by Nic Saint
“He can be nice,” I hedged.
Estrella laughed. “Edie and Sam had a fight.”
“Edie and Sam?” asked Bancroft. “Don’t tell me you and Mr. Hunk are a thing?”
“And what if we are?” I asked.
“Well, but he’s so…” He puffed up his chest to indicate Sam’s general buffness. “And you’re so…” He deflated his chest and hunched his shoulders to refer to my less-than-buffness.
I directed a Death Star look at him. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Nothing. Just that he’s a hunk and you’re… not.”
“Girls can never be hunks, Bancroft,” said Busby knowingly. “Girls can be chicks.”
“So what you’re saying is that I’m not pretty enough for Sam Barkley?” I asked, my voice rising about an octave.
“Well…” Bancroft seemed to realize he’d picked a fight with the wrong not-so-hunkish anti-chick. “From an objective standpoint he’s like an eight and you’re like a… five, maybe? No, let’s make that a six. And that’s just me being a professional stylist.”
“I hate you,” I growled.
“Just making an observation.”
“I don’t think Edie’s a six,” said Busby. “More like a seven minus. She’s got great cheekbones. And she’s got a pretty great rack. Guys dig big racks,” he added for my sake.
I gritted my teeth. I had a hard time suppressing my urge to throttle both my cousins. “Well, for your information, Sam and I have been dating for months, and he never once mentioned this discrepancy between us.”
“Guy must be blinded by love,” said Bancroft. “It happens.”
“Or he’s obsessed with your rack,” Busby said helpfully. “Happens more often than you might think. Chicks that look like dogs but with great racks can score way above their average rate. I saw that every day in Hollywood.”
“You’re a moron,” I snapped at him. “And you’re a moron, too,” I added for Bancroft’s sake.
“And I have to live with these two morons every day,” said Barnum with the sigh of a long-suffering younger brother. “Woe on me.”
In spite of my bubbling anger, I had to laugh. Well, we all did, actually. Barnum might be a big PITA sometimes—or actually most of the time—but he was a great kid.
“I just hope Detective Barkley will go easy on me,” said Renée, who was touching up her lipstick now, and checking her look in a small pocket mirror.
“Sam is a sweetheart,” Ernestine assured her.
“Yeah, he’s a great guy,” Estrella added.
They both looked at me to complete the accolade but frankly I had nothing to offer. We might have been dating for months, but that seemed like a thing of the past. Sam hadn’t called me. I hadn’t called him. So technically we weren’t an item anymore. So maybe my two moron cousins were right? Maybe I was too ugly for Mr. Hunky Hunk? Finally, when I realized all eyes were on me, I shrugged. “Yeah, Sam’s okay.”
“That’s great,” said Renée, taking a deep breath, “because I’ve got a lot to say about Mrs. Leann Peach.”
Just then, the door opened and Gran walked in, followed by Sam. He directed a look at Father Reilly, totally ignoring Renée’s eager glances, and grunted, “A word, Father?”
Father Reilly disappeared with Sam, and Renée deflated like a failed sponge cake. “Well, I never. I really thought he was going to pick my brain.”
“Or something else,” Bancroft muttered.
We all stared at Gran. “So?” I asked anxiously. “What did he say?”
Gran looked a little crestfallen. “Well, it seems as if I’m on Sam’s list.”
“What list?” I asked.
“His list of suspects.”
Start Reading Witchy Start Now
About Nic
Nic Saint is the pen name for writing couple Nick and Nicole Saint. They’ve penned 60+ novels in the romance, cat sleuth, middle grade, suspense, comedy and cozy mystery genres. Nicole has a background in accounting and Nick in political science and before being struck by the writing bug the Saints worked odd jobs around the world (including massage therapist in Mexico, gardener in Italy, restaurant manager in India, and Berlitz teacher in Belgium).
When they’re not writing they enjoy Christmas-themed Hallmark movies (whether it’s Christmas or not), all manner of pastry, comic books, a daily dose of yoga (to limber up those limbs), and spoiling their big red tomcat Tommy.
www.nicsaint.com
Also by Nic Saint
Washington & Jefferson
First Shot
Alice Whitehouse
Spooky Times
Ghosts of London
Between a Ghost and a Spooky Place
Public Ghost Number One
Ghost Save the Queen
Box Set 1 (Books 1-3)
A Tale of Two Harrys
The Mysteries of Max
Purrfect Murder
Purrfectly Deadly
Purrfect Revenge
Box Set 1 (Books 1-3)
Purrfect Heat
Charleneland
Deadly Ride
Neighborhood Witch Committee
Witchy Start
Saffron Diffley
Crime and Retribution
Witchy Fingers
Witchy Trouble
Witchy Hexations
Witchy Possessions
Witchy Riches
Box Set 1 (Books 1-4)
The Mysteries of Bell & Whitehouse
One Spoonful of Trouble
Two Scoops of Murder
Three Shots of Disaster
Box Set 1 (Books 1-3)
A Twist of Wraith
A Touch of Ghost
A Clash of Spooks
Box Set 2 (Books 4-6)
The Stuffing of Nightmares
A Breath of Dead Air
An Act of Hodd
Box Set 3 (Books 7-9)
Standalone Novels
When in Bruges
Once Upon a Spy
The Whiskered Spy
The Ghost Who Came in from the Cold
Enemy of the Tates
Copyright © 2017 by Nic Saint. All rights reserved.
Published by Puss in Print Publications.
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form by any electronic or mechanical means including photocopying, recording, or information storage and retrieval without permission in writing from the author.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, brands, media, and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. The author acknowledges the trademarked status and trademark owners of various products referenced in this work of fiction, which have been used without permission. The publication/use of these trademarks is not authorized, associated with, or sponsored by the trademark owners.
Editor: Chereese Graves.