by J. E. Parker
Just seeing him hurt.
So many emotions coursed through me but I could only process one—anger.
I opened my mouth to speak, to yell, to curse him to the end of the earth and back. I wanted to smack him, wanted to hit him, wanted to grab him by his damn hair and shake him until his eyes rolled back in his head.
But I couldn’t do any of that.
I was angry because he left me, but I was more pissed that he was back.
Why the hell now?
Six years he’d looked for me? I didn’t believe it. He could have found me if he’d tried. After all, I’d practically stalked him for over four months when he first dumped me.
I called.
I emailed.
I texted.
Every. Single. Friggin’. Day!
And I got nothing in return!
This selfish son of a bitch! How dare he? How friggin’ dare he walk out of my life and turn his back on me when I needed him the most—I blew out a breath—and then come back when it was convenient for him!
If I could’ve told him to go fuck himself, I would have.
But I couldn’t so I just glared.
If only I could punch him… I’d never hit anybody in my life, but at that moment, Hendrix Cole made one hell of a tempting target.
More tears rolled down my eyes, and that just pissed me off more.
I was so sick of crying!
“Baby, please quit crying.” He wiped away the tears and my skin burned from his touch. “Tell me what’s wrong.”
I needed him to move, needed him to get away.
I closed my eyes and parted my lips. “Hurts.” My voice was small, quiet, barely a whisper, but I managed to push the word out.
Hendrix nodded once before reaching for the remote attached to the hospital bed. “I’ll get the nurse in here to give you some meds.”
The big dummy! I wasn’t talking about physical pain—even if it felt like someone was ripping my heart straight from my chest—I was talking about emotional pain. The same emotional pain that he’d caused.
With long, skilled fingers, he pushed the call button on the side of the bed, and a woman’s all too chipper voice came over the speaker. “How can I help you?”
Hendrix’s eyes never left mine as he replied, “Madelyn Davis in room 417 is awake. I need her doctor to get in here, and I need the nurse to bring her something for the pain.”
The voice replied, “I’ll let them know right away.”
“They’re coming, pretty girl.”
Suddenly, I hated that name. I’d love it my all my life, but not anymore.
Hearing him say it now, after all these years, made my stomach churn.
Pretty girl, my ass. If I was such a pretty girl then why did he stop loving me in the first place?
Hendrix lowered his brows as I glared at him. He didn’t say anything, but I hoped that he was receiving the message that I was trying to send loud and clear: I may still love you but I sure as heck don’t like you, asshole.
Seconds later, the door to my room opened, and a man wearing plain green scrubs and a woman wearing pink scrubs decorated with penguins—no, I’m not kidding—breezed into the room. “It’s nice of you to join us, Miss Davis,” the man, my doctor I assumed, said as he reached over my head and retrieved a flashlight looking instrument from the wall. He tapped it on the palm of his left hand twice before asking, “How are you feeling?”
I didn’t have a chance to try to respond before Hendrix spoke up. “I think she’s having a hard time talking.”
The doctor nodded. “I’m sure her mouth and throat are dry. Cindy,” he looked over at the nurse who was standing on the opposite side of my bed, “can you get her some ice chips to help with that? If she does okay with the chips, then we’ll move on to other fluids.” He leaned over and placed the flashlight looking thing inches from my face. “I’m just going to check your eyes.” Holding my eyes open with his fingers, he shined the light over my pupils.
Instant friggin’ pain.
“I’m sorry, Miss Davis, I can imagine your eyes are a bit sensitive right now.” No duh. Ya think, doc? He held open my second eye and repeated the step. I couldn’t hold back my flinch. “Eyes look good. Pupils are responding appropriately.”
I could feel Hendrix’s eyes on me, but I didn’t look in his direction.
I was still angry at him, but I knew that wouldn’t last. Before long the rage would morph into soul-crushing agony. It’d happened before, it’d happen again.
The doctor continued examining me as the nurse slid a syringe into my IV line. “This will help with the pain,” she said with a smile on her face.
Hope it’s a horse sedative. That’s the only thing that will help me right now.
