by Lovell, Dani
I look at his face, his gorgeous, happy face, and I smile, slowly, "You know why that is?"
He raises an eyebrow, suspiciously, "Why?"
"Because you lurve me."
A broad, delighted smile crosses his face and he turns to close in on me, wrapping a hand around my side, against my ribs. He tickles me, burying his face in my neck, growling and brushing his teeth against my skin, biting me gently. I screech and howl with laughter, pushing my hands against his hard chest.
"Get off me you animal!" I cry, between fits of giggles, pushing against him as I writhe underneath.
He continues, forcing me down on the sofa so he's half on top of me. My laughter gets louder as the tickling gets worse. "Stop!" I cry, I can't take any more.
He slows and chuckles, locking eyes with me. He lowers his face to gently kiss my lips, and I wrap my arms around him, to fully accept his invitation.
"Huh hmm..." I hear Oliver clear his throat, obviously, and we both giggle, sitting upright and straightening ourselves out.
Clare and Oliver sit on another sofa, watching us with amused smirks on their faces. Luke throws his arm around my shoulders again and relaxes back, resting an ankle up on the opposite knee, causing his thigh to press firmly against mine. Grr, I just want to straddle him and snog his fucking face off.
Pam enters with a tray of tea and little pastries, and puts it down on the table in front of us.
"Thank you, Pam, I hope that hasn't kept you from looking after my yummy dinner," I say, smiling jovially - but I damn well mean it.
"Your dinner is cooking slowly and perfectly, Miss Burton."
"Gah!" I cry, "Don't call me that, I'm Tilly, please call me Tilly."
"Okay - Tilly. Enjoy your tea, everyone."
"So, how was your first day?" Luke asks, looking genuinely interested. I lean forward and pour our tea from the pot, turning to hand Luke his. "Thank you, Princess," he says, and heat flushes my cheeks at his term of endearment in front of my friends. I see Clare grinning as she pours hers and she catches my eye and winks. They haven't seen me acting like this with anyone for... well, not since my ex, Scott, so about six years or so. Bea has; she saw how we interacted in LA, but these two certainly haven't.
"It was fantastic, we had a great first day, didn't we Clare?" Oliver says, turning to look at her, grinning.
"Brilliant, the snow was perfect. You'll love it Til," she says, and I stumble, not knowing quite what to say.
"Well, I, er..."
"I actually wanted to take Tilly out over the next few days, we're not too fussed about skiing yet, and I know some really cool places I'd like to show her," Luke interrupts, and I gaze up at his face, surprised. I doubt he knows how grateful I am that he's taking the heat off me a little.
"What?" Oliver asks, "You've come to Aspen for a skiing holiday, and you're not going to ski yet? Are you crazy? I thought you loved skiing?"
"Well, I did, but I had a fall last time and it has given me the heeby jeebies, plus, Luke has told me about some amazing sights, so I really want to do that."
"I can visit whenever I like, so I quite like taking time out to do other stuff, too," Luke adds, as his hand searches mine and gives a gentle squeeze. I could just kiss him all over for this. And he has no idea of the real reason he's doing this for me. Ouch.
"Oh, okay then. But we'll miss you on the slopes, make sure you join us out there after Christmas," Clare says and rests back into the sofa with her tea. I don't respond, I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.
The next hour, or so, is spent chatting comfortably, Clare and Oliver tell us every detail about their day, and Luke shares information about the best slopes and places to visit in Aspen. The men seem to get on well, as expected, they're both friendly guys and have common interests in Daniel and Bea and their cars, which is the next topic of conversation.
After a while, Luke heads upstairs to change for dinner, and the rest of us lounge by the fire, chatting.
"He's gorge!" Clare whispers enthusiastically, "And he seems like a great bloke, Til. You've been at it like rabbits all day, haven't you?"
I laugh and raise an eyebrow, "Not all day, we had to eat."
"Okay, okay," Oliver butts in, "enough of that, I'm not Bea you know, stop talking about sex."
"Aw, jealous Olly? Not getting any?" I tease.
