“We have to be practical. Theresa may be leaving the treatment center, but she’s still got a rough time ahead of her. The girls will be better off here.”
Hope tried to force air into her lungs. “Maybe I should go and stay with her for the rest of the summer.”
“Theresa thought you’d say that. She said not to.”
“Why? I want to help, Joseph.”
He gripped her shoulders. “You are helping. I need you here.”
“No, you don’t. You hardly let me do anything.”
“I’m letting you tear my house apart, aren’t I?”
This wasn’t a good time for joking. Hope pushed him away. “I’m going home.”
“What about practice?”
“I’m not going.”
Hope managed to slip out of the house unnoticed. She knew Joseph would give Abby a ride to practice, and she didn’t care if she left a mess from the closets all over. She just needed to be alone.
****
“So Oliver…”
He felt his shoulders tighten as the sound of Jordan’s voice grated over his nerves.
“Did you have a nice talk with Hope’s brother?” Jordan snickered and slapped Oliver on the back. “I hope there’s no hard feelings. Remember, all’s fair in love and war.”
“Yeah, sure Jordan.” Oliver moved away, hoping to avoid further conversation.
“I can’t blame you for wanting Hope for yourself. She is hot.”
“Jordan, just drop it,” he warned.
It seemed he wasn’t getting the message because Jordan went on to describe Hope’s assets in crude language. Feeling his temperature rising, Oliver retorted, “Knock it off. Those kinds of comments are inappropriate.”
“Maybe, but they’re true.”
Oliver swung around to confront Jordan. “That’s enough.”
Jordan stepped closer to Oliver, until they were almost nose to nose. “Come on, you can’t tell me you never think of Hope that way. I saw you kiss her.”
“That’s none of your business.”
“So, don’t tell me you don’t think about—”
Oliver was usually a laid back sort of person. It took a lot to make him angry, but right now he was full blown furious. He shoved Jordan. Jordan staggered and came back with his fists raised.
There would have been a real fight then, but Andrew and Riley stepped in, pulling the men apart.
“What’s the matter with you two?” Andrew was using his principal voice, Oliver could tell, and Jordan reacted, relaxing from his fighting stance. “Who wants to tell me what the problem is?”
“He’s the one with the problem,” Jordan retorted.
“I took exception to certain inappropriate remarks he made about another team member,” Oliver admitted.
“Well, both of you knock it off. Let’s get started with practice. Isaac got held up, so I’m in charge. Jordan you can go cool off in the outfield. Oliver, you’re up to bat.”
With the confrontation with Jordan still weighing on his mind, Oliver didn’t notice at first that Hope wasn’t at practice. Abby was there, but her aunt was nowhere in sight.
Later, he overheard Sarah ask Abby where Hope was. Oliver recognized the concern in Abby’s voice. “I don’t know,” she confided to Sarah. “She and Dad had an argument or something, and she left. Dad gave me a ride to practice but he wouldn’t tell me what happened.”
He wondered if she and Joseph had fought over him. Whatever had happened, Hope must have been really upset if she had skipped practice. She’d been late plenty of times, but she’d never missed a practice all together—not even the night the triplets had scared her half to death by hiding.
“Hey Oliver,” called Riley. “We’re going out for pizza. Want to come along?”
“No thanks. I’ve got to get home.” He should go home, but he knew he wouldn’t.
Hope’s house was dark, but her car was in the drive, so he figured she was there. He leaped up the steps to her porch and rang the door bell.
“I’m right here, Oliver.”
He turned to see her seated on a bench at the end of the porch. He hadn’t seen her there because the light wasn’t on.
“What do you want? I’m not really in the mood for another discussion with you.”
“I was just worried about you. You missed practice.”
“Yeah, sorry about that. I’ll be there next time.”
He couldn’t see her face, so he walked closer.
“Are you all right?”
She laughed. “Sure. You can go home Oliver. I’m fine.”
“I don’t believe you.”
She was sitting with knees pulled up to her chest, hugging her legs. Her head rested on her knees. He sat down next to her. “What happened?”
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
He put his arm around her. “Come on. I want to hear.”
Hope pushed him away. “No. There’s nothing you can do to help.”
He’d offered to help, and she’d refused. He could leave now without the least hint of guilt. But he didn’t want to. Instead he scooped her up and set her on his lap.
“What are you doing?”
“I don’t know,” he said, drawing her close. “I just want to be here for you.”
Hope dropped her head to his chest and cried her heart out. If this were any other woman, he wouldn’t be able to get away fast enough. But for her, he wanted his shoulder to be the one she cried on.