The doctor stood straight and leaned his right hip against the rail of my bed. “Overall, you look good considering the events that landed you here.” He paused before continuing. “Do you remember anything that happened?” I shook my head.
He nodded once. “At this point, that’s completely normal. You’ll eventually remember.” After seeing the confusion that I felt plastered on my face, he continued. “Miss Davis, you’ve suffered a skull fracture,” he pointed behind his ear, “right about here. Luckily, with a combination of three different medications, we were able to keep your cerebral edema under control—there should be no lasting effects. However, you may experience frequent headaches and an acute sensitivity to light, coupled with intermittent nausea over the next couple of months.”
I didn’t understand. “How?” My voice was hoarse, my throat raw as I spoke.
The dick, AKA Hendrix, was the one to answer me. “You were attacked outside of the shelter.”
“Who?” A million different questions bounced around in my head. Who would attack me? I wasn’t a confrontational person, and I never caused anyone any problems.
“Colin O’Bannon.”
Oh no! Clara… The boys…
Hendrix must have read the look on my face because he continued, “They’re safe, Maddie. Colin didn’t get to them.” Thank you, God. “Won’t be getting near them again either.” Huh? “Evan shot him, baby. He’s dead.”
The pounding in my head lessened, and my eyelids grew heavy as the pain medicine took effect. “Dead?”
“Dead as dead can be.”
Right or wrong, I smiled.
They were safe. Clara, Liam, and Declan were safe.
Feeling weightless, I closed my eyes and drifted off to sleep.
Maddie
It had been two days since I woke up from a coma.
Coma. Something I never thought I’d experience.
Just the thought of it made me want to gag.
“Maddie, honey, are you sure you aren’t hungry?”
"I'm fine, Grandmama," I lied, as I flipped through a Better Homes & Garden magazine. I wasn't hungry, and just the thought of having to chew and swallow something made my stomach twist in a million knots.
“Maddie,” she sighed, “You haven’t had a bite to eat since you woke up.”
I shrugged. “Have you seen my butt lately? I could stand to lose a few pounds.” Besides, I’d eaten two Jell-O cups. That counted as food, right?
“Don’t you ever let me hear you say that shit again.” I closed my eyes at the sound of Hendrix’s voice. I hadn’t even heard him come in. The man was built like a linebacker but was quieter than a mouse. “Maddie,” he called out my name, “look at me.”
Don’t look at him! Don’t look at him! Don’t look at him!
“Son of a bitch,” he cursed under his breath as he moved across the room to stand beside my hospital bed. Placing his hand under my chin, he tilted my head back. Being the brat that I am, I closed my eyes. “Maddie,” he growled, “open your damn eyes—now.”
Nope. Not happening.
“If you don’t open your eyes and look at me I swear to God, I will take you over my knee.” My eyes popped open. “Glad I got your attention. Now if I ever hear you
say some self-depreciating shit like that again, I will spank your ass. Understand me?”
I rolled my eyes, and for the first time in two days, I replied to him. "If your hand comes anywhere near my butt, I'll use Grandmama's shotgun and shoot you in your ass. Understand me? You lost the privilege to touch me when you broke my friggin’ heart!” I jerked my chin out of his hand and hissed as nausea swamped me. Damn him for making me move like that! “And I’d appreciate it if you remembered that.”
Bitch mode fully activated.
He tightened his jaw and inhaled so deeply his nostrils flared. “You'll eat supper. Either you tell me what you want, or I’ll choose for you. Either way, you’re getting food in your stomach. Don’t care if I’ve gotta shove it down your throat.”
This asshole!
I opened my mouth to give him a piece of my mind but stopped when the door to my hospital room opened and a little head popped around the corner. My anger evaporated. “Declan,” I extended my arms, “come here, buddy.”
He didn’t hesitate in running to me and climbing up on the bed. Crawling into my lap, he slid his little arms around my ribs. “I missed you, Miss Madelyn.”
