I did not expect to use Wakil’s words so soon, but this is something they need to consider before endangering the whole of Securus.
“That’s easy for you to say,” Eyra interrupts. “It’s not like any us get the chance to gallivant around on the surface whenever the whim strikes like you do.”
“Gallivant?” I sneer, no longer bothering to hide my disdain. “Are you really that stupid? You need to actually think before you spew out so much ignorance, it poisons us all. I sure as hell don’t see you volunteering for anything that would put your own precious life in danger. If you want to meet one of the mountain lions in person, I would love to make the introduction. Then you can tell me about my gallivanting.”
My voice trembles from frustration. The audacity and stupidity of her words are almost too much to bear. I walk toward her and her cronies with my hands tightened into fists. Eyra does not react or speak. She is too shocked by my reaction. Luckily for her, a single voice of reason remains in this room.
“You both need to calm down,” Talia says, stepping in my way and pointing me to a chair. The feel of her hand on my shoulder weakens my anger. I follow her order.
“Kagen only proves my point,” Eyra says, regaining her voice. “He does what he wants and thinks he’s above us all.”
“Really?” Talia growls, cutting Eyra off. “How many times have you been a moment from death while trying to free us? How many of your friends have you personally seen murdered by those who work to keep us enslaved? Kagen has sacrificed more than anyone to get us to this point. If you dare imply anything else again, I will have you removed from this council and give you the opportunity to show us all how easy it is to survive on the surface alone.”
Talia rarely shows this much emotion. So her sharp words command the attention of the entire room. No one interrupts anymore. Instead, they all wait for her to continue.
“We’ve only survived this long because we have been patient and meticulous. This isn’t the first time our people have tried to escape Caelum. Would you like to see what happened the last time we gave in to the urge for action before we were prepared?” No one replies. Talia pulls out her Coden and taps in her instructions while we wait. She points our attention to the screen on the side wall. “This is what happens.”
When we were on the surface, I must have been too distracted to notice Taig was taking pictures. But there they are. She first shows us a close up of one of the stone markers, telling of the horrors that befell our people. Talia intentionally displays the marker describing a Pellagra-like disease, keeping the picture on the screen long enough for everyone to understand. The next image draws a horrified gasp from the entire council. To emphasize our point she shows a wide view of the entire field with its countless graves. Sometimes the council loses sight of the cost of our actions since they are always sheltered from the death and destruction forced upon us. Now they see the true toll taken by Caelum.
“Every single one of those mounds is a life that was lost because like you, they were tired of being patient,” Talia says, with her voice returning to her normal diplomatic tone. "Our people were divided then as well. Many of them left the facility before adequate preparations were made. Like you are asking for now, they wanted immediate action at the cost of caution. This is what happened. Every single one of them died. If any of you think this is an acceptable alternative, then by all means, vote against me and distribute the untested antidote to our people. But if you value the lives of our people, and want to make sure we do something more than make the field on that screen bigger, vote to give us more time.”
Janae looks down with defeat on her face. She knows Talia is right and must finally be admitting the truth to herself. Eyra, on the other hand, appears to be furiously searching her mind for a viable counterargument. This is nothing new for her. Everything she does is intentionally crafted for political posturing. Even when she is wrong, she always tries to win some concession to save face. Before she has a chance, Talia calls the vote. All we need is for the votes to distribute the antidote to be less than two-to-one majority. In that case, even if the council votes to proceed, Talia can override the decision. If the vote exceeds a two-thirds majority, Talia would have no choice but to allow the decision to stand.
When the votes are entered, Talia’s argument proves persuasive. The final tally shows the majority took Talia’s message to heart. As usual, she has found a way to save the council from themselves. Times like this show Talia’s value to Securus. Without her unique ability to gain the support and cooperation of people with conflicting goals, we would never have even come this far. With that decided, Talia clears the room. The moment the others leave, I feel her eyes on me.
“I know, Talia,” I say, knowing my angry outburst was counterproductive. “It’s just been really hard lately dealing with all of this.”
“That’s not what I wanted to talk about,” she interrupts. “It’s about tomorrow.”
“We can’t delay it.” I prepare to mount my protest until she cuts me off again.
“I don’t want to delay it,” Talia says. “I’m coming with you.”
Her words horrify me. Even with our preparations and knowledge gained from prior trips, going through unexplored areas of the forest will be extremely dangerous. I cannot let her go. If anything happened to Talia, I would be lost.
“That’s a bad idea, Talia,” I say. “You’re needed here.”
“Yes, but this is important,” she says with stubborn determination. “It would be meaningful if I were there to meet with the people from Munitus during our first planned contact.”
“Talia, you can’t be everywhere,” I counter, refusing to give in to her demand. “Even if my emotions have gotten the better of me lately, I would never let that happen out there. And, yes, I know you’re the best diplomat we have, but I can’t risk losing you. You mean everything to me, and just as much to Securus itself.”
“Kagen, you don’t realize how hard it is to sit here without knowing what’s happening out there or if you’re even still alive.”
