by Li Yu
"Dear heart," she said to Vesperus. "I am not very strong and I can't stand any more of this battering. Hold me in your arms and let's try to get some sleep."
Vesperus did as she asked; he dismounted, lay beside her, and took her in his arms. As he lay there, he was conscious of a strange scent emanating from the bed, the same scent he had noticed on first meeting her.
"Dearest," he asked, "what is this exotic scent you perfume your clothes with? It's so delightful."
"I don't use any scent. When did you notice it?"
"That day we met, when you walked past me. And I noticed it again just now, while lying beside you. If you don't perfume your clothes, where does it come from?"
"It's nothing exotic, just a scent that comes from inside. You're quite wrong about it."
"I don't believe that any scent from inside you could have such a nice bouquet to it. If so, your body must be a treasure too."
"It's the one real asset I have, something that no other woman possesses. I'm told that at my birth, just before I appeared, a rosy cloud wafted into the room and everyone noticed an exotic scent. Then, when I came along, the cloud dispersed but not the scent, which was often found issuing from me. It was on the strength of this that I was given the name Cloud of Scent. If I sit quietly, the scent is barely perceptible, but if I exert myself and start sweating, it comes from my pores. When that happens, not only are others aware of it, I can sense it myself. Since I have this asset, I don't like to conceal it either. That day in the temple when we met, you looked so terribly handsome that I lingered a while and made eyes at you and left you my fan as a token. I was hoping you would come and seek me out so that I could offer you this scent for your appreciation, but to my great disappointment you never came. Only now do I get my wish."
Vesperus sniffed her body carefully all over and found that each pore gave off a wisp of scent, which convinced him that the most beautiful women are not to be chosen solely on the basis of their visual appeal, just as heroes are not to be judged solely by their physique. Clasping her in a tight embrace, he called her dearest several dozen times, until Cloud broke in: "Have you smelt me all over?"
"Yes."
"I'm afraid there's one place you've missed."
"No, I didn't miss anywhere."
"Yes, you did. You missed one place, where the scent differs from everywhere else. I might as well offer that for your appreciation too.
"Where is it?"
Cloud took one of his fingers in her hand and touched her vulva with it. "The smell in here is different again," she said. "If it's not asking too much, why not sniff it and see?"
Vesperus crouched down and gave several deep sniffs before scrambling up again.
"What a treasure! There's nothing more to be said, I shall love you forever!" With that, he crouched down again, parted that supreme treasure, and began licking it.
"Don't do that! It's too much! It'll be the death of me!" As she spoke, she tried to pull him up, but the harder she pulled the more furiously he licked. Using his three-inch tongue like a penis, he went back and forth, thrusting and withdrawing as in real copulation. When he sensed her fluid coming, he drew it into his mouth, gulping it down without losing a drop, after which he kept on until she spent, when he even swallowed her essence. Only then did he get up and lie on top of her again.
Cloud hugged him tightly. "Dear one, why do you love me so? There's nothing more for me to say either. I shall love you forever, too. If you truly love me, let's take a vow tonight."
"Just what I was going to suggest." They got out of bed, dressed, and took a vow before the moon and stars, praying that, among other things, "Not only may we never part in this existence, but in the next one, too, let us be husband and wife."
Then they took their clothes off again and climbed back into bed, where they began confiding their innermost secrets."
In my opinion," said Vesperus, "there's not another woman in the world to equal you. I don't know how many virtuous lives your husband needed to be blessed with such a supreme treasure. But since he has this treasure at home, why doesn't he stay and enjoy it instead of spending all his time elsewhere, leaving you to sleep on your own? What possible reason could he have?"
"In spirit," said Cloud, "he would like to enjoy it, but he hasn't the strength, so he uses his teaching as a pretext for staying away and avoiding his duties."
"He's still only middle-aged, as I understand. Why is he so weak?"
"In his youth he was a rake who had one affair after another. Day and night he'd be off wenching. He wasted his powers so badly that now, in middle age, he's quite useless."
"How would you compare his capacity in his youth with mine tonight?"
"Much the same in point of technique, but he never had those two special features of yours."
"Mine is unique, and so is yours. Now that our two treasures have fit together, we must see that they never part. From now on I shall be over to sleep with you all the time."
"But you have a wife! How can you be over all the time? I'll be quite satisfied so long as you're not as heartless as you were before."
"I don't know what scandalmonger has been filling your ears with gossip and leaving me without a chance to defend myself. You're still saying I'm heartless. If I knew who it was that told you, I'd go and have it out with him!"
"To tell you the truth," said Cloud, "it was those three women."
"This is getting stranger and stranger! They should have been offended to hear such a nasty remark! How can they be so shameless as to repeat it?"
"To be frank with you, it all began with my telling them. We belong to the same family, and I call the two younger ones sister and the older one aunt. We are all on good terms, and the two sisters and I are particularly close, as close as real sisters, and keep no secrets from each other. Well, that day after I got back from the temple I told them how handsome you were, how you kept stealing glances at me, and how I fell in love with you and left you my fan. They said, 'Since he's so much in love with you and knows you fancy him, he's bound to come looking for you. How are you going to send him away?' I, too, fully expected you to come looking for me, and I waited at the gate for ten days without a sign of you.
