by Sharp, Tracy
Jack stood in front of the white board, looking at his jotted notes. “Does this seem like Gabriel to you?”
I shook my head. “I don’t know.”
He turned to look at me. “You spent some time with him, Kicks. What does your gut tell you?”
I felt sick deep in my soul, and just wanted to crawl into a ball and cry, but it wasn’t my style. I looked at Lucas, who was leaning against Jack’s desk, watching me. Those grey eyes waiting for an answer. “My gut tells me that this isn’t his style.”
“Okay,” Lucas said. “Why not?”
“Too messy for him, he’s cruel but not vicious in that way. Not like this.” I thought of Gabriel, his face more pretty than handsome. “He’s more into deception and manipulation, he’d wait until she’d given birth and then steal the baby in the night, telling the mother that the baby had died. If he wanted somebody dead, he’d just have them shot.”
“I think you’re right,” Lucas said. “This is the work of somebody who is desperate for a baby, willing to do anything to obtain one. The mother is just a method of getting a newborn. And the psychiatric literature suggests that the taking of the baby from the womb is fulfilling the perpetrator’s fantasy of giving birth herself.”
“So it’s a woman,” Jack said.
“In all of the cases of murder by c-section, women are the perpetrators of the crime, yes.” Lucas slowly turned his large paper coffee cup in his hands. “That doesn’t mean that a man isn’t involved. But usually in this kind of crime, the perpetrator is a woman acting alone.”
“Desperate measures,” I said. “She might’ve tried to take a baby before, right? What would she have done before to get her hands on an infant?”
“She likely would’ve tried abducting an infant. I’ll look into local infant abductions over the last few years.” Lucas leaned forward, slowly pushed himself from the desk. “But this could be our woman advertising to sell baby clothes.”
My cell phone rang. I looked at the number. It was Garrett Clemmons.
“Mr. Clemmons,” I said.
“Ms. Ryan.” His voice sounded tight and edgy. “Was that my wife out in that field this morning?” His tone went up on the last few words, panic barely contained.
I frowned. His fear was real. He really didn’t know if it was his wife that had been found dead. “We don’t know for sure. The police contacted you? Is that how you knew about the woman in the field?” I couldn’t say ‘dead body.’ I just couldn’t do it. It seemed to take away from Colleen as a person. She had been a person, a happy person, preparing to have a baby.
“Yes. They said they would call me if they needed me to identify the remains.” There was a quiver to his voice that went right through me.
As much of a dick this guy was, I couldn’t prolong his torture. “Dr. Clemmons, I don’t think it was Alexia.”
“You don’t.” There was a note of urgency in his tone now and a little hope.
“No, I don’t. I’m fairly certain that she didn’t have dark hair.”
“Okay,” he said, “Okay.”
“Sit tight, okay? Wait for the police to contact you again.”
“Thank you.” He disconnected.
I sighed. “Well, there goes one suspect in the disappearance of Alexia Clemmons.”
Jack raised his eyebrows.
I lifted a hand and dropped it back into my lap. “I don’t think the Dr. did it.”
“So you mean he really does think she was having an affair? He wasn’t making that shit up just to bash her?” Jack said.
“Maybe. He might’ve been making it up to justify his affairs. I don’t know. But he just sounded pretty upset that that woman out there in the field could be his wife.”
“Well, somebody made her disappear,” Jack said.
“Yes, and she hasn’t been found yet.” Lucas looked at the whiteboard, his eyes squinting.
Jack stood. “I have to go talk to Noel. Give her the news that her sister has been taken somewhere by Gabriel and we have no idea where they are. Jesus. Maybe she has an idea where he’d take them.”
“I’ll stay,” I said.
Lucas glanced at me. “I’ll stay with you.”
It’s what I was both afraid of and hoping he’d say.
Jack glanced at me, then at Lucas. Finally he dipped his head, grabbed up his brown leather jacket, and headed for the door, waving a hand behind him as he went. “I’ll see you in a bit.”