“I know you worry, Talia, but that’s what the situation demands of us,” I say. “It’s hard on me too. The one thing that gives me solace when things go wrong is knowing you’re safe within these walls. Even more than that, just think of what would’ve happened today if you weren’t here. Who else could’ve convinced them to wait? And what would happen if the Controller sent a message when you were unavailable to receive it?”
It takes a few more moments, but the pain in Talia’s eyes tells me she knows I am right. Even though she does not like it, she resigns to staying in Securus. I hold her tightly in my arms, futilely trying to reassure her. She wipes away a lone tear before leaving the room. It takes me a while to get up. I do not like to make Talia worry. Unfortunately, there is no other way.
The one good thing to come out of this morning is the result of the vote. Knowing Talia has that under control gives me one less thing to worry about while I am away from Securus. Ready to return my focus to the upcoming expedition, I make my way to the exit chamber to check on Radek’s progress with the supplies. The room is much more crowded than expected.
“What are you two doing up here?” I ask in a playful tone, hoping they are not mad.
“You were planning on telling us, weren’t you?” Sayda scolds me.
“Of course, but I was hoping to do it on my way out,” I admit, moving back a couple steps to stay out of Sayda’s reach.
“Don’t think for one second we’re not going with you,” Hadwin says with his arms folded in front of him. His seriousness and determination surprises me. I expected as much from Sayda, but he is usually the understanding one.
“I know you guys want to go, but if we have too many people away from Securus, Caelum might notice.” My excuse is not the real reason, only the best argument that came to mind.
“By my count, there are less people here than when Aamon escaped, and they didn’t notice anything then,” Hadwin coun
ters. “What’s really going on?”
“It’s just, with your leg…” I pause, searching for the right words
“I can move just fine,” Hadwin snaps, cutting me off.
“Okay, the truth then. I can’t stop thinking about what happened to Nyree. She never would’ve been caught by that mountain lion if it weren’t for her injury. It’s hard enough having her death on my conscious, let alone repeating the same mistake with you.”
Sayda walks in front of me. This time there is no fire in her eyes, only a shared heartache. “Kagen, what happened to her wasn’t your fault. We all know the risks of what we’re doing. You don’t need to protect us.”
Hearing those unexpected words from Sayda stuns me for a moment. She always tries so hard to protect us all, and even she thinks I am being overprotective. Hoping for an ally, I look past my two determined friends and meet eyes with Radek. I am sure he would prefer for Sayda to stay in Securus, but he does not help me. The only way to keep them from going is to use my rank to forbid them from joining us. Only, if I did that, they would never forgive me.
“Fine, you guys can go,” I say, giving in to the inevitable. “Radek, do we have enough supplies for them?”
“Yeah, when I went to the Research Department to get the new weapons, Sayda figured out what was going on,” he shrugs. “I knew we couldn’t keep her away so we’ve been planning for them to come already.”
Behind him lie our packs with supplies laid out in front of them. Amongst the supplies are various containers of food, small tools, materials to build a shelter, and of course, weapons. Everything we will need is already here, ready to be packed. Now all we need to do is get some rest and wait for the morning. As anxious as I feel, resting will not be easy.
*
That night, after another emotional dinner with my family, Talia and I lay in bed. Right now, nothing else matters, so I push everything else out of my mind and focus on Talia. Every one of these trips seems to be taking a bigger and bigger toll on her. Seeing her worry pains me.
“For once, we’re totally prepared for the surface. I’ll be back with you in no time,” I tell her.
“I’m not worried about the forest. You need to be careful when you meet the representatives from Munitus,” she replies
There are so many moving parts to our future. Nothing is certain. Though I do not want to acknowledge it, if something happens to me, this could be the last time we get to hold each other in our arms. The moment is not something I take for granted.
“I will,” I assure her. “And while I’m gone, you might want to find some time to talk with Wakil. I think he knows more than he’s letting on about the poison in our food.”
She simply nods in reply.
“And, Talia,” I say. “Thank you for being so understanding. I know my temper has been kind of uneven lately. This has been harder to deal with than I ever imagined. I don’t know how you stay sane through it all.”
“Having my boy toy to share the burden helps,” she says coyly.
After a few more minutes, we both close our eyes even though we stay awake for most of the night. When the morning alert sounds, we move for the first time all night. Instead of getting up, Talia squeezes me tighter, not allowing me out of bed just yet.
“I would love nothing more than to stay here with you, but every minute counts,” I whisper to her with my cheek resting of her forehead.
“These minutes count most of all,” she reminds me. I am powerless to resist.
It is not until Talia eventually gets up to prepare for the morning announcements that she lets me out of her arms. As she kisses me goodbye, a tear forms in my eye. When Talia leaves the room, I suddenly feel empty, as if my heart left with her. I do not know why, but it felt like that was a final goodbye. Wiping the tear from my cheek, I get up to put on my Leadership uniform. Today, I am proud to affix our altered Leadership insignia onto the mineral grey uniform. The insignia is symbolic of our change as a colony. Hopefully, Munitus will join us in that change.
Instead of the usual breakfast, today we have a concentrated nutrient mix waiting for us in the exit chamber. We need to ensure coming down with Pellagra will not be a concern. I force down the tasteless sludge and check my pack while waiting for the others to arrive. Soon, Radek appears in the doorway with Korin at his side. To my surprise, Baran is with them.