"I get plenty, ta very much, but I'm not keen on hearing about your pursuits. You two are too close to the family, it's like hearing about my sister doing it... bleugh..." he says, quivering in disgust. Clare turns slowly to look at him with a raised brow, he simply blinks at her, and looks down at his hands, awkwardly. What's that all about? Oh... my... god...
"Eur! You two are shagging aren't you? Oh my god, I knew it!" I cry and they straighten up immediately, attempting to look innocent.
"What? No! Oh my god, Til, where did you get that from?" Clare asks, she looks mortified, maybe I should have kept that revelation to myself... but they so are.
"Til, I don't know what you think you know, but me and Clare, we're not... we're just friends, sweetheart. Close friends, yes, I'll give you that, but we're not... you know... doing anything together." He looks at Clare and she at him, they both feign innocence, curling their lips up at one another in mild disgust. "Like I said, you two are like my sisters."
"Okay, if that's what you say." I hold my hands up, not believing them for a second. I do think of Oliver as a big brother, and I imagine he sees me as a sister, but there's something different about him and Clare. She used to fancy him back when we were in college, when we first met Bea, but he had a long term girlfriend back then and showed no interest in Clare. So she got over it and it has never been discussed since, but in the last few months, they've been spending so much time together, alone, and I've been more than a little suspicious.
"Seriously Til, sort out that vivid imagination," Olly says, rolling his eyes and relaxing a little. Hmm.
My phone makes a noise in my handbag, so I stand to head to the table by the front door where I left it to check my messages.
~
LA Luke 20 Dec 17:54
Get your sweet ass upstairs and show my meat some love.
~
I laugh, loudly and reply straight away.
~
20 Dec 17:55
Show your meat some love yourself. I'm busy.
~
His reply is almost instant.
~
LA Luke 20 Dec 17:55
Get busy with me, Princess. I wanna lick you... come up. My room.
~
I quiver, I want that so much.
~
20 Dec 17:57
Lick me later, when we have more time, and then... ;-)
~
I'm selfishly glad that I didn't tell him about the baby straight away. If I had, I wouldn't have enjoyed this time with him, I wouldn't have been reminded what it's like to enjoy myself, to mess about with someone... to get fucked. Christ, I would have gone a long time without any. Better get some more, while he's still willing. I know I need to tell him though, and I will... I will.
I make my excuses to Clare and Olly, telling them I'm going to change for dinner, and I make my way up the stairs towards Luke's room. As I approach the door, my mobile phone buzzes again.
~
LA Luke 20 Dec 18:01
I want you now. :-(
~
I smile, slipping my phone into my pocket and I slowly turn the door handle, pushing it open just a little. I slip in silently and as I turn to close it, Luke appears out of nowhere, grabs me by the waist and spins me around, forcefully pushing me against the door, his lips pressing against mine, his tongue immediately searching.
I clutch his unruly, damp hair in my fists and kiss him back, moaning loudly. He lifts me, effortlessly, keeping me pressed against the door, our faces level. I subconsciously acknowledge his lack of attire, only a small white towel around his waist, his body warm and damp from the shower. I wrap my legs arou
nd him and my stomach flips in excitement, I clench in anticipation.
He caresses the side of my face with his hand; it feels good, so intimate, he's offering a different side of him than the one everyone else sees. I wonder if he handles his other women with such caring tactility, when he's not throwing them around the bedroom.
"I like you, Tilly," he says as his lips travel down my neck.
"Just as well, really," I say with a smile as he continues. I close my eyes and enjoy every touch of his soft lips.
"I mean it, I really like you. I missed you when you left."
My heart beats wildly and I writhe against him as he takes my earlobe in his teeth lightly, his excited, yet, gentle breathing, all I can hear. "Did you miss me?" he whispers, vulnerability laced through his masculine voice. I pause for a short while, enjoying the affection he's showering upon me, afraid to speak for fear of something too true escaping. "Til?" he asks, gently probing.
"Yes," I whisper, almost too quietly, "I did. I missed you."
"Luke... hey, Luke?" A loud knock on the door behind me and Daniel's voice interrupts our 'moment'.
Luke sighs, "Kinda busy in here, dude," he calls back, still kissing my neck.
