by Lulu Taylor
Letty leaves them and goes to the house to look for Arthur but she cannot find him anywhere. Checking the cloakroom, she finds his heavy greatcoat gone, and comes out into the hall disconsolate.
‘I want him here,’ she says out loud. She wants to talk to him about what he said in the church and what he meant to do. How can the place be blown wide open, and what will it mean for them all? Letty is not sure she wants that to happen, even with her faith in the Beloved melting away. But it seems she is too late and he’s gone off to do whatever it is he means to do. The house is empty, with everyone still at the church, and she wanders about the hall, wondering what it will be like when they come back. Almost without thinking, she goes to the library door and opens it. This used to be her father’s domain and now it is the Beloved’s, his private study entered only at his invitation.
Why is it his? she thinks. What did he do to deserve it? It’s only his because Arabella gave it to him. And she only gave it to him because he worked his spell on her, like he does on all of them.
The words that Arthur uses about him float through her mind: charlatan, fraud, rogue and rascal. She sees it suddenly as Arthur painted it for her – the way everything the Beloved wanted fell into his lap because of the way he manipulates people.
She walks over to the desk and looks at the papers on the top. There are half-written letters, others received from lawyers and bankers to do with the running of the house and the estate. Then she sees, beneath a jade paperweight, a small scrap of paper folded up and tucked there. She lifts it out and opens it. It’s written in frantic handwriting:
I know I’m too wicked to be allowed to live. He said if I believed, I’d be saved, but I can’t believe. I want to, but I can’t because if it is all true as he says, then why does he do such things to me, such as he says the Devil wants? He says I make him do it with my original sin and my tempting ways and because the Devil is in me. I’m sorry, I’m too wicked to live.
Letty stares and reads it again, twice, three times. Oh Emily. I didn’t want to believe it. She feels agonised with pity for the poor girl. Why did he torment her by telling her it was all her fault? She recalls him beating on the girl’s chest and Emily falling to the floor in a fit. As though he was trying to cast out a demon. Poor child, she must have thought she was possessed. A thought occurs to her. But the Beloved has read this. He knows. Perhaps this is why he decided that now was the time to make the greatest claim of all, to keep his flock close. To distract them from asking him awkward questions. No doubt more than one other has seen this note. Someone found it and brought it to the Beloved. No wonder he is asserting his power.
I don’t believe it can go on. Surely they must see what he’s really like?
But where is Arthur? What is he doing? If only he’d waited, they could have found this note together, and used it to show the Beloved for what he really is.
‘Letty! What are you doing in here?’
Letty looks up swiftly to see Arabella in the doorway, watching her in horror. She says quickly, ‘Arabella. We have to talk about the Beloved.’
‘Should I tell him you are nosing among his private papers?’ Arabella advances, her expression sternly outraged. ‘What on earth can you be thinking?’
Letty holds out the scrap of paper to her sister. ‘You have to see this, Arabella. It’s a note from Emily Payne, explaining why she jumped into the lake. It isn’t what we thought. He’s fooling us all. He’s not the new Moses or the next dispensation, or the . . . one we are expecting to come back.’ She can’t bring herself to say it. There has been too much blasphemy in this house already and she’s ashamed of it. ‘He’s been . . . having his way with the girls here, the same as he has with you. He told me to sleep with Arthur too! Just to keep him here.’
‘I expect you relished that little instruction, didn’t you, dear sister?’ Arabella says with spite, ignoring the other accusations. ‘We’ve all seen the way you look at him. You’re quite enraptured, aren’t you? I don’t expect you quibble too much with the Beloved’s decision on that matter. I wouldn’t be surprised if you haven’t been bounding about with him since the very first night.’
‘Arabella!’ Letty stares at her in horror. ‘How can you say such a thing?’
‘It’s clear that wicked young man has dripped his poison into your ear. You were supposed to save him, you fool! But no. You’re too weak willed for that, aren’t you? You’ve allowed yourself to be made an agent of darkness instead. You two are clearly in cahoots. Well, it won’t last much longer. I’m going to put a stop to it.’ Arabella’s dark eyes flash dangerously. ‘And the Beloved agrees with me. It’s time Mr and Mrs Kendall know what kind of serpent they’ve bred. And he’ll lose the inheritance he’s so eager to get his hands on. They’ll disown him in a second, now that the Beloved has made known the truth.’