“Eyra happened to be there when I went to get Korin. She insisted we bring at least one other Guard along,” Radek explains, seeing the puzzled look on my face.
One more person should be okay, but we are pushing our luck with Caelum’s count. If she would have tried to insert someone I had not met before onto the team, I would have resisted. But Baran was helpful before, so his addition does not bother me. I turn my attention back to my pack. None of us even have to look to know when Hadwin and Sayda arrive.
“Everyone can rest easy, I’m here,” Hadwin announces when he walks in.
“Make sure to double check your supplies,” I tell the group, ignoring Hadwin’s modesty. For a moment I question the decision to keep him and Radek on the same trip with Sayda. Then again, if they did anything to jeopardize our mission because of their feelings for Sayda, they would have to answer to her. Neither of them would be that foolish. “Once you’re ready, come to the ladder, and we’ll get going.”
Radek immediately walks through the inactive decontamination chamber and waits for the rest of us next to the ladder. I grab my pack, before positioning myself on the other side of the ladder to wait for the rest of our team. Right about now, Talia must be doing the announcements, which means she will not be here to send us off. Her absence this time is probably a good thing because with the way I felt seeing her leave earlier, another goodbye would be overwhelming. Even the reminder of having to be away from Talia again causes the hollowness inside me to grow.
When the others join us, I sling my rifle over my shoulder and head up the ladder. The fresh, cool air does not feel as inviting or invigorating as it has in the past. Both Radek and I pull out our maps. We had the research team put together a rudimentary map of the area from what we learned on our previous trips combined with the direction of the railway tunnel. For safety, we plan on heading southeast, directly over the tunnels in case we need to escape into them. I squint to check my map against the glare of the rising sun, confirming our direction is true.
Radek and I take the lead. My stomach tingles when we pass the tree-line, anticipating what may come. The temperature is noticeably colder than the last time we were out here. Above us, most of the trees look the same as before, but a few scattered ones have developed a deep orange coloration staining their leaves.
The terrain ahead of us turns upward into a steep incline that combines with the loose foliage to make for a slippery hike. Still, we march forward, determined to keep a good pace. After a few minutes, Radek and I begin to separate from the others. Normally we would keep closer together, but on this hill we just want to get to the top.
“You know, Kagen, I’ve been meaning to talk to you,” Radek says. He speaks calmly, without any need to catch his breath because our exertion. Like usual, he shows no external signs of fatigue. “I heard about what happened in your breakfast hall.”
“Not one of my better moments.” Because of the strain from our hike, my words come out much slower than his. On top of that, keeping a deliberate tone helps me ward off the annoyance from remembering how those two men got under my skin.
“Actually, I think it was,” Radek replies. “Despite knowing what’s going on, most of our people are shielded from Caelum’s true brutality. Some of them haven’t yet grasped the reality of our situation. Sometimes they need some emotion to effectively get a point across. You reaction showed everyone how much your friends and our cause means to you.”
“I would’ve showed a lot more than just emotion if my mother hadn’t stopped me,” I tell him.
He shrugs his shoulders and keeps moving forward. Even if this conversation is
ultimately inconsequential, his words do help. After all, Radek is not quick to give praise or reassurance. That trait has a lot to do with his past.
When I first saw him going into The Caves, he seemed familiar to me. It was not until much later that I realized why. Despite being an only child, Radek has had to be self-reliant from a very young age. His father has always been completely engrossed in his work, spending all his free time away from his family. Even worse, his mother suffers from a debilitating neurological condition that often leaves her unable to care for herself. Our rounding Healers help as much as possible, but we can only do so much. During my training, I went to their quarters to check on his mother. When we were not there, Radek was the one to take care of her. That is a tremendous responsibility for anyone so young to take on his shoulders. Instead of being crushed beneath the weight of his hardship, Radek was hardened by it.
Once we finally reach the top of the hill, we wait for the others to catch up. So far, Sayda has stayed close to Hadwin’s side. Judging by the frown on his face, that does not please Radek. Korin and Baran have their pistols out and constantly sweep the area behind us, watching for any sign of danger.
“You guys okay to keep moving?” I ask.
The only answer I get is annoyed stares. Instead of pressing my luck, I turn to look ahead. Our direction is blocked by a thick expanse of bushes. Radek moves forward, intending to wade through them. Before he gets too far, I reach out and grab his arm. He jerks back, nearly losing his balance before stopping to see what is wrong.
“Those plants look like the stuff Taig and I saw on the last trip. If you touch it, your skin will feel like it was set on fire. We should go around,” I tell him.
My eyes search to the left and right, looking for the end of the poisonous wall. Unfortunately for us, the plant spreads out far in each direction. Getting around this barrier will take a while. To the left, the terrain slopes downward, giving us an expanded view. As far as I can see in that direction, the expanse of poison oak is only broken up by some trees and a few scattered boulders. That leaves the other direction as our best option, which means we have another steep incline to go up. The only positive is that so far we have not seen any animal trails or heard any predators tracking us through the forest.
The Seat of Power (The Securus Trilogy Book 3) Page 9