"Oh, okay, hey Tilly," Daniel calls, making me laugh.
"Hi, Daniel."
"We're all downstairs about to have an aperitif, can you resume that later?"
Luke chuckles silently and drops his head to my shoulder. "Be down in a minute."
"Cool." Daniel responds, and I hear his footsteps retreat to the stairs.
I smile and pull his head up by his hair, he's smiling too. "Come on, bad-boy, let's go for dinner. We can pick up where we left off, later."
He pouts like a kid, "But I'm hard, I need you..." he lowers his head to trail kisses along my collar bone. I close my eyes, leaning my head back against the door, needing him, too.
"Don't say that, I'm so horny."
He growls and lifts his head to kiss my mouth, resting there, he looks into my eyes, "That's not something I can hear, right now. Come, the sooner we eat, the sooner we fuck. Let's go show our faces."
He releases me and I go to change in my room.
I slip on a pair of jeans and a cosy woollen jumper, and as I'm pulling on my big socks, a fully-dressed, gorgeous-looking Luke walks in. He's wearing jeans that skim his legs to perfection, showing off his incredible thighs. His v-neck, charcoal sweatshirt is soft and expensive looking, and fits impeccably... he looks like a bloody fitness model. "What is it about you?" he asks with a smile, "You're changing me; I never used to find socks a turn on at all, but now I think they're really freaking hot! It's all I want you to wear for the next two weeks."
I laugh as I stand, pulling my hair into a pony tail, "Okay, if that's what you want," I say as I pretend to unbutton my jeans.
He walks over and holds my wrists still, "Okay, okay, it's all I want you to wear for me." He brings my hand to his mouth and kisses it, "I don't want them seeing what's mine."
I raise my eyebrows, "Oh, what's yours eh? You think I'm yours?"
He smiles and frowns, "Weirdly, yes. Let's go."
I follow him out of the door, wondering what exactly that means. Is there a chance we might be able to work something out? Do I want that? Yes. I do. I knew when I left LA that I'd want more with him, but he's not that kind of bloke. Is he?
~~~~~~~
The meal with everyone was lovely. The food was exactly as I had expected, bloody amazing! It was a little awkward, trying to avoid having a glass of wine without making a big deal of it, I was handed one, so I kept it - occasionally bringing it to my lips to simulate drinking. The taste of the pungent liquid on my lips actually makes me heave a little, I've heard that some women find the thought of alcohol repulsive when pregnant; I think I must be one of them.
It was lovely to catch up with Bea's parents, Emily and Edward, they've been like parents to me since Dad died and I try to see them as much as I can, I'm always invited over to theirs for Sunday lunch with the family, and I go whenever I can, although I've been MIA in recent weeks.
Daniel's parents are also lovely, just as Bea said, so welcoming and happy. His sister, Alexia, is hard to make out; she is very quiet, seems quite nice, maybe a little prudish. I'm also not sure if she 'gets' my British humour, she doesn't seem to laugh much. Well, she does for Luke, she couldn't help but laugh at their private jokes, giggling that squeaky noise, flicking her hair about like she's in a shampoo advert. I know I sound jealous, I'm not, I just found it really fucking irritating.
Luke managed to peel himself away from Alexia long enough to join Bea, Daniel and I out on the verandah for 'one for the road' at the end of the evening. Everyone else decided to stay in the warmth, around the fire, but I really wanted a moment with the LA crew.
I had a hot chocolate with Bea, while the boys had a beer together. They held us close; Daniel had Bea tucked into his side, her arms wrapped around his waist, and Luke's arms were wrapped around my chest from behind, pressing me into his front. It felt just like LA... well, except LA was hot... Mmm, smoking hot, what a hot, sexy summer that was...
Anyway, it was great to get a moment like that, just the four of us. We told Bea and Daniel about the skiing situation, and they reacted pretty much the same as Clare and Olly did; disappointed, but accepting. I'm so grateful that Luke made the whole thing that much easier for me. I owe him one.
