop her from screaming. If they connected him to her murder, her grandparents' murder, they would put him to death, and Billy Two Hats couldn't, imagine the world without himself in it.
Things were very simple in Billy T's world; he had to kill the dancer. And yet her saying Abilene to him didn't make any sense. If she knew about Abilene, then she knew what kind of man he was. She knew he would kill her. That not only didn't make sense, it was downright crazy. His head began to hurt as he tried to think. Suddenly he brightened. He had simply misread what she had said to him, that was it. That was the only answer. Anything else was impossible.
Billy T watched the bouncers drag the unconscious banker to the door. A smear of blood trailed after him. Nobody noticed. "Hey, cowboy," someone called out.
Billy T turned, saw Josie standing there with a note in her hand. She walked over and tucked it in his shirt pocket. "It's from your friend on the stage," Josie said. Her voice held a touch of petulance that she was unable to hide.
Billy T fished the note out and opened it. Meet me outside by your car. It was in bright red lipstick. It was signed Abilene.
The room tilted, and soured beer crowded the back of Billy T's throat.
"What's the matter, cowboy?" Josie asked. "You look a little pale all of a sudden. This could be your lucky night. You should be flattered. Juliana's danced here almost a month and I never even seen her say more than three words to a guy, let alone ask him out."
This was going from bad to worse, Billy T decided. Now Josie knew he was meeting the dancer and she had read the note, which meant she could connect him with Abilene. He wanted to slash Josie's throat so bad that for a moment he could actually see it bleeding.
With a quick motion of his hand, he reached over and gently brushed a finger across her throat. "Anybody ever tell you sticking your nose where it doesn't belong can get it cut off?" he asked in a quiet voice.