“Okay.” Lucas and I said it at the same time.
If I’d had trouble concentrating a few minutes ago, I really had become stupid by now. I could smell the musky scent of his aftershave from where I sat in my chair. I watched his toned back, his long legs, and his ass as he looked the white board over.
You could cut the sexual tension between us with a knife. I got up from my chair and walked over to the white board, standing beside him. Both of us looked at the board, and I was sure neither of us was really seeing what was on it.
This thing between us, this thick, sexual desire, was like a freight train. What happened next was inevitable.
I didn’t want to move away from him, but I knew that if I didn’t, we’d end up kissing. If I stood there one second longer, long enough for him to look at me, then we’d each acknowledge how much we wanted the other. In just that look, a half second before we moved together, closing the space and meeting each other’s lips.
I waited that second.
It took about thirty seconds before our clothes started falling. Another fifteen before we were on the floor. I felt the roughness of the carpet against the bare skin of my back and my ass. I spread my legs before he was even quite in between them, wrapping them around his. My hips moved against him, and our kisses were urgent and hungry, almost panicked. Neither of us said a single word, but when he slid into me I cried out and lifted my hips to meet him.
I held him close to me, wanting him crushing against my breasts. I needed the sensation, all of it, the smell, touch, the sound of his ragged breathing in my ear as he moved inside of me. I moved my hands over him and pulled him deeper into me. The sound of my moaning was far away, like it was coming from somebody else. This was my drink. My drug. My escape. Sex with Lucas was a numbing agent. For me, better than anything else for making me feel good and to forget, if only for a moment.
When he collapsed beside me, we both lay staring at the ceiling, taking in deep, breaths.
“Wow. Didn’t really see that coming,” Lucas said. “Not that I’m complaining.”
“Oh, come on. You didn’t see that coming? I saw it coming from a mile away.” I was still catching my breath.
“Well, maybe a little bit.” He grinned. “I’d hoped. I hadn’t expected it.”
I rolled onto my belly and rested my chin on my arm, watching him. He was handsome. He had a noble nose and thoughtful eyes. But handsome alone isn’t usually what gets my motor running. I wondered what exactly it was about him that made me want him so much. It was chemical, but it was also in the way he spoke, the way he moved. He was graceful in his movements without being feminine. He had gentle hands, with jogger’s legs, with long fingers. He was tall and lean, without being skinny. He was in amazing shape.
“You’re very nice to look at, you know that?” I felt the lopsided smile on my mouth.
He gave me a lazy smile of his own, his face flushing. “Thank you. I think you know that you’re more than nice to look at.”
“Why thank you, kind Sir.” I looked up at the white board, unable to help myself. I went quiet, my gaze moving over Jack’s scrawled handwriting.
“What is it, Leah? What do you see?” He closed his eyes, listening for my response.
“I don’t know. These women have to have been connected in some way other than just being pregnant. If the abductor is the same person, he or she had to have met them somewhere. Where?” I looked back at Lucas, marveling at how beautiful he looked right then, with his eyes closed.
He was silent for a moment, a
little line forming between his brows. “I’ve been thinking about that. Alexia was meeting her mother at the mall. Colleen worked down the road from the mall at a travel agency, and Daria is an attorney. The court house is within a mile of the mall. I’m willing to bet that he or she saw them at the mall.”
“Just happened upon them? Let’s say it’s a ‘she’ for the sake of argument. Was she waiting, hanging out in the food court or something, for a pregnant woman to happen by?”
“Maybe, serial killers troll for their victims of choice at places they know their victim type frequents.”
“Pregnant women frequent the baby sections of stores; clothes, diapers, infant paraphernalia. It wouldn’t be hard to find pregnant women at those places. There is a store that specifically sells baby clothes and items in the mall. Oh, Baby. There are also two department stores in that mall that sell baby items.”
“Right,” Lucas said, opening his eyes. “I’m sure she’s cruising places like that.”
