“Oh, that won’t work, missy,” he roared at her. “You think you can shed a few tears and I’ll fold like a bad hand of poker?”
She burst into tears. “At least let me get dressed.”
At that he stepped back and took a deep breath. “All right, damn it, get dressed. I can’t think with you naked as a jaybird.”
She sobbed as she slipped into her dress and when she looked up, he was still glaring at her.
“Where are the kids?” he asked.
“Out in the barn, playing,” she sobbed. She didn’t try to put up her hair, still loose around her shoulders.
“Do they know about this?”
She took a deep breath. “About what?”
“Hell, you know what. Do they know your real age?”
She didn’t want to get them in trouble. “Sort of. They know I’m a little older, but they never asked much.”
“And what about this feathers thing with Bonnie?”
He was already furious. If he knew about the scarlet plumes in her hair with the dance hall costume, he might be so mad, he’d be dangerous. “I—I told her I used to work on a chicken farm where feathers flew all over the place.”
Silence.
“Travis? For God’s sake, say something. You scare me when you just stand there glaring at me like that.”
He didn’t answer. She had hated lying to him, but she loved him so and he would surely throw her out if he knew her background.
He turned suddenly and walked away without answering. She waited to hear the front door slam behind him, certainly heading for the saloon, but instead, she heard him sit down in that creaky rocker by the fireplace. He might beat her like other men had done, but she loved him enough to take the chance.
Taking a deep breath, she slowly walked into the living room. “Please don’t be mad at me, Travis.”
He came to his feet and grabbed her shoulders. “Missy, you owe me one hellova explanation and I hate liars.”
She looked up at him and couldn’t hold the tears back.
“I was on the run, just like I told you, and every man I met tried to take advantage of me, so I decided that the easiest thing to do would be pass myself off as a kid.”
“Who are you running from?” His dark eyes were black with distrust and anger.
How she wished he would pull her to him, wipe the tears from her cheeks, and hold her close. His fingers were biting into her shoulders.
She couldn’t tell him she was a whore—he would throw her out of the house—so she lied again. “A—A mean stepfather who tried to take advantage of me so I ran away and joined up with the other orphans. I didn’t mean to fool you, Travis. I was just so scared and then I was afraid to tell you, afraid you’d be mad—”
“Mad! Missy, you don’t know what mad looks like until you’ve seen me really mad.” He snorted and turned to walk to the front window, his big boots stomping.
She stood there a minute, unsure whether to follow him or go back into her room. She had hoped that he would pull her into his embrace and stroke her hair. She had hoped he would whisper, “You know I’ll always take care of you, Violet. I love you.”
And she would lean her face against his brawny chest, her shoulders shaking with sobs. She would feel so safe and secure in his arms. No one or nothing could hurt her as long as she was held in Travis’s embrace. She would turn her face up to his and say, “I love you, Travis.”
“Hush, you don’t know what you’re saying. You’re scared and upset,” he would whisper as he put one finger under her small chin and lifted her face up to look down at her. “I reckon you had your reasons for fooling me and we’ll just start fresh, okay?”
“Sure.” She would look up at him, loving him as she had never loved anyone. Maybe they could go on from here without him ever finding out her past. Maybe he need never find that out. “I’ve wanted to kiss you for the longest time,” she would whisper.
“And damn it, me you.” He would bend his head and kiss her gently, a chaste, warm kiss that said: I love you and I will protect you and look out for you always.
She imagined she slipped her arms around his neck and molded herself against him as the kiss deepened. She could feel every inch of his hard body, including his aroused manhood throbbing against her, and she wanted him. She opened her lips and he plunged his tongue deep inside for a long moment as she breathed deeper. His hand slipped into the bodice of her dress and caressed her breast until her nipples grew taut with need and she moaned, urging him to go even further. “I want you,” he gasped, “and I need you.”
“Then take me,” she urged.
He would pick her up, looking down at her. “I’ve been hungering for you almost since I met you and beating myself up because you’re so young.”
“But now you know my real age.” She smiled up at him, her arms still around his neck.
“And I’d like to be your first man,” he whispered and turned toward her room.
Her first man. She couldn’t even remember her first man, but Travis need never know that. He was proud and if he knew her real past, she would lose him forever.
“Damn it!” Travis snapped. “Say something!”
That brought her out of her daydream abruptly. “I—I don’t know what else to say. I’ve told you what you asked.”
He scowled. “I got nothing to say to you, missy.” His face was stone cold. “You’re a lying little bitch.”
She stood on one foot and then the other. “Do you want me to leave?”
“And go where?” He snorted. “You haven’t got any money for a train ticket and I sure as hell don’t.”
“Maybe I could get a job and earn enough for a ticket.”
“Doing what?” He snorted.
She was certain she could get a job at the Cattle Drive Saloon, but she didn’t say that. “I just reckoned you wanted me to leave right away.”
“And have all this come out and have everyone laughing at me and teasing the kids?”
“You want things to go on just as they were?” She couldn’t believe it.
He shook his head and abruptly looked very tired. “I don’t have a better idea right now. Maybe later we’ll think of something.”