I managed to get a little time alone with Bea during the course of the evening; she said I seem so much happier now that I have seen Luke, and I reluctantly agreed with her. I don't want him to be able to shape my mood, I haven't let a man do that since Scott, but it's totally out of my control here, and I'm not really comfortable with it.
Bea is glowing, she adores Daniel's Aspen home and is so excited for their first Christmas together, I can't help but smile with her. They are perfect together, and so lucky to have found each other. One day, they'll have a baby, just like me. The difference being; they'll have the security of a loving relationship - she'll have the father of her child with her, supporting her... in the know.
When the front door closes, and the guests have gone, I slump on the sofa and curl into a ball, closing my eyes and enjoying the relaxing heat of the fire warming my chilly body. Clare and Oliver both said their goodnights a short while back and went up to bed separately. Luke had a message on his phone about a work emergency and had to make a business call in the study. What could possibly be so critical about personal fitness, I've no idea.
I subconsciously cradle my slightly rounded tummy and relax fully, wondering what little one is getting up to in there. I'm not feeling much in the way of flutters today, some days he's livelier than others, and he's still so tiny, he might have moved so I can't feel him... her. I can feel the difference inside, if I poke my belly, I can feel a hard ridge, or if I run or hop or something, I feel a heavy, full sensation, almost as if there's a grapefruit sitting in my pelvis.
It's strange, but I like it; it reminds me that I'm never going to be alone, even if... when Luke decides to do a runner, it'll always be me and Wriggler. Oh... Wriggler, I don't want to tell him. He'll leave and I'll go back to being a miserable bitch again. I promise I'll be happy when you join me out here, though, I will, I'm so excited to see you.
I drift off, comfortable and warm, thinking about those ten little fingers and ten little toes. Mmm, so cosy.
CHAPTER FOUR
FRIDAY 21ST DECEMBER
I need a wee, badly. I moan and turn in bed, preparing to sit up when Luke's voice startles me. "No..."
I can't recall coming to bed last night - to Luke's bed. I blink a couple of times, attempting to clear my head, it's not like I've been drinking. I'm naked, except for my knickers, but all I remember is falling asleep on the sofa. I slip out of bed, to grumbles galore from Luke, and dash to the en-suite.
When I finish, I head back to find him sprawled out in all his naked glory, looking ridiculously gorgeous. I pick up the jumper I was wearing l
ast night, and pull it on to cover my torso. I notice I'm still wearing my socks and smile.
Sitting cross-legged on the bed next to him, I gently run my fingertips along his washboard abs, he is the sexiest man alive, without a doubt. I lean down to lay a gentle kiss on his chest, and watch as his mouth curls into a slight smile as he sleeps. I try to picture him as a dad - but I can't, he's probably great with kids but nowhere near responsible enough to have and take care of one of his own.
I check the time on my phone, which is on the bedside table; again, no recollection of this. It's only six thirty, so I should probably get some more sleep, but I feel wide awake - I must have slept like a log. I climb off the bed and take a thick blanket from the chair, heading towards the balcony. Opening the curtains just enough to crack the door, I slip out into the ice cold morning with the blanket around me. It's peaceful, I feel so cosy, wrapped up like this, my thick socks keeping my toes toasty.
I stare into the snowy pine trees ahead and listen as the weightless snow floats to the ground. It's silent, not a bird rustling in the trees, not a gust of wind rushing past; nothing. I rest against the railing and close my eyes, taking a deep, cool, fresh breath in.
Wriggler tugs at something gently, making me smile, I can't wait until she's bigger and I can feel big kicks. I feel happy in a strange way, I have my little secret with me, I'm getting more and more excited about his or her arrival, and I'm with Luke having such a wonderful time. I would probably be a lot more happy if I could share my news with everyone - have Luke be the excited, expectant father, but thinking that way is unrealistic and I daren't get carried away in case I persuade myself that it could happen.
I hear the door creak behind me, and Luke's huge, warm arms wrap around me, his head sinking to kiss my neck, making my knees go a little weak.
"Morning hot-lips, want me to make you come?"
I grin, resting my head back onto his chest, and giggle, "Good morning, bad-boy, I always want you to make me come. I'm just enjoying the quiet out here so early in the morning, it's amazing."