Holding him as close as possible, I rocked him against me. “Oh honey,” I choked back a sob as I buried my face in his lavender scented hair, “I missed you too. So much.”
I looked up and spotted Liam and Clara standing by the door.
Liam looked like he wanted to come to me but he was hesitating. "Hey, little guy. Aren't you going to hug me? I sure missed the heck out of you."
He stepped closer. “I don’t wanna hurt you.”
I unwrapped one of my arms from around Declan and gestured for him to get his rear end over to me. “You’re not going to hurt me, baby. I’m made of steel, remember?”
One second passed. Then two. Then three.
He finally crossed the room, climbed up on the bed, and sat next to me. I pulled him to my side and kissed the top of his head. “It’s been far too long since I had one of your special hugs.”
He tilted his head back and looked up at me. “Dat’s cause you’re here and not at home.”
He frowned and took in my face. I’m sure I looked frightening. I’d refused to look in the mirror since waking up, but from what the neurologist had said, the bruising under my eyes and behind my ear was all normal. Not to mention the bruising and swelling along the entire left side of my face where Colin had landed most of his punches.
Just thinking about him made the volcano in the pit of my belly churn.
Don’t think about him now!
I squeezed Liam against me. "Well, it's a good thing that you came to see me then. I was about to go crazy without you two little turkeys.”
Gently, I rocked them both in my lap. Then, I looked over to the door where Clara still stood. "Hey, beautiful lady." She smiled at me, but I didn't miss the tears filling her eyes. "How are you doing?"
Her gaze dropped to the floor. “I’m okay.” She paused, then continued. “Madelyn, I’m so sor—”
"Don't say it." I forced a smile. "There's no need, trust me." If she apologized to me for something that her piece of a crap husband did, then I'd scream. "It's not your fault, Clara."
She looked up. “But it is. If I hadn’t—”
I cut her off. “Nope. You’re not responsible for someone else’s actions. It’s as simple as that.”
Declan tugged on the front of my gown. “What happened to your face?”
Time to lie, lie, lie…
Liam nor Declan knew the truth about what had happened to me, and I sure wouldn't be the one to tell them. I didn’t want them to feel bad about what their father had done. Like I’d told Clara, it wasn’t their guilt to carry.
“Well,” I said, smiling, “you are not going to believe this.”
Declan’s eyes widened—almost comically—as he and Liam both gazed up at me. "Remember how I told you guys that you shouldn't run down the ramp because it gets slippery when wet?" They both nodded. "Well guess who ran down the ramp right after it rained."
Declan smiled. “You did!”
I sighed. “I did. And guess who slipped and fell face first onto the concrete?”
Declan screamed, “You,” while jabbing a finger in my face.
“Yep, me. How silly was I? I mean sheesh!”
Liam smacked his forehead and laughed. “Dat’s why you don’t run in flippy floppy shoes!”
Hendrix chuckled, and I couldn't stop myself from looking up and smiling at him. How many times had he gotten pissed at me for wearing flip-flops over the years? Too many to count.
"That is exactly why you don't run in flip-flops." I looked at Liam then Declan. "Let this be a lesson to you both. Only run in sneakers. M'kay? And no running on wet concrete—ever!"
“Okie-dokie!” Liam shouted.
“Okie-dokie?” I replied. “You’ve been spending time with Shelby, haven’t you?
He nodded. “I like Shelby. She’s pretty, and she smells good.”
I gasped in mock outrage. “Why Liam O’Bannon! You sneaky little snake! Are you two-timing me?”
His eyes widened, and he smiled. “Nope! You’re both too old for me.”
“Oh, you little…” my voice trailed off as I tickled his ribs. He flopped backward and laughed his little heart out. The sound made my head feel like it was splitting in half, but I didn’t care. I’d endure whatever pain was necessary to hear his melodic laughter.
Liam pointed at me with a sneaky grin on his face. “When you have a daughter imma marry her!”
Oh, Lord.
I don't know why I did it, but I glanced over at Hendrix. His arms were crossed over his chest, and he was staring at Liam with raised brows.
His eyes met mine, and my heart broke a little.