“Maternity shops.” I sat up. “There is one maternity shop in that mall. I bet she’s hanging out at the maternity shop a lot. There’s even a bench in front of the store for tired pregnant women to sit and rest.”
“She could be disguised as a pregnant woman. Usually this type of killer is. They fake a pregnancy, tell everyone they know that they’re pregnant, and then abduct a pregnant woman who is close to term.”
“Christ. That is so creepy. Like a spider waiting for a fly.”
“Yes. She weaves an intricate web of deception. Almost certainly to save a failing relationship with a man, she thinks a baby will keep him with her.”
I made a face. I couldn’t relate to it. “It’s frightening to think of somebody being that needy. That would the worst kind of person to have a child.”
“Right. Her entire identity is wrapped up in her relationship. She’ll do anything to keep it. So she could be sitting on that bench waiting for a pregnant woman that strikes her fancy to come along, and then follow her into the parking lot. The police checked the video tapes from the days the women disappeared, but the tapes have been getting recorded over every twenty-four hours. They haven’t been changing them and saving them. Pretty archaic system, actually.”
“It’s kind of an old mall. They haven’t exactly done much in the way of renovations in recent years.” I sat up, suddenly feeling shy. I reached for my clothes and gingerly pulled them on.
Lucas did the same, which was a shame. I really loved looking at him without them.
“Lucas.” His name tasted delicious on my tongue. I stood watching him for a moment. My heart beat faster. An idea was forming in my mind.
“Yes?” he pulled up the zipper on his jeans and stood in front of me.
It was hard to think clearly with him standing there, still smelling hot and sweaty, and so close to me. “I have an idea.”
“I don’t doubt it.” He grinned. “Hit me with it. I’ve liked your ideas so far.”
***
“Are you sure about this?” Jack asked me.
It was a lucky thing that Lucas and I were dressed. He’d shown up about a minute after we’d pulled our clothes back on.
Lucas and I avoided looking at each other, being as casual as we could. It must’ve been like holding up a neon sign to Jack, because I could tell by the way his eyes flicked from Lucas to me that he knew exactly what had transpired between us.
“Very,” I said. “I’m going to make coffee. Be back in a minute.”
“I’ll help you,” Jack said.
Aw shit. I was in trouble.
He followed me into the kitchen. When we were safely out of earshot he scolded me. “Jesus, Kicks. I can’t leave you alone for five minutes.”
“What?” I asked, my eyes wide and innocent, or so I thought.
“Oh, stow it. You know what.” He placed his hands on his hips as he leaned slightly forward, staring at me. He was clearly not amused.
“Jack, lighten up. Some people have a few cocktails to relax. Others spark up a big fatty. I…find a friend.”
“You have a friend. Or have you forgotten that?”
I leaned against the counter. “Jack, please don’t go there. Don’t lecture me.”
He let out a long breath, walking toward the kitchen window and back again. “Fine. Just please don’t let it get in the way of the work. Okay? Can you manage to keep your brain out of your panties?”
“It’s a thong, but I’ll sure give it a whirl, Jack.”
“Good.” He turned and went back into the living room.
I sighed and looked at the coffee pot, wondering what in hell I thought I was doing. Jack was right. I just couldn’t seem to help myself. I had a weakness. I liked certain men. A lot. I try to be faithful. I really do. But when things go badly in a relationship my eyes wander, and sometimes it isn’t long before the rest of me does the same. I’m not proud of this trait. But for the moment, it was getting me through a really shitty time.
I poured mugs of steaming coffee and handed one to Jack, then Lucas, then went back and got my own. “If you guys want cream or sugar, it’s in the kitchen.”
“This is good. Thanks,” Lucas said, glancing at me and then back at the cup.
“He knows, Luke. Don’t bother trying to hide it.”
Lucas looked at Jack. “Okay.”
“But if it’s all the same to you guys, I’d really like to move on. Okay?” I was feeling tired and mean. Jack had been a serious buzz kill. He was harshing my gig.