‘The truth? Do you . . . do you believe it, Arabella?’ Now that the scales have fallen from her own eyes, it is hard to believe that anyone could be so wilfully blind as to find any of it credible. The Beloved has banished death? He has forbidden carnal relations? Then why is Emily dead? Why is Sarah ill upstairs? And why is there a child kindling inside Arabella?
‘Of course I believe!’ cries Arabella. She throws her arms wide. ‘I have been chosen! I am the favoured bride. I am the womb.’
Letty’s mouth drops open. She never believed Arabella insane, not when Cecily and Edward had her bundled off to the asylum and not when she came so triumphantly back. But now, staring into her sister’s wild eyes, she wonders if perhaps it is the answer, the reason why Arabella fell so thoroughly into her belief in the first place. And all that the Beloved has said and done has played directly into her madness. It must make perfect sense to her; it always did. And now that the Beloved has taken the ultimate masculine role for himself, it falls to her to fulfil the ultimate female one. The queen of heaven.
‘Arabella, please.’ She holds out the note. ‘Read this. You’ll understand then, you’ll see the truth.’
Arabella snatches the note and tears it into tiny pieces, throwing them up and scattering them around. ‘That’s what I think of your forgery. No doubt you and Arthur cooked it up between you. Though you ought to be ashamed of what you’re doing to poor Emily’s memory!’
Letty watches the torn paper fall with dismay. The evidence she wanted to give Arthur has gone. Now there is only her testimony. ‘You know that’s a lie,’ she says firmly.
‘It’s your word against mine and against the Beloved’s. And now, you little troublemaker, now that you’ve gone to the Devil, you shall have to be contained until we’ve decided what to do with you!’ Arabella goes to her sister and grabs her around the arms. ‘Help, someone! Help me!’
‘Let me go!’ shouts Letty, struggling, but Arabella is too strong to shake off, even with the residue of her tiredness. ‘Let me go!’
‘Help me!’ yells Arabella, and in a moment, the door opens and three Angels rush in, one of them Kitty, then stop, astonished to see the sisters struggling together. ‘Well, don’t just stand there! I caught her spying on the Beloved. She’s plotting with that Kendall boy for his downfall. Help me take her!’
The Angels hesitate only for a second, then join Arabella in restraining Letty. Kitty holds Letty’s arms with sadness in her eyes.
‘Now come, miss. It’s for your own good. It won’t be for long, just until you come to your senses.’
They bundle her up and take her upstairs to the blue bedroom, where she is dumped on the bed and locked in, the key taken away.
Letty manages to sleep during the night, in between fits of trembling outrage and fear. The speed with which the tables have been turned against her is startling. Will the Beloved allow this treatment of her? But once he is told that she took Emily Payne’s note from his desk, he will no doubt concur with Arabella that she has turned against the community. What will they do with her? Will she be locked up, as Arabella once was, and the world told she has lost her reason?
At other times, she worries about Arthur and where on earth he might be. There is no doubt that he is under suspicion; Arabella confirmed that the Beloved has given up on his attempts to win him over. Arthur will be banished, that’s inevitable. The rumour that they are in cahoots will no doubt spread quickly. She finds it strange that gossip about the Beloved’s behaviour changes nothing, but one word from Arabella and she is accepted as a traitor.
But will Arthur be able to help me?
She doesn’t see how. Their marriage has no legal standing. He has no rights over her. She sees suddenly that she is powerless, at the mercy of her sister and the Beloved, and whatever they decide to do with her.
The next day dawns bright and warm. Letty has slept in her clothes and feels uncomfortable so she washes in the dressing room, putting on a plain brown skirt, blouse and jumper and sensible laced shoes.