"Then, on their return from the temple, they came to visit me and asked, 'What did he look like, that man you saw the other day? What was he wearing?' I gave them a detailed description. 'In that case,' they said, 'we've just met the man you love.' Then they asked, When he fell for you, did he kowtow, by any chance?' I replied, He had to keep his feelings hidden, of course. How could he possibly kowtow in front of all those people?' They said nothing, just looked at each other and smiled in a smug, secretive sort of way. That aroused my suspicions, and I questioned them closely until they told me in great detail, smiling all the while, how you had kowtowed to them.
"There was something awfully superior about their attitude that upset me for days. This is how my thoughts went: 'He was meeting them for the first time too. Why was he so afraid of scandal when he saw me that he didn't even bow once, whereas with them he went wild and kowtowed quite brazenly? Obviously my looks don't compare with theirs and, equally obviously, my luck doesn't equal theirs either.' If you were going to seek anyone out, you'd seek out the ones you'd kowtowed to. You wouldn't come looking for me!
"So I cut my love for you out of my heart and never went back to the gate. But I was constantly on the lookout to see if you came searching for them. Normally we are the closest of sisters, but because of this incident I began to resent them, and that was why, when we met today and you said you had waited six months before paying any attention to me, I couldn't help suspecting them. Only when you swore all those terrible oaths did I realize that nothing of the kind had occurred. This whole comedy was kowtowed into existence by you. Tell me: do you think you were right to do it?"
"With this injustice on your mind," said Vesperus, "no wonder you flared up. But since they're your sisters, they must be my sisters-in-law, and you ought to
let me see them. All I have in mind is to address them as sisters-in-law and let them know that you and I are lovers. They put you down with their story about my kowtowing, so let me return the favor by putting them down, not just with these kowtows but with our lovemaking as well. How does that appeal to you?"
"There's no need for that. We're not only sisters, we've also sworn to share each other's fortunes, for better or for worse. If they had deceived me about this, they would be at fault. But since they didn't break their vow, if I now break mine and keep you for my own enjoyment, I will be the one at fault, and I couldn't bear that. When I see them, I shall have to explain things and impress on them that they mustn't forget the fish trap once they've caught the fish and try to one-up me or make me jealous. After that I'll bring you out and introduce you, to let them know that this marvelous creature is here for everyone's appreciation. That's what is meant by the saying, 'The treasures of the world ought to be shared with the people of the world.'
"There is just one thing. I want to impress on you that once you have those women, you're not to go changing your feelings for me. You must go on being just as loving to me as you were tonight. You must swear me another oath that you'll never switch."
Jubilant, Vesperus somersaulted off the bed and addressed an even more terrible oath to Heaven and Earth, then climbed back in and began making love all over again. It was as if the two wedding receptions had been rolled into one and both the matchmaker and the in-laws invited. Don't you suppose the matchmaker got drunk and the ladies ate their fill? After the lovers had finished, they slept entwined in each other's arms until dawn, when Cloud sent Vesperus home over his wooden bridge. From then on they met every day and slept together every night, and their love was deeper than that of husband and wife.
We do not yet know when the two sisters will fall into his hands. But enough has been said of Vesperus's infatuation with sex, all the way from Chapter Two onward. Let us now pause for the space of a chapter or so and take up a different subject altogether. Of course after another scene or two of this comedy have been played out, the male lead will reappear on stage.
CRITIQUE
There is nothing in fiction more remarkable than The Carnal Prayer Mat and nothing in The Carnal Prayer Mat more remarkable than this chapter. When you first read of Cloud's outburst, you are upset; you have no idea of its cause and you suspect the author of deliberately piling up difficulties and dangers in order to make the reader nervous. Only when you reach the final part do you realize that the previous section was perfectly reasonable and logical and not in the least contrived.
Before Cloud became Vesperus's lover, she was consumed by a baseless envy and so, after sharing her bed with him, should she not have felt a justifiable jealousy? This is a common characteristic of women and a familiar gambit in fiction. But not only is she not jealous, she even takes pride in playing the celestial matchmaker and bringing three remarkable destinies together.
By this time the reader is so far along the Shanyin road that he would not have time even to accept a summons from the Palace! [66] Just see what triumphs Vesperus is enjoying!
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
To purge his hatred, he smashes his pots and pans and burns his boat; [67] To avenge adultery, he sleeps on woodpiles and sups on gall.
Poem:
As the Spring and Autumn Annals stressed revenge, [68]
I dare to write a novel in similar vein.
The historian Dong Hu never touched on sex, [69]
While the Zheng-Wei songs have left no moral stain. [70]
A poem on lust will chill the lustful heart,
And a tale of lechery hold the lecher back.
Two former enemies will meet once more,
But somewhere else than on the narrow track.
Let us tell how Honest Quan gave up work after the sale of his wife, partly because he was seething with rage and partly because he could no longer face the public. Instead he spent his days sitting morosely at home, grilling the eleven-year-old maid as to when his wife had begun sleeping with the big fellow and whether anyone else had assisted him.