She swallowed hard. “All right, if that’s the way you want it.”
“It is and we don’t tell the kids.”
“All right.”
She heard noise from the back and the kids yelling and laughing as they came up on the back porch.
Travis glared at her. “You’d better get your shoes on.”
“Sure.” She ran for the bedroom as the kids entered the house. Violet began to braid her hair as she walked back into the living room. “Did you boys remember to milk the cow?”
“We did,” Houston said as they all entered.
Violet managed a smile. “Boys, if you’ll help me empty the washtub, I’ll fix some supper.”
Travis stood up. “I’ll do it. It’s too heavy for the boys.” He strode to the kitchen.
“Gosh,” Harold whispered, “what’s wrong with Travis?”
“Yes,” said Kessie, “he sounds like he could bite a nail in half.”
“Hush,” Violet whispered. “He’s angry.”
“Why?” Kessie asked.
“Never mind.”
The boys had gone to help Travis with the washtub and Violet went to put her shoes on. She didn’t know what would happen next. Maybe she should just crawl out the window tonight and try to hitch a ride on a passing wagon. She could probably find a job in a big saloon in Fort Worth or Dallas. The thought made her wince. She never wanted another man to touch her except Travis, and he hated her.
Travis came back in the house. “Maybe I can build a fire outside and we’ll do a little barbecue.”
Bonnie hugged Growler’s neck. “Doggie likes meat.”
“Good.” He glanced at Violet and she looked away, continuing to braid her hair.
Houston looked at Travis. “How was the buggy ride?”
“Buggy ride?” Travis looked blank. Evidently, Violet thought, he had forgotten all about it.
“You know,” Kessie said, “Mrs. Van Mayes, who’s wanting to marry you.”
Bonnie shook her blond curls. “Marry Violet instead.”
“Oh, I can’t do that,” Travis snapped and glared at Violet. “She’s much too young, aren’t you, missy?”
She gulped. “Of course.”
Just then, Kessie went into the hall. “Hey, what happened? Violet’s door is torn up.”
Violet tried to come up with an explanation, but nothing came. She looked at Travis.
“I did it,” he snapped. “The rest is nobody’s business. Forget about it, I’ll fix it later.”
Violet hurried toward the kitchen. “I’ll fix some potato salad and beans to go with the barbecue.”
She ran into the kitchen and leaned against the cabinet, shaking as the kids and Travis went out back, followed by the dog. If the kids had been a few minutes earlier, they would have seen the big fuss. Well, now that Travis knew her real age, what were they going to do? It didn’t seem realistic that they could go on as before when she loved him so much and he was a virile man with a man’s needs. And what did he intend to do about the eager Mrs. Van Mayes? What a mess, and Violet didn’t see any good way out of it except maybe to leave. Yes, that way, Travis could marry the rich widow and the kids would be taken care of. She’d have to make plans.
They ate the barbecue outside on the back lawn, the kids so busy talking they didn’t seem to notice that Travis and Violet hardly said a word. She heard the southbound train go by without stopping and wished she had the money to be on it, but there wasn’t any spare money in the house.
It occurred to her that she could wire Duke and he would send her money for the northbound train if she’d come back to him. Violet shuddered at the thought. She’d rather be dead than return to the Diamond Horseshoe. Yet later, in the house about dusk when she heard the northbound train come through, she went to the parlor window and watched it pull into the station, pick up some freight and move on. Almost anything would be better than sharing a house with a man she loved who wouldn’t even speak to her and now would never trust her again.
“What are you looking at?” Travis came to her side.
“The northbound train.”
He was standing so close, she could almost feel the heat from his big body. Their arms brushed and the hairs on her arm seemed to stand up and she longed to have him put his arm around her, but of course, he did not.
“You thinking about taking it?” His chest brushed against her back.
“Maybe, but as you said, we don’t have the money.” She wanted to turn around and put her arms around his neck, but she knew he would push her away and rebuff her and she couldn’t bear to be hurt like that. Besides, the kids might see it.
“Checkers,” Harold said behind them. “Who’s up for checkers?”
Travis turned away from the window. “Reckon I am.”
She was shaking from having stood so close to him. She didn’t see how she could continue to live here, loving him like she did and knowing he hated her. “I—I think I’ll pop some corn. Who wants popcorn?”
A chorus of shouts went up behind her, all the kids offering to help, and she went into the kitchen, eager to have something to do to pass the time.
While Travis and Harold settled down with the checkerboard, Violet and the others went into the kitchen. She stoked up the old iron stove and got out her big skillet. “Now you kids watch out—I don’t want anyone to get burned.”
The kids and the dog gathered around the stove while she got out the grease and the can of popcorn. “Here’s how you do it, see? You get the oil hot and put in the corn, then you keep sliding the skillet back and forth to keep the corn from burning until it pops.”
In minutes, she had a savory skillet full of popcorn. “Now we’ll add a little butter and salt.” She put it in a bowl and carried it into the living room, where Travis and Harold were playing checkers.
Kessie laughed. “We’re like a real family, aren’t we?”
Travis looked at Violet and frowned. “Sure. Just like a real family.”