Finally the sobs slowed and subsided altogether. Hope reached for a box of tissues sitting on the bench. She must have brought them out with her. “I’m such a mess. I’m sorry.”
“Abby told Sarah you and Joseph had a fight. It wasn’t about me, was it?”
Hope let out a muffled chuckle. “Oliver, you really have to do something about your ego. Of course it wasn’t about you.”
That was a relief, in spite of the jab about his ego. “Then tell me what happened.”
“My sister isn’t coming home.”
“The triplets’ mother?”
She nodded. “Theresa has been at a treatment center for alcoholism. She’s being released but she isn’t coming back for the girls. She doesn’t think she’s ready to have them yet.”
“Don’t you think she should be sure she can take care of them?”
“Yes. But I also can’t imagine why she wouldn’t want the support of her family at this time. I offered to spend the rest of the summer with her, but she refused.”
“Sometimes it’s hard to have our family see us when we’re at our lowest.”
She sniffed. “I suppose. I just feel so helpless. I want to do something to make it better. I guess the only thing I can do is pray. My mom would say that’s enough.”
They didn’t talk anymore. Oliver just held her until he realized that Hope had fallen asleep. He stood, still cradling her in his arms, and managed to nudge open the door to the house. He set her on the couch and covered her with an afghan from the back of a chair.
There was just enough light for him to see her tear-streaked face and swollen eyes. Without a doubt, Hope looked awful. And he felt how much he loved her with every single beat of his heart. He was in trouble. Big, big trouble.
When he got home, Oliver went straight to his bedroom and picked up Gabe’s Bible. When he’d been younger, his uncle was always the person he went to for help. The only possible chance of connecting with him now was through this Bible.
Taking a deep breath, Oliver opened the book. It was as he remembered it. The book was well used, with passages underlined, notes written in the margins and papers tucked between the pages.
Oliver flipped through the pages. He took all the papers out and opened them. They were mostly church bulletins from significant services in his uncle’s life. Among them he found the bulletin for Gabe’s own confirmation, the funerals of his parents and Oliver’s baptism. The bulletins for his mother’s and Gabe’s weddings were there, too. Oliver thought he would have thr
own them away after they ended in divorces.
This was all very interesting, but not helping. He remembered that he’d left the bulletin for his confirmation in his own Bible and decided that he should put it back with the others.
Out of curiosity, Oliver compared his confirmation service with Gabe’s. They were pretty much the same. The members of his uncle’s confirmation class all had favorite verses listed, too. He recognized the one beneath Gabe’s name. It was the same as the one he’d chosen.
Oliver remembered. It was his uncle’s favorite verse. He’d chosen it in Gabe’s honor. He flipped to Ephesians in his uncle’s bible. The verse was underlined in red and a box had been drawn around it. Oliver read, “I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints and his incomparably great power for us who believe.”
He put the Bible and the bulletins down and lay back on his bed to think. What had Hope said tonight? She wanted to do something, but all she could do was pray. “My mom would say that’s enough,” she’d said.
Oliver hadn’t said a prayer, at least not one of his own, in years. He didn’t like the idea of turning over his problems to God. He wanted to take care of them himself. But he acknowledged that the problem with Hope was bigger than he could handle.
He closed his eyes, right where he was and spoke to God. “I love Hope. I’m afraid if I let myself become a part of her life, I’ll end up ruining her life. And my own. I don’t want us to be like my parents. Would it be better to give Hope up, or do I dare to try?”
****
The phone ringing woke Hope the next morning. With a groan she rolled over—and almost off the couch. She sat up, suddenly remembering where she was and what had happened.
She dove for the phone and picked it up. “Hello.”
“So you are home.”
It was Sarah. “Yes. Where else would I be?”
“I don’t know. This is the third time I called this morning.”
“Sorry. I must have slept through the other ones.” Hope pushed her hair back out of her face. “What time is it?”
“It’s almost nine thirty. I can’t believe you were still asleep. You’re usually such an early bird.”
Hope was beginning to feel her body’s protest from sleeping on her lumpy couch. She winced at the twinge in her neck. “Did you want something Sarah?”
“Yes. I want to know where you were last night. Abby was very upset. She said you and your brother had a fight.”
“Sort of. It was more like he gave me some bad news, and I didn’t take it well.” She briefly explained about her sister, but left out everything about Oliver. The situation with him was too confusing to share with anyone. She wouldn’t know how to begin to explain it.
“Why don’t you call your sister and talk to her?” suggested Sarah. “Maybe if you hear her reasons for not coming back, you’ll feel better.”