One of the Angels, not Kitty, brings in a tray of breakfast for her – a typically hearty meal even though she is in disgrace – and leaves her to eat it. The Angel’s injured air and refusal to meet her eye reveals the extent of the feeling against Letty downstairs. She can hear frantic activity going on all around her. Carpets are beaten outside, and there is the clank of a bucket and the splash of dirty water being thrown away.
They are cleaning. Then she laughs out loud. They are cleaning for the last days! They’re expecting heavenly visitors very soon. She has a ridiculous picture in her head of an avenging angel with a fiery sword coming in, looking about and saying, ‘Oh, I do like what you’ve done in this room! Delightful choice of curtains.’
Poor silly fools. Poor trusting people.
It wouldn’t be so bad if they weren’t destined for disappointment. How long would they all wait here for the day to come? How long would they go on believing in the Beloved in the face of all the evidence to his humanity, mortality and fallibility?
She spends the day looking out of the window, reading and wondering where Arthur can possibly be.
Meals are brought at lunch time and supper time, an unfriendly Angel delivering and then coming back to collect the tray. Apart from that, she sees no one. When the supper tray is collected, she senses a change in the atmosphere. ‘Paula, what’s going on downstairs?’ she asks.
Paula looks strained. ‘I can’t say.’
‘Is there trouble?’
Paula hesitates, obviously wanting to tell her. ‘A difficulty,’ she finally says. ‘But not one we can’t overcome with prayer and faith.’
‘What is it? I hope it’s nothing serious . . .’
Paula can’t resist. She leans in, checking first over her shoulder as if there might be someone listening. ‘It’s the village,’ she mutters. ‘There’s going to be a big meeting round the war memorial tomorrow. Dickie’s been down there and says it’s tense as you like. They’re being stirred up something terrible. Dickie says they shouted some awful things at him. We none of us know what they’ll do.’ Paula, agitated by her own careless talk, picks up the tray and hurries off, not forgetting to lock the door behind her.
Letty can only wait and wonder, though she is not afraid of the foment in the village. It’s gossip and nonsense, that’s all.
It is much later and she is asleep in bed when a noise disturbs her. It’s coming from outside her window, not on the ground but somewhere nearer. For a moment she’s frozen with fright, staring at the pillow and listening as hard as she can. Then she hears a grunt and a muttered ‘Ouch!’ and she leaps out of bed and hurries to the window. Pushing it open, she sticks out her head and sees a large shape stretching itself down from the roof and onto the small stone balcony outside her window while hanging on tightly to the iron downpipe.
‘Arthur!’ she whispers loudly, happiness filling her with delicious warmth.
‘Yes!’ he whispers back. ‘This is all very Romeo and Juliet, isn’t it? Is my foot near the ledge?’
‘Swing a little to your left and you’re there.’
A second later, he drops, breathless, into the balcony and scrambles through the window. As soon as he is in her room, he wraps her in his tight embrace, kissing her hard, then letting her go and standing back to look at her.
‘You’re a sight for sore eyes, Letty, sweet.’
‘You came back!’ she says joyfully.
‘Of course I did. I climbed the fire escape ladder at the back, got up onto the roof and came round the flat part at the front. The only tricky bit was getting to your window. You didn’t think I’d leave you here, did you?’
She clasps his hands tightly. ‘But where have you been?’
‘I’ve been in London, working on getting the fraud exposed. You’ll see what will happen. We’ll put a stop to all the nonsense here, just wait.’
‘But how?’
Arthur shakes his head. ‘Not yet. It’s a surprise.’ His gaze travels appreciatively over her nightgown. ‘Looks like I woke you up.’
She flushes. ‘That doesn’t matter.’
His eyes become intense as he looks at her. ‘I’ve missed you, Letty.’
‘I’ve missed you too.’
He pulls her to him and kisses her. The sensation sets every nerve in her body tingling, and her stomach swooping with almost painful excitement. When he pulls away, breathless, she knows that he feels the same.
‘Letty,’ he says, his voice choked. ‘Oh Letty.’
They kiss again, lingering now over the delicious sweetness. She longs to be pressed against him, but when they part at last, he steps away from her.