At first the maid was too afraid of her mistress's spite to tattle, but now that her mistress had been sold and would presumably not be returning, she revealed everything, from the dates when Fragrance and her lover had begun and ended their affair to the fact that the ugly neighbor had come over and slept with the lover too. She also revealed that it was not the big fellow who was the lover, but a handsome young man instead. In fact the big fellow had been assisting the young man, rather than the other way around.
At this news Quan's heart raced, and he promptly went out and asked the neighbors.
"Yes," they replied, "there was a handsome young man, but he came only once, unlike the Knave, who was back and forth all the time. Besides, the Knave is a proud man who would let others serve him but would not agree to serve them. He would never act for anyone else."
They were all in the dark until Fragrance married Vesperus, when the story got out and they learned of the deception. Once Quan knew the truth, he made inquiries about Vesperus's background and discovered that he was a stranger with a wife back home who had taken Fragrance as his concubine.
If the Knave had been acting in his own behalf, he thought, I would never think of appealing this wrong or of taking revenge. I'd have no choice but to put up with it in this life and settle accounts with him in the courts of Hell. But since someone else is responsible, how can I bear the rage I feel? I have to think of some way of getting even. He's not going to get away with it! If I take him to court, he'll have the Knave's help, for one thing, which means he'll have plenty of money to spend. Officials these days are always ready to do favors, and the Knave has only to ask them for one and I've lost. And secondly, the verdict in a marriage suit depends on the evidence of the middlemen, and the neighbors are so afraid of the Knave that they'll never speak up for me. So that's a blind alley.
The other ideas that occur to me are either unworkable or else unlikely to bring me satisfaction. The only solution is to go to the place he comes from, visit his home, work my way by hook or by crook into the household, and debauch his wife a few times. Now that would do my heart good! He debauched my wife, so I'll debauch his, paying back wrong for wrong, as they say. Even killing him wouldn't give me as much pleasure as that. "Where there's a will there's a way," as the saying goes. So long as you persevere, there's nothing you can't do. Everyone for miles around knows he seduced my wife before marrying her, and I imagine that the talk behind my back is none too pleasant. If I don't take revenge, I'll never be able to go on living here anyway, even without this injustice on my mind. Now that he has that slut of mine, I don't suppose he'll be returning home, so I'll seize the chance to go there myself: Perhaps Heaven isn't blind but will manifest its retribution and help me."
After deciding on a course of action, he sold the maid and all his furniture and effects for cash, which he combined with the hundred and twenty taels of the bride price and his trading capital. Then he took leave of his neighbors and set off, smashing his pots and pans and burning his boat.
After days of travel he arrived at his destination and put up at an inn while he found out where the house was situated and collected as much information about the family's activities as he could. Before he arrived, vengeance had seemed as simple a thing as fishing something out of his pocket, and he had scarcely given it a thought. But after finding where the house was situated and learning something of the family, he realized how difficult his task was going to be and began to worry.
He had assumed that the women's quarters in other men's houses would all be like his own; while the men were at home, the wives were naturally under strict control, but when they were away, it was as if the doors had no latches and the houses no inhabitants; anyone could go in and out at will. Little did he realize that intellectuals' families are quite different from merchants' families; only close relatives and intimate friends are allowed to cross their
thresholds. And this family was different again from other intellectuals' families; not even close relatives and intimate friends were allowed to enter their house. Quan was in a quandary: It looks as if what I have in mind may not be possible, after all, he thought, but since I've embarked on this plan, I'm going to do my level best to carry it out. If I fail, it will be a sign of Heaven's will. After this long and difficult journey, even if I can't see how to bring it off, I'm not going to be scared away by the name Iron Door.
He was hoping to rent a room nearby where he could stay while awaiting his chance, but Iron Door's house was isolated, with open land all around it. If a married man could not have moved in next door, what chance did a bachelor from another part of the country have to settle there and carry on a seduction? Realizing there was nothing for him to rent, he set off back to his inn. But before he had gone fifty yards, he saw a wooden noticeboard nailed to a big tree beside Iron Door's house. It appeared to contain a message. Quan went over and found that there was indeed a message on it, in bold characters:
UNTILLED LAND FOR CULTIVATION
FIRST CROP RENT-FREE
Quan looked all around him; there was nothing but heath as far as the eye could see. It must be this land here, he thought. Whoever owns it, there has to be a tenant's cottage to go with it. That would be the ideal place to rent. I'd be living close by and, on the pretext of working the land, I could keep an eye on what is happening over there.
At a nearby house he asked, "Who is the owner of the untilled land? Would there be a cottage for the tenant to rent?"
"The owner's name is Master Iron Door," came the reply, "and he lives in that isolated house over there. But there's no cottage that goes with the land. He expects the tenant to find his own lodgings."
"I'm thinking of breaking the land in for him," said Quan, "and I'm wondering what kind of landlord he is."
The other shook his head. "The most impossible man in the world! If he were easier to deal with, that land would have been rented long ago."