“Fine,” Jack crossed his arms over his barrel of a chest. “Look, Leah. I don’t know if it’s a good idea for you to disguise yourself as a pregnant woman and hang out at the mall. It might be a waste of time.”
“It might be, Jack,” Lucas said. “But the police use decoys all the time. It does work.”
“What if I just hang around for a little while?” I asked. “Ask some questions. Maybe somebody will remember something.”
“You can do that in your regular street clothes without the disguise,” Jack said.
“Yes, but this way I’d be killing two birds with one stone.” I winced. I really hate that expression, but I couldn’t think of another that fit. “Jack, are you worried about me?”
He hesitated. “Kicks, this is just really bad. What if it goes wrong and the killer actually does grab you? Or what if they follow you home?”
“Then I’ll kick their psycho ass,” I said, but there wasn’t much kick in the way I said it. Had I lost my kick? If I had, it really could be dangerous for me to disguise myself as a pregnant woman to bait and lure a killer to me in the hopes of catching her.
“We’ll be right there with her.” Lucas said.
Although I applauded his persistence, I was a little put off that he wasn’t more worried about my wellbeing, considering the rather close moments we’d shared in the very recent past. So recent I could still smell him on me. Like the dewy remnants of a fresh, light rain on a sizzling day.
Jack was quiet for a beat. “You’re going to do what you’re going to do.”
Didn’t I always?
He looked down at the carpet, his hands laced together over his knees, then back up at me. “It just makes me nervous. I don’t like it.”
Jack wasn’t one to ever back down, and he usually didn’t worry about me this much. Maybe he sensed that I was lacking some of my former feistiness, and it concerned him. But given the right situation, I was certain that I’d get it back in a hurry.
Lucas and I watched him and waited. Like Jack said, I was going to do what I was going to do, but I wanted Jack’s blessing and his help, should I need it. And the way things had been going up until then, chances were, I may need it.
Jack lifted his hands in surrender. “Okay. Let’s do it.”
***
We got a fake pregnancy belly at a local costume shop. I tried it on under my clothes and looked in the mirror. It looked like the real deal.
“Wow. That’s how you’d look if you got knocked up,
Kicks. Groovy,” Jack laughed.
“Sexy, huh?” I said, turning this way and that. I thought I made a very nice looking pregnant lady, actually.
It was a strange thing, though. I couldn’t remember ever really considering what I’d look like pregnant. I’ve spent so much energy trying to push away commitment that it really hadn’t even occurred to me.
I was ready. I was chomping at the bit to get to that maternity store. I didn’t know what it was, but something was telling me that there was something there that would lead me to an answer. In this business, hunches are not to be ignored or taken lightly. You learn to trust your instincts.
The mall was hopping. Jack and Lucas stayed far behind me, just keeping me within sight, and I took my pregnant belly and adopted my best tired, pregnant lady walk. I wasn’t exactly waddling, but I had to make it look believable.
I went into the maternity shop, both hands resting on the top of my belly lightly. The girl at the desk smiled at me. She was young, maybe early twenties, and she was pleasantly rounded with rosy apple cheeks. Her strawberry blonde hair was tied back in a ponytail.
“Can I help you find something special?” She asked me.
“I’m just browsing right now. My friend told me about this store. Actually, you must’ve seen her.”
Her eyebrows lifted. “Oh?”
I continued. “I’m really worried about her. She’s gone missing. Have you seen her on the news? Alexia Clemmons?” I walked over to the counter.
Her eyes veiled over for a moment, completely unreadable. Then they became round with excitement. “Oh, yeah. I have seen her on the news. It’s so horrible. She just vanished like that. You know, I don’t remember having ever seen her in the store. But maybe one of the other girls has.”
“Do you think so? I’m so worried about her. Could you tell me when the other girls work? I’d really like to talk to them. See if they’ve seen her in the store.”
She nodded her head, watching my face. She wasn’t supposed to give out that kind of information, I was certain.
“I don’t want to get you into any trouble. But they may have seen her the day she disappeared. Maybe somebody was with her. You never know.”