‘You know I would never take advantage of you, Letty,’ he says, his tone more serious than she has ever heard from him before.
She nods and smiles softly. ‘Of course, I am your wife.’
He laughs wryly. ‘That is the irony. But until the law and the Church of England say so, I’m afraid that it doesn’t count. But I’m happy just to be with you while I can.’
There is a creak outside the bedroom door and they both stand statue-still, listening hard. Footsteps move slowly past in the corridor. Letty’s heart is thumping and she holds her breath as the sound fades.
‘We mustn’t be discovered,’ she whispers. ‘The atmosphere here is very strange.’
‘He knows he’s in trouble,’ Arthur whispers back. He takes Letty’s hand. ‘Come on. We can cosy up together. They won’t hear us talk that way.’
Letty climbs into bed, covering herself up with the sheets, but Arthur, once his boots are off, stays on the outside, one arm around her. She loves being so close to him, her nose almost touching his cheek so that he can turn for small kisses between words. Letty hasn’t counted exactly how many nights they’ve spent together in this room without ever touching, but she knows now that each one has been a terrible waste. Arthur beside her, his arms around her, his mouth close to hers, is so blissful she can’t believe they have denied themselves for so long.
Arthur says, ‘If my plan comes off, this bounder will be exposed for what he is.’
‘What is your plan?’
He looks down at her soberly. ‘I shan’t say now. I’ll explain later.’
She nestles into him. ‘Arthur, you’ve always known, haven’t you?’
‘Of course. When my parents got involved with Phillips, I made a study of him. He’s the usual sort – an inferior type of man, attracted to the theatre and stardom of his brand of evangelical religion. There are people like him all over the world. Always have been, and always will be. Some are saints, no doubt, but most are not. Not men like Phillips. They enjoy the feeling of destiny and of controlling others, and getting what they can from the whole racket. Including lots of lovely cash.’
‘I can’t believe he’s so wicked,’ Letty whispers, marvelling at the beauty of Arthur’s jawline as she runs her fingertips along it.
‘He may not be really wicked. Flawed, like all of us. Careless of his power over others and how it can damage them. Emily won’t be the last person to hear about hellfire and brimstone and all of that, and be driven to death
by it.’
‘Do you think he believes it?’
‘I think, like many of us, he’s able to believe two things at once, even completely contradictory things. At the same time as he is convincing himself that he really does feel divine power coursing through him and that he’s immune to death, he knows that his earthly appetites are worth fulfilling just in case.’
‘But I can’t hate him, despite everything,’ Letty says, lifting her chin to kiss him again, ‘because he brought me you.’
They go to sleep, wrapped in each other’s arms. When Letty wakes early the next morning, the bed is empty beside her and she can hear the splashing of water in the dressing room. A few minutes later, Arthur comes out, washed and dressed.
‘I have to leave now,’ Arthur says gravely. ‘I shouldn’t have stayed so long. I daren’t be discovered here. I think Phillips has a good idea of what I’m up to, and that could put you in harm’s way.’
‘I don’t want you to leave,’ she says, disappointed.
He comes over to the bed and leans down to kiss her tenderly again.
‘And I don’t want to leave you. I’m sorry, my sweetheart, but I must go. I haven’t finished the work I have to do.’ He sits down on the bed beside her. ‘I had to come back to see you again and ask you if you would consider coming with me.’
‘With you?’ she says, almost wonderingly.
‘Yes. I can’t simply leave you here, knowing what I know of Phillips.’
‘I suppose I’m not exactly persona grata here.’ She tells him about Emily Payne’s note and Arabella’s response. ‘They think we’re in league and probably imagine that I’m just as wicked as you are. They locked me in here all day yesterday. It’s almost menacing.’
Arthur frowns. ‘Then what are we waiting for? You must come away with me at once. I’m not leaving you here. I’m going to try my hand at being a journalist in London. I’m afraid I’m going to need a job now that my father is bound to cut me off without a sou. I shouldn’t think I’ll be going back to Oxford, not without money. And after that, I’ve an idea that we really ought to be properly married, if you’d like it.’