She didn’t like the way he was glaring at her. The children all dived into the popcorn with both hands.
“I’ll make some more,” she said and hurried back to the kitchen. She had thought his anger might fade, but he still seemed as furious as ever. As she started popping corn again, all she could think of was the coldness of Travis’s dark face. In thinking about that, she wasn’t paying enough attention to the skillet and she grabbed the iron handle and then shrieked in pain.
Immediately, children surrounded her and she heard the checkerboard being overturned as Travis got up and came into the kitchen. “What the hell’s happening?”
“Her burned herself,” Bonnie sobbed. “Feathers burned.”
“I’m okay,” Violet lied, but she was shaking as she plunged her hand into a bucket of cold water.
She couldn’t hold back the tears as she held out her blistered hand.
“Damn it, how could you be so careless?” Travis reached for the butter and took her hand gently.
She looked up at him, tears in her eyes. “I—I was thinking about other things.”
“Sit down,” he ordered, “and you kids back away.”
“Is she okay?” Kessie asked.
Travis was holding Violet’s hand and she closed her eyes as he examined her burned fingers. “I think she’ll be okay. Houston, get a clean rag and I’ll wrap it up.”
Violet tried to blink away the tears without any luck.
Travis stared at her, still holding her hand. “It hurt?”
“Not much,” she said.
“You know I hate liars,” he said as he smoothed the butter on her fingers with a gentle hand.
“I know,” and then she burst into tears.
“Gosh, she must really be hurt.” Harold’s almond eyes got big and round.
“Stop crying, missy,” Travis ordered softly. “You’re scaring the kids.”
She closed her eyes as he deftly put a bandage on her hand, holding it in the palm of his big one. “Are you all right now?”
She nodded.
“I think you’d better go to bed,” Travis said. “I can deal with the kids.”
“Are you sure?”
He snarled, “Go on to bed.”
She started down the hall. Behind her, she heard him telling the kids to put away the checkerboard and get ready for bed. Her hand was throbbing so she lay down on her bed fully clothed. Would he come see about her later? Was there any chance he cared anything at all for her? Of course not. Not only had she lied to him, but she couldn’t compete with the beautiful, rich widow. She might have no choice but to run away.
No, she shook her head stubbornly. If she turned tail and ran, the kids would be at the mercy of that woman and they would all be sent off to boarding or military schools. As smitten as Travis was with the widow, he could be convinced that it was all for their own good.
She lay there, listening. Gradually the house quieted down. After a while she heard the sound of Travis’s boots in the hall and he paused outside her door. She could see his big silhouette looming there. He knocked softly on the doorjamb, but she decided not to answer. She wasn’t sure what to say to him.
He came into her room and he stood there, looming as a big shadow across her bed. “Violet? Are you asleep?”
She wanted to say, “No, how can I sleep when you hate me and I love you?” but she didn’t say anything. She pretended to be asleep. If she answered or held out her arms to him, would he come into her room, kneel by her bed and embrace her, or continue the terrible row from this afternoon?
After a long moment, he sighed and walked on. She lay there listening to him walk down the hall to his room. Her hand had ceased throbbing and she wondered now what would have happened if she had answered. Would he have come in and made love to her no
w that he knew she was a grown woman? Most men couldn’t pass up an opportunity like that, but maybe he was saving his passion for Mrs. Van Mayes. There was no way to know his true feelings. It was a long time before she dropped off to sleep.
Travis turned restlessly in his bed. He had conflicting emotions toward Violet now that he knew her true age, and he wasn’t quite sure he believed everything she had told him. With Emily, he had had all the lying and ridicule he could take for one lifetime, and he didn’t intend to let a woman do that to him again. In his mind, he saw Emily as she left him, bragging about her handsome gambler with his fine frock coat and the diamond horseshoe pin on his necktie. He realized now that maybe he had never loved Emily as much as he had thought. It was only that he had had so much pride in winning her hand in marriage and had suffered so much humiliation when she left him.
He tried to focus his attention on the beautiful widow, who might be delighted if he changed his mind, but his thoughts kept returning to the naked girl with long brown hair standing by the washtub. His manhood came up and throbbed hard. He hadn’t had a woman in so long and there was a pretty little wench sleeping under the same roof with him. Immediately he felt like the worst kind of rascal. Yet he was a proud man and slow to forgive. The answer was to get enough money to buy Violet a train ticket and tell her to go away and never contact him again. He could marry the rich widow, and he and the kids could have an easy life with her.
And yet, when he finally managed to drift off to sleep, the warm thighs he dreamed of were Violet’s and in his sleep, his hot mouth sucked her small, pert breasts.
Chapter 17
The next morning, Violet was awakened by the children running from one room to the other, laughing and playing tag. Little Bonnie and the dog both jumped on her bed, giggling and Growler licking her face. “Pancakes!” Bonnie shouted. “Want pancakes!”
“All right, I’ll get up.” Violet smiled as she swung her feet over the edge of the bed and sat there a moment as the toddler and the dog romped on through the house. She heard Travis banging around in the kitchen and she hurriedly dressed and went there. “I’m sorry, I must have overslept,” she murmured as he looked up.
Travis Page 23