We were supposed to have babies and raise a family.
“Well,” I said, looking back down at Liam, “if I ever have a daughter, you have my permission to marry her,” I paused before adding, “if that’s what she wants.”
I could’ve sworn, I heard Hendrix mutter, “you will,” under his breath, but I couldn’t be sure.
Liam nodded once. "Good. Imma catches her frogs for presents, and imma kiss her every day."
My eyes met Clara’s. “You’re in trouble in a few years.”
She just smiled. “Don’t I know it.”
For the next two hours, all of us sat around chatting about everything under the sun. Well, everyone but Hendrix chatted. He just sat in the corner with his arms crossed over his chest and watched me.
It made me feel like an animal on exhibit at the zoo.
“We should get out of here. It's getting close to the boy's bedtime," Clara said as she stood from the small chair where she'd been sitting beside Grandmama.
Pouting, I stuck out my lower lip and looked at both boys. “You guys have to promise to come back and see me soon. If you don't, I'm gonna cry."
Both wrapped their little arms around me and squeezed. “We’ll be back before ya know it,” assured Declan.
Liam kissed me on the cheek before climbing down from the bed.
What he did next surprised the heck out of me.
Straightening his spine, he placed his little fists on his hips and stomped across the room until he was standing in front of Hendrix. Tilting his head back, he stared up at him. “Are you Hen-dicks?” I may have laughed at his mispronunciation of Hendrix’s name.
Hendrix squatted so they were close to being on eye level. “Yeah, buddy, I am.”
Liam narrowed his eyes. “Miss Shelby told Miss Hope dat you made Miss Madelyn cry.” He leaned forward. “I don’t like dat you made her cry.”
Hendrix hesitated in responding. He glanced at me before meeting Liam’s eyes again. “I don’t like making her cry.”
Liam stomped a foot. “So, don’t do it no more!”
Clara, Grandmama, and I just watched as the five-year-old who a week ago was scared to even speak to me, stood up to a man four times
his size, to defend me.
“I’ll try my best not too.”
Liam nodded once. “Good. Cause if you do imma kick you in da knee.”
With that parting shot, he stomped off and stood next to Clara.
I barely held back the laughter threatening to burst free.
Eyes wide, Clara looked at me and waved. “I’ll see you later, Madelyn. Feel better, sweetheart.”
I waved back. “Bye, beautiful lady.” Then I waved at the boys. “You two behave.”
They replied simultaneously. “We’ll try!”
Pure trouble… both of them!
Grandmama stood from her chair as Clara and the boys walked out of the door. "It's about time for me to go as well. Supper ain't gonna fix itself, and God knows your Daddy will starve to death if I don't make him something."
Speaking of Daddy…
“Grandmama,” I said, my voice full of pain. “Why hasn’t Daddy come by much?” I didn’t understand it. I mean, I knew he was probably upset because according to Evan, I went outside by myself and gave Colin the perfect opportunity to attack me, but I didn’t think he’d be mad enough to keep his distance from me. Call me crazy, but I thought he'd be up my butt during my recovery. Instead, he'd been a ghost. Yeah, he'd come by, but even when he was here, he seemed so far away.
I didn’t get it.
Grandmama sighed. "Maddie, sweetheart, this is a rough time for your Daddy.”
That wasn’t an excuse. “And it isn’t for me? I mean, I’m the one with the broken head and all.”
She walked over to me and placed her hand on the non-hurt side of my face. “That’s not what I meant, sweetheart.” She smiled down at me, but I didn't miss the way her eyes glossed over. "You being hurt nearly scared a decade off his life, and seeing you laying in that hospital bed," she closed her eyes and shook her head, "it set him back twenty-four years, and dredged up all sorts of feelings that he’s having a hard time processing.”
“What do you mean it set him back twenty-four years?”
Grandmama ran a finger down my cheek. “You’re the spitting image of your mama, Maddie. When your Daddy saw you hurt and hooked up to all those monitors, it sent him into a tailspin. He’s having a hard time balancing the pain from the past with the fear from the present.”