“That’s a good idea. I think I will do that.”
“In the meantime, I’ll say a prayer for both of you. Are you sure you’re all right?”
“Yes. I crashed on the couch last night, and I ache all over. But a hot shower will take care of that.” Like right now. She hoped Sarah would take the hint.
“Are you coming to practice tonight? You know it’s the last one. Everyone is going out for pizza afterwards.”
“I’ll be there,” Hope replied, a bit of enthusiasm breaking into her voice. “I never turn down a chance for pizza.”
“Great, I’ll see you tonight.”
****
That morning Oliver went for a run and ended up on Andrew’s front porch. Andrew opened the door with a smile, scolding, “Don’t you know that no one uses the front door in Orchard Hill. Well, unless they’re running for office or selling something. Friends always come to the back.”
Smiling, Oliver told him, “I’ll remember that.”
“Come on in. Have you had breakfast yet?”
“No, but I didn’t come to mooch food from you.”
“I know that. How do you like your eggs?”
Oliver followed Andrew to the kitchen and sat at the counter while he made eggs, bacon and toast. He observed as Andrew cooked. From their first meeting, Oliver had pegged him as an upbeat person. But since he and Faith had gotten together, the man fairly shone with happiness. Oliver felt a rare moment of jealousy.
Andrew set a plate and a glass of orange juice in front of Oliver, and then brought the same for himself to the counter. They said grace, and began to eat.
He wanted to talk to Andrew about his problem with Hope, but he didn’t know where to start. “Have you and Faith picked out a wedding date yet?”
“We’re starting to narrow it down,” Andrew replied. “Maybe sometime around Christmas.”
“Oh, that’s good.” Well that didn’t open an avenue for his questions. Oliver pushed his eggs around on his plate and tried to think of another way to bring it up.
“Why don’t you just ask me whatever you want to ask?”
He looked up. “What do you mean?”
“You obviously have something on your mind. Just say it.”
“How…” Oliver stopped and frowned. He hadn’t had a confidante since his Uncle Gabe had died. It was hard to open up when you were used to keeping your own counsel.
He drew in a long breath and continued. “How do you make things work with…with someone you love.”
“That’s a bit of a complicated question. Do you want to elaborate?”
“My…my parents divorced when I was a kid. My uncle got divorced. I have a couple of aunts who just drift from one relationship to another and their kids seem to be following their lead. I don’t want to do that.”
“Of course you don’t.”
“I know all about lousy relationships. I don’t know anything about creating a good relationship that will stand the test of time. How do you do it?”
“It’s a good thing you came over early. An answer for that could take all day.”
“I decided a long time ago that I would never marry. But…there’s someone I care about. I don’t want to get together with her and then end up making her miserable. I wanted to be noble and give her up. But I can’t seem to do that. I can’t go back to not caring about her, and I don’t know how to go forward.”
“First of all,” Andrew said gently, “there are no guarantees when you love someone. Either of you could mess it all up at any time. No one wants that, but it happens.”
“Then why bother?”
“Because you might get it right. Because no one wants to be alone.”
Oliver sighed. “Maybe it’s not worth it.”
“Yes, it is. My first wife died. You don’t know what a painful loss that was. It’s like having your soul ripped in two. But I still have no regrets about marrying her.”
“How do you make it work, though? What about…what about bad moods and crazy little habits and…and Monday night football?”
Andrew laughed so hard he almost fell off his stool. “Sorry, Oliver. You have a good point, so I’ll try to answer you as honestly as I can. The truth is, if you get married, there are times when your wife will really bug you and you feel like there can’t possibly be a more annoying person on earth. And then there are times when she’ll feel the same way about you.”
“Now I’m just more confused.”
“Let me finish. There’s a very important ingredient that every good marriage needs.”
“Love? Trust?”
“Well, of course you need that. But something else. Commitment. Because no matter whom you marry, they won’t be perfect. And you never will be either. You have to be committed to sticking it out through the bad patches—and don’t take the good times for granted, either. Hold on to God and each other and you’ll make it through. Does that help you?”
“I’m not sure. You gave me a lot to think about though. Thank you, Andrew.”<
br />
“Do you want to tell me who it is that has you doing all this soul searching.”
“Um, not really.”
“That’s OK. I have a feeling I’ll know soon enough.”
****
When Hope hung up the phone after talking to Theresa, she felt much better. She was reassured that her sister really was all right. She would be staying with friends to start with, so she wouldn’t be alone.
Orchard Hill Volume Two Page 14